Ask Jake Anything

You touch yourself at night?

While I have much in the way of sympathy..rules are rules..and you now now up to like four spankings..

It depends on how god the porno is. Since we all know I am an SL monk lol

Well Rice, read your own post and tell me what wrong with it..in a quaestion format.

Expectations are illusions, accept what is, and not what you want to be. All of live is a matte of seeing that whihc is really around you.

No family guy answer, and you did not ask a question. Zuzu will spank you now.

Because english isa convoluted language.

1. Why does your gynecologist leave the room when you undress?

2. If a person owns a piece of land, do they own it all the way down to the center of the earth?

3. Why does mineral water that has trickled through mountains for centuries
have a use by date?

4. Who was the first person to look at a cow and say "I think i'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink what comes out"?

5. If corn oil is made from corn and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, what is baby oil made from?

They make plastic owls to scare pidgeons away.. ..try putting one on top of the a/c unit. Otherwise, some anti pidgeion barbed wire works too.. check out a home or lawn and garden center in your area.

Owls scare pidgeons? If this works you may have saved my sanity and the lives of two pidgeons, Thank you.

1. I don't have a gynecologist, so he does not leave the room when I undress.

2. Possibly. Ownership of land represents a bundle of rights and a person may own some or all of those rights..this is negotiated at the time of sale. Frequently things like mineral rights are withheld, and in some cities epmty air above the land is transferable.

3. because plstic containers are limited and subject to damage from things like sunlight, so the use by date is the date they can gurantee purity until. If you drink water from a mountain spring and get sick, thats your problem, if you drink Aquafina and get sick, you sue coca cola (or pepsi).

4. I don't know. But he was less bold (or hungry) than the person who decided lobster would be good to eat. Or the first person to figure out how to prepare Fugu.

5. baby oil is largely mineral oil, with some additives for fragrance. A more natural bay oil might be aloe and vitamin e. Sometimes a product is named for its use and not its composition. Motor oil is not made of motors.

Yes, owls are predator of pidgeons.

*wiggles*

Are you two still in denial about this flirting?

HMMM I take that as a question..and the answer is yes.

good question. what flirting?

Why am I addicted to the the drama? Just cant seem to let certain things or certain people go. My monster is so large. If it wasnt for bad luck, there'd be no luck for R.

Funadmentally, at its core, being unable to let go is a choice. You decide you want them to remain in your life. Maybe thats not the decision you think you make, maybe the decision you think you make is that you want to be a nice person, a decent person, a better person than they are. Or maybe you think, "I need to prove I am stronger."

You leave a gap in the armour, a stray IM and and you open the door to a flood of emotions..remeber the good times? God yes..eveything about a relationship looks good looking back. The fun you had all those cute adorable moments, the romance.

The fact that he lied about who is, had sex with your best freind, in your bed, and laughed that he only strings you along when there is noone else availble escapes you. You don't think about him telling his freinds "yeah I keep her here because she pays for everything dude." maybe you never heard him call you his "war pig"-you know the slightly bigger girl he likes to fuck when no hotter chicks will have him? Or maybe you were is psycho sex freak, or his anorexic love doll-there are hundreds of ways a taker uses to describe what he is taking.

All the negative stuff flows out in the fantasy of the things that were perfect. The borken promises, house spent hearing him say he is not able to love, that it is him and not you, or that she was meaningless are forgotten. the hearache, jealousy of wondering where he was and who his was with slip away. Or maybe you have forgotten the the feel the first time his hand hit your cheek? this shit did not happen once..it happend all the time. And yet you have forgotten how he failed to treat you like a woman, a person. He denied you perhaps, only the basic deceny of honesty and compassion.

and of course he needs his sugar momma back, he's lonley..it takes time to build a psychoitc realtionship..you have to find the right girl and spend time playing her insecurites like a harp. this requires effort, timing.. Its much easier to IM the ex and and offer an apology, to say you are wrong and that you are not worthy of her..the lies fucking flow then..you are in a zone and ready to write poetry. You know, no matter what you did to her, with only a little effort you have her. So he is sweet, and charming, and goddamned adorable..and sorry and he has truly learned from his mistake.

he is setting up the goal, luring the defese to spread out..he can't possible score from that far out of the circle..it would be a foolish shot...

I have found that with hard work and focus on a worthy objective, good luck falls like rain. Although really the point of a relationship is to be with somone who has your back when the bad luck comes, not someone you hate your self for caring about.

Its a choice. to talk to him, or not talk to him, to let him in, or not. To think about him, or someone else. To delete him from you freinds list and your e-mail, to drop his number from your cell..to delete the e-mails, and burn the letters. To simply say F.O.A>D and hang up when he calls. Its a choice..its not an easy one, nor is it comfortable, but its right.

Ultimately your attachment will cost you everythig. You will be miserable, you will elarn over and over how easily manipulable you are, and you will hate your self for being foolish and weak. You will hate him and grow bitter and resentful..of him, of yourself, and of everyone who has ever known a moment of happiness.

You will lose your self and your spirit and wake up at fifty tryiong to figure out where your life went and why you are not happy..hell you might even become a scientologist.

But the real cost is what you will lose spending all this time and effort on a ghost from the past, you won't know the taste of soemthing good. You won't know what its like to have someone love you inspeite of, or perhaps because of, all thin things that make you insecure. Even more so. You will deny someone the chance to find that in you.

No team ever won a hockey game sitting in thier own end looking at thier own goalie. Life is lived forward..and this moment counts more that the last.

EDIT: changed my mind and decided to go with a PM.

Is there any truth to the "Disclosure Project"?

Hehe with Men I never admit to flirting till he actually calls the next day.

With Women I dont admit to flirting except as a way to distract her from calling Uhaul.

hhmmm that wasnt worded as a question.

Jake, theres a page on the forums somewhere listing forum posters in order with most posts at the top going down. Where is it?

P.S. I used to have it in Bookmarks but they all got zapped when my PC starting dying.

P.S.S. Altho its not called ask Zap anything, I believe I know the answer to this one..



I believe its because of the toxins in the plastic being released into the water after x-amount of time. Try this: buy a small bottle of mineral water, open cap, close cap, leave for a week. Try to drink the whole thing without gagging. Its sped up because the seal is broken when you open it I think.

I've spent too much time thinking about this...

mmmhmmmmm

Jake does this mean I get to spank a forum Moderator now?

Or do they have some super secret immunity of something?

Jake, will I get banned for spilling the beans on Pretty Boy Phils humiliating insult to content creators and will you visit me at second citizen?

Spank him! I think He'd enjoy it. and since I have to ask a quesstion to avoid a spanking, Jake, why do small boys feel the need to eat or distroy everything they come into contact with?