Lonely, fed up, not enjoying it....

Indeed we did sir, in Lassitude and Ennui, I believe.

Flee! Flee! Run for your life! Escape while there is still time!

OK, just to be the contrary wench I am, I'm just going to come out and suggest that...

For some people, friendships are overrated.

SL is NOT about the people first and foremost for me. I value my quiet time in SL very, very highly because I need it to create stuff, which is what I enjoy doing the most in SL.

If you want to sit in a tree all by yourself and work out how to make a one prim flower for hours on end, by all means, go ahead. I did. I thoroughly enjoyed myself, too. I would not use how many friends one has as a measure of how you've "won" or "lost" in SL.

I have also spent plenty of days roaming around looking at trains, buildings, dams, go karts, zoos... just plug a word that interests you into Find and see what's out there. Enjoy your own company!

Sabrina, I enjoyed what you had to say.

I'm only a couple months old and knew nothing about SL when I joined.

In RL I own a tech consulting company and teach and have other demanding hobbies. In truth, I never came into SL looking for friends. I wanted to play the voyeur (not in a pervy way, actually), flit about, investigate and play with people's pose balls (I jokingly have a mission to touch every pose ball in SL). I LOVED exploring and doing it all solo.

Then something happened. I met, quite by accident, and conversed with some very very cool people. I wasn't looking for friends or contact. I needed a place to unwind and distract.

Now I have that, and friends, and now land, and more ideas than I really need, but what the heck.

Bottom line -- SL is what you make it, just like life. Be true to you, your interests, be kind to others, and allow SL to begin reflecting who you really are. It's amazing what you discover about yourself when you are faced with the idea that you CAN do anything.

Cheers.

Very well stated - and very true that you can do anything in SL

-2fast

I think everyone's pretty much covered everything! but I just wanted to add....sailing.

I don't sail in RL and I can't even remember why I thought I'd give it a go in SL. But it's brilliant!

The boats are scripted so they behave like real sailing boats, and you can rent one for an hour for free. There's a group (also free) called the Second Life Sailing Federation full of the nicest people I've ever met too. And you can sail (yes, for free) at places like Nantucket and Hollywood.

In fact there's a race almost every day at 1pm at Nantucket. Fun to compete but fun to spectate too.

I think the Herald had it down as one of the top 5 fun things to do in SL and I totally agree. Getting bored? Stuck in a rut? Try sailing!

p.s. I'm not getting paid for this you know

The phrase that comes to mind is "help-rejecting complainer."

The above quotes from Sabrina's and Lucrezia's post I could have written myself.

But what I wanted to add is something I tell new residents when I mentor on help island. When they ask me for suggestions on what to do when they are ready to head off to the mainland I tell them... "explore... and explore more... take a week or several weeks to explore. And as you do... don't go looking for SL... let SL find you."

Yea, it is nothing great. It was much more fun before all the business mags and papers started to print sotries on SL. Now there are just a bunch of noobie, want-a-bee money makers in SL and most of them live in their mom's basement. It is sad. SL, at one point, was full of artists and love. Now it is full of scams and griefers, etc. It sucks I know.

I'm new to SL, too, and I would say I've had a mixed experience. I confess, some of what I have enjoyed the most has been reading the forums!

I love the advice others have given in this thread. I have had evenings when I've logged in and had an amazing time. I saw an art show the other day that blew me away--really high quality art that was exactly to my taste, and I had a great conversation with a fellow graphic designer half a world away. I've also made friends with someone of more or less the same vintage as me who only "speaks" French and am improving my written French at a pace I haven't seen since high school. The timing couldn't be more perfect as I'm applying for several jobs in RL where written French will provide me an edge in the hiring.

But I definitely have times when I log in where I just kind of wander around feeling a little lost. And then I have a night like last night where I spend some time trying to figure out how to build stuff and get bullied all up and down a sand box for twenty minutes while leafing through the Help files to find out how to submit an abuse report. (Also, if I may say for the record: I know people like to rail on about newbies and unverified accounts, but these two jerks had join dates from 2005; I was aghast.)

I think that part of it depends on what you are looking for. Sometimes I just want to wander around and see things and I don't care if I have any chit chat beyond, "Hi." Other times, what I'm really looking for is a human connection--those are the times when I feel disappointed if it doesn't happen.

I have one question: I've read in the forums a few times about mentors; how does one go about finding one in game?

Anyhow, my next step is to try to find a class on building that suits my RL schedule, because I am dying to create stuff.

Looli, for tutorials so you can learn at your own pace visit the Ivory Tower of Primitives for building, and Jopsy's Particle Lab for particles.

Building is a true joy, I think.

I am new as well... though have had much better experience than Wenn....


I would love to try building... but such a KLUTZ, even moving objects around I somehow manage to misshape, etc.



"Only the curious will learn and only the resolute overcome the obstacles to learning. The quest quotient has always excited me more than the intelligence quotient."

--Eugene S. Wilson

Reading all the posts here... Wenn needs to take a lesson. You folks are truly inspirational, gonna keep trying and buggin' the friends I have who can ACTUALLY do it.

Meggy

That's exactly what I was trying to say. Thank you. SL does find you, if you let it. Just as life happens, SL happens as well.

And finally, if something is not appealing, don't subject yourself to it. There's no point in whingeing about all the casinos in SL if you dislike gambling -- just avoid them. It is far better to invest one's heart, mind, soul and energy into enjoyable and positive aspects rather than dwell on the negative.

Pardon my ramble. I just had to say that "...let SL find you" is a very cool quote. Because sooner or later, it does.

Find you avi a sexy friend and get SL l--d. *wink*

It is really really hard not to subject yourself to all of the disrespect, and the porn. i can not walk around without seeing something so harmful to people's minds, and it is allowed and sold around second life like that is alright. everyone should do what they would like to, but not when it abuses people's rights to live and be happy with a mind free of disrespect and harm, from things that abuse them like a hit on the head would. it really sticks in my mind, the images they keep showing everyone. it is scary because these images degrage everyone, and make people feel like they are worthless. and they are allowed.

If SL isn't for you then there is no shame in that. Just move on to something that is.

You need to becareful, many many strange a totally sick people playing this game. After awhile you know you get the feeling what is what after awhile. Just becareful and do what your heart feels.


Usagi

Thanks, Osprey. I happened upon the Ivorty Tower tutorials last night after following up on something someone else said in this thread. I'm looking forward to getting down to it!

I am also quite new (my profile is misleading, I tried a couple of months ago and gave up because of lag-I couldn't resist now that I'm on a slightly better connection ). A simple suggestion someone made in one of the other threads (the one asking why choose furriness) turned out to be really good: get a tiny avatar. It's true, no one can resist a knee high furball, I even got invited into some stranger's house yesterday while I was exploring You don't need to be 'into' furry fiction for a tiny to give you a whole new perspective on SL, and it's a guaranteed way to meet new people-'biggies' included

I recommend taking a basic building class or using the tutorials at the Ivory Tower. Experimentation is fun! Just make something simple - my first object was a "beanbag chair." Hah hah! Well, a textured lump, anyway!

Move on to make a table or a huge bowl of Cheerios or a flower on a stem. You will have a blast and before you know it you'll have teh skillz.

Learn to: link things, select multiple objects, apply separate textures to prim faces. Twist different shapes and see what you get. Make at least one big, weirdly textured object and wear it on your head for fun.

Flint, the Tinies act (rehearsing for the vaudeville/music hall show) could use more Tiny performers. If you are interested IM me, or IM Ida Keen and tell her you want to be in the Tiny act.

I'm sorry you feel this way livinglight. It certainly came to me as a shock when I came in-world. I read many threads on this, some quite heated. LL have rewritten some of their Terms of Service or Community Standards, I forget which, to reduce some of the more offensive matter.

You should however be able to avoid most if not all 'adult' content by staying in the PG areas. This is by no means a guaranteed zoning as my own home plot is in fact in a Mature area!

As for degrading everyone you must consider that the World Wide Web is accessing all cultures and walks of life. Not everyone have the same built-in standards. Not everyone shares the same lifestyle.

We have quite a useful step-by-step introduction to the Basic Building Tools over on Stratics Second Life, which you may find useful. Feel free to drop by our little sandbox in Rosieri to practice!

Broccoli

The people in SL, for the most part, are very helpful and nice. Yay us!

Most people in SL are very nice & helpful, try just asking for help if you need help learning to build or whatever, hang about a busy sandbox watching others build to see what is possible, just use search to visit every nightclub in SL but still stopping to talk to interesting people, hang around a newbie area and help the brand new people to get to where you are quicker, possibly learning more yourself in the process. Enter any word in search and check out the results. Go to the big map and just TP to where there are lots of people or interesting looking terrain.