My Plan to Take Over Second Life

For sometime now I have been developing a ten phase plan to take over Second Life. As I complete each phase of my plan I will post the next phase to be implemented here in the forums. This will give each of you a chance to study the phase and determine your fate and your future as I begin my Second Life World Domination.

My motive of course is money and power.
My base of operations will be clubs and casinos.
My minions will be the Noobie empire.

Here are the phases I have implemented thus far and are near completion:

Phase I. Disrupt the community and cause dissention among fellow man. Start by distracting the public with injecting artificial crisis and mock wars. SL residents will fight, argue, and grieve each other on the future of SL community development, various land issues, and technical interface improvements. I will also dump enough gelatin into the Second Life oceans and rivers to solidify them for future hibernation use.

Phase II. Fund a world domination bid by opening a chain of clubs and casinos. Overtake the events calendar and flood it with Tringo, Bingo, Slingo and Sexy AV Contests. End all educational classes in order that the Noob Empire does not gain knowledge and experience if they are to be my minions. End paying stipens and hosting funds to the residents forcing them to seek other finaancial solutions. Constantly disrupt the value of the Linden dollar and the land values in order to place further financial stress and burden on the citizens of Second Life.

Residents, citizens of SL. I have begun implementing Phase III. It will be a crucial phase in where some will begin to take notice of my immenient take over. The weak of mind will not notice any disruption in their daily lives or assume that this is a joke. I implore you to study the phases I have implemented so far and you determine if its real or if its margarine.

If you wish to meet with me to discuss all that I have planned, you can find me in game in Sakai at my club.

Again, I will post Phase III here soon. The wheels are in motion and its just a matter of time before I have succeeded in Second Life World Domination.

Does any Phase include pie for everyone ?

You fail to realize that someone has planted this seed in you in order for you to have these desires. All is going according to plan.

Could I have the lime jello in my ocean around Ross? And the cherry in Columbia.

k tx!

Actually, if you don't mind, I prefer butter.

Go ahead, Laugh, joke. We shall see who has the last laugh.

It's occurred to me a number of times that many of the stresses and strains in SL are all fake, that either players who are manipulative set them up, or perhaps the Lindens are really the social engineers in white lab coats we imagine mauhahaahah and are experimenting on us.

The fake campaign against the 10 percent land bonus, the fake campaign against land owners that advertise on the land list (not fake in the result of crippling the advertising, fake in its supposed crocodile tears for alleged scammed newbies), the fake furry war started over the fake spiked head, and a million other fake things that just feel...well, fake.

But it's important to fight fake wars sometimes just so that people like you can see the correlation of forces and realize you may attempt to take over the world but others will stop you.

Yeah, be careful of campaigns dressed as stress and strain in SL.

Especially when the authors use "we" liberally, as if they were speaking for the masses.

Prospective world dominators are strongly urged to put domination announcements through a spell check procedure before making them public.

You will be the first to go. I have acquired various elimination techniques and procedures. I have a special one in mind for you.

Does it involve sharks with frickin' laser beams attached to their heads? Because if it does, I gotta tell you that trick never works...

which step is the one on how to take out the hippos?

If you will agree to march all of these lemmings into the (virtual) sea, and exercise your dominion as some jack-booted Neptunian Charlie Chaplin among the coral reefs, you may have SL.

No Buster Keaton reference?

*FROWNS*

"I've simply been brought up by being knocked down." ~~~ Buster Keaton


I know Buster Keatoin, he is a friend of mine, and you sir are NO Buster Keaton!!!

If I can't eat pie, I ain't joining your revolution.

-Ghoti

does this mean Prok has competition?

Kilroy. Try though you may, you will never wrest control of Second Life from me.

Don't try it Kilroy... the guns are pointed at you this very second.

Aimee, have you ever wondered after all this time how you managed to keep those beautiful wings of yours powered to flap so much? I gave that to you --- and I can taketh away.

Wonder what Kilroy is going to try to do tommorrow night?

The same thing he does every night?

NARF!!

I confess, Kilroy Kilian was actually our little artificial intelligence experiment gone awry. It escaped into the wild and I can see is now posting to forums, albeit without using a spell checker. We are working hard to get it back in its box, but it's like trying to herd butterflies. Funny how you give these creations a little knowledge and the first thing they go for is world domination *shakes head*. I'm working on our next creation to seduce Kilroy, thereby rendering it an ineffective virtual blob, to be swept away with the next SL patch. Our apologies to all who have been affected. We will make reparations for any damages through the Kilroy AV, so please contact us through that AV if you wish to file a claim. Be aware, you may get messages saying to are not owed money or land, but that is just because Kilroy is not back in the box yet. Over time, each claim will be reviewed and processed in the order received. Please ignore any future messages from Kilroy, as we are aware of the problem and are working hard to address the issue. Again, we thank you for your indulgence in this matter *warm smile*.

Haha. Ignorant Fools. Don't you know that all power lies with the last newby whom entered Esselle.