just ignore and let this one die

Well between your fingers and that magical device, you work wonders.

LOL, I just saw this as the opening post in a thread across the street:

http://www.sluniverse.com/php/vb/general-sl-discussion/23928-her-majesty-queen.html


****NOTE!!!! This is an old email joke; it came out years ago...it is not new.*****



From her majesty, the Queen

To the citizens of the United States of America
from Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II

In light of your failure in recent years to nominate competent candidates for President of the USA and thus to govern yourselves, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence, effective immediately. (You should look up 'revocation' in the Oxford English Dictionary.)

Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume monarchical duties over all states, commonwealths, and territories (except Alaska , which she does not fancy).

Your new Prime Minister, Gordon Brown , will appoint a Governor for America without the need for further elections.
Congress and the Senate will be disbanded. A questionnaire may be circulated next year to determine whether any of you noticed.

To aid in the transition to a British Crown dependency, the following rules are introduced with immediate effect:
-----------------------
1. The letter 'U' will be reinstated in words such as 'colour,'favour,' 'labour' and 'neighbour.' Likewise, you will learn to spell 'doughnut' without skipping half the letters, and the suffix '-ize' will be replaced by the suffix '-'ise.' Generally, you will be expected to raise your vocabulary to acceptable levels. (look up 'vocabulary').
------------------------
2. Using the same twenty-seven words interspersed with filler noises such as ''like' and 'you know' is an unacceptable and inefficient form of communication. There is no such thing as U.S .English. We will let Microsoft know on your behalf. The Microsoft spell-checker will be adjusted to take into account the reinstated letter 'u'' and the elimination of '-ize.'
-------------------
3. July 4th will no longer be celebrated as a holiday.
-----------------
4.You will learn to resolve personal issues without using guns, lawyers, or therapists. The fact that you need so many lawyers and therapists shows that you're not quite ready to be independent. Guns should only be used for shooting grouse. If you can't sort things out without suing someone or speaking to a therapist, then you're not ready to shoot grouse.
----------------------
5. Therefore, you will no longer be allowed to own or carry anything more dangerous than a vegetable peeler. Although a permit will be required if you wish to carry a vegetable peeler in public.
----------------------
6. All intersections will be replaced with roundabouts, and you will start driving on the left side with immediate effect. At the same time, you will go metric with immediate effect and without the benefit of conversion tables. Both roundabouts and metrication will help you understand the British sense of humour.
--------------------
7. The former USA will adopt UK prices on petrol (which you have been calling gasoline) of roughly $10/US gallon. Get used to it.
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8. You will learn to make real chips. Those things you call French fries are not real chips, and those things you insist on calling potato chips are properly called crisps. Real chips are thick cut, fried in animal fat, and dressed not with catsup but with vinegar.
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9. The cold, tasteless stuff you insist on calling beer is not actually beer at all. Henceforth, only proper British Bitter will be referred to as beer, and European brews of known and accepted provenance will be referred to as Lager. South African beer is also acceptable, as they are pound for pound the greatest sporting nation on earth and it can only be due to the beer. They were also part of the British Commonwealth - see what it did for them. American brands will be referred to as Near-Frozen Gnat's Urine, so that all can be sold without risk of further confusion.
---------------------
10. Hollywood will be required occasionally to cast English actors as good guys. Hollywood will also be required to cast English actors to play English characters. Watching Andie Macdowell attempt English dialogue in Four Weddings and a Funeral was an experience akin to having one's ears removed with a cheese grater.
---------------------
11. You will cease playing American football. There is only one kind of proper football; you call it soccer. Those of you brave enough will, in time, be allowed to play rugby (which has some similarities to American football, but does not involve stopping for a rest every twenty seconds or wearing full kevlar body armour like a bunch of nancies).
---------------------
12. Further, you will stop playing baseball. It is not reasonable to host an event called the World Series for a game which is not played outside of America . Since only 2.1% of you are aware there is a world beyond your borders, your error is understandable. You will learn cricket, and we will let you face the South Africans first to take the sting out of their deliveries.
--------------------
13. You must tell us who killed JFK. It's been driving us mad.
-----------------
14. An internal revenue agent (i.e. tax collector) from Her Majesty's Government will be with you shortly to ensure the acquisition of all monies due (backdated to 1776).
---------------
15. Daily Tea Time begins promptly at 4 p.m. with proper cups, with saucers, and never mugs, with high quality biscuits (cookies) and cakes; plus strawberries (with cream) when in season.

God Save the Queen

America. In the face of our common dangers, in this winter of our hardship, let us remember these timeless words. With hope and virtue, let us brave once more the icy currents, and endure what storms may come. Let it be said by our children's children that when we were tested we refused to let this journey end, that we did not turn back nor did we falter;

I missed the actual oath n stuff...was in the process of growing bacteria, <snip>

Well between your fingers and that magical device, you work wonders.

I'd comment .... but I think I won't...

I have nothing to add.. I just felt this needed to be preserved for posterity

I missed the actual oath n stuff...was in the process of growing bacteria

G+ve or G-ve? Or just yer generic back-of-the-fridge variety?

variety lol...only tested one today, the rest for next week's lesson. Today's was G+ve...and I gotta do a write up
Looked fabulous under the microscope though lol. Very pretty. Staphylococcus Epidermidis

(yes, I checked the spelling )

Psst! Lowercase 'e'. Genus is capitalised, specific name is lowercase. Thus Staphylococcus epidermidis. Don't get that wrong in your write-up. And don't sweat that write-up. Profs always like to hear why G+ve take up a crystal violet stain and why G-ve take up the counterstain. You can easily stretch that out to a few hundred words Peptidoglycan FTW!

(And the pedant in me is annoyed that the forum won't let me italicise or even underline the name...)

fixed lol. Thankyou. Can you tell it's all new to me yet?

Peptidoglycan FTW!

Bless you!

LOL, I just saw this as the opening post in a thread across the street:

http://www.sluniverse.com/php/vb/general-sl-discussion/23928-her-majesty-queen.html



God Save the Queen

The 'revocation' text is often wrongly attributed to John Cleese. For anyone interested, Snopes has the full history of it, including its many rewrites and additions:

http://www.snopes.com/politics/satire/revocation.asp

...he is a fantastic public speaker!

I'll admit it...I did start to tear up at one point.



The man can deliver a speech.

Had a little adventure relating to the Inauguration that sounds very small in the telling, but it took part of Friday, Saturday, and all of this morning...

The TV at work had a problem... the analog/digital conversion had left it behind, so I installed the digital cable box, but the TV still didn't work. After many calls and trying different things, including a different TV, I asked for a service call, and told the others that they'd have to find an alternative for watching the inauguration.

Someone said, "We could watch it on our laptops."
A second said, "But we should watch it on just a few laptops so we have more bandwidth."
A third said, "Can't you take one laptop and project on the screen up there?"

And duh! Why didn't I think of any of that? I'm supposed to be the IT girl, after all.

So, just in the nick of time I got it all together, added speakers and away we went.

There were no hiccoughs or interruptions in the feed, which was amazing. It was like watching big-screen TV.

But I have to say, and don't want to offend anyone, but seriously the saddest little boy in America has to be George Walker Bush. Did you see him sitting there? He MUST have been thinking, "I been elected twice, and nobody did any of this for me." He pretty much had the part of the of the bastard at the family reunion.

Well between your fingers and that magical device, you work wonders.

ooo we nearly at page 3500!

woooo Go Thread!!!

(and 2 more posts and I hit 4,300 posts ....this thread is catching up to me!)