Do people just not like me?

talking at her didn't seem to work..so maybe letting her know she was not alone in her problems may not be as selfish as you are making it out to be..

My siblings and I played with daddy-longleg spiders when we were kids. The lakehouse was full of them.



Most spiders do not bother me too much as long as they do not want to come crawling on me.
YIKES !!!




THIS !!!!!

@Mickey - And sometimes when people continue to behave in a normal calm joking and talkative manner, the depressed have actually been known to get caught up in that and start to feel a bit of it.

Don't presume to know how she should or should not be dealt with. Almost all methods are valid for some situations and people but seldom ever valid for all.

I'm with you on this one. I'm just hoping the OP will see someone soon because she sounds like she needs to. A Dr is a good start because she mentioned she didn't want to see a psychiatrist.

Alaskans know this is for real, not just a theory. We get about 3-4 hours of almost sunlight in Dec-Jan, some regions get none. I like the summer when it never gets dark.

there is a disorder called SAD

Look it up, sounds like what you might suffer from

(I think that I had that, and now I live in a very sunny place year round, I no longer get the seasonal doldrums like I did)

the sunlamps help a lot

Edited to add, sorry for repeating, did not read all the posts when I put this one
SAD is a real disorder, and you might be suffering from it
(some call it the Winter Blahs or Winter Blues)

I was thinking the same thing
she seems to have abandoned this thread, and such is life on the internet and forums, the thread continues even when the op decides they are done with it.

Is that arachnophobia? Or is it just self-preservation?

I certainly wouldn't want to suffer a bite from either of those breeds.

I have never lived anywhere near a place poisonous spiders could be found but I still can't handle the harmless kind. Spiders jump in my neck of the woods but I've noticed they tend to jump away from me, more often than not, and I had to laugh at one little sad-ass that ended up in a ball on the terrace after finding himself on my knee for a split second recently. The reaction between us was was so extreme that I don't think he could pull himself together in time to land properly.

Interestingly, one or two of the sweetest, most memorable dreams I ever had featured spiders: they were dancing - snow white and silvery. Unfortunately I've also had one or two outright nightmares involving grossly exaggerated versions of the little bastards.

I wonder if phobia is even appropriate for these irrational fears we suffer? The suffix comes from the Ancient Greek 'phobos' meaning fear but I never can shake the notion that the condition is more about repulsion than fear. It's as if something buried deep in us not only finds a certain kind of situation or thing repugnant but that it is actually attracted at the same time - like magnets coming together with the same poles facing.

Certainly, in the case of my arachnopnobia, it seems that although spiders can't handle me any more than I can handle them, we seem to seek one another's company relentlessly.

A million cats don't live in your walls uninvited Pep. Well maybe in my house some day,since I plan to be the crazy cat lady on the block.

This will be my last time posting.

I've tried reaching out before thinking maybe just talking to someone would help, and it was about the same as this, people started talking to me, I made friends with etc. But eventually they just stopped talking to me. I couldn't figure out why untill alittle while later. They were only talking to me because they felt sorry for me, not because they wanted to be my friend. I guess they just got tired of me. That's why I'm not respinding to anyone, except the ones that keep on and on. And some people told me I'm better off dead, which I was offended by at the time but now I realize they were just being honest with me.

There's alot more happening to me than what I've experienced in SL and my world is crumbling. My doctor told me I probably have skin, and I'm already assured I do from the sign I have and what I've researched. And that is why I've been more than alittle needy for human contact and friends and love. I needed someone more than ever then, but I guess my neediness pushed everybody awa. But I don't matter to anyone. I've never had a true friend or a lover in my life, or a family that wasn't abusive or mean to me. Yet I see so many people around me, in RL and SL, that have all of that and makes me miserable to the point of not even wanting to get out of bed.

I know I'm a pathetic dramaqueen and about the only peace I will find now is in death and after tonight I'm going to be at peace.

Goodbye.

Why die? Stay alive and piss them off.

Unfortunately,I know how you feel. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder when I was 12 years old. Been taking medication ever since. One thing i have found though,it isn't really the people around me. It's me and my perception of them. So I tend to keep to myself and only have a few close one on one relationships that usually don't last very long because I tend to pull away from people after awhile if they don't act like "I" think they should act. I do realize this is entirely my problem though and just deal with it best I can.

Killing yourself is really not the answer though. I doubt your family wants to see you dead. Well here is a hug for you anyway,for what it is worth.*hug* I hope you get some help quick.

well I for one put out an invite to im me anytime you wanted to talk and I got no im's so I presumed you did not want to talk.
(or was it the 2 way street that made you not want to)

I do not want to be rude, or mean, but hon... it is a 2 way street, because we all need someone sometimes. So if you want someone to be your friend and be there to talk to when you need to bend an ear, then remember to be their friend too.

We all have issues, and illnesses and stuff we deal with everyday, some of us disclose some of it here, some don't.

I touched on my issues here a few times, and at the time I was a very confused mixed up person, and because everyone did not immediately jump to tell me they felt sorry or wish they could help, I stupidly assumed they all hated me, which just added to the general feeling I was having, which in turn pushed even more people away, or caused more to dislike me, because... well I was not very likable like that.

But now that I am getting back to normal, I can look back and see how I was and how being that way would and does push people away.

So... give yourself a chance.... and give others a chance...
after all
a stranger is a friend you have not met yet.

Don't ever think death is the answer... be a drama queen and be proud of being one... those who get to know you and like you will like you for being you.
(I know all about being a drama queen, been there done that, still do... hell I wrote the book on it... but rest assured... people will still like you, if you are you)

I still extend the invite to chat if you ever want to, might surprise us both... who know until we try right?

I often wondered if that was my problem too, cuz what you described sounds a lot like me.

(but now I see it was other things, and I am starting to get back to normal,... well normal as I can be LOL)

9/11/2001

To most people this set of numbers bring visions of death and horror. It has a much different significance to me. After years of decreasing health ending in loosing my job and not being able to work for a year, loosing my life savings, bankruptcy, no insurance, laying on the couch in constant pain as I lay there and watched my daughter leave for school in the morning and come home in the afternoon only for her to be disappointed one more time as I had to tell her I could not play. I finally gathered the strength to get up, get in the car and drive to Seneca Rocks, WV on September the 10th, 2001. A place that once held so much magic for me. A place I used to climb increasingly difficult routes. A place that was going to be the last place I saw on earth. After a sleepless night and with the end of the pain in sight I made it to the parking lot at the base that sunny summer morning that brought so much death. I found the parking lot filled with people standing around cars and talking with these strange expressions on their faces. The shock of what had happened and what was happening was enough to jolt me out of my death trance.

I drove back home................................

It has not been easy, the pain did not magically disappear and I was still broke. It was months before I could really play with my daughter again. It was 2 more years before I was able to return a part time job. SL has helped so much, yes at first it was so nice to be able to talk and interact with people in a body that was not bent and broken. But the true healing magic was when I discovered scripting and learned so much and eventually was able to help other people learn. I was able to regain so much self confidence I had lost and am still answering questions here. I am helping people learn more importantly that they can do so much more then they thought possible.

9/11/2001 was the day that I lived because so many died. It has not been easy but I have not regretted one moment since then and I have seen and experienced so much since then. So many wonderful moments with my daughter that I would have lost, so much pain she would have lived with for the rest of her life if I had not come back.

No matter what else happens in my life I will never ever throw it away, not with the price so many paid for me to still have it.

Cassandra very few people know this story. I am not really comfortable telling the whole world as I just did. I do not want sympathy as I need none. For the price of me writing these words I want you to at least read them and think about what I have said.

I have the opposite, something like Hiroshima disease w/o the atom bomb, hyperthyroid.
It's annoying and burns me out. I've been nuked 3 times, and it still comes back.
I also have GAD and clinically depressed, no up or downs, just nill. And have been on and off again enabled agoraphobic.
I know a lot of ppls, but don't keep a lot of friends, I did the 1st yr but, it was all more about them then me enjoying SL. I find ppls don't like me, I don't even have to do anything, not doing anything, leave ppls alone, not down for all the BS. And I pretty much don't care, am happy to be here, play w/ my inventory, lands, lurk.

Some one asked me what I was doing in SL the other week and I said, "The same thing everyone else is doing!"

I thought to IM the OP then they got too red flaggy for me to deal w/.

I met OP again today. She came to my sim and we had a talk. I won't say what we discussed but I am going to keep talking to her. Mickey thank you for the note you sent. I welcome any other suggests inworld. I would be interested in hearing from folks that are agoraphobic.

I will say this, she is very respectful young lady going through pain.

I like to keep the dialogue going, so those that like to post things with an edge, try to be a little a gentlier. Those that have shown an outpouring of concern keep it coming.

Cassandra,

I hope you can ignore some of the snide comments that were made here in this thread. There are plenty of good people in this world but we tend to overlook those sometimes. Any comments that you are just trying to get attention and/or a flamer comes from pure ignorance rather than hate. Too many are trying to play psychiatrist also, but they are just helping the best they know how.

I am bipolar and had agoraphobia for about a year. SL saved my ass then, otherwise I'd have been very lonely. Currently I facilitate a bipolar/depression support group in RL.

You're not logged in now or I would try to IM you. I'll be off and on all day on Monday, so look for me on Monday. I'm sure right now that you probably want someone to just listen to you and I'd be happy to do so.

I hope you'll be on Monday. Big Hugs

@Bradley,

I sent you an im inworld.

sable

Sable, I'm glad you were able to contact her directly.

Cassandra, 3,440 hits on this thread indicate that, despite a few snide comments, many people DO care, even though they have never met you.

Most people have felt similar feelings of pain and desperation at some point in their lives, and so your expressing those feelings brings out sympathy and concern in others.

I hear you saying, that is not the same as friendship, and you are right, but... friends can sometimes grow from tiny beginnings. I hope you will look again at those who have responded from their hearts.

I'm really wondering why is all of that happening to you.
Why you expect people to have better opinion about you then you have about them?
Why you think you are better then the others?
Why you don't respect others?
Why you don't respect yourself?

Hugs to you Jesse - that took guts, not only on 9/11/2001, but telling it here.

I chatted with Cassandra for a bit tonight. I forgot to ask if it was ok if I shared anything with the group so I'll just say that we had a pleasant and mostly positive conversation.

That is wonderful to hear Bradley.

Cassandra, Please hang in there. It is always darkest before the light shines through. You are a valuable human being no matter how down you may feel at the moment. Just think, when you pull through this darkness how many others you can help down the line.

Please try to hang in there. Your worth in this world is something you don't fully realize yet.

Sending good energy your way and lots of love. Sincerely.

Good to hear.

Jesse, How brave of you to share this with the forum. Thanks from the bottom of my heart for being a living example of all the reasons why no one should ever give up.

Cassandra, you can make it. Just hang on one more day at the very least. Live day to day, hour to hour, minute by minute. If you didn't have a good heart deep down, you would not feel so much pain. This world needs all the good hearts out there. Bless.

I also im'd her and told her I am here if she needs me, she was not very talkative, so I think either she was speaking with others or was choosing to not talk to me. Whichever it was, I am here if she needs to bend and ear.

If not, then that is her choice (it seems she has already got the chance to talk to some folks, so that is a good sign)