SL Forums: Whose Culture is it Anyway?

I agree wholeheartedly. I usually do control what and how I say things mainly by thinking carefully about what I want to say and how to say it and how I want it to be taken. About the only time I don't is when I really lose my temper. However, it is usually short lived and I regain control rather quickly. During those times I rarely say anything at all. I'd rather not say something I may regret later.

It's my experience that there are people on forums who will actually read into whatever you post - be it rational or not - colorful - or toned down, to include themselves or something to be offended by.

So most the time I just say 'what the hell - lets call a spade a spade' because either way the result will be the same.

I don't want to derail my own thread, but I wanted to respond to a couple of ideas above.

The feminists I know don't want to be treated like men, rather they don't want to be denied opportunities and power based solely on their gender. There is no reason whatsoever that an equally qualified woman and man doing the same job shouldn't be making the same wage - yet the wage gap persists.

Anyway, I'm not sure what being treated like a man as opposed to being treated like a woman really means anyway. I expect to be treated like a person - judged on my own merits, not a social sterotype. The only bias for gender treatment I have that I can think of is that I think straight men and lesbians should think I'm hawt.

If a man opens a door for me I walk through and say thank you. That's good manners. By the same token, if I see an elderly man standing on the bus, I will offer him my seat.

I'm not sure what you mean by chivalric code in this context. If you mean that we should deal honorably and protect the weak then I don't see how feminists have tried to destroy that. They (extremist nut jobs aside) don't want to be automatically labeled as weak cause they're women.

OK.. tired and brain is fried... hopefully this will make more sense tomorrow.

While it is true the other person's results may be the same, what is important is the results of what you say. Your words are a reflection of who and what you are. If you are always calling a spade a spade as you put it, it is a reflection of you. Is that who you really are? Is that how you want people to see you? Sometimes a spade isn't a spade. How do you feel when you find out you have called a spade a spade when in truth it is a diamond or heart? You don't need to answer those questions on the forum. Personally, I don't want to know the answers. The answers are for you and you alone to think about. To coin another phrase... you are what you sow/reap.

Makes perfect sense to me. If a man wants to be a gentleman and hold a door open for me, I'll gladly walk through it. If I have to open my own door, that's fine too. Although I admit I prefer for a man to behave like a gentleman and treat me like a lady, I can and do get down and dirty with them. lol But don't give me a lower wage on a job I can perform equally, if not better, than a man just because I am female. That is utter BS. We are all human and we are all equals regardless of sex, race, religion, creed or whatever. We are all still of the same species, Homo Sapiens.

While I don't necessarily disagree with you, this illustrates my point. I'm doubt Siggy would have a problem about being called a c*nt - provided it's wasn't an attack. So Siggy is following the Golden Rule. He is treating others as he expects to be treated.

Maybe we should try and address the idea of common courtesy. One of my assertions is that courtesy and obscenity are bound to one's culture. So there is no common courtesy.

Perhaps what you mean is that a thoughtful person in a multi-cultural space would try to err on the side of offending no one. The flip side of that is that a thoughtful person wouldn't expect the space to reflect only their culture, and wouldn't chide people from other cultures for not folowing theirs.

Don`t forget those lovely minded Hentai manga lovers that use very unfriendly japanese words and terms. Gesh this alone is sad. What is worse is many are under age kids doing these games. I saw this in a few clubs talking in japanese text.....I hate this! its really belittles the cluture and those that are japanese. Nice way to use the japanese languge as a tool in sl people.....

People who have met me from here can say 'I am pretty much here as I am in RL'

'To thine own self be true'

How do I want others to see me? I really don't care that much how they see me. So long as I'm true to myself, thats all that matters - people can like me or hate me based on who I am, and if they don't I won't be losing sleep over it thats for sure.

Yes it's a reflection on me - and so far as I can see , its a good one.

<3's Noh! ^3^

I didn't mean to imply that Siggy was doing anything other than treating others as he expects to be treated. As individuals we all draw our lines in different places based on our personal judgement. However, if we never question our own judgement, how do we know we are treating other as we want to be treated? It may be that on the surface Siggy (or someone else, using Siggy here since you brought him up) behaves as if being called a name doesn't bother him but what is he really feeling about it deep down? Regardless of how much we pretend or claim that words can't/don't hurt the truth is they can and do. We don't know what Siggy really feels, only he does. If being called a name didn't bother him (I'm not saying it does), why retialiate in kind? What purpose is there in doing so other than to try to make the other person feel just as badly as they have made you feel? Does it make you a better person for it? Do you really get any satisfaction from it and if so, what sort of person does that make you, in your own eyes (those deep down feelings we all try to hide from)?


Common courtesy... Courtesy is nothing more than politeness. Being polite in behavior or speaking. What is politeness? It is marked by or showing consideration for others, tact, and observance of accepted social usage. Politeness is common among all cultures. So, yes, I daresay common courtesy does exist. You will find people from all walks of life that want to be treated courteously, as an equal.






Yes. Although, it goes so much more deeper than that. It goes to the core of the continuance of the human race. If we keep sniping at each other sooner or later someone is going to get pissed off enough to hit that red button. If that happens, there won't be anything left for anyone. The cure for that begins with the individual. We can either learn now before it's too late, or we can continue our journey to hell in a handbasket. Personally, I'd rather not be in the handbasket. I'd rather see the human race finally come into it's own and be able to accept other cultures, etc because someday, we are going to need it. Who knows, we may need it before we ever travel the stars, if we ever get that far.

I don't exactly disagree with you, but I have to ask, do you really believe it is a good reflection of (not on) you? Are you really being true to yourself or are you being true to what you perceive as being yourself? What we think of ourselves isn't necessarily what we really are. We can convince ourselves that we will behave in such and such manner in a given situation, but, when comes down to it and the situation actually occurs, we find ourselves not doing what we believed we would do. Think about this. Do you really know yourself so well that you can predict exactly what you will do in any given situation and always be 100% correct? I'm not saying this to be mean or anything but if you answer that question yes then there is something wrong with that picture. No offense meant.

Yes I do.

I spent a good portion of my younger years trying to live in anothers shadow, and trying to be my older sibling - when I broke free of that and started being my own person my life was a lot smoother and happier.

As for what people DO in a situation and what they THINK they'd do - that's called 'a moment of truth'. In my life I've actually had several of these in extremely non-trivial situations, and they are the ones that matter.

Can I predict exactly what I'd always do in any situation? No. noone can - but think about this:

Can I type here and talk to you as I would in Real Life? can I say exactly here what I would say if speaking face to face? Can I convey my opinion as I would if we were in the same room?

Then yes - I can, and I do.

There is nothing on an internet forum that you could compare to a 'moment of truth'.

I am true to myself - I don't play an 'internet persona' - what you see here is exactly what you'll see in real life.

Ok maybe not EXACT - I do swear more in RL.

Siggy, I'm sorry to say that you seem to be missing something vital. It's not something that can be spelled out for you. No one can give you the answer. You have to find it yourself. I'm not bashing you. I'm simply saying there is something you have missed that is important to you and until you find it you won't understand what I'm saying.

Well sorry to say but I really don't care what an internet psychologist has to say about me.

I feel sorry for anyone who beleives you can divine the breadth of their soul based on a single post of a ludicrous question.

Here's the bottom line:

I'm very happy with myself - The folks that matter to me are happy with me. Anyone elses opinion, doubly so for voice in the internet aether simply doesn't matter in the slightest to me.. So feel sorry, and let me know how that works out for you

I'm a no-bullshit kinda guy with a no-bullshit kinda life. Nothing really to prove and noone to prove it to.

I've read a lot of horse crap and armchair philosophy on the forums, but this wins the prize for the stinkiest pile.

Time to take a big old swim in Lake You!

You say you don't care yet you keep replying. That speaks more than anything. It doesn't take a psychologist to see that. I've ready many of your posts so I am not basing what I said on just one. In fact, I'm not basing anything I have said on any of your posts. I can also see that I have touched a nerve. If you were so happy with yourself, you wouldn't have bothered to reply the first time. Have a nice life.

Well after awhile you use to people post remarks that are really sad in content. To each their own i guess....But they don`t and care put their rl and sl apart.

It's the worst one of all! I'm deeply offended, how dare you!

I'm a SciFi forums veteran. I've seen and dealt with alot worse.

They say they don't care but the fact remains painfully obvious that deep down they do. Otherwise they wouldn't do what they do. They want attention and do whatever they can to get it and that means they care.

Because you asked a question and I gave an answer. Why do you bother replying to anything? thats a bogus argument. Anyone who says anything or answers a question isn't happy with themselves.. puhlese.

And hardly touching a nerve I assure you.

Theres a difference between being happy with ones self and saying 'well thats a pile of horseshit'

That actually says a lot



Or I'm at work and bored outta my skull waiting to finish

After awhile in sl you find we have some pretty sad people only care of about hurting others here....on teh forums and in the game.......i just ignore these people and move on....
To get back on the issue here. this game has grown so big these days and many people come from around the world.... So expecting people to all get along really not in the cards as the say anymore.

But


but... but...

darn... pwnd v.v

Yes I referred to that ad as an example. Come visit Australia! You'll love it... but summer's just ended, so wait for next summer. Interesting to hear your impression of that ad.

BUT!

there's a common denominator.

Pie!


But, with all due respect, or lack thereof, if you dislike someone's post, you have 2 options:

Reply, and enter a debate.

Or just hit the mute option.

the second one works wonders, and saves a lot of bytes of text.

Or choose option one be prepared to become "LOL food"


And... for fuck's sake, its a forum!!! AN INTERNET FORUM!!! Expect lots of witty replies and awesome comebacks! ... and drama, lots of it.