Community Standards: Tolerance

LOL I thought most of them did

I'm offended. I suck and I'm not gay. How dare you clump me in with <insert random cliche here>

Clever, Eggy.

Seriously though, no. Not all gay men do. Being sexually attracted to your own sex and engaging in anal or oral sex with members of your own sex are far, far different things. Not all gay people have sex, and when they do, not all of them necessarily do the same things.

For that matter, not all people who have sexual contact with members of their own sex are gay. Homosexuality is strictly a sexual attraction to someone of the same sex. That's it.

I for one think LL does an excellent job of discouraging vocally judgmental people who accomplish nothing in the world save for making other people feel bad about themselves.

Since I have been here, LL has delt with several bigots, some folks who are prejudiced / hostile to people who like to dress up like animals, a couple of stray nut-jobs, and now Jon.

The world is a better place now IMO.

Thank you LL.

I also wish to thank the individual LL employees involved with the conception, decision trees, and execution of the afore mentioned police actions.

I know Cat
My best friend IRL is gay, and so are a lot of my friends in SL. At first it was quite a shock, since back then I didnt know anything about homosexuality but heck, I wasnt gonna stop talking to my best friend just because he likes guys. It's been quite a ride. We have had some interesting arguments about what being gay is all about, what "gay pride" really means and all that.
But thanks for posting anyway. Maybe Jon will find that insightful, if he is still reading this.

it's different for a member of the group to use the term than for a non-member.

and homosexuals don't agree with the derogative implications of "I find feminity in males to be 'gay'"

on par with
- declaring gay menas less than human?
- going to hell?
- should be sent to jail for life?



it's not a children's game. it's a fact of life. consider who can or cannot say "nigger", and i do know gay men who use the word "fag" and "faggot".

the connotation is different because of group membership.



i'm not saying his actions are unintentional. i am very skeptical of his protestations of innocence - this based on observing his behavior.

and again, if it perpetuates the societal oppression, derogation, or discrimination of group of people - homosexuals, women, minorities, mentally ill, etc. - then it's hatespeech. it is hareful. intention doesn't have to enter in.

Its different? Bullpucky! Now you are implying a double standard. None of my gay friends have ever objected to me using the word to describe them or their lifestyle.

ask them it would be okay for you to say "that's gay." when you want to something is "disagreeably feminine."

it isn't the word itself, per se, that is the problem.

i'm not saying people can't use the word "gay" in a positive fashion.

i'm saying the connotation changes through context and group membership.

life is full of doublestandards. the upperclass white man that goes around saying "nigger" is harlem is likely to get assaulted. the black man that does so, is not.

it isn't always the words themselves that are problematic, but how the words are used.

Dev... I think they most likely don't object as you're using the word the way it should be: a (non derogatory) means of describing your homosexual friends. Let's face it: homosexual is a mouthful. No pun intended.

I see what His is saying: if you're using 'gay' to describe something in a negative manner, it's not OK.

Personal note: I remember when I was in school the absolute worst thing you could be called was either: gay or faggot. So, there is some validity to gay having the ability to carry a negative connotation, depending on how the word is used.

When an apology is sincerely given from the heart, it's an act of love.

Jon would not Christ be pleased?

i've had a non smoker wish me a speedy death when I lit up once night outside no less.

I can quote other smoking nazi's but whats the point.

Human beings can be arseholes no doubt and for every act there is a prejudice to accompany it.



Again I say Bullsh*t... I not only know gay men who use those words but use them in a highly derogatory way. Words aren't exclusive to groups. Anyway you cut it the same words mean the same things no matter who says them be it group member or not.

I can understand this... he isn't innocent...who among us is...


Intention has everything to do with it. A child who knows no better will repeat what it hears ...the child has no intent therefore the child isn't hateful but ignorant.

You have to intend to be hateful its not an accidental thing. You have to have intent and presence of mind to be hateful. Someone saying these words we've been speaking of and not understanding why they arent appropriate is just plain and simple ignorant.

My grandfather was of an age that the "n" word was used without care. I constantly heard him say " nigger". I truly thought my grandfather hated black people.

Years later at my grandparents house my grandfather was crying and that is something I never saw. My father pulled me aside and told me that my grandfathers best friend of 30 years died that morning....he then showed me a picture of them at work. To my surprise my grandfathers best friend was a black man.

When my grandfather used the "N" word he was plain and simple ignorant...he was brought up that way and learned traits sometimes take generations to dissapear.

When the KKK uses the "n" word there is no doubt that its hate speech.

have you asked your friends aobut using "gay" like jon did? ask them if it's okay for someone like jon so say what they say.



no. i didn't. and i rather think that bears out my point.

what i mean is not construed simply by what the words what the words mean. context is important, and intention and group membership is part of context.

when a friend tells you, "you idiot," the sting is different when an enemy tells you, "you idiot."

* * *

please forgive me as i severely mangle your post...


but he protests he is. and that also matters. he commits offense, and those offended by him tell him so, and yet he says he's done nothing wrong. in fact he has continued in his offense.

what does that say about his intentions?



i suspect on this point we will have to aggree to disagree. institutionalized hatred is unintentionally supported.

but even if i am wrong...

it appeasr he intends to (and has) continue in his actions and attitudes that hurt and offend an identifiable group of people.

he is no longer ignorant.



re: your grandfather

the curious thing about prejudice is that having a friend in a group that one is prejudiced against does not always or even usually reduce the generalized prejudice. if you insist i can cite you the studies that support this finding.

edited to fix a quote and some grammar

Isn't that reason enough to just stop posting then? To say "I don't hate you, but I reserve the right to be disgusted by you and preach down to you" That's really nice to know that you can control your gag reflex enough to share our space. It isn't going to win you many friends here. A lot of people have no respect for the opinions of Saint Paul, believe that he was a hate-filled spiteful liar and opportunist who injected himself into Christianity like a dirty virus, so spouting his platitudes just means that you cannot reason or think for yourself. Maybe you should be logging into Baptist Life, instead of Second Life.

I HATE being referred to as gay, personally, but that's just me.

That's because you AREN'T gay. You tend to be rather grumpy.