Love you all!! *HUGS*
|
|
Cristiano Midnight
Evil Snapshot Baron
Join date: 17 May 2003
Posts: 8,616
|
12-22-2004 11:05
From: Devlin Gallant Pen, sweetie. If you ever get really frustrated, and need to take it out on someone feel free to verbally abuse me all you want. Just don't leave.  That is a win-win situation. Pendari stays, and you get sexual gratification. Life is nice that way. 
_____________________
Cristiano ANOmations - huge selection of high quality, low priced animations all $100L or less. ~SLUniverse.com~ SL's oldest and largest community site, featuring Snapzilla image sharing, forums, and much more. 
|
|
Trinity Serpentine
Schwan's Avitar Reject
Join date: 1 Oct 2003
Posts: 2,972
|
12-22-2004 11:07
From: Cristiano Midnight You are so competitive Nah, I just want to be like you when I grow up. Cris, you're my hero. 
_____________________
From: someone Yeah, the toaster has great speakers, but all I want is fucking toast. - The Filthy Critic reviewing Aeon Flux
|
|
Cristiano Midnight
Evil Snapshot Baron
Join date: 17 May 2003
Posts: 8,616
|
12-22-2004 11:09
From: Trinity Serpentine Nah, I just want to be like you when I grow up. Cris, you're my hero. Aww Thank you by the way, for helping Pen as well, from me. You are a great friend to her and she is lucky to have you.
_____________________
Cristiano ANOmations - huge selection of high quality, low priced animations all $100L or less. ~SLUniverse.com~ SL's oldest and largest community site, featuring Snapzilla image sharing, forums, and much more.
|
|
Trinity Serpentine
Schwan's Avitar Reject
Join date: 1 Oct 2003
Posts: 2,972
|
12-22-2004 11:23
From: Cristiano Midnight Aww Thank you by the way, for helping Pen as well, from me. You are a great friend to her and she is lucky to have you. When you love someone, it's easy.
_____________________
From: someone Yeah, the toaster has great speakers, but all I want is fucking toast. - The Filthy Critic reviewing Aeon Flux
|
|
Juro Kothari
Like a dog on a bone
Join date: 4 Sep 2003
Posts: 4,418
|
12-22-2004 11:25
From: Pendari Lorentz That is bascially what happened last night. I think it is the mixture of RL issues along with some personal SL issues that I am dealing with. Some of which I deal with on a regular basis. I really love this world. I love the people and the friends I have here. I don't really want to leave, but I'm scared I will drift away some day because I don't feel like I can share a personal side of myself. Pen... this time of year has always been a time of exceptional pressure for a lot, if not all, folks. Our RL dealings are very much a part of our SL existance. Sometimes, SL offers a means of getting away and relaxing from our RL's. Other times, I've found, I just need to decompress from both RL and SL, so I don't log on for a day or two. All of the things on 'the other side' of Pen are things that make up the Pen we know and love. Those who truly value you would understand we all have stresses in our RL and that everyone needs an ear to bend from time to time. Pen, you can bend my ear whenever you need. The doctor is in. |
|
Malana Spencer
Registered User
Join date: 18 Sep 2003
Posts: 368
|
aww Pen 12-22-2004 12:25
From: Pendari Lorentz bleh.. You people make it really hard for a person to stay pissed off and sad. I seriously love you all, and your kind words here mean more to me than I can even begin to express in words. Yes. Last night I was fully ready to leave SL forever. Normally when I leave a game, I don't say anything at all. I just disapear, usually not to be heard from again. I guess a part of me posted something because that part of me was not ready to let go no matter how sad and upset I was. I feel horrible that I said anything though. It is unfair to make anyone worry about me. And basically I was scared to come back and say that I am re-considering leaving. I don't want to be a "cry wolf" person. I'm not a "cry wolf" person. I just know that I'm shaking as I write this. There is a side of me that so few know. I'm terribly afraid to show that side of me because I am supposed to be the one that people turn to when they are upset. I love to help people. I love to be there for people. And I absolutly believe I would scare off a lot of people if they ever saw my emotional and/or angry side. I'm Pen. I'm the happy go lucky one. And I want people to believe that about me. At the same time, I guess I let things well up inside me. And I just explode finally. That is bascially what happened last night. I think it is the mixture of RL issues along with some personal SL issues that I am dealing with. Some of which I deal with on a regular basis. I really love this world. I love the people and the friends I have here. I don't really want to leave, but I'm scared I will drift away some day because I don't feel like I can share a personal side of myself. I can't keep stuff in and explode finally over and over again. It is not healthy. If I ever do leave for real, I will probably do so quietly. Please kick me if I ever say I'm leaving outloud again. I am going to try and hold my chin up after this. I am really embarrased though. At this point I don't even know what else to say other than Thank you again everyone for your support. You all mean so much to me and I am sorry I made you worry. Pen- I very much can relate to what you have said about being the person that people turn to & being afraid to show your other side (the explosion thing too). I have spent alot of my rl (& part of my SL) being this way. I don't think less of my friends who come to me & talk to me about what's on their mind good or bad. In fact I think more of them, beause it means they care & trust me enough to know that they CAN do this. So why would they (your friends) think of you as less of a person if you did the same? Not to sound cliche BUT "That's what friends are for" You do NOT have to live up to anyone else's expectations (I highly doubt anyone would think lesser of you because you got upset at times or opened up a bit about what's bothering you) The Fact of the matter is Pendari, whoever you are IS good enough. If you're friends are truelly your friends (& I believe many of them are) then they will accept ALL your sides & love you more for sharing the gift that is YOU. *hugs u tight* Glad to hear you are staying. |
|
Carolyn Fallingbridge
Auntie
Join date: 31 Dec 2003
Posts: 120
|
12-22-2004 13:24
I totally thought I was gonna burst into tears in the middle of work when I read Pen was leaving. I'm *so* glad she's not. Even though I don't hardly know here (we've spoken like twice), I know she's one of the biggest and most positive influences in all of SL. And Pen, if you ever want to come and talk to somebody about the stuff that's driving you crazy, you hardly know me, and we don't hang out with the same people, so I'd be happy to listen to you talk about things, and can keep it to myself. --Carolyn (Pendari's Auntie)
_____________________
Don't worry... I'm not *your* Auntie, if you don't want me to be. 
|
|
Rose Karuna
Lizard Doctor
Join date: 5 Jun 2004
Posts: 3,772
|
12-22-2004 13:54
From: Carolyn Fallingbridge I totally thought I was gonna burst into tears in the middle of work when I read Pen was leaving. I'm *so* glad she's not. Even though I don't hardly know here (we've spoken like twice), I know she's one of the biggest and most positive influences in all of SL. And Pen, if you ever want to come and talk to somebody about the stuff that's driving you crazy, you hardly know me, and we don't hang out with the same people, so I'd be happy to listen to you talk about things, and can keep it to myself. --Carolyn (Pendari's Auntie) Pen - What Carolyn said applies for me as well. Also - I'm embarking on a mission to visit all of the parks in Second Life. The nice thing about doing this is that you get to see a lot of cool stuff and put the other aspects of SL on hold for a bit. Want to come with me? Rose
_____________________
I Do Whatever My Rice Krispies Tell Me To
|
|
Pendari Lorentz
Senior Member
Join date: 5 Sep 2003
Posts: 4,372
|
12-22-2004 14:18
Papi, I love you too! Great ideas Lisse, thank you! I will be sure to put those ideas on places to visit. Devlin, the offer to abuse you is very sweet. I will be sure to keep you in mind!  Juro, yes. This is a *really* rough time of year for me RL. Even though I love the holiday beyond belief, much of the stuff that has happened around this time brings back some pretty depressing memories. And of course anything family related I think about extra during this time, so a lot of depressing stuff just seems to overwhelm me. Malana, you are right. And I should know that what you say is true. I resolve to really work on not keeping things bottled up. Granted I don't get upset often, but when I do it is usually about something I feel is worthy of getting upset over. I have to trust that I'm not just a psycho (please no comments from the peanut gallery on that remark  ) Carolyn, you make a wonderful aunt. I love that about you. Thank you! *hugs* and Rose.. After this week, I would love to join you on some of your visits to parks. I miss exploring like I used to, and parks were always a very peaceful thing I loved to find in SL. So thank you for the offer! Again thank you everyone. I am starting to feel much better and you all are just amazing to me. I can't thank you enough or tell you how honored I am to have such great friends. I'm still pretty embarrased, but I'll get over that soon I hope. *HUGS*
_____________________
*hugs everyone*
|
|
Roberta Dalek
Probably trouble
Join date: 21 Oct 2004
Posts: 1,174
|
12-22-2004 14:47
*gives Pen a massive hug*
|
|
Pendari Lorentz
Senior Member
Join date: 5 Sep 2003
Posts: 4,372
|
12-22-2004 21:19
aww.. *hugs* Roberta .. I cannot begin to explain how wonderful you all are
_____________________
*hugs everyone*
|
|
Essence Lumin
.
Join date: 24 Oct 2003
Posts: 806
|
12-22-2004 21:50
Just think, even though you were maybe leaving and posted about it, not one negative comment out of six pages of posts. I don't think I've seen that before.
Best wishes Pendari!
|
|
Essence Lumin
.
Join date: 24 Oct 2003
Posts: 806
|
12-22-2004 21:53
As with everyone who has posted here I wish you the best Pendari.
|
|
Oz Spade
ReadsNoPostLongerThanHand
Join date: 23 Sep 2003
Posts: 2,708
|
12-23-2004 06:21
I apologize for my lateness on this thread, but yeah. Pen you can't leave, we have a deal damnit! I'm always around in some form either on yahoo or in world, if you ever want to just stream at someone I've been told I'm a good listener.
_____________________
"Don't anticipate outcome," the man said. "Await the unfolding of events. Remain in the moment." - Konrad
|