Gettiing Collared

Eep!

On this girl's screen, the font shows no smaller or larger than any other, but that must be some kind of graphical error. She'll just edit the post and change it to a smaller font, then. Sorry, Mistress.

Edit: Well, it was on font size 3 before ... on 2 it looks oddly small, but maybe that's a glitch on this girl's display? (Funny ... familiar speech patterns are taking over. )

To me it appears that the font size is the same but the spacing is different.

I was reading recently some books I found, written in the 60s and describing the fetish scene as it was then. Very irritating the way it is assumed that anything "different" in sexuality is necessarily "wrong". It's like people treating homosexuality as if it were a disease.

One can argue not that Dommes have something wrong with them, rather that they have something right with them. They are different due to a gift that others lack.

In Earlier, Less enlightened times Homosexuality and other Alternative sexual lifestyles WERE treated as a Disease, and the "Cures" that were administered for them in Many cases Were Very Draconian, Including Forcable Isolation, Sensory Depravation, Shock Therapy, Psychotropic Drugs, Lobotomies, and Chemical and Physical Castration (Though i Often wondered how effective Using Electrical Aversion Therapy on a masochist would actually be?). Illness was deduced where none was present, and Cures that were Not so much Cures, as Punishments were administered under Very shakey Medical grounds. It's one of the reasons that people today involved in Various alternative lifestyles tend to be distrustful of the Pop Diagnosese made about them, Usually based upon Erroneous assumptions made by the Researcher.

It's Taking people a Long time to accept that anything to do with Human behaviour, Sexual, or otherwise, Can be Neither described in Black and White terms, Nor Forced into a "One size fits all" Model of Normalcy. We are creatures of Infinite variety, Mentally, Physiclly, and Spiritually and Really, Acceptance is the Only reasonable option.

Angel.

I totally agree on that. The BDSM lifestyle can't be forced into a "One size fits all" model for exactly the same reason.

I know! What's more, in parts of the US this attitude still prevails; there are clinics that claim to treat and cure homosexuality.

Not only in the US. Even over here in the "Free Minded" Netherlands enough people have problems with homosexuality.... I only have to look out of the window of my house to see farm of those fine and good people.... Yuck.

Bah, even to think that homosexuality needs to be cured... ughh... or even consider it is an disease... more ughh...

Morwen.

"Lifestyle" - if you break it down, it is the STYLE in which one lives their LIFE.

As for the relationship between BDSM and Gor, there is a tenable one, because of some of the suggested bondage and "TPE" associated with both. The difference being in BDSM there is the implied Master/slave relationship that must exist for it to be a viable "TPE" .. whereas for a Gorean man, he does not have to own a specific girl in order to be considered a "Free Man" (aka "Dom"

As for the lifestyle aspect of Gor specifically.. Those who call themselves "lifestylers" are trying their best to apply the philosophy and ethos found within the series written by John Norman and live their lives based on some very basic tenets which are prevalent throughout the entire series.. concepts of Integrity, Respect, Responsibility. For a Gorean man, there is more to the lifestyle than just "bedroom kink" .. and the stories you see on here and other forums regarding the poor treatment and other disrespectful "play" online and off, are the worst form of "roleplayer" imaginable.. they hide behind a harsh, misogynistic attitude and disrespect all around them in order to make themselves feel the "big man" .. but those I know who live the ethos within our society are more honest, respectful, and responsible than any two non-"lifestylers" I know..

Angelique and Alex seem to be representing most of the rebuttal nicely.. I have enjoyed reading this thread mainly because of them.

I do not claim to have all the answers.. I can only say I know what I know, and learn more every day.. for Life is a journey, comprised of educating oneself and hopefully passing on that knowledge to others.

...So in summary I've based my agreement with his position on the basis of having spent over 20 years in the subculture, which I don't spend a lot of time stamping around aggrandising myself over - until I see johnny one-notes burbling away like they own the entire philosophy. Happily, when I was contributing to papers for the Metropolitan Police Community Unit, the House of Commons, and discussing these issues with the drafters of the UK Human Rights legeslation, I didn't put my ego first or indeed insist on credits - all of which I am sure you will decide is ammunition in your character assassination attempt, since that' preferable to actually listening to what someone else thinks.

You really can't win debates by writing the statement you'd love to respond to, then merrily carrying on as if the person you wish to smear, really had said that: it's poor form, it's antisocial, it belittles your intellect, and it suggests you are stuck in exactly the kind of ego-trap that the Dom Tox essay identifies. Note that the essay also identifies the difficulty of sufferers even realising that they are suffering, and the questionnaire also identifies the sheer stupidity of mistaking your personal ego, for some universal attribute of "dominance".

You've put a bunch of work into a refutation based on lack of credentials, without quite noticing that the thread around you has meanwhile made a couple of salient points on this topic: namely 1) you ain't got the credentials you declare necessary, either and 2) those who DO have the credentials have historically been a hell of a lot closer to the "D/S as mania" view than the "ooooh, it's only an alternative lifestyle" view. They want to Cure you: people like Ish and me understand both your successes and your failures - including the failure of railing against and dismissing as "pathetic" the people who are in fact on your side of the fence. The ones with the credentials you're asking for, want to feed you Prozac and use your life-story in their freak show collection. be careful what you wish for.

(the only academic I've talked to who has a rational insider's view of the whole movement - and I do mean the WHOLE movement, not just the irritatingly verbose and navel-contemplatory US offshoot - is Ted Polhemus. The rest - generally police psych profilers keen to maintain funding and reputation - just think of us as raw material. So why don't you wave your credentialist banner for their benefit, and feel the perfectly marvellous sense of slavery and humiliation that comes from being treated like a specially incontinent lab rat?)

Gummi, that is one of the best replies I have read in a long time. I bow to your skills with the pen (or keyboard as the case may be).

I did listen. In fact, I responded point by point to what you thought, including mentioning that the fictional parody that you directed us to while disingeniously passing it off as reality had nothing to do with Mistress and in no way described Her personality, not that you could know Her personality anyway since you don't know Her, really, but hey, why let a little thing like that stop you? Who needs the truth when you can "win" the argument by simultaneously poo-pooing credentials and yet slyly dropping your own out there ("20 years in the subculture," etc.), all the while completely failing to address anything I said at all, other than the little summary I added at the end?

Bravo!

You "win" the argument. That's what you really wanted, isn't it? This isn't about truth or understanding, right? It's about ignoring everything I say in favor of a venomous, deceptive responses. Well, congratulations. You "win."

You've sold a parody as a serious, real-world situation and a fictional psychosis as a real one.

You've sold credentials as simultaneously mattering or not mattering, depending on which situation is more advantageous to you at the time, and you've even sold the concept of psychosis itself as simultaneously valid and not valid, also depending on which situation is more advantageous to you at the time.

You've sold yourself as qualified to diagnose someone, even someone you don't actually know.

And now for the finale, you've bypassed everything I really said to focus on broadly accusing me of smearing you, since obviously disagreeing with you and attacking your argument is smearing, but it's not smearing at all when you accuse someone you don't even know of suffering from a psychosis that doesn't actually exist.

You're clearly playing to "win," and I can see that nothing I say is ever really going to penetrate your impregnable wall of non-acknowledgement. Personally, I'm not interested in that kind of back-and-forth, endless contest wherein the goal is not mutual understanding but simply victory, so I'm bowing out. You "win." Congratulations.

I've read extensively of these So-Called Cures. The end result in EVERY case is Not to Convert Homosexual desires into Heterosexual ones, But to Erase completely ALL sexual desires from the "Patient". A Hetero subjected to the same Cure would also In Effect, Become Neuter, They would not Become Gay. That isn't a "Cure" for Homosexuality, it's a destruction of ANY Normal sexuality at all.

Actually, this IS pretty far off topic.

The Original Post Was simply a concern that the Poster could be Forced into a Life in SL that they Did not want to Partake of
All Histrionics aside, I think we have Firmly established that they Cannot. Even if Game Mechanics allowed for some kind of "Permanant Binding" of the person, their own Mindset, and Choices were still Free, and they could simply Walk away.

Strangely days (Possibly Hours) after this Thread was started a similar one was Begun regarding the SL Vampire community (Someone Concerned because they believed their Friend had Become somehow Unwillingly Ensnared by SLs Nocturnal Residents), and Apart from a couple of Pages of Facetious comments about Permanantly developing a Taste for Hemoglobin Sundaes, there was Little or no Major Response. IRL there ARE Vampire Communities. being an Avid consumer (Should i use that word?) of Vampire Literature, and Lore i have seen and read Many Documentaries of the Real Life Blood Transfer Culture. The reason i Bring this up is the Seeming disproportionate Reactions to the two Lifestyles simply because One has extremely strong and traditional Links to Alternative Sexuality.
I have No Intention of Commenting on RL Vampirism, Pro, or Con, It just interests me that it is not Viewd in the same Vein (Unintentional Pun) as BD/SM, Nor does it Generate the same Vigerous Debate.

Question here;
Why do People Seem to Fear Sex That Much?

Angel.

a) disingenuously pass off as "reality" an account featuring Dr J. B. Strangetrousers? I'm sure you can run that past me and others again in a way that doesn't make us spontaneously giggle for days afterwards. it's your fault, now, that my partner thought I was jacking off in the rest-room, I was laughing so much.

b) not only is your world of sub/dom devoid of humour, you don't know allegory when you see it, either. Still, I'm sure when yo ugo and get the advice you claim you need from those marvellously qualified to evaluate your life, you will get some treatment for that too.

> you win

So you say: the way I see it, I've won nothing. It's more like you assiduously engineered it so you lost: that's what Subs tend to do.

Strictly for the record, I already knew you'd fall back on the "just kidding; you can't take a joke" defense. I saw it coming a mile away and was even tempted to predict it, although I imagine then you wouldn't have used it.

We both know full well what you really meant and how seriously you took what you said, and I doubt any savvy people who were watching were fooled, either. Nor is accusing me of being humorless going to work on anyone who really knows me; if anything, I'm kind of notorious in some circles for my smart-assed one-liners.

But as I said already, I know there's nothing to be gained from arguing with you about this. It's simply a pointless exercise, like the proverbial attempt at teaching a pig to sing.

Dearly Darlings,

I don't know what all the fuss is about. In dogs, mounting of same sex is nothing more that a dominance display. Very natural in pack behavior. If you don't like it growl ...(say NO.) If it does not stop, growl louder...(Abuse Report). Am I too old to understand the arguement?

Ever Yours,

Mrs. Showdog Tiger

Oh My!

I'm taking Show away....Don't yell at old ladies!

Abby

Dearly Darlings,

Abby says I'm nuts. I don't think so.

After breeding for 25 years I think I can spot and SOB when I see one. No means no. Otherwise it is assault.

Ever Yours,

Mrs. Showdog Tiger

Are you sure about this?
Even after reading this link?

Reviving this thread for a moment, I'm given to understand that someone has made a gag that re-rezzes itself the moment it's removed. Evidently the same trick could be applied to collars to make a collar that is effectively unremovable.

An object can't do *anything* once it's removed; it's in your inventory then.

It's possible that a gag could rez another gag on detach (scripts can react to being detached, though it's not reliable as they only have a very short space of time between detach and derezzing to do it in) but that gag would then have to ask permission to attach itself to you, or have you attach it manually. So an unremovable attachment is impossible.

Yes, I would guess it's a detach event thing. The question is whether the respawned item could inherit the permissions of the old one. I can only find out the creator and ask.

Even if they did - the wearer could just go to a no-script sandbox and remove it there. At worst, if a carried-in script was still active, the re-rezzed version could be removed a second time, and couldn't have an active script of its own.

Oh, I'm sure there is always some way out. The game is to make it hard rather than impossible. It's only RP after all.

But if it's only RP, why worry about the (rather awkward) reattach-on-detach business?

For such an object to work if detached several times in the row, it would have to contain a self-replication system and, well, we know why that's not too good now don't we.

No, newly-rezzed objects start off with no permissions, they don't get handed down.

Cos it's fun.

Hee hee, I'll fool Mistress. Oops, I can't.