Would you take back your "ex?"

Exactly WHAT are those paddles gunna used for

Wouldn't you like to know!

i think the bid is at 300...do i hear 400 anyone?

*raises paddle* 400

Yes rather...

WHAT!!! KATY IS HUMAN!!! OMG!!! ummm yes, very human indeed...

Well, maybe then

In general, it depends on who and when. When I go through a breakup, I have a hard time letting go, and I tend to drive the end so far into the gutter that there is no return... I've never deceived anyone I've dated, never mislead, and never lied, so when that is done to me I don't let the offender go on good terms, and there is no friendship. I think this is partly because I am too needy and easily hurt, but also it's how I protect myself. If I piss him off enough, he'll never come back and never hurt me again.

So I guess I'll have to say, if they turn around and make up for things before I sling too much mud, then there can be reconciliation.

As for my most recent ex, HELL FECKING NO!

Well... it's something i have to... um... show you

*raises paddle* 500 big ones for the lovely lady!

I'm exactly this way too, Stormy, and I am doing this now w/ my on-again/off-again ex. How has this worked for you? (not only am I needy, self-destructive and vengeful, I always want to know the ending first, lol) TY for reply...

As the Irish folksingers were once heard to say:

"and it's NO - NAY - NEVER... NO NAY NEVER NO MORE!"

One spin on the merry go round and it's a nickle a ride -- life is too short to make the same mistakes over and over again...

I'll be civil, I'll be a friend, but once the door slams on your ass there ain't no coming back.

Siggy.

Not considering the extreme reasons for breaking up i.e. abuse, an affair ...

It depends on how much I love the idiot. I'm moody though. I will break up with a puppy if I was irritated enough.

But YAY! for make-up sex!

It's just as bad either way. I think the older I get, the worse it is. Back in high school I could do the on again off again thing, but we're grown ups now, and life's a wasting. I tend to get alot more upset when some liar wastes my time. It also seems the older I get, the stranger the men I'm dating are.... the stranger the reasons for being shit on by them. Most recently I'm suddenly nothing because he doesn't want my kind of "lifestyle" of having to work fulltime and pay bills. It's too dull for him and he feels he will end up resenting me if he works that much and has to learn to drive. So he's chosen to keep his 38yr old butt right there with his mother who never raised him. The woman fussed at him for putting his clothes in the wash after wearing them only one day for freaking feck sake! Where he comes from, brushing my teeth twice a day and washing clothes alot more frequently makes me shallow and vain, not simply hygenic. Why in hell does the pool seem full of this kind of catch anymore? All the normal guys are already married.. seems that way anymore.

10 yrs ago, I might ask potential boyfriends what their college major was, what they like doing, and so on. Suddenly after all this my questions are much simpler. "Do you wear deodorant everyday? How often do you brush? Do you still live with your mom, and have you ever paid bills?" It's fecking pathetic!

Omg, sorry, I'm getting started again.

I think that it’s more difficult and takes longer to find a good relationship as you get older. As time passes, the realization that life is just too short to put up with someone who does things that make you perpetually unhappy begins to dawn on you. We become more cautious because living longer gives you more perspective on the differences between small annoyances and huge transgressions. It also gives you more insight into the consequences of your decisions.

It’s kind of like the difference between leaving someone because they left the toilet seat up one times to many or leaving them because the knocked you thorough a wall in a fit of rage. In one instance, you have to ask yourself “In the course of a lifetime, will it really matter if my butt touches the cold porcelain on the toilet seat in the dark once in awhile?”

In the other instance you need to ask yourself “How long will I live if this continues?”

As we live more life, we tend to both build boundaries and collect baggage. We also find ourselves in a position of having to consider people other than ourselves in our decisions, such as small children.

Back around to the question, would I take someone back someone who I had parted ways with?

Even when I was younger, I was not the type of person who blew a gasket over small annoyances like toothpaste or toilet seats. In general, if I actually left someone it was because they seriously crossed a boundary that either endangered someone I loved, my life, my financial stability or my sanity. So unless we parted ways because of extenuating circumstances such as age or geography, probably not.

If someone who left me wanted to come back I’d have to consider why they left and how I felt about it. I’d also ask myself why they left and why they wanted to come back. Again time is precious, why spend it with someone who does not genuinely value who you are and also want to be with you?

Past experience has taught me that the only way to find someone even close to the kind of person you would spend a life time with is to realistically know what you want, where your boundaries are and to understand that there are no perfect people in this world.

The people you love will disappoint you just by virtue of the fact that you love them and expect more from them. So know what you want and control your expectations after you find it.

Oh… and guys…. Rehearse repeating the following phrase “Yes Dear”.

I would take mine back in a heart beat. I'm stupid in love...love doesn't stop just because I'm not loved. I wish it were that simple, maybe I wouldn't hurt this bad.

There are a lot of "players" in SL, and I'm not really there shopping for someone for RL, but I have to ask the question in general--does anyone else get seriously hurt by their SL mate's behavior, decisions, or infidelity? When I said I was vengeful--that's an understatement. I'm on/off with a serial monogamist, and I'm like the 4th woman he's been with in the month I've known him--and he's already replaced me, while still *believing* he's stringing me along...and he *proposed* to all of us and used the same damn ring for all of us! Every week he's got a new woman on his profile! I think that is "endangering" my sanity, and others' sanity. What to do, what to do?

think theres a lot of wackos like this .. to some people theiy think other's hearts are just a game.

One of my friends was convinced to leave a rarely online man in favor of someoen who devoted a ton of time on her.

Once that guy got her for one night, he dumped her and moved on to his next "exclusive" relationship .. the next day as a matter of fact.

And people wonder why some prefer polyamorous situations online? *rolls eyes*

Noone was doubting your humanity my dear, i was merely emphasisng your comment to distract billy from bidding.

Nina that's true, when someone we love doesen't return it, it doesen't mean we stop loving them or that it hurts any less.

I guess it's like getting a tooth filled. By deciding not be with someone who cannot return your affections, your doing something that's good for you even when it hurts. Because your never going to be able to find that person who you can love and who will love you back if you are still holding onto someone who does not hold you in as high regard as you hold them.


In RL and SL I think that there are always going to be "players" who offer affection and promise of a relationship for a price. Whether the price for a one night stand is cyber or real sex, power or some other end goal they are hoping to achieve, it's a ultimately just a method to get what they want.

I think that it's easier for this to happen in a virtual relationship because of the anonymity. I mean it's not like anyone's going to show up at your front door or irrevocably ruin your reputation if you cyber and run is it?

So people like this will probably move from sex ball to sex ball, AV to AV and cyber their little brains out until they are bored stiff with it all.

SL can also open doors to RL relationships, as witnessed by a number of people that I have seen meet here and then go onto form a RL bond. I think that the same criteria and issues apply to both RL and SL for people looking for real relationships.

I think that the person who says to you in SL that they have a spouse they are happy with in RL but just want a little romance and cyber in SL is not a lot different than a co-worker who on a RL business trip tells you that their marriage is missing it's magic and they want to have a little romance and sex on the side but never plan on leaving their spouse. (I'm not comparing cyber and real sex here, but the criteria in the decision making process.)

Ultimately, you (the person being asked to hand over the prize) are the person who sets the boundaries. Does their wife/husband know they are looking for this? Yes? Well, OK then, lets jump on the bed/sex ball or Hell No! Are you Mad?

In RL or SL - know what you want and spend the time finding out what they want. I'm not saying that you'll never get hurt, I'm just saying that it might happen less often.

.

I am crushed; you are using me already!.....(is is fun? )

I think the potential for real abuse in online relationships is huge

In another onlime game I knew of a woman who, Using Alts, had simultaeneous Monogomous relationships with Many people. Was even Married in game to a few. All of them thought they were the only one.

She excused it all as role playing.

How she kept track of everything, I can only guess.

Lol her computer desk must have been full of little post its to help her rmember things.

That would make a great signature... lol

I'll throw in an extra $500 Lindens for Kat too! hehe

I dunno Billy I was going to do some naughty things to Kat with my tongue. I am not sure I could let her go for less than $600 lindens.

(don't ya love how we take inot account Kat's feelings on this? This thread is becoming morally reprehensible to the point of absurdity. Do not let anyof that distract from our genuine love of Kat and Willow and everyone else *sings kumbyyah*)

I LOVE KATYKIWI.... sue me