Ejecting an intruder from my land

Emotions are a normal human way of expression. Not reacting with emotions is reacting as a machine.... Not reacting with emotions is a lie or at least fooling yourself and/or others.

If I would remove "emotions" from my work, even for the persons I never met in person, I would fail in my job. My customers want a human to work with, not a machine.

Morwen.

Yes, I know. Maybe it is in for a change so we can get around it.

Morwen.

A normal way in a normal world. Electronic world is different. It has its own charateristics, wich make it very different from a face-to-face communication. That's what we have learned since Delphi teleconferencing (Murray Turoff, 1975). Lots of people had been harmed for failing to understand that. Including myself, in the very beginning. So, 1975-2007 are only 32 years of "fooling others".

I would call in these days communication through "electronic" ways a very normal way of communication... 40 years ago maybe not, but now adays it is.

From your perspective even through a phone-call you could not show or trust emotions. That is turning the world back some decades in my opinions.
I use many ways of "electronic" communications these days, private and for my work.... mail, msn, icq, skype, cell phone, wireless Internet on my notebook, Second Life and name them all. In those I show all what I am... a woman with strong emotions. Something else would be fooling myself.

Anyway, this will be my last reply to you in this thread about this subject. I won't allow to have this thread blow sky high..... and that is an emotion .

Morwen.

It may, because voice carries a lot of out-of-band information. On the telephone, you can hear if i'm happy, angry, stressed, if i joke or not. In SL, you can't. I have a limited bandwith to you, and cannot send cues about my mood, nor receive about yours. I must not interpret your words as i would in a face-to-face meeting. And i have to care to anticipate any false interpretation you may have from mines.

And no, that's not fooling anybody. That's accounting for the specificities of the medium i use. Avatars add absolutely nothing over chat. No face expression, no body expression, nothing. Most of the way, they appear stupid and in flagrant opposition to what we are feeling. Trying to interpret their body attitude as irl would be catastrophic, imho. Worst, i think the avatar is a source of distraction from the message the player is trying to send. So, i can say without being excessive that SL is inferior to -say- IRC to communicate.

I totally agree that RL rules of behavior really should apply in SL. I would never think to just walk in and flop down in someone's space, virtual or otherwise. So, what has worked for me is the locked door and scripted drapes for additional privacy when dressing, etc.

I rent forested land in an area that has a 'no ban lines' covenant, which I actually like because it keeps the neighborhood scenic. But, there is just no way to avoid the curious neighbor or occasional wandering newbie. Frankly, I like to peek at other homes' decor too (after making sure I am not disturbing anyone).

Anyway, I keep the door locked if I'm there or not. What is funny is that often I come home and my scripted items will be activated...like my lights will be on or my tea kettle will be singing...etc. People like to play with things through the windows. LOL

I also have a great multi-purpose lock door script and a visitor counter script you can drop into a welcome mat and see just how many people are visiting your home per day. I am always amazed at the amount of people who swing by. Mostly newbies.

Give me a IM if you'd like a copy of the scripts. Cheers!

Ellen

I totally agree that RL rules of behavior really should apply in SL. I would never think to just walk in and flop down in someone's space, virtual or otherwise. So, what has worked for me is the locked door and scripted drapes for additional privacy when dressing, etc.

I rent forested land in an area that has a 'no ban lines' covenant, which I actually like because it keeps the neighborhood scenic. But, there is just no way to avoid the curious neighbor or occasional wandering newbie. Frankly, I like to peek at other homes' decor too (after making sure I am not disturbing anyone).

Anyway, I keep the door locked if I'm there or not. What is funny is that often I come home and my scripted items will be activated...like my lights will be on or my tea kettle will be singing...etc. People like to play with things through the windows. LOL

I also have a great multi-purpose lock door script and a visitor counter script you can drop into a welcome mat and see just how many people are visiting your home per day. I am always amazed at the amount of people who swing by. Mostly newbies.

Give me a IM if you'd like a copy of the scripts. Cheers!

Ellen

Anyone that doesn't have to live in fear of emotional overload from simply being in a crowd.

I agree with Jeff here, that we are, In communicating this way, Missing (I forget the exact percentage) a Major part of the Non verbal ques to emotion that we have in RL. We cannot see stance, Nor hear Vocal stresses So, if one is Incautios one can become involved in Bitter disputes over Nothing. I've seen people go at it Hammer and Tongs in these, and Other Forums Because they Lacked the Patience to Assume that the other persons words were no more than Poorly Chosen, or Phrased. It's an old axiom that when one is blinded ones Other senses sharpen somewhat in order to compensate. In these Forums, And in SL, we are Fairly Blinded to a Good portion of the emotional Ques of others. I believe it Isn't Impossible to Compensate. Patience is Part of it. Strong Verbal skills is another (Called in other terms "Reading between the Lines".

Like Solar (And Honestly, Like just about everyone else in the world), the Emotions of Others Effect me. His answer seems to be (If i read him Correctly) Blocking out use of his emotions all together in Communicating in this Fashion. I think that Could work if, and Only If those you were communicating with were part of the Understanding that emotions will no longer play a Role in our interactions. Sadly, I don't think that is the Case. I, on the other hand Use my emotions. I Feel, Just as any other person does But i Understand that I am Not necesarily on the same wavelength as the persons i am speaking to, so i Don't let my emotions Control the situation (Mostly). I'm Not perfect, and never claimed to be so i Do get angry, or Upset But rather than ACT upon those emotions, I choose to explore further, and gain more ques to the other persons Intent.

I can Tell you, that tends to drive the people close to me in SL Nuts as i appear to be at times Overly Tolerant, But I just want to be sure, If i'm Booting someone, or Banning them, that i have a REAL reason for doing so. and this brings us Back to the OP.She wasn't sure If indeed she reacted fairly towards the person she Booted, and Banned, so she consults Us. Apart from all the side discussions, and definitions of definitions, the Over all concensus seems to be she Did react in a measured, and Balanced Manner.

Angel.

I don't live in fear of emotional overload. Most emotions are very enjoyable... and even sad emotions proof that you are alive and so important in life.

Blocking or denying emotions is known to lead to problems as well. We have our emotions with reason. One as reaction on and to handle the things that happen around us.

Morwen.

Well, I do realize that communications as in SL is different as face-to-face/voice-to-communication (or any combination of those). This for the reasons mentioned.

But is that reason to dey emotions about and by none face-to-face communication? I don't thinkso ... and as you said already, most of us will be effected by emotions, even if they are caused by something happening in SL for instance. But is that bad? No, emotions are important part of our life. Even sad or negative emotions have very well their meaning in our life.

Morwen.

Unfortunately as enjoyable as emotions are - when it comes down to blocking out a crowd or suffering the effects of being buffeted by too many at once from several sources .....

I'll choose blocking anyway.

Too each their own, as they say.

For me, and I only refer here to me, I think handling emotions, sad and negative ones included (and I have known a number of bad times in my life as well), made me a stronger person. But as said, that is only me.

Morwen.

Again, thought provoking Jeff, and I'm in no way going to criticise what you say. I'm merely picking this paragraph out as it clearly shows a point where people are looking for different things.

Many regular posters will groan at my repeated history here so I'll keep it as short as poss:
Less than a decade ago, I came across someone on the now sadly passed on Starship Titanic help forum. Text only, it, and ICQ where we also 'met', proved some of the points made slightly earlier in this thread about misunderstanding and launching into needless arguments. Through it however we formed a bond and became good friends. We did this through the simple narrow bandwidth of internet chat.
We subsequently met IRL and later got engaged etc etc but we gained something valuable by letting our emotions be exposed to this crude communication mechanism.

I enjoy Second Life. I'm openly addicted to it to be honest. Knowing fully the limitations of interpretation .. and misinterpretation I have met many wonderful people. Even here on forum alone I've formed a greater respect for a lot of the posters.
This was by letting my emotions through. By a complete block on emotions, SL for me would become nothing more than a pre-online The Sims. Ugh!! For me, the knowledge that there is a real person the other side of that cracking-looking guy or lady avatar, regardless of race, creed, gender or breed even, is exciting. It is emotional and without that, I wouldn't have stayed more than a week or two.

Back to the OP, I radared close to a skybox last night wondering where this green point on the mini-map really was. I was sooo tempted to swing my camera through and had to fight the temptation hard. I'm very glad in retrospect I managed.
Yes, Bilbo's avatar isn't me ... but it's my ambassador.

regardsless of how one feels about this medium, there are real living breathing people at the other end of the text, ava, or however you view this for lack of a better term at 2am, game. when you log in, wether you acknowledge it or not, you are bringing a little of yourself into this medium, you are bringing your thoughts, belief system, morals, and yes your emotions.

no matter what "face" one brings into here, little by little, your true self seeps through.who you are begins to show, in how you think and how you act. no one person can remain "nuetral" for too long. if you are rude offline, you will eventually be a bit rude in here, if you are kind offline, you will be kind in here. can one separate thier emotions from this medium? in some cases yes. sometimes you have too.

but eventually they begin to seep back through. if we were truly without feelings, there wouldn't be forum posts like this one. nor would one feel the need to respond.

Morwen, your case classical for invisibility option. Approximately as "under construction" when the site on the Internet still is not ready.


SL a suitable place that studies to supervise the negative emotions.

No problem, bilbo. We are indeed looking for different things. Second Life has no goal. We define ours. They are all different. My interest in Second Life is mainly scientific and technical. I don't come in SL to chat with people. I may miss some valuable relation but i had enough in my life, and don't forget that meeting people irl means buying an international airplane ticket.

That do not mean i have no social guidelines. The same i have at work, in a meeting, a conference... where I have to make the difference between the ideas and the person, that is the intellect and the emotions. If i could not block my emotions, i'd surely have lost my job, being not able to handle conflictual situations. And on neuroleptics now. The sci&tech side of Second Life can stick me addict for years. This goes a lot farther than The Sims, beleive me! I had no hesitation to pay a year of Premium account.

We are so different