Ask Jake Anything

Dear Jake;

Why do people feed the trolls in the abortion threads? Wouldn't it be more intelligent to ignore them and let them go away? Can you help make them go away?

Thanks

Be advertrous, be daring, put on the Ritz!

Becuase the more food a troll has, the more ignorant they look and the more they become a charicature. Thus trolls are self defeating if you just have the patience to roll with it. Abortion, is of course, a controversial issue and contorversy is a breeding ground for trolls.

I like the abortion trolls because it is one place outside of AJA that I know I am always right Same with the Intellient design threads.

Yeah It might be more intelligent to ignore them, however, that would leave us with the movie title match game and count your numbers, both of which bore me. I like Troll baiting. Its like sportfishing for toothless sharks.

So while I might bebale to help them go away, I would be sad without them. Of course if they come in here and don't ask questions they will be spanked. One time I even ingnored a troll who came in here and trolled.

In general though, trolls are meant to test out patience and compassion, and if they frustrated you remember that there is tranquility even in a storm.

Too late, my 12 year old put on the Ritz before me!

Which leads me to another question.

Dear Jake,

Why do 12 year old's think that leaving 2 crackers in the box is better than eating the whole damn thing and just being done with it?

Respectfully submitted,
S. OFlynn

Jake! You really ARE a font of all knowledge! Glory be!

Which leads me to another question.

How did you get this way? Can this be learned? When I grow up I want to be just like you.

Cheers!

Because they are taught that it is rude to eat the last bit of soemthing. Or maybe they are hoping you will think you ate the previous twenty another time.

I suppose everyone is born with a gift for something-my gift was being a font of knowledge. I suppose it can be learned, I would tell you to get a thread and call it Ask Viv Anything, but really other people have tried.

Thank you for reading and posting questions though, and thanks to everyone else who reads and posts-you know who you are. Special thanks ot Zu Zu and Felicty-who administer punishment.

Remember be good, and if you can't be good, be careful.

I love mysteries.

To the person who sent me the e-mail: Yes. But only if you think that it will not strain the relationship. You should know what the limits are going in. At the very least, by this point, you shouldbe comfortable talking about it.



My standard disclaimer: if you send me an e-mail, you will get an answer. I will not, however post the original question or identify you unless you tell me its ok to do so in you PM or e-mail.

I like a world full of know it alls. It takes the burden off of me. But I saw this quote and figures I'd post it here and shamelessly bum this back up to the top in case anyone is in search of advice, wisdom or ramblining BS.

Thinking is more interesting than knowing, but less interesting than looking.

Goethe.

From my inbox:

Dear Jake,

My friends and I were debating Star Trek (Yes we are nerds!), and the time honored debate as to who is the best captain came up. I say Kirk, my girlfreind says Picard, for the sake of our relationship, please tell us this answer.

-Soon to be sleeping alone.


I love these questions-only in SL would this be a relationship breaker. I should say that i grew up with james tiberius kirk as the only enterprise captain, and as much as I like patric stewart, kirk remains the best captain of the enterprise. That being said, my favorite starship Captain was Janeway. She was tough, could hold her own as a badass, and brought a certain authoritative dignity to the part of captain. Kirk was an action hero, and Picard a Philospher. Janeway was a leader.

Spock was still the best science officer, and its a toss up for me between Bones and the Doctor. Dunno who my favorite engineer was.

From my inbox:

"Jake,

Why is the grid down? Why do we pay for access when LL keeps the grid down all weekend? Can I get a refund of my premium account fees?"

The grid is down because LL is fixing it. LL will tell you why the grid is down. Things like this happen in beta testing, and and really, platform, or game, SL is one long beta test we pay to play in. Don't get me wrong, I think SL is a good thing, and I like the fact that LL is continually improving the platforms and trying new things. One thing I love about SL is that it does evolve. But platform or game, SL is still not ready for full consumption by the public...its all potential with problems that still need working out. these problems cause the grid to be down, and the residents to be un happy.

You pay, in essence to beta test, and really you accept downtime as part of the deal, with no right of reimbursement. Its a typical online service agreement. We pay, but we have no guarantee of service. Period. That is the contract you entered into.

Personally I think LL has doen a wonderful job marketing: keep your product in beta, alsways test and upgrade, and never really committ to what your product is, just discuss its potential as a "platform."

Jake, why won't my shitty email provider fix my account access? Why do they think 2-3 business days is acceptable to fix a problem they created?

Additionally, am I missing my chance at making huge profits with no cash outlay, increasing my girth, and getting cheap prescription meds from Canada because I don't have access to my email? Who can I get recompense from for this?

Thanks,
GL

1. Well e-mail is easy-there are a plethora of e-mail providers. If your Shitty e-mail provider won't give you access for two days, gete another shitty e-mail provider. How may people actually have only one e-mail address? They don't think 2-3 days is a reasonable amount of time, however that is the amount of time they can get away with, so they do.

As far as missing your huge profits with no cash out lay, increasing your girth, and getting cheap prescription meds from canada, well send me your new e-mail address and I will happily forward the entire contents of my junk mail folder to you.

Dear All Knowning Jake:

What is the best way to make USD in SL with the least amount of work on my part?

What is address of the grid crashers house so I can send a friend to them to give my thoughts to them?

Becky

Well escorting is always good. Otherwise, building prefab housing or hosting events. But really the easiest way is to upgrad to a premium account and collect your stipend, and make yourself a surrealist avatar.

As for the grid crashers address, I'd tell you, but then I'd have to kill you. As a An SL communist, the grid crashers are all part of our plan fro grid-wide domination.

But But But, Jake, don't people usually frown on a child escorting? And I thought I was getting the premium stipend, wasnt I?

Oh another question (and no I am not looking for legal answer)

Why didnt my Bank pay my full Property Tax bill like they were suppose to?

Dear Jake,

Are the members of Perverted Justice and the Minutemen engaging in vigilantism?

-Kiamat Dusk

Jake do you know a script for a mailbox.. mailbox excepts notes from friends that stopped by that I missed for me to read when I return home to my land or someone that sells mail boxes like this. mailbox only accepts mail to property owner but will block junk mail also from unwanted deliveries... not sure if this concept has been asked before. I gues I 'm not sure if I'm able to even write notes, but thought I would ask

Yeshre

found one in a search, thanks any way Jake, for [ mail box]... Now I can send a letter to my baaaby... if shes not home. Later Yehsre

Yes they do, but its SL and everyone is an adult here. However I suggest you try other alternatives if you don't want trouble. I don't know if you are getting the premium stipend, do you havea premium account?

Finally your bank did not pay your property tax because that would be a conveience to you. If it werea convenience to you, they would have to charge a service charge. Paying property tax is not something that shows up in the service charge book, so the poor teller did not know what to do. The default status of a bank teller is "do nothing." Thus nothing was done. I am sure if you suggest a service charge, then your bank would pay the property taxes for you.

There is a rule here. No question get you spanked. You did not ask a question in this post, and thus you must be spanked. I am sure one of my resident spankers is floating around, and she it itching to use her paddle.

Also, since you answered your question in other ways. I am not going to answer it for you. However I am going to take your baby's mailbox number and send her love letters in your name. the Kickicker will be that each of these passionate missives will be addressed from you to Becky Tardis.

Jake, what is the square root of infinity?

I suppose technically yes, since a vigilante is one who takes law enforcement inot his own hands. Now technically the act of entering the US undocumented is not a criminal action, it isa civil violation. This is the ground used to elimate the term "illegal immigrant" from the national debate. However, a civli violation is still against the law, it is simply not criminal, and thus is subject to the enforcement power of the governement.

However, in all truth the minute men are watching and reporting border crossers, so perhaps they are not enforcing the law, and are not thus vigilantes. Yet the to maintain a vigil along the border.

I suppose it can be argued either way.

infinity.

Jake,

Which one of the mathmatical solutions to string theory is the correct one?