Love you all!! *HUGS*

Pen,
Please let us know what has precipitated this action. You have been a wonderful friend and if you truly are leaving, I will be very sad. You are one of the people that makes SL a worthwhile place for me. If it is something LL has done, tier all the way back..I will always have a home for you. If it is something some fucktard did, give me a name.

PLEASE DON'T LEAVE.

Love,
Schwanson

Agreed with all of the above! If you are just going away for the holidays **huge hugs back**. However, if this was a "Goodbye I'm leaving SL for good" think again, we will send the SL mob after ya to drag ya back kicking and screaming.

Huggerz,
MJ

She is off to patrol other forums... see her new outfit? (thanks Kimmera!)

Nobody seems to know where you are going Pen, but I have always loved to read your forum posts and I hope you are happy (wherever you're going??). Happy Holidays! Don't leave SL!!

Geeze Pen, this is just a holiday thing --- I hope. Still going to see ya on the RL tour, right?.......RIGHT?!!

What's going on...at least tell us.

I am not sure if she is going to post in this thread or not - but the speculations about it only being a holiday thing are off base, she is leaving SL. Thank you for your posts supporting her - she needs them right now. I hope they convince her to stay.

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo Pen, don't leave us

I think she went to the MALL for some last minute gifts.
omg we may never see her again!



fen-

bleh.. You people make it really hard for a person to stay pissed off and sad.

I seriously love you all, and your kind words here mean more to me than I can even begin to express in words.

Yes. Last night I was fully ready to leave SL forever. Normally when I leave a game, I don't say anything at all. I just disapear, usually not to be heard from again. I guess a part of me posted something because that part of me was not ready to let go no matter how sad and upset I was.

I feel horrible that I said anything though. It is unfair to make anyone worry about me. And basically I was scared to come back and say that I am re-considering leaving. I don't want to be a "cry wolf" person. I'm not a "cry wolf" person. I just know that I'm shaking as I write this.

There is a side of me that so few know. I'm terribly afraid to show that side of me because I am supposed to be the one that people turn to when they are upset. I love to help people. I love to be there for people. And I absolutly believe I would scare off a lot of people if they ever saw my emotional and/or angry side. I'm Pen. I'm the happy go lucky one. And I want people to believe that about me. At the same time, I guess I let things well up inside me. And I just explode finally.

That is bascially what happened last night. I think it is the mixture of RL issues along with some personal SL issues that I am dealing with. Some of which I deal with on a regular basis. I really love this world. I love the people and the friends I have here. I don't really want to leave, but I'm scared I will drift away some day because I don't feel like I can share a personal side of myself. I can't keep stuff in and explode finally over and over again. It is not healthy. If I ever do leave for real, I will probably do so quietly. Please kick me if I ever say I'm leaving outloud again.

I am going to try and hold my chin up after this. I am really embarrased though. At this point I don't even know what else to say other than Thank you again everyone for your support. You all mean so much to me and I am sorry I made you worry.

I've only met you a few times in world Pendari but I think you're nice and I'm glad you're staying.


... You're staying right?

Pen,

*hugs*

ya know we wuvs u

YAY! Hang in there Pen !!!! HUGS

Pendari,

I can't tell you how relieved and delighted I am that you are thinking again. I felt really upset that you had apparently decided to leave sl, and I am so happy that you are reconsidering.

However, I am very sorry that you seem to be struggling with issues inworld. You are clearly loved by many people. None of us is perfect, and I certainly don't expect perfection, or perfect behaviour, from people I care for.

If you want to talk, please IM me inworld.

Don't feel ashamed about your decisions; no one who knows you will accuse you of crying wolf - they will be just so happy that you're not leaving, and that will override everything else.

I don't know what this is about, but most things can be sorted out without recourse to drastic measures. I hope that is the case here, and that you can get back to enjoying second life.

Take care, Pen,

Selador

Pen, GLAD YOU ARE STAYING!!! . If I can help just let me know. I just don't want to lose a good friend...

Think about it, ok?

*(edited to reflect pens reply which I didn't get to read in my posting panic.)

pendari,

i'm reading this late so i only had a short panic before seeing your reply. you can vent to me anytime free of charge. it's not easy being an openly available sounding board for people. you do have to let the steam off occassionally without having to worry about being judged for it. i'll keep my little green mouth shut tight and not think any the worse of you for saying it.

question now is what do i think of you to begin with ha ha ha but you know you're wonderful.

Huggggs Pendari,

When things look to be at their worst, is when it's inevitable that they will get better

You are loved by many, and I personally have had the pleasure to talk to you on a few occasions in SL. You truly are a special person to have so many people be touched by your kindness and caring personality both in world and in the forums (how many people can claim that?). If you would ever like to talk feel free to send a buzz my way and we can listen to some 80's tunes and trade hugs (no one makes 7'4" look as HOT as you!).

Sincerely,

~Jay

PHEW!!!!! We love you Pen, and if you ever need a shoulder or an ear to vent into I'm sure there are many of us (myself included) who'd be more than happy to provide it

Maybe we should make a "Pen's smile enforcers" group. If anyone tries to mess with her smile, we can be there with swift retribution. Also a Pen signal, kinda like a Bat signal. I am sure hundreds would show up

Stick in there Pen!

Thank fecking gawd. SL without Pendari would be like diet caffeine free soda. It just doesn't work.

It'd be like non-alcoholic beer.

It'd be like a hershey's kiss without the chocolate.

PLEASE STAY! *big hugz*

-Flip

Hey Pen...

Its very understandable that you felt this way.

May I suggest traveling.. inworld to new places you have not yet seen, new people who you have not yet met...

Have you been to the winter festival?

I know my suggestion wont fix your problems, but its a nice way of getting out from underneath them for a bit.

fen-

Pen....I just want to say I love you no matter how you are,,,angry, sad, happy, hopeful, discouraged, yummy(whoops, lol). Be who you are and never worry about having to be someone you are not. There is no reason to think there is this "role" of the happy, helpful person you might have to play. I guess what I am saying is that stuffing emotions is not good and all of us who love you will encourage you to just be you and love you!!
Sending warm hugs, and one itty bitty butt pinch(Ok, I am such a bad girl,,lol, even being marrried to my darling Aynen)
nemi...

I'm so glad you can stay Pen. You're one of the real people here. So many I see are I dunno, too plastic.

Pen, you've been an inspiration, not just to me, but to a lot of people. We all owe you so much. As has been said, if you need to vent... just call.

Believe me, true friends will accept you just the way you are.

You have to let the steam vent or the resulting explosion would be far worse than letting off a little steam here and there.

Think of the consequences. You may tick off some people here and there by letting off some steam, but if you keep it all in and let it explode, then all the people here that love you and appreciate your help will not have you around. What is worse?

Glad to know you are sticking around. I know you are very precious to many.

- T -

YAY! *does a happy dance, grabs Pen by the hand and twirls her around*

You owe me a date on Thursday night, woman!! Love you!

Thank the gods! Damn girl, you had me worried! If you ever need anything hun, anything at all, please, please let me know. A shoulder to lean on, ear to talk into, pervert to..umm..well..go sightseeing with. Please let me know hun. I'm such a hermit that I don't get out to see my friends often, but I sure consider you one, and would do anything for you darlin! You're wonderful, and never let anyone tell you otherwise!