Second Life without sex?

Jig, make us an instructional video.

Well, it's not a case of there being anything "wrong with it." But most people don't masturbate for the sake of it, or because they're bored: you have to want to do it, right?

What's more, what functions as stimulation is going to vary from person to person. I enjoying writing cybering stuff, but that's almost aside from the "sex" part of it: it's an exercise in writing and the imagination. But I don't frankly get very turned on by cybering. Maybe it's because what I've experienced hasn't been very good? I find that there's something rather mechanical about it, often.

Too, there is a paradox: I find cybering (or sex, for that matter) without emotional commitment utterly uninvolving and uninviting. At the same time, I am wary (for a variety of reasons) about emotional commitments in SL that would go deep enough that cybering would become a sort of logical "next step." Soooooo . . .

Sorry, that was a digression . . .

The KEY point is that not wanting to "do" sex in SL doesn't need to have anything to do with being uptight, or afraid that you'll go blind, or anything like that. It may just be that one is turned on by different things.

Do not let them fool you, some of those tinies can yiff with the best of them.

I've been here since 2005 and never really got into the Pixel Sex thing.

Sure, I've got some great friends on here, and many are female, but I just dont see it as a sex thing.

I guess I'm one of those people that need to actually TOUCH, TASTE, FEEL, SMELL, the person I'm with.

Typing stuff & clicking on animations & all just isn't a turn on.

Either that or years of looking at Porn online has left me jaded?

The US, for all it's so called sexual revolution of the 1960's is probably more prudish than the rest of the world.

I live in Nashville, a moderately sized southern city of well over half a million people. Within the last few years we acquired a nude statue in a prominent area of downtown. It is quite stylized and I find it uplifting, but hearing the hue and cry you would have thought someone was slaughtering children!

http://thefuntimesguide.com/photogallery/images/gallery/musica_statue_nashville.jpg

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Musica

I kept thinking, "Haven't any of you ever seen pictures of streets in ANY town in Europe?"

You were lucky to have met him after Feline civilized him.






Though, truthfully, he has always been a gentleman to all the ladies, as far as I know.

At first I was put off by your post, because I wasn't asking how to treat nymphomania.

Then I realized after a little thought that if I was serious about my question that I would do the things you suggested.

And the "grow up" comment is deserved.

Unfortunately, I asked for the thread to be closed while I was still upset, so if anyone else wants to get their cracks in, you better hurry before the doors close.

Three years and never got a willy
You might think that's really silly
Hold on,they cost too much!
I am better playing with my crutch.

I will stay alone and keep aloof
And don't you dare call me a poof
I will stay confined and on my tod
Until I am told "f**k off you sod.

Huh?? Sorry I was off doing homework What do you mean "Pace Smify"? Slow down? Hurry up? A rate of activity, progress, growth... performance... tempo (!!)...

Also I can't figure out why you wrote "signal" instead of "single"... Now tell me that isn't Freudian

heheheheh three rang resistence is futile! and i aint even the borg!

hehehe well maybe a J&G bed then

Lessie....I'm sorry about contributing to the "distraction." It will take forever to get it closed, btw.

I'm not part of the group you are addressing your question to, and not sure if I'm reading it correctly....maybe reading too much into it.....but you asked "How do you do it?" Refrain from getting emotionally involved, that is?

Are you asking "How" because you can't refrain? I mean, if you just want to go about refraining and feel strongly about it....you just do it, and there is no "how." But if you think you can't refrain and want advice on how to control that.....I don't think another person can tell you how to do that....you do that on your own, with your own vices.

I think those that get emotionally involved....might have a friends list full of people who tend to as well.....you tend to surround yourself with "like-minded".....so if you need to take a breather....might be hard to make those people understand enough to give you space, and not razz you about it. I had a huge problem during a break, when some would razz me almost every day, almost as if it were a challenge. If that's the case....you just hang around some other styles for a while.

There's nothing wrong with getting emotionally involved, as long as you keep your heart safe. Anyone who suggests that is a sign of weakness, is missing out on a lot of living. And there's nothing wrong with making an effort to avoid it.....then slipping up, and changing your mind....good grief....save all that self control stress for RL, and have some fun here.

Not really. It was an interesting thread - the parts that weren't trolling that is.

Thanks.

LOL

"pace" = "peace" in Latin, meaning "with due respect to" . . .

And I meant "signal," in the sense of "notable"

But it's kind of sweet that you read this so closely and carefully . . .

I've been in SL off and on since 2006 and never had "sex" or any romantic involvement, despite meeting several people (male and female) who have made the transition from SL friends list to RL friend.

As someone who's happily married in RL, I use the same yardstick for my my behaviour in SL as I do anywhere; I don't say or do anything which would need to be hidden from my wife.

This isn't a comment on anyone elses behaviour or marriage, just a comment on ours. I understand that other RL relationships are ambivalent to, or even encouraging of, online relationships. We're just definitely not that sophisticated!

How do I deal with the temptation of all those women who throw themselves at me day in day out? Truth is they don't.

Essentially I'm a deeply unattractive individual and obviously that does communicate in SL.

Also I'm 44 years old in RL and always create an avatar which reflects my age. In a world where everyone can be 28, a few grey hairs and an aging skin does tend to get people's backs up for some reason.. and not in a good way.

If I didn't know any better, I would think you slip these little "tests" into your posts on purpose, Scylla

Well, it's important to be sure that all of that "headdesking" isn't causing any permanent damage.

I put a pillow on my desk in your honor.

PS - Referencing previous posts that I lost track of earlier. Yes you can practice your paper on me and I promise to bite my tongue at the parts where you talk about how virtual representations of spankings are ruining Canadia.

PPS - I can talk reaaaallllyyyy slloooooowwwlyyyy sometimes.

I had the same problem with getting too involved and falling for people, even to the point of causing some RL issues. I've made that a non-issue now and still totally enjoy SL. For me the solution was two things..
1) Take the time to sort out which activities I was doing, or which situations I was in that were leading me to develop those romantic feelings for someone.
2) Give myself permission to be more selfish with people when it comes to drawing lines of safety for myself.
For me, it wasn't the sex or companionship that basically made me start falling for someone, it was the romance.. the deep things that make my heart spin. Intimate slow dances, cuddling, pillow talk, etc.. It's not always easy, but I've found that I actually *can* say something like "aww I'm sorry, I really would love to.. but things like that make my heart do crazy things, and I'm not ready to fall that hard for someone in here." Suprisingly, only the most emo of guys seem to have a real problem with that, and considering my weakness that's not really a bad thing (for me). I still have sex, even had a few exclusive lovers. Doesn't seem to be an issue for me as long as I adopt a little more of a roleplayer stance to it... as in feeding more off my partners reactions, and a little less off my own.

This somewhat mirrors my own experiences, and feelings.

For me it's the dancing. I love dancing in SL (sorry Jig!), but it's sooooo damned dangerous . . .

Best way to meet a guy? Join a group and whistle one up when you need one. No need to plonk around a flatscreen dance floor. Get down to the nittygritty and just summon a stud PS. Scylla, dont tell Mum.
I like to listen to Lovegame when I'm getting it on.

Yeah, I love the couples dancing part too.. A LOT, but it's affect on me is not something I can really handle all that well, therefore it's gotta be forbidden fruit.

LOL!!

Wasn't there a Sex in the City episode about "having sex like a man"???

Ohhhh MAMMA . . . !

Well, I've found one or two men, good friends, who enjoy dancing with me, and who also don't take advantage, or feel that dancing is just a step in the process of courtship. So, I CAN still dance more or less safely. I say more or less, because I find (as you may too) that the real danger when dancing is ME: I can sometimes get far more flirtatious than is really wise . . . or fair, for that matter, to my partner.

So much of this is really about self-control.

On the contrary, you set yourself up to fail, lying and bringing extraneous and erroneous personal accusations into the thread.

Pep (Your profile even explicitly invites drama! )

"I'll talk to almost anyone. I don't mind drama but I'm not here to hook up." (sic)