keeping it in SL....

I can love bacon sandwiches . . . but I don't want to marry one)

Pie (The Ancient Greeks had four words for "love", the French have none for "to love"

Rejoice Rha!

Pie (I'll have a drink and think of you tonight)

Ah, Rha...so glad your husband's surgery went well! I hope you were able to get a good night's sleep last night.

Try to get some rest this weekend, before your husband comes home.

thank you thank you, I am so very relieved (I over react way too much, always preparing for the worst, hoping for the best)


he is home, came home yesterday (was outpatient surgery) amazing he did not have any side effects from the anesthesia

Thank you all (and nope, still not sleeping well, damn allergies)

Nope, distance doesn't matter either, and you can still get chaos.

Rha - I am glad all turned out well with your husband. And I wanted to thank you for starting a fabulous thread! I learned a great deal from it.

thank you

and you are very welcome...


I too have learned a lot from this thread, and a lot of different views on how people use SL and why, and thankfully with no back biting, arguing, or "that's not right" stuff.

It is nice to see other people's views and to share one's own, without feeling like you are being judged (by you, I mean me)

*I even confuse myself*

Don't tell me 'nope'. It may not have worked for you or someone you know, but it works wonders for me and is a rule i have stuck by for a long time now. So what i said stands.

Okay, it works for you.

But in general, it is still "nope" - if you have the means and inclination for distance to not matter, then it doesn't matter. Sounds like lack of inclination on your part, and that is, of course, perfectly fine - it is your choice.

I don't think it is just a matter of means and inclination. If there are RL entanglements that would be impacted, then it is more a matter of weighing all the options. I have the means and have had the inclination, but that inclination was not quite strong enough to invoke the probable chaos in my current RL situation.

For those of us that keep our SL relationships all or totally out of RL, there are as many reasons as there are people doing so.

Big Ben married the Leaning Tower of Pisa yesterday.

They had the time and the inclination.

Pie (I know Big Ben is the bell not the clock, but it would spoil the joke)

What joke?

LOL! Pisa suffers from declination though, so I doubt it will last.

Yup. As usual, you talk a lot of sense Ms Jewell.

and the same can be said for those taking it out of SL to the real life side.

There are just as many reasons for people doing it as there are people doing so.



(and I am sure a lot deal with the chaos that is sure to ensue, I know I did and still am dealing with a lot of chaos, but was it worth it? HELL YA!)

Also, location in RL can play a very strong role in the reasonings. Ah, sometimes I regret my very out of the way location.

(To the stalkers who may or may not stalk me:You make my hard-to-visit location worthwhile and I thank you for giving it a purpose xD)

just a thought I thought to add,

Nicholas

oh, It sure can, not saying it doesn't.

For some though, it won't come into play, because they overcome whatever they need to, to be together in RL

some prefer to keep it strictly SL

and mainly that was what this thread was about, the how's and why's of keeping it in SL (or taking it to RL)

and I have learned a lot from this thread, opened my eyes to the ways people use SL, more so than I realized.

Haven't we all? And yes, i get your point and agree whole-heartedly, love will find a way. But i find the REAL problem with that is...is it really love? One of the hardest questions we can ever ask ourselves in my opinion, and one of the scariest to answer truthfully. But i think alot of the younglings, (said in full respect for I'm only 22 but still, maturity strikes me too), need to wonder if what they're after is JUST lust or affection and not actually a loving relationship. We ALL would LOVE it, im sure, if it were easy to find a loving relationship that LASTS...but, alas, love is far more complex to allow short periods of time to find it. Love takes an investment of life and of one's self, and time is a neccessary ingredient to making some. Often, might I add, it calls for large doses of time to even understand the recipe.

well I like to think it is love, real and whole.

being I met my husband in SL, then met him in RL, then married him in RL, yeah I like to think it is real.

and it is almost our 2 year anniversary of the RL marriage. (we never "married" in SL, but did partner in SL after meeting in RL)

did I have any doubts as to what I felt was real or not, nope, none. I knew within a week of meeting him in SL that this was my soulmate (and yes I believe in soulmates)

and well, he was pretty sure too, just took a couple weeks longer than it did me LOL

To give you an idea... we met in aug of 06 in SL, then met in RL in oct of 06, married in april 07

different countries and other complications as well, that we have overcome and are still overcoming

would I do it again, knowing what I know now, you bet!

I understand though, that my situation is not for everyone.

(oh, and neither of us were looking for love in SL, we both used it for the same reasons, to hang out, have fun with others, chill, etc, but not romance)

That's so sweet, and congradulations! :3

I'm glad you found each other and it sounds like your both very happy. Makes reading all those love stories worth while to find they still exist in RL. As for me, I've learned to stop looking for love and just live in life. If im meant to find it, It'll show. But yes, again, congrats! -insert party confettii and balloons here-

Nicholas

I firmly believe this. I think the more we search for it, the more elusive it becomes. Learn to love ourselves, be happy with life, and be open to true love. Only then, I think, do we have a chance of really finding our soulmate.

Just saying, Exactly my point


Nicholas

thanks nicholas

yep, if one looks, I find one tends to look too hard, want to much, and miss what is right in front of them

just live your life so you are happy, and not hurting anyone, and if it is meant to happen, it will

I find it can be found in many different ways, shapes, and feelings. I know, happiness is also a feeling, but there's a braod spectrum of the feeling happy, and different levels to feel it. For me, I am content with my life so far, things could be better, but at least they're not worse, y'know? I've found that by enjoying what you've got, and smiling often, you tend to see that all those silly things you worried about before like money or rent or even if that one special person will notice you've cut your hair a certain way all seem to fade into a sort of jumble of blurs. Because in the end, we all need to realize the only thing we should really focus on is living, and in life it's all experiances that define our lives. Bad, good, heart ache, heart take, lust, breaks, work, family, friends, and foes, money, clothes, morals and goals are all different for each and every person. Get people together and they're all reacting with one another, lives affecting lives, and this is how our little world works. A bunch of people with a bunch of priorities, all rubbing elbows with each other in hopes of doing so with the least ammount of friction. But, when it's all said and done, the only thing i wanna be able to say with all honesty is this: I lived while I was living my life, and I am content in how i lived it. It was a good life.

Nicholas