Do you consider AV Sex Cheating on your real life Spouse if the flame has gone?

I understand how you feel, however; if one goes out in a game and kills monsters; should one feel that they have murdered? Another interesting perspective. I know that there is no emotion behind the monster though nor is it real.

Candy,
Exactly. You can never hope to one day meet up with said monster irl. Although women need to consider that danger too. That some men can be "monsters/predators" that they should beware of.

I don't have a Case..never claimed one. Cheating is Cheating..Adultery is having Sex behind your Spouses back.

Cyber Adultery

Words can be very powerful, and if you feel that there is cheating going on that takes the love, interest and eroticism elsewhere, then it is cheating. If he/she cannot understand that this is hurting you and your marriage, even with a written ultimatum stating that it's "our headboard or the keyboard," then you have some serious decision-making to do regarding your future.

February 2, 1996 HUSBAND SEEKS DIVORCE OVER ON-LINE AFFAIR

BRIDGEWATER, New Jersey (AP) -- A man filing for divorce accused his wife of carrying on a "virtual" affair via computer with a cybersex partner who called himself "The Weasel."

Diane Goydan's relationship with the man apparently never was consummated, but her husband, John Goydan of Bridgewater, claimed the pair had planned a real tryst this weekend at a New Hampshire bed and breakfast.

Goydan filed divorce papers January 23 that included dozens of e-mail exchanges -- some sexually explicit -- between his wife and a married man she met on America Online. The man, whose on-line name was The Weasel, was identified in court papers only as Ray from North Carolina.

In a November 23 message, The Weasel wrote: "I gotta tell you that I am one happy guy now and so much at peace again anticipating us. I love you dearly. XXOOXX."

Goydan is now seeking custody of the couple's two children, ages 3 and 7.

Goydan's lawyer, Richard Hurley, said Mrs. Goydan apparently believed the e-mail messages could not be retrieved, but her husband was able to pull them off the computer and store them on a disk.

That raises some privacy concerns, such as what rights spouses have to each other's communications, said David Banisar, spokesman for the Electronic Privacy Information Center in Washington.

"If it's a shared computer, then the spouse has equal rights to get on it and share what's on it," Banisar said. But if the husband gained access to her e-mail on line, that could violate her privacy rights, similar to a husband tapping his wife's telephone. "It's still pretty undefined in the law," Banisar said.

The divorce papers do not say exactly how Goydan retrieved the messages. Goydan began saving his wife's e-mail every day after surprising her as she was printing out something on the computer when he came home from work early. When Goydan later switched on the computer, it told him there was something waiting to be printed, and he discovered a message to his wife from The Weasel.

The lawsuit claims Mrs. Goydan promised that day to end [Internet Affair] the relationship but later that night sent The Weasel a message that they had been caught. Weeks later, she messaged: "I just have to learn to be more careful. ... I want so badly to be with you that I am willing to chance it."

Reached by telephone at home Wednesday, Mrs. Goydan said, "You're kidding me" and hung up.

I have a question. Let's say in theroy that Avie Sex is cheating. Then what about masterbation? In theory your cheating on your signifigate other with another person online. Masterbating is cheating on them also only with yourself. I could be talking mumbo jumbo.

And therin lies the difficulty of the position.
Cheating IS Adultery to some people.
Perhaps you arent one of them.
An awful lot of people DO NOT make that distinction.

According to your stated stance... is "cheating" not "adulterous behavior"?

WOOT U GO GIRL!!!! Good Point Big Sis!

What point?
If the spouse or mate determines that masturbation is tantamount to cheating, then its cheating.
Your mate defines what is and is not cheating, adultery or adulterous behavior.
It is your responsibility to honor that.

"Should your husband/wife consider avatar sex in the same light as watching porn or writing an erotic fantasy and thereby discount any emotional links?" or "Should he/she consider this a sexual act between two people much like phone sex?"

Isis,
I think people don't hope to meet up with the porn actors or phone sex operators irl. But there is that possibility in an online world. I think that emotion can not be discounted as some might like.

What point?
If the spouse or mate determines that masturbation is tantamount to cheating, then its cheating.
Your mate defines what is and is not cheating, adultery or adulterous behavior.
It is your responsibility to honor that.

A two part question.

One

When the flame is gone, my wife will be gone, why fool ourselves into staying together? It is not good for either party to be in a relationship you don't want to be in.

Two

Cheating is having a romantic relationship with someone other than your partner. Having sex is just the icing on the cake. If you are having a 'virtual' romantic relationship whether it is on SL, chat rooms, or over the phone, then yes, I would consider it cheating.

Now, if you can openly tell your RL partner what you are doing and he/she truly does not
mind, then I guess you are safe!

- T -

Hold up a sign in Protest *Vibrator is my friend, like the Energizer Bunny..it keeps going and going.*

Candy, your straying from your own topic. Thats fine and all, but have you got your question answered? How do you feel about the answers so far?

The Poll results are as I expected.

Dr...sorry to be a snot, but are you not the person who stated that morality has no place in sl? I am just a bit confused. Afterall your opinion in another thread was that this is just a slice of pixel punnany (or something to the effect). You stated that none of this is real and we should not be offended by the goings on in a virtual environ, but now you state that it is real and spouses should be offended. Maybe you should expound on your own moral boundaries as they pertain to online worlds so that I can either understand you or discount your opinions as reactionary and wavering.

Sorry I just have a problem with those who rack themselves on the morality fence.