Do you list 1st Life Info?

Let me set the scene...

My cutsie little kani furry has just recently been partnered with an adorable husky. We are disgusting together, and both quite happy.
The catch? My partner is my wife. No biggie, right?
IRL I am a happily married woman to a sweet and wonderful guy. I even listed so on my 1st portion of my profile. So, straight in RL, gay in SL.
Here is my problem; a good bit of my former non-interested male friends are now suddenly interested in me in an (unprovocted) relationship manner....to the point where I am getting love letters and stuff throughout the day. My friends list is wittling away slowly.
I'm considering taking the bit about my RL down because I think it is sending off the wrong impression; conflicting RL to SL sexualities and whatnot.
I'm still fairly new, but now I'm starting to see who so many people don't list anything under that part of their profile.



The Question:
Do you have anything under '1st Life'? Why or why not?
Was there some sort of event that changed your opinion on this matter?

If your profile presents your rl/sl information in as confused a fashion as your post then I am not surprised that you are being hassled.

Try explaining your status more clearly in your profile and I am sure your problems will be resolved.

Pep (and anyone who doesn't/can't read your profile you can happily ignore anyway)

PS There is stuff about my RL in my Profile tab which tells more about me than all the rest of the profile combined

My RL tab is blank. Any details will be given if and when I choose to any particular person.I don't look at others' RL tabs, I'm not interested.

My "1st Life" tab entry:
And the image on that tab is a pic of my avatar.

I'm a prolific profile reader. That said, my RL tab has a *little* in it ... sometimes it even has a RL pic. But it's fairly limited; I lead a very private RL and I want it to stay that way.

Keeping common sense in mind, I wouldn't put TOO much in there - but given the current situation, I'd certainly mention you're happily married, and certainly mention that uninvited sexual advances are not welcome.

This.

My RL tab only tells where I am from in RL. Which makes it some easier for people to know when I might be online, if they bother to check the time differences. The rest of my RL is no secret, and if people ask me things, they may get an answer (depending on how well I know them).

The fact I am partnered (to my RL girlfriend who is never online anyway) does not stop incidental tries from female avatars to get some , but most people I actualy know in SL, are aware that I am not interested in romantic gettogethers, or poseball hopping. The latter I already do too much with my alts when aligning animations So probably, it does not matter what you put in your profile anyway.

Yeah I list 1st Life info in my profile...and noone hassles me. But I also don't do any sort of role playing or use any kind of avatar other than a human female.....which is what I am IRL.

I don't try to blur the lines with others in SL for any reason.....I am pretty much just me. So.....the only kinds of people that I really form any kind of connections with.......have a similar agenda. They are not in SL to 'play games'. I think as soon as people jump into any kind of character mode......and become willing to role play in any form........then that invites others to 'play' as well. Only some people have really hard time keeping RL and SL seperate and.....well...... things can get out of hand.


I think the biggest reason that I don't experience any 'drama' in SL.....is because I don't treat it like a second life. I don't have a partner....I don't throw on a bunny suit and goof off with other like characters.....I don't get 'involved' in any depthe in the social dynamic. I stick to my art/photography......and I meet some really cool genuine folks that way.

So......I don't think your RL info on your profile has anything to do with the behavior your describing from others...... I think it has yo do with the fact that it 'conflicts' with what you do in SL.....so maybe people just see you as fair game for messing with cause you're already messing with yourSLself.

if i do, it's all made up B.S.

I had to check what I had in my RL tab, since it's been years since I looked at *anyone's*.

Only a flippant remark suggesting I'm not in SL to talk about anyone's 1st life.

"How I act in SL is a fair reflection of the real me. My avatar usually looks different. The RL stuff? I'm 38, single and from England. The details you might pick up as you get to know me."

I have a RL picture in the 1st life tab too.

People still ask me A/S/L, so I guess a lot of people don't check the RL tab, or have got used to there being nothing on there.

I go back and forth. Some days I'll tell myself "what the heck" and add some juicy RL tidbits along with a RL picture. The next day I'll think to myself "hmm... I'm not keen on that after all" and take it all down. I go through this multiple times throughout the month. I don't know why.

I think is called multiple personality disorder or something

I do, somewhat, because my rl is mixed up with my sl. The non profit board that I am on in sl, which owns the sim I manage, is a rl 501 (c) 3, and a lot of what we do with agencies, orgs, etc is back and forth between sl and rl. For example, I am sitting on a panel discussion, in sl on Saturday, for Nokia, an rl phone company. They are streaming it to their various offices in rl as a training seminar. They know who I am in rl. So I have a little out there. If I had an alt, that wasn't involved in this kind of thing, I wouldn't have any rl at all, would be blank, if SL was just fun and escapism.

My 1st life tab gives a bit of RL info and a quote that tells a bit about me:

Colorado, USA (MST) - And yes I really could live on a dance floor !!!!

"Sometimes I wonder whether the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on, or by imbeciles who really mean it."
~ Mark Twain

To answer the question, I think the most I've had in my RL tab was "Don't tell anyone, I'm really a codfish."

I think mine just says that I'm happily married and have a child.

Sometimes I think THAT's a bit too much information.

I have a FL photo of myself as a kid, a small amount of text, and a quote (with permission!) from Zara Linden about age assertion.

i dont see what the big deal is.

I put my RL info, my email, my yahoo IM, my 1st Life pic which i update weekly, sometimes daily, and I do not find i suffer any extra harassment from it.

I have very basic info there, the general area i'm from, that I have a partner I'm involved with in SL and RL, a quip about a RL interest or two, and anything else about me will be learned as you get to know me.

I read profiles religiously and appreciate the information in them. I do enjoy creative content, and details, but for myself try and stick to basics in that space. I'm pretty open with those I know, but I see no reason to write a novel in that area. I certainly don't put my real picture there, ever. If I want to share my photo, I'll send it to you.

What goes on in first life, Stays in first life

It's not always about harrassment, it's just about deciding who you want to know those things. I don't walk down the street handing out my dossier to everyone in RL, so I am not doing in SL. RL info is Need to Know. If you choose to put it out there, that's fine.

I've never had any issues by having stuff in my RL tab, my profile would take an age to read so i'm not sure anyone actually gets that far (all 10 picks are filled up with self-expressionist narcissism).

I get chatted up a lot, which is grand and all, I sometimes think of SL as a meat market without the meat. Although i've never quite figured out if i'm looking for a relationship or not either way i've not had one in SL for over a year, regardless i'm a very open person, and tell a lot about my RL in SL, indeed I even gave out my phone number this morning and have been texting with an SL'r today *shrug*.

I dont really see the worlds as seperate. It does dissapoint me sometimes when I meet someone who is very closed about their RL but at the same time is willing to go into every detail of my own life, I can get annoyed by that and draw a 'do not cross line'.

homosexuality is so common in SL (or maybe it's just that I hang around virtual gay bars) that I do not think this is likely to influence whether you get hit on or not, although I would say for gay girls looking for RL love in SL that's it's a minefield of mistrust, epsecially over the guys playing girls thing (most find their way to the gay scene at some point) - and maybe thats why i've ended up being so open in SL, allowing people to see me for who I am so that i'm allaying fears or mistrust.

I do remember being in a club one time with a friend and a regular there had decided that I was a guy and gave me some stick over it. I wasn't bothered because my friend knew me so well she was hardly going to be swayed by the opinion of some random stranger, consequently I dont suppose I did much to change her view of me *shrug* why would I care?

At the end of the day it doesnt really matter to me how much anyone knows. If I pass somebody in the street they know what I look like, they could even follow me home and find out where I live. It's no different online.

Ultimately the profile is just a doodling pad to express yourself, it's part of your self expression in Second Life, it makes no difference whether what is on there portrays everything about you or very little, provided what is there expresses who you are in a way that YOU are happy with. It's everybodies little piece of canvas to be expressive and artistic with.

Now that I saw your Real Life picture, that might soon change!