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RL relationships from SL ones |
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Rickard Roentgen
Renaissance Punk
Join date: 4 Apr 2004
Posts: 1,869
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11-12-2004 12:40
You're WRONG! _____________________
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Lita Kothari
Cynically Skeptical
Join date: 12 Nov 2003
Posts: 122
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11-12-2004 12:49
Hikaru, my lovely partner in SL, and I met in RL and we are very much in love
I've also met some SL friends in RL.. and we pretty much sat around gossipping like we do in SL.  I'm actually at Pendari's house right now visiting her as I write this.. The other day I met up with Purple. Earlier this month, I flew to San Diego and partied with Hobbes, Kate Hanks, Nala Galatea, and Trinity Serpentine.  They are really cool people and would be good RL friends if we lived closer or had more money to be travelling to meet each other all the time.  |
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David Valentino
Nicely Wicked
Join date: 1 Jan 2004
Posts: 2,941
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11-12-2004 13:07
I met my kind-of-ex wife online years and years ago on the fore-runner to AOL. It was called Q-Link and was for Commadore 64 & 128 users
. We've been on and off for the past 18 years and remain good friends and have a wonderful son together.I've also had a few lovers that I've met online, and a few RL friendships that started online. However, I've yet to actually physically meet anyone from SL, though I've spoken on the phone to a few, and there are a few that I would love to be able to really hug.  _____________________
David Lamoreaux
Owner - Perilous Pleasures and Extreme Erotica Gallery |
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Eggy Lippmann
Wiktator
Join date: 1 May 2003
Posts: 7,939
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11-12-2004 13:12
I met my gf on IRC. Turns out we grew up in the same neighborhood and went to the same high school. But since she is 3 years older than me we never met.
We've been together for almost 5 years and we are very happy and planning on marrying as soon as i can get my ass out of college and start earning non-trivial amounts of money. _____________________
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Damien Fate
Goofy designer
Join date: 6 Nov 2003
Posts: 634
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11-12-2004 13:19
...planning on marrying.... grats _____________________
Mirada.smartHUD - The new way to control your avatar and the world around you - In Mirada, Hairspray (22,63,51) or find me in world!
You want me to be Semi Serious? Well that's ok, I'm almost half semi serious 50% of the time. |
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Bakuzelas Khan
Me
Join date: 16 Mar 2004
Posts: 129
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11-12-2004 13:30
My guess is that the insult hurlers are sucking sour grapes. Perhaps they can't hook up with anyone (online or not) and take their frustrations out on people who have been sucessful. This statement is really pretty rude. Mostly because I didn't read anyone in this thread hurling insults, and saw some posts of dissenting opinion. I met my rl partner online, but have no interest at all in meeting anyone else I meet online irl. I just have no interest in it. I don't see how this would imply that I am unable to hook up with another person, or somehow make me a failure in life. _____________________
No, Dad, why don't YOU play the pan pipes? Playing the pan pipes is YOUR dream, NOT mine!
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Madiera Westerburg
waiting for apocolypse :D
Join date: 6 Apr 2004
Posts: 836
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11-12-2004 13:50
i dont think olympias statement had anything to do with posters in this thread....as for YOU eggy....you are marrying ME...remember? gah could we get the brainwashers back please...eggys somehow gotten deprogrammed!
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"Unfortunately you cant wipe them out of existence... merely hide the drivel they have to spew"- Kris Ritter
If the lord was handing out bacterial infections for sinning, you'd be at the free clinic all the time. just when I manage to convince myself I'm a superior being, I walk into a door |
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Olympia Rebus
Muse of Chaos
Join date: 22 Feb 2004
Posts: 1,831
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11-12-2004 13:57
i dont think olympia's statement had anything to do with posters in this thread. Correct. I was refering to people who actually were insulting others about online relationships- something I have seen here and there. Wasn't refering to people who weren't into online relationships or didn't think they were a good idea. _____________________
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Camille Serpentine
Eater of the Dead
Join date: 6 Oct 2003
Posts: 1,236
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11-12-2004 14:21
How can spending time online (in my case several months) be rushing more than spending RL time together though? I think that most likely people who rush online prolly rush RL too - and prolly get their heart broken more so because they have already had that RL contact. Online I do not see that danger. If someone starts to bother you or becomes undesirable you can simply stop communicating with them. No clothes to give back, etc. Not flaming you here or upset in the least. As I stated in my post above I wonder why these relationships are viewed the way they are by a lot of folks, and am interested in hearing those views. Sorry, I didn't explain fully. I've had 2 good friends meet people online, pour their hearts out to the online person, and seemingly they pour out their life stories too. Yet when they met the online person in RL they forgot to mention the wife, the kids, or the psychiatric problems. I'm not saying people don't mess up in RL too, just the ability to decieve the other person seems greatly amplified online. I do also know people who've had very good relationships from meeting people online, I'm one of them, but when I did, I kept it very slow once I met them in RL, just in case things weren't what they seemed. _____________________
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hellokitty Madison
Registered User
Join date: 4 Jun 2004
Posts: 8
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11-12-2004 14:27
I met the love of my life online on a game called ultima online that I had played for 3 years. We are now engaged and will soon marry after being together after 4 years, He works out of state so online is one of the ways we stay in touch> I think its great to meet freinds online, and in no way does it mean we can't meet them in rl its just a better way to learn more about others who are also interested in the same things like virtual worlds :}, anyways take care all.. There are a few dateing services in sl I know misty use to have one as well as palamma,im not sure if they are still running them. Any single freinds I have I personally always suggest to come to sl, there are great people here. What a great way to get to know people and build freindships from people all over the world its awesome.
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Nolan Nash
Frischer Frosch
Join date: 15 May 2003
Posts: 7,141
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11-12-2004 14:27
Correct. I was refering to people who actually were insulting others about online relationships- something I have seen here and there. Wasn't refering to people who weren't into online relationships or didn't think they were a good idea. That was also the meaning I was conveying as well, I have heard some very harsh statements the past couple years about this from both RL and online people. Usually just in a conversation and not directed at me specifically, however some relatives have voiced their disapproval directly. For instance, I was at dinner with some friends, one of my friends partners went on and on about what *losers* people who meet online and why. I sat there silently. I guess I should have said something but I let it go. Anyway, this thread was started by Aaron for people to state there SL/RL relationships and we shouldn't discourage them to do so with horror stories! Sorry Aaron for threadjacking... Let's hear more stories with happy (so far ) endings!_____________________
“Time's fun when you're having flies.” ~Kermit
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Nolan Nash
Frischer Frosch
Join date: 15 May 2003
Posts: 7,141
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11-12-2004 14:35
Sorry, I didn't explain fully. I've had 2 good friends meet people online, pour their hearts out to the online person, and seemingly they pour out their life stories too. Yet when they met the online person in RL they forgot to mention the wife, the kids, or the psychiatric problems. I'm not saying people don't mess up in RL too, just the ability to decieve the other person seems greatly amplified online. I do also know people who've had very good relationships from meeting people online, I'm one of them, but when I did, I kept it very slow once I met them in RL, just in case things weren't what they seemed. Yes, unfortunately this does happen. I have a female friend that was nearly raped by a psycho she met online. He staged his car breaking down to get her alone. There are risks, but let me say this, most victims of violent crime are harmed by RL people that they live with or know, like a spouse, lover, friend, relative, turf disputes, etc., that knew the victim. Unfortunately it's nearly impossible sometimes to pick up on the whackos, no matter where you meet them. _____________________
“Time's fun when you're having flies.” ~Kermit
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Gemini Galatea
Pixel Sculptor
Join date: 1 May 2004
Posts: 200
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11-12-2004 14:54
Some people laugh at the fact that my hubby and I will exchange iChat messages when we're lying in bed with our respective laptops on, but to us it is as natural as a verbal exchange. I trust my fingers to come out with what I mean much more than I trust my tongue OMG someone else that does this ! LOL.. my hubby (Scorpio Galatea) and I do this all the time, we're in separate rooms when we're online and it's SO much easier to Yahoo him or IM him with *are you making tea?* than get up.. We met online in 1996 in a Compuserve chatroom, then we went to Worldsaway where we used to see each other before we got together rw. We got married in 2001. We have kinda separate lives in SL, but lots of fun. _____________________
I get *MY* marching orders from Pony Linden. He talks dirty to me and says "Everything is ok, daddy is here now" |
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Torley Linden
Enlightenment!
Join date: 15 Sep 2004
Posts: 16,530
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11-12-2004 15:19
When you are with someone
and you both are there for each other looking longingly into each other's eyes (and it is safe, sane, and consensual) and the world has more love and you are both happy It is GOOD. _____________________
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Lisse Livingston
Mentor/Instructor/Greeter
Join date: 16 May 2004
Posts: 1,130
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11-12-2004 15:56
We got married in 2001. We have kinda separate lives in SL, but lots of fun. You know, you're right. We got married in 1995, and since then we've lived fairly separate online lives - even in SL we rarely hang out at the same events or have the same friends. We still help each other with builds etc., but the urge to have an online relationship at the same time as our offline one has diminished! _____________________
Land Developer, Builder and Real Estate Agent Come to my events! Sundays at 10:00 am: Texturing Contest Tuesdays at 5:00 pm: Land 101 and at 7:00 pm: Trivia Thursdays at 7:00 pm: Land 101 Fridays at 7:00 pm: Primtionary (Other events occasionally scheduled) Read my LiveJournal! Visit my Livingston Properties web site for your Real Estate and Building needs! |
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Lisse Livingston
Mentor/Instructor/Greeter
Join date: 16 May 2004
Posts: 1,130
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11-12-2004 15:59
I think I get worried about friends who meet their true-love online. If only because they seem to rush into it very quickly w/o seeming to know much about the person in actuality. I've known Random Twilight online since 1992 (platonically!) We first met when he stayed at our house for a con in July 2004 (platonically!) However, my husband had met his wife for lunch a few years ago (platonically!) That's about as unrushed as you can get _____________________
Land Developer, Builder and Real Estate Agent Come to my events! Sundays at 10:00 am: Texturing Contest Tuesdays at 5:00 pm: Land 101 and at 7:00 pm: Trivia Thursdays at 7:00 pm: Land 101 Fridays at 7:00 pm: Primtionary (Other events occasionally scheduled) Read my LiveJournal! Visit my Livingston Properties web site for your Real Estate and Building needs! |
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Nolan Nash
Frischer Frosch
Join date: 15 May 2003
Posts: 7,141
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11-12-2004 16:14
When you are with someone and you both are there for each other looking longingly into each other's eyes (and it is safe, sane, and consensual) and the world has more love and you are both happy It is GOOD. Nice sentiment. _____________________
“Time's fun when you're having flies.” ~Kermit
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Solitaire Guillaume
I feel renewed already
Join date: 10 Dec 2002
Posts: 61
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11-12-2004 17:00
Sorry, I didn't explain fully. I've had 2 good friends meet people online, pour their hearts out to the online person, and seemingly they pour out their life stories too. Yet when they met the online person in RL they forgot to mention the wife, the kids, or the psychiatric problems. LOL thanks for the laugh Camille _____________________
ROMEO I dream'd a dream to-night. MERCUTIO And so did I.
ROMEO Well, what was yours? MERCUTIO That dreamers often lie. |
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Eddie Escher
Builder of things...
Join date: 11 Jul 2003
Posts: 461
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11-12-2004 17:24
Fallingwater and I will be getting married in RL in about 10 hours!
We met in SL 11 months ago. I've visited her every 2 or 3 months since, and she moved to England to live with me a month ago. Life is GOOD!!!!! |
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Lisse Livingston
Mentor/Instructor/Greeter
Join date: 16 May 2004
Posts: 1,130
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11-12-2004 17:27
Fallingwater and I will be getting married in RL in about 10 hours! We want pictures! Congrats! *toasts the happy couple* _____________________
Land Developer, Builder and Real Estate Agent Come to my events! Sundays at 10:00 am: Texturing Contest Tuesdays at 5:00 pm: Land 101 and at 7:00 pm: Trivia Thursdays at 7:00 pm: Land 101 Fridays at 7:00 pm: Primtionary (Other events occasionally scheduled) Read my LiveJournal! Visit my Livingston Properties web site for your Real Estate and Building needs! |
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Lordfly Digeridoo
Prim Orchestrator
Join date: 21 Jul 2003
Posts: 3,628
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11-12-2004 17:30
Fallingwater and I will be getting married in RL in about 10 hours! !!!! Congratulations! May your future childroons be as creative as you two are Getting back to the topic at hand... I don't see online relationships as being any more silly than real life ones. I'm pretty cynical about both, though (people rushing in too fast.. just a few months ago a friend of mine got engaged, then married, within a week, with some dude leaving for the navy for at least 2 years... they've been dating for less than 5 months... who does that?), but when I hear about the "good" stories (eddie and fallingwater, damien and washu), it does make me smile and have some sort of hope for the geeks of the world to unite and procreate faster than everyone else.  Sadly single, LF _____________________
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http://www.lordfly.com/ http://www.twitter.com/lordfly http://www.plurk.com/lordfly |
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Eggy Lippmann
Wiktator
Join date: 1 May 2003
Posts: 7,939
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11-12-2004 17:32
Regarding the marrying thing I should probably point out that, well, it's not that big a deal for me. It's always been implicit. It's not like in the movies when you pull out a ring and pop the question, it's just what girlfriends are for, you know, I wouldnt be with her if marriage wasnt looming in the horizon. I dont know if I am making myself clear here =)
All I've ever wanted in life was to be a husband and a father. _____________________
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Torley Linden
Enlightenment!
Join date: 15 Sep 2004
Posts: 16,530
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11-12-2004 17:34
Fallingwater and I will be getting married in RL in about 10 hours! We met in SL 11 months ago. I've visited her every 2 or 3 months since, and she moved to England to live with me a month ago. Life is GOOD!!!!! OMG!!! THIS IS SO EXCITING!!! I WISH YOU TWO ALL THE BEST AS YOU JOIN INTO ONE IN LOVE AND LIFE... AND OMG... HAPPY MARRIAGE TO YOU!!! _____________________
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Madiera Westerburg
waiting for apocolypse :D
Join date: 6 Apr 2004
Posts: 836
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11-12-2004 17:40
camille...artimus knows ALL about my psychiatric problems....and he still loves me....and me too! yay
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"Unfortunately you cant wipe them out of existence... merely hide the drivel they have to spew"- Kris Ritter
If the lord was handing out bacterial infections for sinning, you'd be at the free clinic all the time. just when I manage to convince myself I'm a superior being, I walk into a door |
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rinaz bijoux
is your friend!
Join date: 8 Oct 2004
Posts: 1,238
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11-12-2004 17:49
I can count at least FIVE couples off the top of my head who have met on SL and are now in a RL relationship. I agree with you, Nolan. Extending that to any Multi User whatever (MUD, MUSH, MUCK, MMO* etc.) I lose count of the number of couples (myself included) who have met in that medium, extending back at least fourteen years and still going strong. The vast majority of those were not looking for a relationship, but simply formed natural strong bonds with another player which developed to the next level. This format is a natural social setting for some people, more so than clubs or gatherings of friends. To consider it 'wrong' or 'unnatural' is simply an ignorant viewpoint. Some people laugh at the fact that my hubby and I will exchange iChat messages when we're lying in bed with our respective laptops on, but to us it is as natural as a verbal exchange. I trust my fingers to come out with what I mean much more than I trust my tongue Agreed with the statement. For me, just go with an open mind. If it works, wonderful, great! But if it doesnt, then we'd just shake hands and remain friends. But of course, there are always dangers to meeting up people, like camille and nolan mentioned. Have heard of too many stories ... But rule of thumb is to always go in large groups, and always go to places where a lot of people are And congratulations Eddie!!!!!! What a happy occasion!! _____________________
Mi Carissimo Cartcart ... Ti penso sempre . Ti amo tanto tanto tanto So blessed are we to have each other  |
