Ask Jake Anything

Two posts no question. You have been found guilty of haveing the taint of chaos and you will be cleansed.

Here's a question: Is Colin Linden still with us?

Because you are marginalizing them, patronizing them , and dumping a silly cliche on them, while at the same time advising them they are off the team. Maybe if you spent more time working on your leadership, guidance and team building skills, including developing work plans and guidelines for you team members to follow, they would not feel so lost, and wander off on their own. The weakest link in a team is its cliche's. And Usually those come from the leader.

You can. In fact, it takes some very clever and selective interpretation to put the ewok in teamwork, whcih makes me wonder what exatly your dark twisted fatasies are about. What you do with jar-jar and the ewoks is really not somethign that should be shared on the forums. I respect your right to privacy and self indulgence, but bringing Jar-Jar and the Ewoks inot it borders on the criminal. My readers are not ready. I am not ready.

No I am not angry. In fact something came up for me, and I was gone all weekend. I am glad you had fun with Sas. We should do red-barn drink night, maybe this friday?

At least 9. Really big tanks are rated in the milliones of litres. really almost any public aquarium of any size should be pretty close to 10k literes of water. Also the real question is do you mean 10k litres in a single tank, or 10k litres aggregate? This makes a difference. Are you planning a trip to Europe? Or do you just love sushi?

Still? was he ever? I always thought he was against us.

What is the wackiest gift you have ever seen?

Nothing beats a pet rock, except maybe an al gore bobblehead.

Since it is almost Christmas, how about a Chia Pet or a Clapper?

BTW, do not let my question in any way make you think I'm using the services of your competitors....I follow Ask Jake Classic. But I am curious as to your opinion:

If you had to ask a question to any of the other 'Ask _____ Anything' imitator threads, what question would you ask and who would you ask it to?

I'd ask wuvme how big is her favorite dildo (since we know it is pink), and what is her take on the dildo v. vibrator controversy. these are questions only she can answer, and I am a guy which means I need, at time to act with all the maturity of a 13 year old.

I would say go with the clapper, it can be plugged into the same outlet as any industrial strength sex toy and and well: CLAP ON!, CLAP OFF!

Dear Jake,

How does the display of a digital watch work, and why does it look like there's liquid in there when I smash the face in with a pair of pliers?

Sincerely,
Violent & Curious

Well assuming your digital watch is a Liquid Crystal Display (as opposed to an led dispaly), that explains the liquid look when you smash the face with a pair of pliers. The short and non-technical answer is that an LCD transmits current to a crystal suspended in a liquid matrix. When charged the pixel darkens.

The time keeping in a digital watch is based on a quartz crsytal. Quartz clocks use a tuning fork made from quartz that generated a regularly timed series of electrical pulses that is used to mark time. (Analog watchs also use quartze movements.

All this being said, scrap that cheap ass digital watch, they are tacky and ugly and aare crying out to be put on a velcrom commonado wristband (you know you had one), and go out and spend a bit of money to get an automatic.

At the very least automatic watches are mechnical with lots of moving gears and springs and will explode mightly when smashed with a hammer. (The term automatic refers to the method by whcih the mainspring is wound-an automatic watch winds automatically as you wear it).

Digital watches suck, quartzy analog watches suck marginally less. Even a cheap automatic is better than a good quartz.

So where were the spiders, while the fly tried to break our balls?

Hanging out in suffragette city of course.

I think I'm in love

Egad.. How'd you know I had a velcro watchband? (It was more comfortable.)
As for an automatic watch.. Sure, when I actually have enough spare cash to buy one that i like. O.o

Oh! And another question: How many baseball players could dance on the head of a pin, assuming said pin to be seven feet long and approximately two and a half feet across?

Ah yes rules are rules, even in this age of imitators, with everyone frothing at the mouth the see what Ulrika's words of wisdom will be, there are rules. If you want to comment please post it one of the many alternative forums. This is ASK jake anything. As Flattered as I am by your declaration of affection, You did not ask a question, and thus, you will be spanked. The only question is who. Perhaps I should send you to Coco's thread and let her spank you.

Now that Ulrika and her FIC cronies all have imitation "ask jake threads", I can distribute the punishment among them. LOL I just love any chance I get to put Ulrika in the FIC. hehehe

I am Jake the all knowing, of course i know you had a velcro watch band.

To answer your second question, given the proportionate size of the pin head, two. This assumes they can dance. But really there are variables. Fisrt of they have to be able to dance when they are not on the head of a pin. Secondly we have to establish if pinch dancers are allowed, or designated dancers if they are american league players.

AM I in love? Hillary Clinton for president!

Do you appreciate my pulling you back up for air as you hovered dangerously near the 3rd page? Or have you passed the baton on to Ulrika?

she was Catholic, luckily the local priest would 'help' her with her little boys....

Jake,

Generally speaking, which are more evil - Clowns or Mimes?