How have you been griefed?

Sow the wind, reap the whirlwind.

Pep (Why don't you start another thread overtly requesting examples of violent griefing against "females" in SL?)

I suggest you program douchebag and douchebaggery into a hotkey. It will make your life easier. And thank you for your opinion. I will go sob myself to sleep now, sniffling to the tune of, "Oh, Hypocrisy."

Clover is my submissive. Other than that, I am not sure as I have only read maybe 25% of this thread.

Leaving the posts with long words in for later, eh?

Pep (More than four letter words, or "cancer" and you are struggling, I suppose.)

I told him to shut it pages ago. Not that I have much influence over Pep, but I have none over anyone else but myself so will skate now, Scylls.

?????


When that is what I am specifically looking for, I will no doubt do so. Have you ever seen any evidence that I am squeamish about such things?

Don't worry about it, Scylla. Stuff happens.

You DID ask for examples. I had actually forgotten about the instance that I felt was true griefing, (the one I gave the link to above), because when you consider "griefing"....you think of some kind of attack with objects or some kind of attack with shenanigans or something.

I suppose that some examples are more of a mental abuse....not sure if you include those in a "griefing" definition or not.

LOL

Have fun, Laurin!

And just for no reason...

I find it odd that people would be amazed to find a dominatrix would like to see another suffer.


and Peewee, re: kindergarten teachers and my comments.
The trauma of your life is truly heart rending. I do not know how you could possibly have such a stable and resilient social life after being subjected to this horrible treatment.

Are you talking about the incident when a female alt attempted to seduce me with malice aforethought, Mickey? Yes, that would be griefing.

Pep (Until the tables were turned, eh?)

See, I knew somebody still loves me! And if I really was a douchebag, I would be strawberry scented

So you were hoping that Clover *would* get cancer when she had the scare?

Pep (You get more despicable with every post.)

To be honest -- and it is something of a bizarre omission, in a way -- the impact of "griefing" in the forums had never occurred to me. It is probably less relevant because most noobs are unlikely to find themselves here, although when they do, we know that they are frequently battered about a bit.

I think I would personally include harassment, stalking, and emotional abuse as forms of griefing, although they don't fit in with the 'classic" definition. Whether these are technically instances of griefing or no, they are things that I am very much interested in, and that the Survival Kit addresses as well. So it's all useful, Mickey.

And yeah. Stuff does happen. A lot.

You should read the thread that Mickey referenced then.

Pep (was stalked, harassed and emotionally abused - so he turned the tables. )

Treasure, you are, as always, a model of openness, sincerity, thoughtfulness, and compassion here. For me, you function as a kind of moral compass, and as an anchor. And I mean that very sincerely and seriously.

*hugs*

I have read it, actually. As well as that section of the undying thread that sponsored so much else that has been going on here.

I don't have access to all the "facts," nor to all of the effects, of what has happened in the past. I know that when Mickey or Key say that they experienced real emotional hurt, I believe them. For what it is worth, I also believe that you -- despite your denials -- have been "hurt" on these threads. I think that on one occasion, at least, I was responsible for an instance of that, and for that reason I apologized.

I don't want to judge people: I am neither inclined nor qualified to do so. But I am seeing an awful lot of real pain and hurt being inflicted and experienced here, just as I have from instances of griefing and harassment in world.

I just wish it would stop. Everyone here knows what they are doing. I don't understand why everyone keeps doing it anyway.

Here's you being a douchebag on Sept 21'st:

/327/85/252954/3655.html#post2569950

Here's Clover's post stating that there's no cancer on Oct 1'st:

/327/85/252954/3711.html#post2581124

I have not posted in the forums for a couple of days, yet in the last 24 hours alone Peewee has called my name 7 times.

I really wish he would do something about this infatuation. I have no interest in the control he seems to be yielding to me.

That's a good idea, but actually it's just the word of the day.

More embarrassed than 'hurt', Mickey. I mispelled something, used improper grammar, etc; probably was true at the moment. Things to quickly get over. I don't want to be dumped in a bucket and set aside as defending Pep. I am defending and trying desperately to explain, my own feelings on what happened. I don't have to search the posts in the undying thread to find out what the heck went on, I saw them as they arrived, I know exactly who said what, and when, no matter if anything was 'fixed for ya' or not.

2 things have struck me, this morning. One, Rhonda's post where she said she finds it odd that people would think it strange that a dominatrix would enjoy seeing someone suffer. (not a quote, cause I don't feel like going and looking for it, but words something to that effect). I'd not thought of that, totally outside my experience, and I am not qualified to even have an opinion. Except that perhaps to note that everyone posting on these boards is 'not' a dominatrix and thus, would not understand that sentiment.

Second, where Love mentioned Clover's RL cancer scare. I'd not thought of that either. However, I will point out that Clover is Rhonda's submissive and Rhonda knows Clover better than anyone. I'm not going to even presume to wonder what Clover thought of it all, that is Rhonda's business.

I don't see myself in the same category here, as Rizzy and Laurin. What is 'my' relationship to Pep? Cautiously civil, hoping I don't attract negative attention? Non-existent? I don't know, it's not important. It's the issue that bothers me, not the participants.

Why should anyone HAVE to "get along with" bullying behavior? That's like being told "he's a bully; just put up with the abuse; you'll eventually learn to like it". Yeah, that really works.



The problem is that it only works if he wants it to work. Hypothetically, if I told him that I took his Dragon "comments" personally and asked him to stop, I have no doubt that he would seize upon it even more, because he would then see it as some kind of weakness in me that he could exploit (not that he hasn't tried, and continues to do so ).

Every bully surrounds himself with a "cadre" of people that, though he may rib and pick at, he won't offend to any great degree, because they will back him up later.



Maybe it is because you are (or appear to be, anyway) defending the indefensible?

If you think you have the power to moderate Pep's behavior, why don't you try applying it for the ones who demonstrate that they are fed up with it? I have to admit I am dubious at the prospect, though.

I know you requested griefing instances that had a "sexual" connotation to them, if I understood the original post correctly. The second one I gave an example of, was not that.

The implications, which I interpreted as "threats"....were toward my business and finances. I was about to lose a house in RL...between jobs....and it appeared that SL might save me for a few months....which it did. Anything that transpired in SL that threatened that....would have been emotionally distressing.

It's not always about whether a person is weak, or frail, or sensitive.....generally, I'm not. But people come here for a number of reasons, and if a person Zeroes in on something in your persona that is a sensitive spot...and picks away at it....pushes the buttons relentlessly.....it most certainly is abuse or griefing or both.

As much as I don't want you to hand a safety packet to a new visitor to SL, that warns of such behavior, or implies that they might come across such behavior.....and might take away some of the original awe and wonderment.....I have seen enough people get emotionally strung out over some things....and carry the feelings back into RL....that I probably won't hound you about doing so. It does not always involve a "sexual" type situation though. It also involves men....I've seen some of them taken advantage of financially....also emotionally. And these did not seem to be weak men. Having a heart does not mean "weak."

Scylla....it won't stop. It's human nature. It will always be there, in some form. In SL there are very few consequences. Attach some consequences.

"having a heart does not mean 'weak'. I love that. And also, this is another point, the SL connection here. If I'd seen this whole exchange happen inworld, would I see it differently than I see it here? I have a tendency to somewhat attach RL to these forums. Even though people type and post as their SL personas. Clover's cancer scare was a rl scare, she told us it was. Were Rhonda's angry posts, and Pep's subsequent responses in RL or SL personas? Does it matter? My visceral response was an RL one. Admittedly.

You bet.



Why would I need to, when you provide such exemplary evidence with but the most meager of prompting? What more proof would anyone need?

Of course, it may not be the case that Dragons ARE better than humans, in general, just better than SOME humans, including those who relegate themselves through their behavior to being, well, "subhuman".

I don't put up with an abuse/bullying from Pep. You don't have to either. Nor do you have to freak out over it. There are numerous tools built directly into the forum and hopefully your social skill set.



I have written earlier in this thread Pep made a comment about my weight too. I answered, changed not a thing, and that was that.



I am on good terms with a number of people with a variety of backgrounds. The only thing I see myself defending here is my right to be friends with Pep without being called nasty names, have my intelligence insulted, or be presumed gullible.



Do you even read anything I write? I have the power to moderate my own behavior, and the right to my own opinion. I can't see how you can misconstrue that.