Are some people really so stupid as to expect privacy in SL?

Mildly humorous, really.

Or even irascible?

Pep (Clever words are only clever if correctly spelled.)

Those systems in place that you refer to, are security orbs, and ban lines. In order to keep unwanted people out you have two choices. Wait until you know the name of the unwanted person (and hope there aren't too many) so you can ban them manually, which most often means they've already gone and invaded your private space in the first place, or pre-emptively ban everybody save those who you've specifically invited. The only effective means of ensuring everybody minds their own business is the latter choice, ban everybody. So you are saying that you're opposed to the only effective tools we have. Lovely.



I have a better idea. If you want unfettered access to private property go start up a commune in RL and find other like-minded people to enter your private quarters at any hour of the day or night without asking for an invite.

Er... I don't quite know how to break this to you RockAndRoll, but... I don't think RL is quite the same as SL...

Of course, I could be wrong, and it's just that I haven't yet figured out how to fly without landing in a nasty raspberry jam heap on the pavement

True, RL is not the same as SL. There are, however, certain basic measures of respect that we have an absolute right to expect no matter which life it is, and demanding that we allow totally unfettered access to everything that is ours, does not fall within those limitations. That is what I and others have been trying to tell the anti-ban-line crowd who insists that LL needs to eliminate them. Until they practice social engineering and get everybody on the entire grid to understand that one basic thing, the need for them shall remain.

Land Developers....I was serious about the niche here:

Designate a Sim with Security Mandatory - that way each person is assured that there will be no intruders, each and every parcel would be secure, and they are among people who have the same philosophies on privacy - totally unacceptable to cross property lines.

Not everyone can swing an entire sim for their security - offer it in parcels. Put some little water inlets between the parcels, so that if they are building, they can step outside of their parcel a bit.

Since they don't consider security orbs or ban lines an issue - then they would all get along fine, and would not be complaining about each others' security devices.

"Accidental Visitors" simply would not have any access in.

Good post, Ephraim: thanks for the insights.

I take your point about mixed-gender relationships, and agree, to a large extent. Personally, I hope that the opposite gender will become less "other" as our culture continues to develop better communication between the sexes, and culturally-conditioned differences fade. I am far from wishing for a sort of universal androgyny, but I don't think there is much chance of that happening anyway.

I don't have anything like the background in same-sex relationships and social dynamics to say more than that what you describe is sort of what I meant by "homosocial." An interesting question is how much if THIS is also "socially conditioned"?


Your precautions when dealing with women are laudable. I suspect, again, that many if not most of the problems that do develop in relationships occur because expectations and limits have not been clearly defined.

Um...

The instant that we get to tell you exactly what you can and can't do on YOUR land is the exact instant you get to tell everyone else what they can do on theirs.

Until then, you don't get a say.

If someone was there before you, tough luck. You knew the plot was there when you bought it.
If they bought it after, tough luck. You should have picked it up when you had the chance.

Regardless of all that... IT'S NOT YOUR LAND.

You don't get to fly over it, walk on it, dance around naked, dress like Charo and coochie coochie coo, breakdance, drive your car, ride your bike, hop on a pogo stick... nothing... without the owner's permission.

And to say or think that you SHOULD be allowed to or have the right to is the height of self-entitled assholery.

but there is a huge difference to exploring and being a general asshat. when i did rent on a private sim, the ban lines and orbs were not in use by us. when we got those who would tp in and proceed to "move in" so to speak. we would eject ban. then there are those who view your home spot as their personal sandbox, even when you give them lms to sandboxes the first time they have stopped by. then there are my personal favorites: the Lotharios/Lotharias. they are the ones who use your home to "seduce" their lover of the moment. the problem in that is, the seducee tps back in thinking the home belongs to the one who seduced them and starts a fight believing that you or your partner is the alt of said seducer. so while i maintain that yes banlines are ugly, and orbs are a nuisance until something better comes along, they are part of a necessary evil.

^^^^^^^^^^^this^^^^^^^^^^^

Oh, pooh. Those of you who want your privacy are entitled to it, but I think you are missing out on some great opportunities for fun.

The fun of meeting new friends, when someone nice wanders onto your land.

The fun of teaching a newcomer, when someone commits an honest mistake. For example, when they didn't know that the bed was your property, and not free for all to use.

The fun of baiting and booting an asshat, if the stranger should turn out to be one.

This is why I love the Mainland. This is why I'll never use banlines. If it were up to me alone, I'd never use security orbs either, but my partner occasionally likes to insure privacy.

In RL, well, whatever. Frankly, the 'play-hours' as opposed to the building hours I spend in SL are my holiday from the hard work I need to put into my relationship in RL.

That said, I won't even begin to list the reasons why a virtual relationship might be an extremely positive and fulfilling thing for others. Good, strong examples are not that common and it would not be for me to discuss them here anyway but there is plenty of evidence to show that such relationships exist.

Nevertheless, there is a tenuous aspect to online partnerships whereby servers may do a bunk, the internet connection or power supply may be cut or any number of RL considerations might arise, bringing about a temporary and unexplained break or the worst possible scenario of a total 'bereavement', which instills me with a good deal of reluctance on the matter.

All that aside, I don't have the space or the need in my life to go about building a virtual relationship unless it would have the obvious potential to amount to something more than what I already have in RL and that would be an excessively tall order to fill. Another thing is that I keep putting my foot in the sh!t with other folk when I'm online so it's a bit of a non-starter since quite a few residents seem to want to shoot me soon as they get close enough to take aim.

ETA:

I meant to say be careful what you wish for: the day men and women begin to understand one and other inside out is the day most women will want to get a little closer to their girlfriends and guys will be passing more than a few tender looks round the locker rooms of a Sunday morning after the game.

Agreed, on a personal level anyway. Never quite understood it myself . . . But I realize that's just me (and, apparently, you).


Fortunately for you, they all obviously have lousy aim.


LOL. Well, so be it ...

Again Mickey, I asked you - where and when did I insult you?

As others have already answered, ESL is English as a Second Language. I had no reason to think Pep was making it up. It isn't a dig, in any sense. It is either a fact or it is not.

I speak every language except English as my second language. See? I just insulted myself too, I guess.

Clarissa - you're welcome to message me in private. I'm not really sure what's going on here - and don't think that the thread is the place to work it out.

Not surprised this is your attitude, Mickey. (Or that you've twisted things - since when have you accomodated me? Lol. I don't recall even asking.)

I applied harsh labels to your thoughts? I think your words speak for themselves. But again I tried to address anything that particularly jumped out at me, at the time.

Your choice of words often IS somewhat nasty - you say you pay attention to tone. How about paying attention to your own? (Rhetorical question. Oh I guess that could be construed as asking you to change...except that I'm being sarcastic - you clearly think others should adapt to your wishes in SL and the forums but not vice versa.)

And now, I think I'll take Pep's lead and stay away from your posts. It's too bad. I don't really have that outlook on anyone else here so far. But you take arguments personally and keep them there, and life's too short to spend it around...oh what was the rest of that quote?

Ban lines and no fly = Trampoline!!!!


WEEEEEEEE!!!!

Ceka

Ignorance of some people is to be preferred.

I have a better idea. How about if you find yourself unable to come onto my land, regardless of your insistence that you should be able to wander anywhere you wish and further, that there's *nothing* you can do about it.

If the Lindens who are all wise think it is fit to put these options in the land tab, again, where is the controversy?

You pay X amount of dollars, you receive certain privileges and choices, and denying public access is one of those. Not everyone wants their living room to be a fairground.

I opened a 2nd thread to try and focus on the funnier side of things though. I hope people will post the funnier stories there, because there IS something funny (after the fact) about someone beating against the windows like a hummingbird.

Speaking of funny stories!!

I remember back in the days when i used to enjoy having my own place way up in the sky..One that i could go to and relax and get away from everyone in SL..4,000 meters up..

Well there was this one time when me and a friend decided to go to my house after dancing..We wanted to relax a bit..so we port there to find green chat coming from somewhere..all of a sudden i realize it is xcite emotes lol..

The man i was with said ..oh wow do you know these people..I said heck no!!!

so i pulled out my sweet lil Sebrouro machine guns then clicked the bed to stop all the animations and put the pose balls away and *DADADADADADASDADADADADADADADADADAD!!!!

Ceka Ceka i think they are gone now!!
ya but i love this sound these make.. And see the smoke looks real too!!!
*DADADADADADADADADADADADA!

Ya those are nice..

Ban lines..we no need no stinkink ban lines

and if they dont leave when requested then ban em a few seconds job and no inconvenience to anyone else....too simple for for some though apparently

ROFL.

so whats wrong with asking people you dont want to leave and if they dont banning em ??

I can see what problem people have with this option. The only ones who get locked out are genuine nuisances.