How NOT to impress a lady you have just met...

I went to 4 different sandboxes the other day and not one would allow me to work, one didn't allow people to build (doh), one had a griefer who teleported me elsewhere, and two had giant crap over the landing point which was impossible to exit through. I'd much rather have some moron with his prim penis out that I could ignore than wasting my time looking for a simple sandbox. FYI Torleys sandbox is nice, forget the big ones...

When you crash your avatar normally stays in-world for a few minutes, so chances are a whole Romeo & Juliet scenario unfolded involving your avatar without your knowledge.

Dearly Darlings,

That gave me a good laugh! Something like this happened to me RL in Home Depot looking for wall paper a while back. Someone here in SL had suggested I read some books by Spider Robinson....I'm glad I took his advice. When he wiggled his item not in the cart I calmly looked over, glanced up at his face and said "It looks Like a man's......only smaller." He was arrested leaving the store after I reported him to the manager. The video tape supported my claim of indecent exposure.

You all have a lovely morning!

Ever Yours,

Mrs. Showdog Tiger

When I "worked" at an Infohub as a helper I often had naked newbs arriving. It was just part of the job to get them dressed. I am certain that some of these idiots are just plain rude but I once had to inform a (very obviously) masculine avatar that his Phallus (no better word) was evident to all and sundry and he didn't know it - he was a nice guy from the UK. So I think mistakes can be made. I once wandered naked in a PG mall because I was so used to my avatar. I am a female so I had some shocked IMs from some VERY prudy men. Anyway, I always check out the nudie-newbies just to see what kinda gear they have on - it's the ones that resemble a 747 that make me laugh.

Not tryin to turn this into my usual rante, but dis is prob'ly why a lotta newbies seem to have problems when they see a kid avvie like mine. They're there for all the s-e-x they've heard about in here, an then they see a kid avvie and can't wrap their head around it.

I have had newbies hit on me before, though. Not in the creepy "come here little girl" sorta way, but in the "you have a female name and a virtual heartbeat" way.

And when I see the prim peener, I usually giggle a lot an tell em to put it back in their pants in my most kid-like way. Typically they move pretty fast on dat then. If they persist, I let them know about the wonders of ARs.

Mari

What gets me is that there are those newbies that think that walking around with a penis attached (or worse, huge prim boobs) is perfectly acceptable behavior. Like, yeah, SL is one big orgy...not. I see a lot of this on Help Island Public and it becomes a distracter when I'm trying to help someone with a legitamate problem and Newbie69 Whatever comes next to me, with attachement enplaced, and IM's me with,"I think you're hot, wanna F*&%?" At this point, I am usually plunged into a stress factor (Stress: Where your mental powers override your emotional need to orbit someone who despirately needs it.).

I usually do one of three things:

1.) Kindly back away, and state that he doesn't have the right equipment for that (I sometimes get the answer,"What, you want it bigger?". If said newbie is clueless here...step 2.) I embarrass him the best I can in public..i.e. "Oh, thanks (insert newbie name here) for giving me your MySpace page and your email address. I've signed you up to recieve solicited emails from 30 beastiality and gay porn sites for you because I know you love it...if you want more, please ask )
If steps 1 or 2 don't work...Abuse Report.

Of course, I still get the stubborn ones...you know, the ones that seek attention at whatever cost. These special cases I mute and ignore....and if said Newbie pushes, I sit. Eventually, they move on.

A couple thoughts as I read this... great OP by the way. chuckle.

1. Many men are defined by their manhood in RL, so really, is it all that unusual behaviour to find them wanting to make sure they are properly equipped in SL? There is no excuse for poor behaviour on any level, but the need some newbie males have for ensuring they are "fully functional" (even with an ugly prim), may simply be carryover from RL. And as someone pointed out -- they might not realize they're exposing their wedding tackle for all to see.

2. Why oh why do some men think that any female avatar is foing to swoon and "give it up" for ridiculous professions of love and adoration BEFORE any sort of a conversation can happen? Are these the same guys who use bad pick up lines in bars? The attitude that "I find you hot and therefore you should be honoured to receive my affections, so let's have sex" is repulsive.

I was in a club one night and one particularly annoying Child Man was waving his Hopes and Dreams in all our faces. He was orbited twice and came back. Third time he gave up and logged out but his Avi stayed. So we decorated him with all sorts of offensive stuff, bared our breasts and took a photo with him. He stayed there quite a while, before finally poofing.

OMG! LMAO! That's priceless!!

Mandy C

Yes, newbie dongs can be out by accident. Saw one guy on Help Island not responding to requests from the helpers to put his away. IM'd him. Turned out to be a Bulgarian guy with limited English. When he figured out what the message was, he was very apologetic and put it away immediately. I think it's the over-the-shoulder camera view. From that angle, you just won't see the thing.

I hope you gave him a Coke and a smile......

OMG!! GOOD COMEBACK!! Mt firsst thought is "youre in the wrong aisle for screws." but that is priceless!! Mkaes Newbs with theri bits hangingout seem harmelss by far!

As to my own experience, I attach my long, glimmering Jintachi Sword and brandish it with an evil laugh. BUT only after askign very nicely to put the offending prim away! Also, ti seems most of these offenders have a limited English Vocab, usually including profane words, and not an ounce of romance LMAO! The angry lesbian Lover scenario is something I would love to try! Methinks I will the next time some newbie wants to poke me pixels!!

But-but-b-but .. Lucrezia!?!??


Seriously though, can I make a small confession? .... yeah yeah, go on .. laff!!
No, really, this is a mere one line of defence for the guys .. well some of them mebbe.

I clearly remember the disorientating, mind boggling whirl of getting to grips with SL. Apart from the mere mechanics of moving, doing things, changing things, one of the most awesome factors I remember was that every direction I looked there were fantastically beautiful women. Gobsmacked doesn't even get to first base with what that meant to me for one.

I've always been shy and an utter klutz/clown/moron/<insert word here> at the infamous chat-up line. I'd sweat. My throat would go dry. I'd tremble. I'd blush .. and ultimately I'd run out of the room gasping for air. Have you stopped laughing yet?

It was terrible. It might go something to explain why I'm 53 and only now engaged. Anyway, the fact that I was facing moving avatar forms controlled by 'someone' was bewildering. And the women? I just found myself staring in wonderment. And the best thing? They couldn't tell I was staring at them.

I cracked. I said Hello to one. They replied. Bloody Hell!!!!

Behaviourally, SL is quite a culture shock. For all the repeated lines in the forum about courtesy and politeness and respect, there can be no simple categorising for the emotional shock that you are now facing artistic creations that speak. I'm sure every one of us has reacted slightly different at that juncture and albeit temporarily have acted out of all character. It's been said some of these noobs once talked to and have immersed into a conversation and 'told the error of their ways' change to become valuable additions to the population.

So yes, let's laugh at them, let's ridicule them .. but heck, let's give them a chance?

/soapbox

/me hugs Bilbo.

I didn't laugh. I think it's sweet. Particularly when put side-by-side with some of the more caustic and obnoxious approaches by some.

That said, the funniest random entry on my parcel:

me -> building (shocking) the second floor of a house

random guy lands, I don't see him at first

Out of the corner of my eye, I see an av, and wait for either TP out, or a "Hi" or whatever.

Him (walking through the front door): Honey, I'm home!

Me: SL, stock still. RL, head tilted with classic Scooby-Doo "errRR?" expression

Him (continuing through the house, out to the deck): MAN! What a sh*t day! Feel like a drink??

Me: SL & RL bust out laughing

We conversed for a few minutes, he left and I thought it was the most original (non-confrontational) oddness I'd seen to date.

Hey don't be to hard on the 4 prim romeos they are some of the best ways to break the ice. Vilantly saving some girl from there half ass advances with my giant, betenticled, 4 m long, hell cat ava has helped introduce me to many wonderful ladys and a few gents. Plus compaired to them us other cyber romeos look positivily don juanish.

*puts on his most innocent smile*

Indeed, but it works both ways. I don't know if you have a male alt, but make him look half decent and you'll soon get sick of females and escorts coming onto him in public areas. I had to have a five minute conversation with the genitals of one once just to make her go away.

Half of these escorts are men of course. I got so tired of one once, I said "OFGS I'm gay, I couldn't get it up if you paid me, never mind the other way around." To which she says, "well .. i do have a secret actually."

"Yeah, if you're not really a guy then you probably look like Mama Cass with a hangover so purlease, stop it!"

It does appear that the fine art of flirting and the ability to use charm has been lost by many in the younger generation. Which is fine, gives us old men a chance.

As long as you bring those strawberries.......

Agreed! I can't count the offers I get in a day.

Two words

When?
Where?

lol

LOL... Former statement does not apply to hobbits...



Oh I agree... to a point. But when a male avatar rudely (not really compliments) speaks to a female, and utters such lines couched in the idea that the female should drop her kit just because he's paying attention to her... well... it's obnoxious.

I see an inherent difference in social fumbling (and I'm very shy too actually) and making like Linden's gift to SL that all women must worship.

Social fumbling is cute... like hobbitsies.

And champagne... must have champagne with strawberries...

And I just want to clarify my earlier comment (having severe brain fuzz this morning). My eyebrow quirk and incredulousness (is that a word? should be) is in regards to conversations that go like:

Me: *minding my own business, doing whatever*
Guy: I like your look.
Me: Thanks.
Guy: You're hot.
Me: Thank you.
Guy: Let's cyber/have sex/partner up etc.?

At least make with some small talk first! LOL And most of the time the final line is not preceded with "do you want..."... there's an assumption that it will happen.

*quirks kitty brow*

PS: Where are the romantic older men hiding at?

Probably in the Gor Sims........

Let me make a confession, my little hobbit friend. Behaviour like yours always struck me as cute, although I have to admit that I tend to let guys sweat a bit more by giving them an emotionless stare. Just my sadistic nature I guess...

Mandy C