Difference between verbal griefing and the right to be hatefull?

No, I'm not naive. And - I wasn't born yesterday (to say the least! ).

I live in Atlanta. My husband teaches in the inner city. Before that, I lived in Manhattan. Before that, I lived in Houston, where I taught dance in a housing project in inner city Houston. Plus I've lived in a whole bunch of other places, though not for as long.

Gun racks in trucks - a Southern thing, too, and often for hunting.

Basically, what I'm saying is though civility has suffered in the past few decades (I blame it on "Full House"!), the vast majority of people are just not the way several of you are painting them, despite that it is true it is that way for some people, in some places.

In any case, that's no reason to bring it to the forums.

coco

Don't get me wrong...I'm not defending being outwright rude...but you're giving humans too much credit...or maybe they do it in a way that you haven't caught onto yet...but people do it more than you think. It's not always in a mean way, but plenty of people take advantage of another's kindness and see it as a weakness.

That's all I'm saying.

Also, gun racks in trucks is not AT ALL a southern thing. Come out to the Northwest and you'll see plenty of redneckery! It's universal!!

Well, that's an interesting thought. But I'm sitting here thinking - how would it be POSSIBLE to take advantage of another's kindness?

After all, the other person wishes to be kind. And what they are doing to be kind isn't a huge deal - I mean, it's not like they are giving away a million dollars if you pretend to like them, or something.

And regardless, the person who did the kindness gets the reward of the pleasure of doing something for others. And I do think most people just think of it as it was offered - as the kindness, or niceity - and respond accordingly. Don't you think?

coco

The age-old scenario of the neighbor that borrows everything and never returns it, but the neighbor is too nice to confront them comes to mind. It happens all the time. How do you think I have all the stuff I do?

Dearly Darling,

I'm so glad you said that! Maneo and I are advid hunters...we kill it we eat it. I eat pheasant and fresh swordfish....as I said...there is never an excuse for bad manners. Trust me..he's a brilliant shot....I'm better...we are renivating and I want new carpet. SL allows people to be free in expression but some folks forget other values need to be accomdated here. Civility is almost a lost art that should be brought back.

Ever Yours,

Mrs. Showdog Tiger

Just think..Homer Simpson and Ned flanders

Lol, I see.

Well, I'm sure there are plenty of such situations like that. But there, you are describing the neighbor giving the sugar as being a doormat - as not wanting to give it anymore, but continuing to anyhow, because they are too "nice" to speak up.

But that has nothing to do with civility, politeness, or kindness, really, but with allowing yourself to be taken advantage of.

Most people would either (1) say, "Ok, I've given you enough sugar now, this isn't the store, you know," or (2) think to themselves, "Gee, that person is a pain about the sugar. Wonder why? Can they really not afford any? Is she lonely? Or just wants to take advantage of me getting the free sugar?"

Then the person would determine whether or not they wanted to accept the other person's friendship on their terms, if indeed friendship is being offered, and decide that the sugar is just part of that, or put a stop to the sugar-borrowing, and keep or not keep the friendly relationship, whichever turns out to be the case.

So I think nice is getting confused here with doormat.

In terms of the forums and the game, I think too often the problem is someone comes on way too aggressive, when the other person hadn't called for it at all. That's what shouldn't happen on the forums. In terms of the game, there's really no good reason to put up with it - it all depends on how much it bothers you.

(I personally like to toy with my griefers. And generally bore them into a coma.)

coco

I'm afraid as a non American i have to disagree with Xio on his interpretation of American courtesy. It has been my experience (And i was Educated in the United states for ten years) That Americans are not Rude, they are simply Less formal than other cultures. As a Non American, Our formality is Viewed as an attempt to set ourselves Above, Or being Unnecesarily Distant. I don't believe it's viewed as a Weakness, as Most Americans have expressed admiration for it In it's place, they just don't see the necessity for it in a Society where we are all Equal, One of the Family as it were.

I have found Americans to be a Generous, and Outgoing people. The first time i met a group of people from New York, after spending years hearing about how hostile they are, I Found them to be extremely friendly, And very polite. Now on a person by person basis you Will find Rude people in America, But Come to Canada, a country who's people have a strong reputation for Over politeness (Accidentally step on a Canadians Foot, and HE will apologize toy YOU) I can show you places, and people where the Rudeness will astound you.

No, On the whole, I think Americans have a Bad rap when it comes to courtesy. Casual Doesn't Immediately mean rude.

Angel.

People are people. Everyone is different. Some people are nice, some people are not.

is this like the book "real men dont each quiche" or something? lol

i'm sorry but I didn't know the measure of a man how well he could fight..

or is this just a joke cause honestly talk like that in front of me i'm gonna maybe show you about "real men" arggh as I boot you out the door..

"Discourtesy is Unspeakably Ugly to me."
Hannibal Lector.
"Silence of the lambs"

"He said where ever possible he preferred to eat the rude. Free range rude he called them."
Barny the Male Nurse, Speaking of Doctor Lecter.
"Hannibal"

Angel.

I'll explain this to you how my daddy explained it to me when i was little, and to my brothers and my cousins. In all seriousness. When you know how to fight you never have to say sorry to them. If you know how to fight, REALLY know how to fight, you don't have to self censor yourself. You can say whatever you want to to them whenever you want. if a clown knows you'll put your foot in his crack at the drop of a hat, he'll always act like he knows what time it is...2 seconds from a beat down and make sure to keep his stupidity to a minimum.

not just that...being ever vigilant against threats, but seeking out the weak and crushing them. You're the leader of the pack, an alpha dog, fight and kill weaker dogs! never be anybody's flunky...be the man.
whenever we got into any kind of fight the first thing my daddy asked was did ya win. if the answer was yes, he didn't ask anything else. if the answer was no, he'd ask when are you gonna fight again...and you better had answered , just as soon as i see that mf again.

cause we could curse...men do that too!

see my daddy raised men, not milqtoast! now in sl you can ban eject me! run in to me and talk crazy, i'm gonna talk cold cash sh*t til ya do...in rl you gonna have to fight. now i'm not saying i can beat the world..but if you can't fight, REALLY can't fight, ya gonna have a well kicked @ss to take along with ya when ya butn the road up!

this is how i was raised, and i just have no respect for a male who acts any other way. so in sl i argue a lot, and consequently get banned a lot. in rl ive been fightin since i could remember, but i look everyone square in the i, talk whatever sh*t that comes into my head, no matter who likes it or not, hit me in my mouth if you don't like what i'm saying...cause i'm gonna hit you in yours if you utter one syllable i don't like real quick...which is why i just laugh and seem all joky in the mfsl...cause most of the people here are such jokes...in rl 90% of all the the people here would be on quiet time around me..would be locked down, wouldn't say crap...another 5% would be dumb, say something crazy and get the sh*t smacked out of them and get all embarrased in front of the world, turn themselves into a funny little story everybody retells, the last 5%, well we'd be fightin like h*ll, til somebody tried to stop it, and fight everytime we see each other till ya get on Jumpy's team...or get on like ya been sh*t on...that's the realest squarest of biz..i can lay down for ya!

err okay?

i still think your joking but I could be wrong if your not i feel sorry for you if you are...... okay?

I'm being realy really serious...that's jus the sort of thing you'd never walk up to me and say rl...or really wouldn't want to...but nevermind....i am seriously curious and not in a mean and derogatory way...where r u from...generally, a hemisphere would suffice...and tell me how you get a long day to day, with your fellow human beings, when was the last time you apologized to anybody, held you tounge when speakin to anyone, wished you had said something to someone but didn't, backed down from a fight...i don't do those things, and normally i'd say cause i'm the gd jumpman, or cause i'm jumpy, or my name is lane... but i want ya to walk away from this REALLY knowin i was serious!

A man acts like i do where i am from...how would ya act here or around me

get ya self together.

Trolling, off-topic, flaming.

*locks*