Have other people found love on SL? How did that turn out in RL?

Hi Feline,

I don't think you are immature or whatsoever. Life in general shouldn't be limited on some conservative traditions and how things "should" be (in the eye of society).

My best female friend in RL met her husband in a chat room seven years ago. They are still married and happy. Eventually the digital age creates much broader ways of meeting that special someone or best friend.

Listen to your heart and not what others think it's right. It's you who has to deal with the consequences of your actions. Good luck on whatever you do.

R/g Mija

Thanks Mija,
That's exactly what I'm doing! Like I said in another thread today, sometimes it takes a leap of faith to get the most out of life! And right now, we are still standing strong as a couple!

If it smells like chicken and it tastes like chicken...

I love you!!

Lead with your heart, but follow with your head.

Feline, Auntie Jig would like to give you a few pieces of advice.
Be friends with your partner but avoid love - if he says he loves you, well ask him to gift you 25000 lindens (the cost of a reasonable dinner out)
DONT believe the pictures. I just saw a profile of a Av which was obviously a fake. Unless Richard Avedon (dead I believe) is taking personal pics for SL users ...
Remember for some of us (including me) SL is a private fantasy. I will NEVER EVER EVER let a lover/friend/acquaintance in SL close to me in real - I have been the victim of real-life stalking - and trust me on this - you dont want or need it.
Now smarten up - have him pleasure you in sl but have a real life also with a real partner who you can hug and "feel" if you get my drift.

**Feline, your post has stimulated much response, which is great...some are silly but most I think are very straightforward and sincere. My reply here is to respond to you 2nd question of "How did that turn out in RL?"

The method or means of finding love is not within its way of finding us. Your giving love to another without expectation is a true love; their response is not guaranteed, and need not be if it was approached without that expectation. Granted, we would probably like love to be returned in kind, but really when it comes down to it....its in OUR loving another that really is the most fulfilling. My RL partner and I met in chat, now in the eighth yr. of our marriage.

I agree with those here about the importance of honesty. This will be discovered very soon after a RL meeting or even within SL. However, any "committed" relationship will test your love, that love is continually tested the entire time you are inside that commitment. This is the nature of promise and personal integrity. Your being 'trusted' is directly related to you keeping your promises. To break a promise of any kind will hurt not only the one you broke that promise to, but also to whom you made the promise. The guilt that lives inside a broken promise can also lead to depression.

I am not a Bible toting preacher, but I have not discovered anything that expresses “what love is” better than the following:

"If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known. And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love." (1 Corinthians 13:1-13)

Notice that the above emphasizes "but have not love". The very best I can do in life is to love others; if I were to expect it...do you really think it would be real/true love? Therefore, it will turn out however it turns out, regardless of how or where you have met.

Separately, I'd like to share my views on your first question, which might stimulate all kinds of responses, but, nothing ventured is nothing gained. Please see my next post on "Have other people found love on SL”.

Gary

I've been in SL since July 2004, met my partner in August 2004 and we are still together. But I keep my RL separate from SL and we won't meet in RL.

There are some foolish people in SL, I was talking to a girl in world who told me that she had known a guy for 8 weeks and he was moving into her RL home later that day. I call that madness.

I only concern myself with the in-world identities of other avatars I meet in SL. I take them at face value as there's no point in going beyond that except, perhaps, to know which country their RL is from.

Take a doll's house or model railway analogy. 'In-world' the players dress their Barbies or drive their trains, while in their RL's they talk about where you can get the latest Barbie whirlpool bath cheap, or what the next model loco on the shoping list is.

I thought I would add my comments.

I met someone in SL and we became fast friends, we finished each other's sentences, had a blast.

We started talking a lot and hanging around together all the time. We finally became "exclusive" in SL.

Things were great, and we were having fun, till he ended up deciding that he wanted to go back to a an abusive person and he left me with the land and the bills.

Word of advice to say it is just women who suck men dry...try again honey. It goes both ways. This guy sucked me dry of $$$, friendship, trust and emotions on here that I will never let happen again.

Just be careful (which is sounds like you are being Feline) and go into things with an open mind.

My experience taught me to use my head and not always lead with my heart.

For me SL is just an interactive soap opera, with a bit of adventure tossed in that stars my avatar. Sure I talk to my friends about RL stuff sometimes but I try to keep it really basic, like, " I am not going to be on at my normal time but a few hours later cause of this rl issue". But once I log out everything that is in SL stays in SL.