Ask Jake Anything

Jake, is Eboni calling me Evil or just evil? I think I can live with the latter.

Dear Jake, If the whitesox win the whole shabang does this ensure us that god loves us more on the southside?

I'm not Jake but I think God has found a new found love for the southside. South Lakeshore Drive currently makes North Lakeshore Drive look like a road in Gary IN, the Dan Ryan is finally being hooked up, and there is a Starbucks on Stoney Island with a drive through

You are a cubs fan, so we know your suffering can't get any better. I mean even the Red Sox won a world series. But really can it get any worse? I think not. So really you are at an absolute, and the current state of the white sox will not alter your suffering one iota.

Really though you need to address the hidden guilt you feel for being secretly proud the white sox are doing well.

Corporations are not evil. They are things. Like a spoon or a fork. The people that run a corporation might be evil, but the corporation itself is not. So the answer is that no working for Halliburton does not make you evil by proxy, however one must ask what kind of people get hired by evil people who run a corporation. Chances are if you work for Halliburton, you were evil to begin with-you had to be to get the job.

Well I would were less about what eboni calls you, and come to terms with the fact that you are Evil and evil. If you want help in dealing with your nature, I would suggest taking up the study of zen buddhism, so that you might understand that good and evil are just lables. Eboni is a buddhist so maybe she is not calling you evil at all and it s just a manifestation of your guilt.

And maybe you are just trying to reconcile that you are secretly a whitesox bandwagon fan with your cubs fan nature.

God does not love the white sox. They are doing well, true but this is not a manifestation of god's love. A manifestation of goes love will be the return of shoeless joe to baseball.


God does hate the NL west, thought.

There is no question here. You should know better eboni, after all you aren't Jake. Even correct, well reasoned and insightful answers in my thread get you spanked! Colette, break out the paddle and the spanking chair!

Dear jake, If the Whitesox and Cardnials go to the world series who will the Cubs fans cheer for, thier divisional nemesis or thier southside rivals?

I would not count the red sox out.

Dear Jake, are you a Bo Sox fan?

No I am a Padres Fan. But mostly I am just a baseball fan. Every now and then I have to acquiesce to the talent of players in that other league, but i will never accept that the American League plays baseball. Just a game that closely resembles baseball.


I shoudl qualify this. Last year was boston's year, and that was apparent from the all star break on. I was a joy and priviledge to watch the sox last year, and we rewarded with a spectacular display of championship baseball in the last for games of the ALCS (the first four games we were rewared with the Boston Marx Brothers playing baseball).

How can I live with myself? Go White Sox!

I am pleased to see you are accepting your fate. and the white Sox appreciate your efforts in that regard. As for how you live with yourself, you could always try and explin the pylons to Marshall, Will , Holly and Chaka.

what is the square root of

340952349752947092878947590824375081439794792845728759879272094702975209709270928570927509287209702910836249871236580134608923658457091832450198327501570298709760926908156813589173498174309187908437902437560970987520957023467092587235872037248724307295872479028334337209482360832624309871309154459824598234098793046956437435092875098560198570982437092847098120982609285609285604368743560124357109529845704894570219845098468726826028560231985608926243865284568524864580926786762789245780921437578946267627475098747578924378952487954789547894587547895555434095234975294709287894759082437508143979479284572875987927209470297520970927092857092750928720970291083624987123658013460892365845709183245019832750157029870976092690815681358917349817430918790843790243756097098752095702346709258723587203724872430729587247902872094823608326243098713091544598245982340987930469564374350928750985601985709824370928470981209826092856092856043687435601243571095298457048945702198450984687268260285602319856089262438652845685248645809267867627892457809214375789462676274750987475789243789524879547895478945875478955554340952349752947092878947590824375081439794792844572875987927209470297520970927092857092750928720970291083624987123658013460892365845709183245019832750157029870976092690815681358917349817430918790843790243756097098752095702346709258723587203724872430729587247902872094823608326243098713091544598245982340987930469564374350928750985601985709824370928470981209826092856092856043687435601243571095298457048945702198450984687268260285602319856089262438652845685248645809267867627892457809214375789462676274750987475789243789524879547895478945875478955554

?

Dear Jake,
If I drive half the distance to my workplace, I still have half the distance to travel.
If I drive half the remaining distance, I STILL have half of THAT distance to go!
Yet somehow, I still manage to get to work each morning, and I havent been fired for not turning up to work!

How is this possible?

Dear Jake,

Is God capable of making a stone so heavy that even he cannot lift it?

-Aimee

Dear Jake

Since when are there eight games in the ALCS?

Love,
Cori

the last three games.
Eh. YOur getting spanked cause your question was annoying. And you know better.

Dear Jake,

Why do some silk shirts smell like fish?

Dear Jake,

What's the meaning of life?

~einsman~

Oh, was that asked already?

42.

Yes it was.

one should not ask what the prupose of life is, but one should ask what their own purpose in life is.

I once ready it is every man's task in live to give birth to himself.

If you are to find purpose in your life i am certain it will be found more easily by looking in than looking out.

Did you wish to lock my computer up for days? Yeah right. If you want arithmetic use your own calcultaor. Other wise we are simply wasting out time with nubers so large as to be meaningless. I suppose somwhere there is a purpose to sorting square roots out of numbers like this other than mathematcial masturbation and keeping grant funding for black box porjects in cryptography and analysis. But I don't care. Come back with a better question. lol

How is it possible that the whole moon is contained in a drop of water?

If you would like however, I can call your payroll department at work and tell them that since philosophically you are never at work, they should not bother to pay you.



Sometimes the theoretical is rendered meaningless by the practical. What i never grasp is all these people trying to get the big picture, when they don't understand the small picture very well.

In order to know the forest, you must first meet the trees.

Um. I am a zen buddhist. There is no god to me, so the question is academic.

But really who would believe in a divine, omnipotent, transcendent deity who spends all his time trying to make rocks so heavy he can't lift?

Oh and for the record, world, I am not really Aimee's alt. I would never look as good in her panties as she does. Apparently some people out there have some issues with sillyness of such a claim. Also there are a lot of new players who might read the forums and be confused on this point. So, what ever attestations you read to the contrary, take it to heart that I am not aimee's alt.



Unless I really am and am just in denial about it. Does wearing a *preen* grater make me gay?