Thanks you to everyone who responed to this post. Also, special thanks to those who make sure that I'm fully aware that my grammar and its usage is lacking. It's topping for my cake. Thank you. Now watch the dots here as I fade into infinity.............. . . . . have a wonderful Second Life.
Cosmo
Welcome to the Second Life Forums Archive
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How much does SL effect your RL? Be Honest! |
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Cosmo Yuitza
Registered User
Join date: 4 Aug 2008
Posts: 1
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12-26-2008 18:19
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LittleMe Jewell
...........
Join date: 8 Oct 2007
Posts: 11,319
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12-26-2008 18:38
.... I'm emotinally drained, physically wasted and financially less well off than before I started living here. And live here I did. ... Good luck - if you come back, work on the balance that is right for you. _____________________
♥♥♥
-Lil Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it? ~Mark Twain~ Optimism is denial, so face the facts and move on. ♥♥♥ Lil's Yard Sale / Inventory Cleanout: http://slurl.com/secondlife/Triggerfish/52/27/22 . http://www.flickr.com/photos/littleme_jewell |
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Bella Posaner
Just say it how it is FFS
Join date: 8 May 2008
Posts: 615
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12-26-2008 18:48
SL really doesn't effect my RL much at all, when I first got into it, I spent about 5hrs on one particular day, online. RL boyfriend was unimpressed, that's the only time it's effected RL. I don't spend much time inworld these days, as it's summer time and I prefer to be with friends or at the gym.
I enjoy my RL, I have a life and I don't feel I need to substitue it for something that I consider a game. I have RL life long friends, family, pets and lovely home......not everyone is as fortunate. Today RL boyfriend is watching the cricket, so I'll go inworld shortly, it's almost 4pm here and I'm yet to go inworld. |
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Bella Posaner
Just say it how it is FFS
Join date: 8 May 2008
Posts: 615
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12-26-2008 18:53
OK, lets be honest. I spend way to much time on Sl and not enough in RL, but hey, thats just me. I know a lot of you out there have a story, so tell us how SL has changed your life. And just from my personal experiance here. I suggest you take the PC place it under the wheels of your car or truck and back over it repeatedly. Saying this and knowing how I feel about my past few months here in Sl it wouldn't stop me from going right out and buying a new one, and NOT plugging into Sl would be the hardest thing since quitting smoking. Amazing isn't it how we perfer a fantasy world where all the women are supermodels and all the men are the image of perfection. I came here from another virtual reality game not quite unlike SL. I was coaxed and prodded for months to join Sl and after about a year had passed I did join. I found that it was many times more enjoyable than what I'd previously been used to. Essentially the same things were happening but, on a personal level SL is something that shouldn't be taken lightly. Here's what I found out about Sl in the short time I've been here. First, its not a game. Its a social network filled with real people with real emotions. Its beautiful to look at and sometimes difficult to navigate, but all things considered its great vehicle to be used in many ways, some good, some questionable (never really found satisfaction in having puppet sex), its like having coffee without the caffeen (shrugs, whats the point?). I've found myself answering questions and advising people about divorce, marrage, what computer to buy, life issues, you know, things I have no business advising anyone about. I got involved with the person who brought me here, we became friends, became lovers, made a home, build a small club, learned to build and everything was good untill Reality Life kicked in and I told her I need to leave Sl because of RL issues. The RL issues were, I was totally absorbed by Sl and starting to form bad habits that were carrying over into my real life and causing me distress, anxitey, depression, loss of sleep, bad dreams, you name it. Now I have to leave Sl and I'm very sad. I'll be loosing all the friends I've made here and all the time and money I've spent not to mention loosing my SL gf to another man, which happened just this morning. (caught her in bed with him), but I'm not angry (love you hun). Sl is more like RL than we'd like to admit. We do share RL feelings and emotions which is what makes Sl such a difficult world to live in and live without. Sl is an emotional rollercoaster filled with twists and turns. If your on this ride called SL I'd like to make one last suggestion (to you personally), before I leave here, and that is to turn Sl off delete it from your hard drive, smash the pc under the wheels of your car and never look back. I'm emotinally drained, physically wasted and financially less well off than before I started living here. And live here I did. Now my story wont cover every senario but I'm interested to hear your story if you have one. Ironic isn't it, this is my first and last post. ROFL< LOL> and of course I love that TUNE hoo la la la laaaa.... Cosmo Is there no way you can balance RL and SL, I personally don't have any emotional attachment to SL. I recently gave up my beautiful Island because I have more RL stuff to do and can't justify spending money on a bunch of pixels I barely use. Why do you think you have become so absorbed in a virtual world, is there something lacking in your RL? Can you find a balance between the two? |
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Phoenixa Sol
Dance Addict
Join date: 31 Aug 2006
Posts: 315
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12-26-2008 18:56
The word in your title should be "affect", not "effect".
If your on this ride called SL I'd like to make one last suggestion (to you personally), before I leave here, and that is to turn Sl off delete it from your hard drive, smash the pc under the wheels of your car and never look back. Cosmo "you're", not "your".. in that particular context. Why would I do that when I have a completely different perspective on it than you do. I can immerse myself in the dancing I adored 30 years ago, or at least participate in something which gives me many of the same feelings, if not the complete experience. I cant see that a drunk driver will take my SL dance away, like someone did my RL dancing. 30 years is a long time to yearn to do something again. I love secondlife. _____________________
Dance, dance, dance, dance and film it!
"How I dance in secondlife" dance tutorial video, SLurls, handy links and text explanations: http://wiki.secondlife.com/wiki/User:Phoenixa_Sol Take your dance to new heights!  Free FlyDance animation just for stopping by. Buy from box vendor for $0L! http://tinyurl.com/5paevr |
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Bella Posaner
Just say it how it is FFS
Join date: 8 May 2008
Posts: 615
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12-26-2008 19:00
Don't ya love grammar Nazi’s, I mean they're so necessary, thanks for clarifying Cosmo's grammatical errors, I really couldn't understand his post
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Brenda Connolly
Un United Avatar
Join date: 10 Jan 2007
Posts: 25,000
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12-26-2008 19:01
SL is merely entertainment for me, a diversion for an occasional hour or two, so there is no problem with it fitting into my RL. Good luck in getting your RL back on track.
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Ciaran Laval
Mostly Harmless
Join date: 11 Mar 2007
Posts: 7,951
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12-26-2008 19:01
Cosmo catching the other half in bed was painful, I can see that, but you enjoy it here, you just need to take a step back and look again and realise that it's not the end of your SL world, it's rather enlightening.
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Darion Rasmuson
Norsky
Join date: 21 Dec 2007
Posts: 431
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12-26-2008 19:07
Well if SL had such a bad effect on you Cosmo, then you are indeed better off without. As for me?
I know a lot of you out there have a story, so tell us how SL has changed your life. Simple as that. |
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Phoenixa Sol
Dance Addict
Join date: 31 Aug 2006
Posts: 315
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12-26-2008 19:13
Don't ya love grammar Nazi’s, I mean they're so necessary, thanks for clarifying Cosmo's grammatical errors, I really couldn't understand his post No better time to learn for Cosmo, shame you have such a negative attitude on learning. _____________________
Dance, dance, dance, dance and film it!
"How I dance in secondlife" dance tutorial video, SLurls, handy links and text explanations: http://wiki.secondlife.com/wiki/User:Phoenixa_Sol Take your dance to new heights! Free FlyDance animation just for stopping by. Buy from box vendor for $0L! http://tinyurl.com/5paevr |
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Weston Graves
Werebeagle
Join date: 24 Mar 2007
Posts: 2,059
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12-26-2008 19:18
If it is right for you to unplug then by all means do so, but not everyone is affected this way. I must take your advice -- well, under advisement.
I for one go on SL binges then back off for a time. Sometimes I want to be in it every waking leisure hour -- but then I don't watch TV. A number of months ago I caught myself weighing the possibility of staying in SL for a weekend or entertaining a beloved RL friend. I chose the latter and it was wonderful. My only regret is that I don't read as much as used to, but that is also because I am older and go to sleep almost immediately on cracking a book. Lately I have finally finished a very large painting in RL that had been giving me fits for years - yes, years! This has inspired me to get back into the swing of things in the art/ illustration world, so SL is on the back burner for now. Sometimes I also get a little bored with it - no, not with SL, but with my own abilities to create in world, so I leave for a time and come back to it later. If my SL binges cause the dishes to pile up in the sink sometimes - well then there's audiobooks in my iPod to keep me from getting bored with housework. One other bit of hair splitting regarding the OP. I agree that SL is not a game -- but it IS if you want it to be. I say for me it is not a social network as the OP stated, but rather a surreal virtual world where I can explore other's creativity as well as my own. |
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Bella Posaner
Just say it how it is FFS
Join date: 8 May 2008
Posts: 615
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12-26-2008 19:18
No better time to learn for Cosmo, shame you have such a negative attitude on learning. Shame you're so petty. I'd call that negative. |
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SuezanneC Baskerville
Forums Rock!
Join date: 22 Dec 2003
Posts: 14,229
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12-26-2008 19:56
It is possible to only be in-world a little, or a moderate amount, or take a few months off.
If you want to take a few months off make sure you don't end up as a premium account with an unpaid balance. _____________________
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So long to these forums, the vBulletin forums that used to be at forums.secondlife.com. I will miss them. I can be found on the web by searching for "SuezanneC Baskerville", or go to http://www.google.com/profiles/suezanne - http://lindenlab.tribe.net/ created on 11/19/03. Members: Ben, Catherine, Colin, Cory, Dan, Doug, Jim, Philip, Phoenix, Richard, Robin, and Ryan - |
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Sylvia Trilling
Flying Tribe
Join date: 2 Oct 2006
Posts: 1,117
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12-26-2008 21:05
SL has been hugely positive for my real life. I have my own business and I am making a real life living doing artistic work. That is good for my confidence and something I am proud to tell people in rl. Because of SL I have learned a great deal about computer graphics.
Having my own SL business gives me flexible work time so I can do my rl water color and oil painting. I also sing in an excellent church choir and go to paintdancing events in Seattle. SL is like real life, in that it is a mirror of who you are. You get out of it what you put into it. I get annoyed with those who make assumptions that SL is bad or fantasy is bad or SL takes away from one's real life. It can do that, but that is NOT everyones experience and it most emphatically is not mine. My business sells to a fantasy market. The work and skill and smarts it takes to succeed at that are most certainly real. _____________________
http://www.throughlinedesign.com/
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LittleMe Jewell
...........
Join date: 8 Oct 2007
Posts: 11,319
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12-26-2008 21:45
Do not have LL cancel your account - many that say they are leaving come back and most do eventually find the proper balance. If you leave and you are currently premium, downgrade to basic before your dues come due again. Your account will stay there forever whether you log in or not.
_____________________
♥♥♥
-Lil Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it? ~Mark Twain~ Optimism is denial, so face the facts and move on. ♥♥♥ Lil's Yard Sale / Inventory Cleanout: http://slurl.com/secondlife/Triggerfish/52/27/22 . http://www.flickr.com/photos/littleme_jewell |
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Czari Zenovka
I've Had it With "PC"!
Join date: 3 May 2007
Posts: 3,688
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12-26-2008 22:21
Hi, Cosmo! Your post indicates that you are really hurting and I feel for you.
I too came here from other online venues. I've spent approximately 20 years online in IRC chat channels, Active World, EverQuest with a bit of AOL and Yahoo thrown in. I was always drawn back to IRC because that is where most of my online social connections were, some dating as far back as 12 years. I am a passionate person who often lets my heart rule my head and have experienced many of the same emotions on IRC, a text only medium, that I have on SL. I think people are themselves wherever they go. What is that expression: wherever you go, there you are. The main difference for me from IRC chat and even EverQuest is the ability to create - from customizing one's avatar, to decorating a home; perhaps building one or starting a business. There are opportunities to do things one enjoys but perhaps can't in RL for whatever reason. I spend more time than I should in SL primarily because I live alone and have chosen at this time to not date. However, I'm realizing lately that I *do* need to get out and be with RL people - return to church, re-connect with friends and former co-workers I lost touch with when I became ill 3 years ago. For me, I see SL as a great addition to my life, as long as I can reign in my "all or nothing" temperament. I'm emotinally drained, physically wasted and financially less well off than before I started living here. I have experienced the emotionally drained part and am taking steps to correct that. I'm not physically wasted, but I have gained some pounds I don't need from sitting in front of the PC too long and need to start going out for walks. Financially - no difference as I don't spend much money really. I appreciated your viewpoints, Cosmo, and would join other posters in encouraging you to just step back for awhile, enjoy the real world, but don't cancel your account (or step down to basic if you're premium). Some time away may cause you to look at SL with new eyes when you return. Take care. _____________________
*Czari's Attic* ~ Relive the fun of exploring an attic for hidden treasures!
http://slurl.com/secondlife/Rakhiot/82/99/111 During times of universal deceit, telling the truth becomes a revolutionary act.- George Orwell |
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Phoenixa Sol
Dance Addict
Join date: 31 Aug 2006
Posts: 315
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12-27-2008 00:11
Shame you're so petty. I'd call that negative. Have any opinion you want. I wasn't the one swinging the "nazi" label around, and using an incorrect apostrophe denoting possession. _____________________
Dance, dance, dance, dance and film it!
"How I dance in secondlife" dance tutorial video, SLurls, handy links and text explanations: http://wiki.secondlife.com/wiki/User:Phoenixa_Sol Take your dance to new heights! Free FlyDance animation just for stopping by. Buy from box vendor for $0L! http://tinyurl.com/5paevr |
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Drivin Sideways
100% recycled pixels
Join date: 30 Oct 2007
Posts: 502
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12-27-2008 00:23
6
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Cinders Vale
Registered User
Join date: 2 Dec 2006
Posts: 272
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12-27-2008 02:13
I was brought into SL by friends from MYST:MOUL and I am very glad they did. I usually come in for 2 - 3 hours per day. Well, up until the Peace Globe Grid Wide Hunt started. lolol
When I first came in-world, I was lucky enough to find the Cancer Survivors group sponsored by the American Cancer Society. Last August I hit the 5 year mark! So, for me this virtual world is a form of recreation and a place to come to for support. I do walk every day in RL, go to work, do the chores around the apartment. With all the snow we've been getting here in the Pacific Northwest, I'm also getting a lot of exercise with a snow shovel. Take a break, get some distance, and just relax. Go do something fun or silly. We will be here if you decide to come back. |
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Bella Posaner
Just say it how it is FFS
Join date: 8 May 2008
Posts: 615
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12-27-2008 02:22
IWith all the snow we've been getting here in the Pacific Northwest, I'm also getting a lot of exercise with a snow shovel. Take a break, get some distance, and just relax. Go do something fun or silly. We will be here if you decide to come back. Aww I wish we had snow here, it never snows where I live. |
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Phil Deakins
Prim Savers = low prims
Join date: 17 Jan 2007
Posts: 9,537
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12-27-2008 02:30
No better time to learn for Cosmo, shame you have such a negative attitude on learning. _____________________
Prim Savers - almost 1000 items of superbly crafted, top quality, very low prim furniture, and all at amazingly low prices.
http://slurl.com/secondlife/Seymour/213/120/251/ |
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Pserendipity Daniels
Assume sarcasm as default
Join date: 21 Dec 2006
Posts: 8,839
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12-27-2008 02:43
Don't ya love grammar Nazi’s, I mean they're so necessary, thanks for clarifying Cosmo's grammatical errors, I really couldn't understand his post Pep (The force of an argument is proportional to the accuracy with which it is expressed) _____________________
Hypocrite lecteur, — mon semblable, — mon frère!
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Pserendipity Daniels
Assume sarcasm as default
Join date: 21 Dec 2006
Posts: 8,839
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12-27-2008 02:48
Ah but you're not a teacher. If you were, you'd have explained why it's "affect" and not "effect", and why it's "you're" and not "your". In other words, your corrections were completely unhelpful. Maybe you're best suited to sticking to the subject. Pep (You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink) _____________________
Hypocrite lecteur, — mon semblable, — mon frère!
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Phil Deakins
Prim Savers = low prims
Join date: 17 Jan 2007
Posts: 9,537
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12-27-2008 02:52
My teachers used to tell me to look things up for homework. Pep (You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink) _____________________
Prim Savers - almost 1000 items of superbly crafted, top quality, very low prim furniture, and all at amazingly low prices.
http://slurl.com/secondlife/Seymour/213/120/251/ |
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Pserendipity Daniels
Assume sarcasm as default
Join date: 21 Dec 2006
Posts: 8,839
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12-27-2008 02:54
<snip>I am a passionate person who often lets my heart rule my head<snip> Pep (It *is* a game; RL is a game, so SL *must* be) _____________________
Hypocrite lecteur, — mon semblable, — mon frère!
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