The newest thing I heard, its not good...

HARVEY: This is that secret facility?
JOHN: Yes.
HARVEY: So why do they have security cameras?
JOHN: They're secret security cameras.
HARVEY: You people are crazy.
FX: (gunshot)
JOHN: Shot in the chest and he just keeps arguing.
HARVEY: You gotta respect the man. My turn?
JOHN: Try not to kill anybody.

Dost thus have thou a mug of ale for me and me mate? For he has been pitched in battle for a fortnight and has a king's thirst for the frosty brew, dost thou might have for thus.

And I say, 'Hey, Lama, hey, how about a little something, you know, for the effort, you know.' And he says, 'Oh, uh, there won't be any money, but when you die, on your deathbed, you will receive total consciousness.' So I got that goin' for me, which is nice.

Useless inferior coprolitic components! I wouldn't electrocute my MOTHER with these!

Science fiction oooo, double feature. Dr. X could build a creature. See Androids fighting Brad and Janet. And Francis stars in Forbidden Planet who-o-o-o-o-o-o-oa at the late night double feature picture show, I wanna go o-o-o-o-o to the late night double feature picture show......who-o-o-o-o to the late night double feature picture show in the back roooow ah-o-o-o-o to the late night double feature picture show.

You don't have the sense God gave a donut, do you?

Open your eyes and look at me. No, I don't think I will kiss you, although you need kissing badly. That's what's wrong with you. You should be kissed, and often, and by someone who knows how.

The Mimosans had choreographed a bravura quantum maneuver that would allow the femtomachine to inject a partial clone of itself through the border and rotate all of its amplitude into the successful branch at the same time.

What makes you unhappy?

The fact that war criminals are never on the winning side.

If I had known it was harmless I would have killed it myself.

"Dear Pat Robertson,
"I know that you know that all press is good press, so I appreciate the shout-out. And you make God look like a big mean bully who kicks people when they are down, so I'm all over that action.
But when you say that Haiti has made a pact with me, it is totally humiliating. I may be evil incarnate, but I'm no welcher. The way you put it, making a deal with me leaves folks desperate and impoverished.
Sure, in the afterlife, but when I strike bargains with people, they first get something here on earth -- glamour, beauty, talent, wealth, fame, glory, a golden fiddle. Those Haitians have nothing, and I mean nothing. And that was before the earthquake. Haven't you seen "Crossroads"? Or "Damn Yankees"?
"If I had a thing going with Haiti, there'd be lots of banks, skyscrapers, SUVs, exclusive night clubs, Botox -- that kind of thing. An 80 percent poverty rate is so not my style. Nothing against it -- I'm just saying: Not how I roll.
"You're doing great work, Pat, and I don't want to clip your wings -- just, come on, you're making me look bad. And not the good kind of bad. Keep blaming God. That's working. But leave me out of it, please. Or we may need to renegotiate your own contract.
"Best, Satan"

L M A O <-- not an exaggeration.. at least in the figurative sense

In case of out-of-body experience, call 137-4597.

Mental Health hotline, please choose one of the following options.
if you are obsessive compulsive please press 1 repeatedly.

if you are codependent have someone pres 2 for you

if you are suffering from multiple personality disorder have one of your other personalities press 3, 4, 5, and 6

if you have an eating disorder press 7 anorexic should have a donut while waiting, bulimics should NOT use the receiver to induce vomiting

if you are sadist use someones head to press 8

if you are a masochist use your own head to press 9

if you are dyslexic press 969696

if you have amnesia press # then state your name address phone number, mothers maiden name, and what you were doing before lost your memory.

if you have short term memory loss or attention deficit disorder press *
if you have short term memory loss or attention deficit disorder press *
if you have short term memory loss or attention deficit disorder press *
if you have short term memory loss or attention deficit disorder press *

if you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a little voice in your head will tell you which button to press

if you are sex addict, wait until you're done then call the phone sex line, we're tired of listening to heavy breathing

if you are paranoid delusional we know who you are and what you want. Just stay on the line so we can trace the call.

if you depressed or suicidal, it doesn't matter which number you press. No one will answer.

agoraphobics will automatically be enrolled in our new group sessions in the park

if you are a megalomaniac you should stop by our office and apply for a helpline position.

When IT acts as a separate, stand-alone business, the rest of the enterprise will treat it as a vendor. Other than in dysfunctional, highly political environments, business executives don't trust vendors to the extent they trust each other.

Nor should they.

Thank you very much, Natalie!

We're a rock band, and it’s a great gig. Not just because we get to snort drugs off the Queen of England (we do), but because the only thing we are expected to do is make cool stuff.

You fell victim to one of the classic blunders! The first is never get involved in a land war in Asia. The second, only slightly less well known, is this: never go up against a ferret when larceny is on the line!

Thanks to all of you for the most brilliant thread EVER. I feel a strange sadness. Its like the death of "Mike" in "The Moon is a Harsh Mistress". Something magical and unrepeatable made of technology and heart lived here and will soon die.

I enjoyed it too. I still do in fact. Was it you, Sylvia, dropped the apologetic quote that went something like "I need more from this relationship than I'm prepared to invest"?

I couldn't find it again but it often raises a smile just thinking about it.

And maybe one last line from the immortal Mrs Doyle while I'm at it:

"Ah go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on, go on ...

"Go on, go on ...

"GO ON!!"

"Upgrading the Forums"
vs
"Nerfing the Forums"

https://blogs.secondlife.com/message/77107#77107

"During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act. " - George Orwell

Do you begin to see, then, what kind of world we are creating? It is the exact opposite of the stupid hedonistic Utopias that the old reformers imagined. A world of fear and treachery and torment, a world of trampling and being trampled upon, a world which will grow not less but more merciless as it refines itself. Progress in our world will be progress toward more pain.

Yup. That was my favorite line from the brilliant Strangers with Candy movie.

Excellent. I don't know how I manage to retain information like that but I'm glad I got to thank you. I think I must have seen the quote only once although I often browse this thread for random laughs and other stuff.

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