Why do men pay for sl sex when there're so many orgy rooms?

/me sniffles.
Thank you, Chris and Yosef.



True. Which is why Phil isn't entirely wrong. But, just above that, you also said:



Which is why Phil is mostly wrong. For one thing, pheromones have not been *proven* to have an emotional effect on humans, although many people believe this (me, for one). But in any case, imagination and the mind are the keys to sexual attraction. They must be...otherwise, what else would explain the size of the sex industry in SL, and online in general?

Fubs like Phil are the exception. Many, many more people, men and women, are turned on by a sexy avatar...if there is also an intelligent, sexy person behind it.

Well I admit my mind can affect me and I can get trembly when I'm with someone I am attracted to in SL,

I can be Iming them and no big deal ..

Then suddenly were together and alone, and the IMS are quiet - and there is a definite change. I've found myself swept away in the moment and cybering people I had no intention of being with.


But it isn't as much as the same thing happening IRL. Its more like a shadow of it.

Its as though your imagination projects those feelings onto you because of the receptive state you are in.

Someone on these boards once referred to the effect you have playing SL to hypnosis - And she had a point, perhaps it is a bit of self hypnosis.

I bet some people don't get the online effect at all.

I know some also don't get the effect ever In real life. I feel sorry for them.

It also depends on the scene you are involved with.

In the scenes that I have been more involved with in SL, men are not often involved, but it's not for want of them trying (often rather persistently!) to be involved. If an SL man is looking for a dominatrix, for example (which is not an uncommon thing to happen in SL), there's quite a bit of power the woman has over the man in that example, even if she is not, or does not become, his "Domme". It's kind of a supply and demand thing. The number of male submissives dwarfs the number of female Dommes in SL much as it does in RL, and so the power a Domme has at her hands is quite real, in terms of choosing potential partners. It's true that this is only one subculture in SL, but it's a biggish one, and one in which the men are often not the ones in control of anything much.

On a more fundamental level, I actually think that SL is very liberating and empowering to women because things like physical strength are irrelevant and there is no establishment glass ceiling or anything of the sort. Women excel in SL because we are free from these constraints. I've personally never felt like I was disempowered by SL -- sexually or otherwise -- but have often strongly felt the reverse.

No! He doesn't! The bastard.
/me sniffs.
And he never writes or returns my phone calls.

We are primarily visual in how we process information. We are drawn to what we find interesting or attractive, we all have different preferences. It's no different with SL. If you are in for a casual encounter, then the physical aspect may carry more weight. But even if you are involved deeper, the fact that your partner is appealing to you in whatever way visually, enhances the experience I think. Same may say it's shallow, but I just say it's human

For the record ... despite how he words his comments, Phil does not speak for all men; just himself.

Hun he forgot about you on the cab ride to the airport.

I know it hurts, but try and take it as a lesson and remember it the next time a guy flashes a smile and tries to get you into bed.

QFT

I'll second that motion!

Gee, I must be pixel ugly, this hasn't happened to me yet.



I'm glad you wrote "I've found" in there, as in, it has been your experience. Frankly, I've never imagined that all guys go around 'wanting' me because I am female in SL.

you have a drastically different experience than most everyone that I talk to.

but I agree its the other way around.... its not females you run into that think more highly of themselves than they merit...

*hands Phil a big shovel and some gumboots*

Fact: SL Sex is incredibly popular

So popular in fact that we are surrounded by it in so many places and the props and paraphenalia for pixel sex have been entirely created from scratch by the residents due to the Lindens not providing them (think male genitals and the lack of anything else sexual provided in the world by default).

Some of the reasons I think are: -

1) Good pixel skins, shapes, poses and clothing turn a lot of people on, and the imagination will fill in for some of the limitations of the avatars and how they look.

2) Well written romantic/erotic text can stir the imagination greatly.

3) People are less inhibited generally in SL than in RL, this itself can make interacting with people in a sexual way more stimulating.

4) People are still real people behind the pixels and their personalities can be very magnetic, attractive. I beleive this is one of the strongest factors. For example, you meet someone that you just fall for personality wise, and they may live across the world from you even if you are willing to share RL lives too - having SL intimacies then may not seem such a poor thing then compared to text-based chat rooms and the like from past years.

5) SL is a make believe fantasy world where you can anonymously (still mostly) do whatever it is you desire and not have to face the stigma of being judged for it by your peers - that too is incredibly attractive to most people here.

Personally I don't get either but my friends sim is next one of those free sex places.
Often we hear shouting moron shout, "who wants f*** me?"
What is sexy about that?
Only once did I go to escort and personally it didn't work for me.
I don't find "I got poseballs wanna hop on one?" very exciting.

I think Alicia has it right...pay for cybering...no SL drama

I think the whole thing turns on whether or not you're into casual sex. If you are, then SL has it a plenty. If it's not your thing, you are probably less likely to be turned on by mere pixels, even if it has a good skin.

exactly... SL sex can be very fun, but its hard to find someone of quality because most are like that. You're supposed to totally ignore the poseballs, they are tools to enhance the experience, you don't mention them or focus on them... you pretend your just doing the things. The people that enjoy SL Sex more are ones that know how to properly roleplay. The problem is that most people do not even know what RP is... even some of the ones that think they know...

I never cared for casual sex. I prefer intense, serious, determined sex. If your not pouring sweat and gasping for breath then I did something wrong.

There was nothing clumsy about it, Collette. How very stupid of you.

Funny, like in real life, most people in Second Life are generally ugly.

You think everybody would look like a model here.

Perhpas he was quite new. I already made allowances for the newer people.

Are you trying to commit social sucide? You just lost any shread of respect anyone had for you, Phil, and you really did not have that much to start with.

Then there are some very sad people around. But I disagree anyway. SL women do not have sexual power over men, any more than SL men have sexual power over women. I know that people hit on people - I get hit on - but it doesn't mean anything like the same thing as it would in RL. Animated drawings just don't have real sexual power.

That has little to do with it. Newbies are generally clumsier in their approach, but I've been propositioned by avs of all ages...generally when I'm doing nothing more provocative than shopping or exploring a new sim.



Really? There seems to be an awful lot of non-SL cartoon porn around, if that's the case.

QFT!! Hentai, for example.

I've no idea what a "fub" is, but it doesn't sound very compliumentary. The last part of your statement says a lot. It's real people who are the attraction, and not animated drawings. There isn't an avatar in SL, male or female, that is so attractive that a person *really* wants to have sex with it. Not one. But there are lots of people operating avatars who think their avatars are so attractive that members of the opposite sex naturally want to have sex with it. It's especially females who have that mentality. In RL, it would be true, but not in SL. In SL, there is no sexually attractive avatar, and no sexual power in avatars. Any sexual attraction that there is, is in the person behind the avatar.

To you. For some people, there is power.

I had a Mistress once. I swear, when I looked into her avatar eyes, I shivered more than once. During those moments, the presence of the person created the scene, but the animated drawings brought it home. And I'll tell you this: during those moments, she had *power*.