Worst/Best Second Life Pickup lines

He'll need to assess your slutability first.

I think I can prove that What does he need? Naked pictures of me eating chicken wings? I can do that!

I sent them some like that. He refuses to admit he received them

Umm, are those the ones I saw plastered on the Clubhouse walls the other day?

NPR? Try the 3 Stooges and Bugs Bunny.

OH Jezzy! You sound like the perfect woman.

lmao cuz swingin (on the tree swings) is one of my favorite things to do in sl so i woulda probably answered "why, yes i do!"
:/
lol

I've only seen two pictures on the wall, both, if I remember correctly, do not include me. I haven't been able to be at the hangout as often as I would like, though, so it is conceivable that my pictures might have been plastered on the wall.

Yes. Evaluations are free. In person consultation can be arranged. Some people build wonderfull things in SL. Others design beautiful clothing. People script, DJ, entertain, form bonds that last lifetimes. I try to convince otherwise normal women to send me nude or seminude pics so I can tell them whether they are sluts or not. How can you not LOVE Second Life!?

lol - Lexxi - I swear - God as my witness, I didn't get any nude pictures of you. You're messing with me, aren't you? Now I have to go desperately search my inventory.

/me shakes fist at heavens. DAMN YOU LL AND YOUR STUPID INVENTORY TRANSFER BUGS!!!

What if you already know you are a slut, what then? Maybe you can tell me to what degree or?

Well. . . . I had thought I was but he said I wasn't . . ..

My personal fave (my avvie has tattoos on her chest, which most SL tops show off more dramatically than I expected, but, well, outside of Caledon, I duncare):

random guy in clothing store, via IM: Nice tats.
me (baffled and browsing): Thanks, I made 'em myself.
random guy: I think more girls should wear tats on their t*ts, lol.
me (backing away and reaching for the TP button, not answering)
random guy in clothing store, apparently thinking that I had missed the point: It draws attention to them!

*quirks brow and TPs out*

Yet another, from a different clothing store, from a random guy in a tuxedo, of all things:

Him: You have a nice look. My friend's a lesbian Domme, would you like to meet her?

When I declined on the basis of my unfortunate heterosexuality, he offered himself as an alternative, of course. *facepalms* That one ended with the mute button. ^^

OMG Lexxi this is terrible news.
/me fumbles in her inventory for the sluttiest outfit she has and wears it with clear plastic heels

/me click

I must send this picture to him so I can SLV--get my SLut Verified

It's the cute kitten ears, Lexxi...they take off points from your Slut Quotient. A handicap all Nekos must bear, I suppose. You'll notice that Ann didn't make the cut, either.


But what I don't understand, Trout, is why the photos need to be nude shots? I mean, don't clothes make the slut? How do you distinguish between a slut and a lady if neither of them is wearing a stitch?

Methinks our biplane jockey may have an ulterior motive here...

Back to the original topic, she said, desperately yanking the wheel to the left.

Has anyone heard this one yet?
Hey, baby...I see you're Trout-certified. And I Match. Do you want sex now?

I failed miserably, actually. My full review was this:






Do I get pie with that?

Take two. And some panties.

Exactly - I base my evaluation on a scale of 1-10, with 10 being the sluttiest score and 1 being the least. I usually send a written evaluation explaining the score as well. I have to base it on the pictures received. I don't remember what I gave Lexxi exactly, but I apparently didn't get all the pictures she sent, so I may have to re-evaluate.

Before anyone get's their pixelated panties in a buch, this whole gag grew out of another thread talking about slutty clothing in SL. I opined that women should be sexually empowered and in touch with their desires and needs and that "slutty" has a number of negative connotations, but it doesn't have to. The next thing I knew, this hare-brained idea just popped out. "Women - send me your sluttiest pictures and I'll let you know where they fall on the spectrum of sluttyness. If you let me know where you want them to fall on that spectrum, I'll take that into consideration as well (it's not an exact science - no, wait, yes it is!)." Damned if some women didn't actually take me up on it, although some of the pictures were not even close to slutty (but some of them were ). Since then, it's been a running gag, and no, I have no intention of ever charging for it. It ranks right up there in the top 5 best ideas I have ever had in my entire life.

Stop bunching my panties! Brenda just gave them to me! Although, if the goal is to get sluttier, I'm not sure why I need panties....

You silly, silly fool. Get slutty pics sent to you AND make money is the ticket. Lots of money to be made from slutty. Ask Larry Flynt.

I never said they need to be nude. Send me the photos you want to have evaluated. Part of the evaluation takes into consideration which photos you choose to send. My methods for distinguishing are trade secrets, but if there is any confusion, I can always conduct an interview. Ann's were all very nice and not even close to nude, plus from talking to her, I know how she conducts herself. I stand by my Girl Next Door evaluation. She didn't fail, she fell somewhere else on the scale. There's no failing.

Anyone using the "Trout Certified" line for real will be my new hero, and geesh! I'm starting to feel like a perv. I had no idea I was going to have to come up with a legitimate set of criteria and an actual procedure for evaluation.

What do you mean, 'for real'? *eyes her sig*

Trout, I do hope you aren't handing out these certifications capriciously. They should have value to them. Or else they become just another empty title, sorta like MCSE Certified.

How high does this scale go up to?



*rated an 8 on the slutmeter*

~Official Trout Certified Slut~

Ok Trout, I don't have time to take special pics for an evaluation, but I CAN give you pics that are already in the forums! These are embedded in ads, but I note the ones you could look at:

1st & 3rd pics: /194/1a/209237/1.html
3rd pic: /194/93/207848/1.html


... and then of course there's always this, is there a category for 'antislut'?

/53/c1/26710/59.html#post1645215

/me sighs and decides to ask Carli for slut lessons