Ok, can someone just tell me what is wrong with me?

Well, I finally get back in-world after a longish break, and get a nice slap in the face already.

Before the break, I had the following conversation:
Me: I'd like to make (something) but I don't think it'd be interesting.
They: It sounds pretty good, I'd be interested.
Me: Sure, but I don't think it'd really work that well.
They: Oh, well, ok.

Then when I log back in, "they" have built their own (something) and it's attracted interest.

If "they" believed it would attract interest so strongly that they build they own, why did they cave after one line of resistance? Just to stop me?

sounds like they are a bit sleazy.

You indicated you thought it wouldn't work and took a "longish" break. Sounds like to me they thought you had abandoned the idea. They don't owe you anything.

Agreed. You sounded dismissive of your own idea. Meanwhile they said it sounded good and they'd be interested. Did you really think they'd just wait for you to come back and hope you were more interested in doing it then?

Could it be that you are a pessimist (it takes one to know one).

Of course, I would have done it before the break if they had not wussed out with "well, ok" when I offered even token argument. As it was it sounded to me like they weren't really that interested.

They didnt cave. They thought it was a good idea. They even said they wanted it. Two times you put the idea down. And you knocked back their expression of interest in it. The o well is an acknowledgement that you werent interested in their interest or in taking the idea any further. Something you indicated to them twice. You maybe didnt mean it this way but is the way it came across to them. So I not surprised that they made it when you didnt.

Yumi,

have you seen those commercials on TV advertising trying to get you to submit your inventions?

i would NEVER submit my invention to those people. you KNOW they are jumping on anything and creating it themselves. they are called "idea stealers"

i am totally an "idea person". i swear to you on my grandmothers grave that i invented the 'time ring' when i was a wee babe. someone heard me. they created it. but i KNOW it was my idea long before it was something created and sold in RL. timelines prove it.

DON'T TELL ANYONE your ideas in SL. people have alts. sometimes they are so brazen they don't even use and alt (such is the case here)

next time you have an idea, let it simmer on the backburner. but DO NOT discuss it inworld. ever.

i'm sorry this happened to you. it happened to me too. i ahve learned to showcase my creations after they are created.. never prior, never during. always after.

even then they are copied. that is not a 'friend'. it's the same as if they began dating your recent ex. bad bad bad. not okay. dump them.

*hugs*

See, I don't get that. You initiated this with your desire to building (something), they said it sounded interesting. You acted dismissive for whatever reason. They said "well, ok, then" and that was enough to stop you? It was your idea! If you wanted to do it, you shoulda done it. Why let them discourage you with a "well, ok, then?" It makes no logical sense to me.

Yumi,

nothing stopping you from creating it now, anyway. go for it! just do it. make it better than....

One could make a few different assumptions that from that conversation snippet. Perhaps the other person was simply accepting YOUR dismissal......doesn't mean their interest in the idea was diminished. So......believeing that you weren't going to follow through.....they decided to go ahead and give it a try.

He who builds it first, gets the recognition. But, that doesn't mean you're out of the loop....I have no idea what this thing is.....but most things I've seen in SL......well EVERYthing I've seen in SL has a few different versions by different innovative creators. So just do it....competition is healthy in a thriving economy. Who cares if they built one. Build yours. Not building it now....is just an excuse born of fear of not succeeding. (I know of what I speak, trust me....I've had so many ideas.....but I have a really hard time following through, and I'm sure it's cost me)

Just do it.

This a bit over the top. You put forward an idea and then you knock it down yourself and expect others to argue against you knocking it down. This something people can expect to some degree from spouses, parents and dearest friends, but I dont think we can expect this from just anyone.

Maybe this person assumed your "longish break" was going to be permanent and if they ever wanted this cool "something" that they'd been interested in, they'd have to do it themselves.

My comment wasn't dismissal of the idea. It was basically, "well, you say you're interested but talk is cheap, let's see if you'll defend that statement!". When they didn't I figured they were lying all along.

Why didn't I do it anyway? Because I'm not interested in building things that are going to get ignored, and the fact that this person had even tried to shut me down was a bad sign.

you told them you were not interested.... so they backed down... how were they to know you wanted them to show you more interest in the "thing".

If you want to make your own, do it, but this person did nothing wrong.

If you did not want someone to know, you should not have told anyone... you told someone, THEN acted as though you were not interested in it, so they took the ball and rolled with it.

*shrug*

I do not see where they shut you down...

they said they were interested, you said you were not... so "well ok" was their response....

I would take that as ok.. so you are not interested... they still are

They did? They said they were interested, you said you thought it wouldn't work, they said, basically, 'Fine, whatever you want'.

They weren't trying to 'shut you down' at any point in the conversation you've indicated.

They were. I said I thought it wouldn't work but I didn't say I didn't want to do it. In other words I wanted to do it but thought I couldn't because it wouldn't work. They then reversed their viewpoint, implicitly agreeing even though they had said they would be interested before.

They certainly didn't imply "whatever I want" because the tone should have clearly indicated I didn't want it not to work.

Alright, I'm no doctor (but I am a raging hypochondriac if that helps any) but based on this thread so far I'm willing to throw out this assessment in answer to the question posed. What's wrong with you? You're giving entirely too much responsibility for your actions, or lack thereof, to other people. You had the idea, you decided you didn't think it would work, you didn't do it. That's it. Leaving the other person out of this entirely, it all goes back to you. Even including them in this, you expected them to argue in favor of you doing it, while you were arguing against it. That rarely works out well, as you have discovered.

OK, so buy it and make it better. Then thank them for beta testing your idea while you were gone.

.

me: I hav an idea. heres how it goes. wat u think ???
they: kool =) i be relly interested in that
me: wateva !!! i think it sux
they: umm! ok

When Im "they" in these kinds of conversations I find them really difficult.

I think someone needs "praise" BEFORE they will take a step!! With that attitude it's a wonder you would make anything at all.

What I read in that paraphrased conversation is you tossed out an idea (with a slightly negative tone to it) and you did not recieve the raving encouragement you wanted so you dropped the idea. Seems to me that you did not really want to make whatever it was you were talking about...........but then get your feelings hurt when someone else (who expressed interest in it) did make it.

Get a grip Yumi.

Except that the other person was someone who could have been critical in making it work. (it's a place, not an item)

I didn't say I thought it sucked, I said I thought it wouldn't work (because people wouldn't be interested). I still liked it.

Yes but you still were expecting them to keep arguing in favor of it until they convinced you. People aren't usually going to do that for long; if you don't have faith in your own ideas, why should they?

I did have faith in it, I was just asking them to support it because thatvis what a genuinely interested person would do. They did not which means that their earlier claim that they were interested was tatamae (ie, just say it to be nice)