The Skull Beneath the Skin

Okay, all you Halloweeners, I think this could be a suitable topic. I'm thinking real here but it prolly has SL implications.

What are your wishes for the disposal of your Real corpse when you head off for that Secondlife we hope exists on the "other side"? Will you have a religious funeral or a secular one? Will there be music or singing? Food or drinking?

For my part, I want no wake, no viewing, an immediate cremation, a scattering of my ashes on the beach at the bottom of my land. No headstone, the very briefest of obituaries and no public mourning. I want no ceremonies and none of that awful modern remembrance gathering where they kinda "roast" you. I want the simplest of prayers, the playing of "Fantasia on a Theme by Thomas Tallis" by Vaughan Williams as a request on a radio programme, and my property, money and art willed to my friend who has stood by my side for these years of growing up and entering adulthood.

The rest is silence.

But how about you?

What happens to my shell once I am done using it is no concern of mine. My family all know (and it is in my will) that they are to harvest what can be used and anything that can not be sold or donated is to be burned for not one dime more than the crematorium charges the county for taking care of indigents. Other than wanting to be as little burden as possible, I really do not care what happens to the body. Why should I? It is not like it will affect me.

Whatever it might be, I want the cheap option.

Yep, I'm kinda like that.

If it was a choice between some long drawn out horrible thing, and something that would be quick and just freaking awesome, I'd probably get out my nitroused kawasaki one last time. Some grand canyon tourists would prolly end up with the vacation video of a lifetime.

Whatever the living need to do to amuse themselves after, well, go for it.

I agree it doesn't matter to the deceased what method of disposal is used, although one must bear in mind some religions' restrictions on cremation. Certainly it is pointless not to permit any viable organ transplantation. But the funeral itself is for the living. It is a chance to say goodbye, but much more importantly it is the last thing we can do for the person who has died, and psychologically that is important. So yes, choose the music you love, but remember that you will not be hearing it; your spouse, your children and your friends will.

My plans are for a simple service in the Methodist Chapel where we worship, a coffin made of something that will rot easily, and then burial in a specially designated woodland, where a tree will be planted on top and a semi-permanent marker placed. This satisfies me in a number of ways, as cremation has always seemed to me a waste of finite resources. I'd rather see that energy being used to heat the living than cook the dead. Also, cemetaries and graveyards are a dreadful waste of land; how much better is a wood that will provide a home for wildlife, somewhere my children can go if they want to and later timber for building.

As a keen gardener the 'composting' element appeals a lot!

Oh yes, and Spirit in the Sky played loudly, and I have made everyone promise to sing along!

Cremation with a scattering in the California Redwood Forest.

People can party or mourn all they want. I prefer they party. Though i am not one to talk because i cannot go to funerals without erupting in uncontrollable laughter. It is very awkward and embarrassing.

I just hope they find me before I make this room smell too bad. (>_<

If some idiot uses my funeral as an excuse to proselytize the mourners I WILL come back and haunt his inconsiderate ass.

For my part I want whatever is easiest for the next of kin, but I think I would want to leave a little DNA in case some day we can all be codified into the big virtual hereafter. So no cremation for me. I am in the process of providing for that financially.

As for music, I wouldn't subject those I had left behind to my eclectic esoteric tastes, but it would be nice to say goodbye to them from the other side by way of song. The Tallis Fantasia is probably my favorite piece of music ever, but is too long for a funeral (as Jig acknowledges in her post). I would have to think long and hard to come up with an appropriate tune however.



.

Right there. Take anything you can use, and grind the rest up for dogfood for all I care.Whatever is done, don't throw away a pile of money on it.
Ideally would be a demise that was in a manner that left no remains to worry about.

If I ever happen to die, then the C4 I have packed around my chocolate stashes will explode. And since I am sitting on a large natural gas deposit, it should take out most of the eastern seaboard of what ever country I am in at the time.

Then I'll come back and just build my place again.

i already told my family what to do..The short simple version..
go over to the wood pile..get a bunch of wood..make a big stack by my creek where my land starts..then set me on top .light it and have a party..the next day or when the hangovers are gone just fire up the bull dozer and push them into the creek..

It's simple and traditional and some funeral home is not getting paid to do what we can do..
All my family wants to be spread on our land..my father wants to be scattered on all four corners of his land and my sister wants to be spread in her orchard..

Leaving that to the family. Funerals are for the ones left behind.

Knowing my family, they will probably respect my life also after my death, and let useful parts be harvested, then go with a secular ceremony and just put me wherever suits them best.

I'm on the donor register, so if there are any recyclable parts they can be taken - after that it doesn't matter. Whatever meets the wishes of the family left behind.

/me goes off on a tangent imagining heaven being like SL...

Funeral/memorial? Well, I won't be here to see it, so my peeps can do whatever they want.

As for the body? Cremate it, it's more sanitary and less expensive.

I used to live in a town where there was a cemetery on an island in a lagoon, and people would fish in the lagoon. I know, scientifically there is nothing wrong with that, but it would kind of gross me out to eat fish out of there. The runoff... yuck.

And I'm just not gonna say anything about Koko "sitting on a large natural gas deposit", that would be naughty.

I'll have any viable organs donated or have my body donated to my alma mater if it's in an acceptable condition to do so but usually it's an either or situation with the exception of your corneas. It's an incredible gift as a student to know that someone has donated their bodies in order to further your education. It might also be fun to have it plastinated http://www.bodymobil.de/en/body_donation/the_body_donation.html

As for the after party? I want lots and lots of crying. Then a big party.

Darn.. I left behind such a natural straight line even... ;P

You are young. If your friend and the rest of society have done right by you, you may well acquire many more partners, children, and extended family than you now have.

But, only if you stop wasting so much time with SL. I am a strong believer that anyone in their 20s or so should pack up their SL toys and concentrate on their lives "in Real". (God knows, I've badgered Claire enough about it, so now it's your turn.)

You really DO have a lot going for you, Jig. If you really are young, my unasked-for advice is, go find more real people who see that.

And NOW, the rest is silence.

Given my dislike of slow, soft music, I think I'd like Rob Zombie played at any memorial that the living prefers to have for me. And if my relatives get it in their head to play Amazing Grace on a banjo at my funeral, I will come back and set fire to the banjo.

Hmm... cremation sounds good to me, after anything that can be used to save others is taken. Beyond that, just as long as the music isn't that daft stuff they play at funerals, then I don't care.

If law allowed, I'd just say, pour Saki on my body, build a bonfire and toss it on. Ashes aren't even important to me.

I just want it to be non-religious. I like to think I'd get a good send-off though.

ok, either I'm a total perv, or that sounded.. umm.. it came out.. umm..


Naw it's just me I guess

This sort of advice is nonsense and insulting because of it's gross level of presumption. You have no idea about the real lives of people in SL and how much time they are or are not spending "In Real" and whether that time spent "In Real" is any productive time in the first place at all compared to their SL time.

Just because someone is in SL does not mean they are "not concentrating" on their real lives. People go to movies or watch massive movies and t.v. at home, or bury themselves in books or any number of time consuming things. Try reading "Bowling Alone".

Pretty arrogant opinion you have of what people in their 20's or so should do with their second and first lives.

Life is not always a zero sum game and just because you are in SL does not mean you are not doing anything productive in RL.

Excellent points. Which I shall answer as honestly - for sl - as I can. That is because the Forums is as close to reality as we can get without giving each other our phone numbers.

Truth is, like many young people here (I hope) I am inundated with my career. I love it! I seriously do because it is so fulfilling in a creative sense and in a monetary way. My days are filled. SL was only a suggestion by someone in real who saidhalf-jokingly "get a life". It became one more attention-seeker in my calendar.
I am by my nature (and after bitter experience) reclusive. I rarely attend parties unless I am assured I am allowed to enjoy myself in that anonymous way that is so much a part of the true recluse's desire. I am rarely at my residences - my summer home is my true heart's shelter. I love life. But sometimes at night I do - yes, I confess - I do yearn for someone to love. But when it's one am or 3 am and I'm still bopping, well, that's how marriages and hearts get broken where I am coming from.
My sl partner is more a friend. He is Much Older and advises me well. I know I can make him go "tsk tsk".
In real, I have died twice and been resuscitated. Each time for a different reason. I now have a DNR request on my medical record. (Not sure if anyone will follow it - I am known for my "drama" I was barely 21 my first time. I already had a will made up then. Seven or eight years on, I almost died again and come back. Only a year later, I feel very mortal. Its just good sense to plan ahead.
My time in sl is often on forums and often when I am travelling - hotel rooms are lonely places even for people as gregarious as me. (And I AM gregarious - I just like my down-time to be intensely private for weeks or monhs at a time)
Thanks for you GOOD advice. You make me pause for my thoughts.

I fully agree also. I rarely watch TV - who is "House"???? And I am proud to say I have NEVER seen an episode of teh Simpsons or Family SomethingorOther.
You may not believe this, but I think sl is very "intellectual" and a complete reversal of my world in which am totally in charge and have to dominate in so many decisions. Here I can defer to my partner and here I can also be spoken to wih complete honesty. None of you would speak to me as you do in forums like you do if you knew me. It's great fun. But I work SO hard. And I love it! Yesterday I was up at four, drove and flew, worked, flew and drove and am back. I finally got to bed at 2.am - my day had been 21 and a half hours long. Barely time for sl.

I would be inclined to give the same advice.....however....as Brianna points out....there are many reasons that a person might spend some extra time on SL, that might seem excessive....regardless of age....and they should not all be attributed with a negative tone. The alternatives that someone might choose for their time, could be much more negative.

I would have loved to participate in SL when I was Jig's age. At college, I had the opportunity to hang with friends from LA and NY....that I would not have had in the small town I grew up in, which certainly changed the direction my life went.....add SL to that, and you've got influences from all over the world. IF you pay attention to those influences.

That's where I want to shake you up, Jig. Some of your threads come off rather close-minded and judgmental. Shed that....at a young age....and you've got the whole world in your hands, very early on, and you've got a huge advantage. In a positive way.

You are wrong Jig. What makes you think you are so special that you intimidate people in such a manner. My late step dad is a British Actor, my mom has owned a major club in Los Angeles, i dated a professional football player for 3 years and between them have met lots of people who also consider themselves intimidating just because they have been on t.v. or in a movie or in a recording studio and last I have also worked directly for a 2 star and next a 3 star Admiral.

I have no idea why you think no one would talk to you like they do here. My step dad was friends with the late Princess Diane, and seeing how you are neither Princess Di, or the Queen, or any past world leader or dignitary, i doubt i would have any problem talking to you in RL as i do in here on the forums.

I am rather surprised you would think so highly as to place yourself above approach for regular conversation.

Good point, but in a real sense, I HAVE to be judgmental and I know I am self-invested. It's good policy for "where I am coming from". Later on, I'll be more generous in nature. But my "voice" is me - at least, I still make people laugh at my "chutzpah". If I didnt, I would be very upset. People like a show-off, and people like someone they can live vicariously through. I'm more like that. I make people shake their heads in amazement.

I do "give back" in many ways and support many key women's issues and men's, too. I also love Oxfam shops.