As You Like It - Men Becoming Women

No actually, meeting people is a by product of being in SL for me. I came in not knowing what it was, I'd never heard of it. I was just happy wandering about looking at the cool stuff. To be truthful, my socializing is done here. Most of my inworld time is still spent in solitary pursuits.

wow. you really do think that stuff in SL is cool?

SL is the last place I go to see cool!. Get yourself an XBox, gal!. Screw the gameplay, just enjoy the scenery!

<=== Yeah That - I am finding that I am also spending less and less time with people and more and more time creating stuff instead. I did not come here to fulfill a need to socialise either, i thought a virtual world have lots of potential to try things I could not do in RL, socialising is not one of those things I cannot do and so that was not the draw for me.

I do think that a guy should have a right to know who they are playing around with is really a woman if this is important to them, and thats where I think voice comes in and you can force their hand, problem solved.

If you ask me (and I know you didn't!) every guy should try to go around in SL with a sexy female avatar at least once and see how different people treat you, you learn a lot about how pathetic a lot of guys make themselves look. There is no shortage of weenies trying to get laid this is for sure.

I don't think Brenda is talking about just visuals, the sheer open-endedness, almost unlimited ability to do things that were never designed into the world are probably what she meant. Though I am sure she will correct me if wrong.
If you are not looking for a canned experience, Xbox just does not do it.

Trying to force people to do something they do not want to do is very uncool and can often backfire. It is this attitude that adds problems, not solves them.

I came into SL to create silly stuff and have fun and started to enjoy socializing more. But then I realized how pointless it all was and now I'm back to just creating.

Well you are a fool if you think every single guy who is running around with a female avatar is going to come clean when you ask them if they are really a dude in real life. So if you want to know for sure unfortunately you're going to have to force their hand if this is important to you.

You are 100% right. SL is like a theme park to me. i don't "live" in it, I just visit a couple of hours a week, to relax and have fun. I prefer to do things not possibkle for me in RL for whatever reason, form skydiving, helicopter flying, RP ing, whatever. I did the playing house bit, going to clubs and pubs, but I can do that in RL. Why do it in SL. That's just my approach, I don't expect anyone else to see it that way.

And how do you do that, for sure. Voice? It can be disguised. WebCam? Read Cyrano. Until you meet in the flesh, you will not be 100% sure.

Who said I expect that? Don't assume everyone sees things the way you do. I do not care who is behind the av, never have, so forcing people (as if I would even want to do that) to reveal something they do not want to for my own insecurities just becomes a none issue.
I *do* care about how they conduct themselves though around me, whatever their av looks like. If they act like an ass then I say good bye pretty quickly.

Yep.. SL is much more dynamic and unpredictable than a super realistic environment within a video game. Well in theory.. In practice I find SL is worryingly predictable!.

There's so many possibilties and yet I go into the sandboxes and see the usual freebies and half built clubs. I fly (stutter) over the mainland and see nothing but the usual badly made houses.

* sigh *

God, I'm starting to sound a manic depressive.

and with my last RL girlfriend I still wasn't sure even after sleeping with her.

Then you are not looking in the right places I suggest. There are *still* many, many wonderful builds out there. The world works much better except near upgrades than it ever has - at least from my experience.

I am wondering though what keeps you coming back if you feel this way about SL?

Well I agree and not only that but by forcing someone's hand you are potentially alienating an actual real life woman who just isn't comfortable with voice or who understands the absurdity of giving out personal information to complete strangers that they just met on Second Life without having any info about the guy beyond the visual of some horny looking avatar they just met. Thats what Im saying I don't think Second Life is a good place for trying to form any kind of tangible relationship. Good for kicks thats about it.

I'm a little ashamed to say it's the money.

Don't be. If you are making some it means you are contributing something somebody enjoys, nothing wrong with that. Creators need consumers, and consumers need creators.

Seriously? I would say that anyone who has the skills to make enough money here to stick it out even when they dislike SL this much, probably has the skills to earn even more money in RL. Have you considered a change? Perhaps you would find something in RL more satisfying?
At least try to understand that not everyone views SL in the same way, they are not deluded or fools for that (not saying you said this mind) they just are having a different experience from you.

Who said anything about forcing you to do anything? What we are talking about is forcing the guy parading around with a female avatar to be honest with you if you are not comfortable having internet sex with a man using a female avatar. If thats important to you. If not then thats great. Thats all I've said so don't get yourself all worked up.

Glad to see someone gets it.

You are projecting or reading something that is not there if you think I am worked up.
All I am saying is that forcing someone even in that circumstance to reveal RL information about themselves is wrong, if you cannot accept the illusion then don't get involved.

For me personally, if I dated a guy (see I reversed the situation to apply to me), no way would I be asking him to prove he was not a woman really, it just would not be important to me. If the illusion was convincing then that would be enough for me and so forcing him to voice just would not be an issue.

I agree also, having serious relationships in SL is a recipe for disaster for most people. For myself I have decided that is a road I do not want to travel.

Speaking of roads, I'm headed home. I'll be back in an hour or so. Don't touch that dial.

Yeah me too, see you on the otherside *fades*

Sorry I misunderstood what you were saying! And I thought you were a guy! Well i agree with you on that. But I guess my feeling is that a guy does sort of have a right to know if hes dealing with a woman or a dude if thats whats important to him. Not that I think its that big of a deal personally as long as they do a good job at it! But the other part of it for me is that SL is just a form of entertainment, Im not all about trying to actually hook up for any kind of satisfying sex. Fun yes, satisfying no! So the person's gender isn't something Im too worried about anyway, their are women being men, men being women, men being women being men being robots, you name it.