Mixing Real Life with Second Life.

Mine only says about 30 miles away.. where my service provider is located

That is a classical schism, and seems to be a bit of a point of contention even inside the Linden walls. It seems to me that certain Lindens are very hip to the idea of turning SL into an "RL augmentation" with identity-verified avatars keyed to your RL identity; essentially a 3D conference room, and that said Lindens are fairly close to the customer relationship positions. So they sometimes use their position to push their vision of a "morally acceptable, clean, business" grid. Robin Linden in particular seems to be entirely oblivious to why some people would like to fantasize and tell "unrealistic stories", and simply cannot comprehend why somebody would not want her vision of a "perfect world".

The (lack of) speed with which those ideas are implemented, however, suggests that the entire organization is not exactly lining up to fulfill it, and there’s certainly a large part of the residents resisting it, wanting the ability to create, well, a *2nd* life, rather than a representation of their first.

The whole "broadly offensive" issue, the resistance to voice, and the current outcry over the ban of child avatars from the birthday exhibition are examples of people fighting for the option to be something else, or at least something else than what the mainstream would like them to be.

and mine reads: Separate. Don't ask and i don't tell you to go to hell. Fair enough?

As the user decides their limits on what they share, the users will just have to deal with being muted or reported for pushing too hard against those limits

I think that's very fair.

In fact, I admire the people that are clear about it in their profile. It means when chatting they're not gonna be accidentally violated by somebody asking "So which galaxy are you from? The milky way?"

I, too, have had people imply to me that because I won't just yatter on and on about my RL in SL that I am "hiding something" or that something must be wrong with me.

I come to SL to have a bit of an escape from my RL. And that's not because my RL is bad in any way (quite the contrary, in fact). I am here to roleplay being someone else.

I'm not going to denigrate myself to lie to anyone in SL either, sorry. If they feel that I am somehow deficient because I don't want to tell them about my RL I see it as their problem, not mine. Accept me for who you see on your screen, the person that I am in SL, because that's all you are going to know.

If you're here to find a RL date, well, I'm not available, anyway, so don't waste your breath trying to convince me to prove to you that I'm not hiding some deep dark RL secret.

(Sorry - this attitude ticks me right off)

Mine isn't even in the same country as me

Hey I know how this conversation would have gone in 2005

(Real Life interested Guy): Hey .. do you mind if I ask you where you are from?

(Original Poster the SL is SL type): Sorry I'd prefer not to say.

(Real Life interested Guy): Cool. See ya around. (then he goes to ask someone else)


Kind of sad to see how the idea of people not wanting SL to be more intrusive than say .. an internet forum .. are faced with more challenges to this preference as SL grows.

It's the internet as a whole affected like that.

I got asked why I didn't have my yahoo profile filled out fully

I got asked the same questions on forums and chat rooms.

Yeah its the Myspace thought process thing.

I wonder how the typical clueless citizen on the net rationalizes the obvious connection between an increase in identity theft and the increase of people sharing personal RL details.

But SL isn't an internet forum. It's widely accepted that an internet forum isn't the sort of place to ask personal questions. Yet a "So where ya from?" in a nightclub may be totally acceptable. and there's many clubs in SL. Not that I'd ever go to one!

SL seems to exist in some weird twilight zone somewhere between nightclub and internet forum. A place where intimacy and anonymity often collide.

That's part of it's charm.

That's the spirit!

I don't think it's rude to ask someone where they are in RL but it certainly is rude not to drop it if they say "Planet Earth".

I agree. For all we know the person asking could be a Cylon. Ugh!

So just how big is your rack, Brenda?.

I think its really boring to NOT talk about RL somewhat in SL. I don't role play in SL, so connecting to someone, somewhat in RL is what its about for me.
I don't enjoy inane chit chat----
Is someone does not feel the same, I just move right on...

Yeah, mine is only 18 inches long. But still has a nice collection of spices on it.

you must sneeze a lot.

we have a mysterious name for such a place -

Its called a Chat Room.

--------------------

The fact that rude intrusiveness is on the rise isn't a cause for celebration.

Anyone who doesn't want a level anonymity for their own online friendships doesn't have to accept it. They can move on, talk to someone else.

And no .. SL shouldn't be any more intrusive on a personal level than these forums. It didn't used to be. So it does not have to be.

RUN, don't walk, away from pushy people. That should be rule #2 of the Internet.

Nobody is trying to become intimate with us or befriend us on the forums. So nobody cares who anybody is. A discussion on a forum is totally different than a conversation in-world.

"Intrusiveness" can come in the form of people wanting to befriend us while still wanting to hold onto their anonymity. SL's IM mode doesn't help this at all. We can't just avoid people like we can in RL. So SL itself encourages this form of intrusiveness.

But I think we're both being a little hyperbolic in that very few people push for info on where we live in the first line of conversation and very few people will push for a friendship whilst still trying to hold onto their anonymity.

So ultimately - blah...

I have 30 people on my yahoo messenger contact list currently, it used to be up to 40 or so.

It too allows for the friendships here with intimacy as does IRC

If anyone pushes for more physical world information, punt after a warning

SL is an IRC chat room with graphics and a sandbox tool kit

I find it acceptable to give a state or country, possibly what part of the state or country.

If we've talked several times, I'll give an area (quite a big area).

Specifics come after I've known someone quite some time.

Specific Specifics are a case-by-case basis.

Lol speak for yourself

*waits for answer*

For me it depends entirely who I'm talking to. I'll happily tell anyone the city I live in, and chat in fairly vague terms about RL. With closer friends I share more. One or two know all the sordid little details. Well, most of them anyway. But with complete strangers I don't share much. I have to get to know people well before I share the rest.