Is it just me..

This was pretty much my experience (speaking of SL) and I'm still kind of hurt/angered/irked by it. I was exclusively with one guy for almost 2 1/2 years. Sept. 21st would have been the second anniversary of our official partnership.

I thought we had a great SL. A lovely home, both loved to explore and go dancing, similar interests. However, after about a year (and for personal reasons), I put a stop to the intimate pose balls. "Coincidentally" he then didn't come online quite as often, suddenly became "busy" during the weekend times he used to come on, etc. I discussed this with him exhaustively and he maintains his spending less time online had nothing to do with the pose ball moratorium, but I find the timing more than "coincidental."

I can assure the OP she's not the only one in her situation. I have recently gone to Sweethearts, Phats, Bogarts, and some smaller places and end up sitting like a bump on a log. The guys seem to gravitate to the "slutzilla" types...if they ask anyone to dance at all.

I enjoy having someone in SL to go dancing with, but I may be going it alone.

Question for you and any other male reading:

I know it's possible for a woman to be extremely fond of frequent non-virtual sex---and yet find SL-avatar sex to be comically anti-erotic.

Is that something that's NOT possible for a man? Seriously, all strong-sex-drive guys find the sight of SL avatars in action to be Hot, and not silly?

I say throw your cares and concerns outta the window and sleep with the guy. Or several of them. It'll add to your rich experiences in sl and its fun, too.

We drive them caaarrrazeeee.
Lol most men have an erection don't they when they see what goes on in sl? All the men I know in sl appear to have dingdongs from watching what we do.

I see the lack of oxygen on the strange planet your mind inhabits has left you a bit disoriented and delusional as usual.

It's a well kept secret that men are turned on even by looking at a forked stick. You are pretty much wasting your time and money trying to pretty yourself up for us.

Pep (It's a genetic thing; you girls wouldn't understand.)

Hmn, I haven't expressed what I was trying to say very clearly.

...I wasn't saying anything like 'men have stronger sex drives than women', which seems to be the interpretation being placed on my earlier post.

What I was asking about was the effect of viewing SL-avatars doing sex stuff, as distinguished from viewing real humans or photos of real humans or even more realistic avatars from other platforms.

For me the sight of SL avatars doing sex is ANTI-erotic*, whereas the sight of humans (or the sight of photos of humans) doing sex tends to be quite erotic.

So I was just wondering if this reaction of mine (to the SL avatars) is a rare one, and whether that type of reaction is more likely to be found in women (even if they have strong sex drives), and substantially less likely to be found in men.


*in that it tends to make me laugh

I find that it makes me laught too if I watch for any ammount of time. Mostly I am looking at the chat log though. I guess maybe the guys get off on it? Dunno, but I'm usually reading the action, not watching it.

EVERYTHING makes me laugh.

Pep (RL and SL. )

PS Since when is laughter anti-erotic?

I think you just have really low standards.

It is alright, Eli. If I want to know what a man thinks I will ask you or one of the other men here. If I need to know what a snot nosed boy thinks .. well, that will never happen so why worry about him?

I was actually thinking of you specifically when I wrote my post, hitting on anything that moved in the forums that looked as if it might be female.

Pep ("Low standards"? You would be the expert on that , hitched up to 3Ring. )

Still delusional, eh?

Pep (Is this a rl photo of you? )

Jealous much??? You can't go a whole day without mentioning 3Ring. I dare you to try.

Hey Evangeline

Someone else in this thread suggested it, and I re-iterate: try one of the avie dating services. I use AVMatch.com and I have recently found someone who matches pretty much exactly what I am looking for in a friend / girlfriend.

Just be completely honest as to what you want (which you have been) and good things will happen.

Good Luck!!

I agree 100%. In fact in the old days (2 years ago) my former partner and I were out pose ball shopping. There was one set that was just so stupid/silly looking to me that I about died laughing....on private voice. I figured my partner was thinking the same thing until he said, "Ummm, that wasn't the reaction I was going for."

I think Pep is right (oh gosh, I just KNOW that's going on a sig)...about the male sex drive. I have a fairly high sex drive for a female...REAL LIFE. Ah well...back to finishing the Steam Hunt.

Well, the cliche is that men are more "visual" in this regard than women. I've no idea if this is true or not, but the evidence HERE seems to bear it out.

A really really good sex pose set can be mildly erotic for the first 30 seconds. Then it goes into a loop, and . . . a half hour or so later . . . starts looking not merely silly, but actually rather painful.

Most sex poses I've seen, however, are merely ridiculous, dull, and mechanical, with little or no suggestion of real intimacy or tenderness. (Some of the Bits and Bobs ones seem to be exceptions.)

As I think I've said before, and as others have already suggested, it's all in the language. If a man is reasonably articulate, sensitive, and imaginative with THAT, he will go far (so to speak).

Boys, please quit posting while you're under the influence of testosterone. Obviously, women aren't the only ones who get "hormonal".

I'm in the same boat as you are - although I'm rather new to SL - I am looking for someone to 'do' things with, dancing - shopping etc, however I've given up trying to find a 'male' partner to do these things with, as the good ones all seem to be already partnered up! I've one good friend (female) on SL and we hang out alot - do shopping, check out new places, however she is not into jazz music or the formal dress dance thing - which I happen to love - so maybe one day I will be lucky enough to find a guy in SL to do those things with - I keep my eyes open , even when not actively looking, maybe in Sl as in RL all the good guys are taking or gay!

Is Rhonda a "boy" then?

Pep (I *thought* they were linebacker's thighs. )

I meant that *your* hormones are making *you* post the way you did.

I might suggest that men *are* more imaginative (or their imagination perhaps can be provoked more easily) but I think it is simply that women lack the concentration powers we have (you might call it a multi-tasking ability, and make a virtue out of a necessity) . . .

Pep ( . . . and start thinking about painting the ceiling after about 30 seconds. )

Ah, you must have missed the bit where I posted sensibly and then Eli and Rhonda started an ad hominem derail to which I responded . . .

Pep ( . . . with my usual humour and disregard for restraint. )

This is not up to standard. If you're going to troll, at least do it cleverly. Have some tea and try again.

Certainly true for me. Words do it where pictures fail.

Here we go, Pep, have a few minutes of quiet time with this little cutie and come back nicer