Hippos

LOL Maerl.

And just what is the word for "Hippopotamus" in the language of hippos?

Seems a rather egregious omission...

=SV

GOOD QUESTION SINCLAIR.....and here is your answer:

GRouummmpphhhuullmmpprrrttuuunnmmppphhhiiimp......of course......being human...most of you wont get the translation.......the nearest i can translate for the human ear is........Bob.....

im thinking of buying my own HIPPO..........hmmmm i wonder.................How to Look After Your Hippopotamus
As we live in a rather small house we have no hippopotami but the following has been compiled after extensive (more than ten minutes) research.

Choosing your hippo
Choose a happy hippo but avoid lively hippos at all costs. If possible check that the mother is healthy and alert. Your ideal baby hippo should be smaller than its mother and should be moist skinned. Hippos exude a pink goo to keep their skins from drying out when they leave the water so look for a good gooey baby.
Baby hippos are fed by their mothers until they are about eight months old but they stay close to mum until they are several years old. So by picking a baby hippo two or three years old you can avoid an awkward argument with 1500kg (3000lbs) of irate mother.

Hippo Belongings
Hippos are not big on belonging having no pockets to carry things in but the following may help you.

His litter tray:Hippos can rarely be convinced to use a litter tray and finding one large enough can be a problem; this coupled with the male hippos tendency to mark its territory by flicking its dung around with its tail, means it is best to try and persuade your hippo to leave the house when it needs to.
A Hippo Flap:A hippo flap is a little like a cat flap and serves the same purpose. It is however a lot bigger.
A Collar:There really doesn't seem much point in putting a collar on your new hippo. If it wanders off it is sure to spotted it pretty quickly. A hippo in the High Street is highly unlikely to get run over. Don't bother to try to take your pet hippo for walks. Hippos can rarely be trained to the lead and fetching sticks is right out.
A Hippo Guard for the Car: This serves the same purpose as a dog guard and is really essential when driving with your hippo. A full grown hippopotamus climbing over the back seat of your car can be very distracting.
A Bathing Pool: Hippos spend up to 18 hours of every day in the water so they need a pool. They won't share a bath and the average garden fish pond is too small. A large African river is preferred if it can be made available.

Food
Hippos eat grass. They like to eat in the evening and an adult only eats 40kg (80lbs) of grass a day. Get a BIG lawn.

Grooming
Fur: Hippos need little grooming as they have very little fur (none). Also consider, do you really want to groom hippo nose and ear hair? A tick bird could prove helpful here.

Teeth: A male hippos teeth can grow up to 50cm (that's over 18 in) long. If you insist on cleaning his teeth use a brush with a very long handle!

Sick Hippos
There are very few home remedies for hippos available in our local pet shop (well none actually) so take your sick hippo to a vet. Find a surgery with a BIG waiting room.

Should he/she have a family?
No No No No No, are you mad? You want more than one of these things breaking down your doors and swallowing your goldfish?

Remember: A hippo is for life, not just for Christmas !!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Dude. Wow.

I need some coffee.

Wow it's been a while.

Yes it has been, you almost dropped the Hippo ball.

ON a serious note..........

By the Skin of Their Teeth: Will Hippos Survive Ivory Demand?
The ban on the export of elephant ivory in the late 1980's was beneficial for elephants. However, it moved the pressure onto another animal-the hippopotamus. Hippo teeth, which are ivory, have the advantage of not yellowing as much with age, being softer and easier to carve, and they can reach average lengths of 24 inches. Only approximately 157,000 hippos exist in the wild, which is only about a third or less of the number of elephants. The elephants have protection, but how about the hippos?

Former vice-president of the World Wildlife Federation, Henri Nsanjama, said in the 1990's that the dwindling number of hippos due to poaching for ivory was "...a minor problem now" (Swift, 1997). However, he followed this with the warning that "...if we don't act, it could become a huge problem."Swift, 1997). In the late 1980's, just before the ivory ban was enacted, 5,640 pounds of hippo teeth were exported from Africa. In 1991, that number expanded to 30,100 pounds. This number has held fairly steady ever since. But how many hippos are actually being killed specifically for their ivory is questionable.

Conducting a search on the Internet for hippo ivory, you are likely to find a variety of items for sale. Tusks for sale from Boone Trading Company can be used for "...carving, scrimshaw, and knife handles". Of course, they preface their sales items with a pitch about how dangerous hippos are, and note that they are killed in "government culling operations". According to them, the hippos have not died for their ivory, but the skin and teeth are made use of once the animals have already been killed.

The Asian Art Mall (asianartmall.com) declares that hippo ivory is taken from captive animals at zoos worldwide. The hippos do not have to die, since the tusks are trimmed from 1-2 times per year. The ivory is then sold for artists to use, and the zoo profits. This sounds like a good exchange! However, they also claim there are thousands of hippos in zoos around the world. How true is that? The most recent report from ISIS (www.isis.org) indicates less than five-hundred. And I have yet to hear from even one zoo official that this ivory exchange does take place.

The laws regarding import and export of hippo ivory differ from one country to another. For example, there are hippo ivory items available in Hong Kong, but they can't be exported to all countries (ThinkQuest,1999). A man was caught smuggling five tons of hippo teeth by the Uganda Wildlife Authority (Allafrica.com, 2001). The concern was not the teeth, but that he hadn't declared them. According to the IUCN, the population of hippos is declining in Uganda, and this decline will probably continue since enforcement of existing laws to protect the hippos is lacking. The IUCN website provides a complete listing of which populations of hippos in Africa are vulnerable.

The last assessment of the hippos' conservation status was done in 1996. Hippopotamus amphibius, the common hippo, was listed as being the least at risk. Hippopotamus amphibius tschadensis, a race found in west Africa, is listed as vulnerable.

Of the sites I've mentioned above, each lists a different source for their hippo ivory: leftovers from culling operations, which we know do occur, or trimmings from zoo hippos. The other possibility is, of course, that the animals are intentionally killed for the use of their teeth, as well as other parts.

Hip hip hip hip
Look at that hippo go
Hip hip hip hippo
Wallowing to and fro

Look closely in the water for the hippo
His eyes, ears and nostrils are all that show
Basking on a sandbar all the day
Wading in the water is where he'll stay

He goes to land for food at night
Eats water plants and grass to his delight
Never wanders far from the swimming hole
Nowhere else that he needs to go

Hip hip hip hip
Look at that hippo go
Hip hip hip hippo
Wallowing to and fro

He has a barrel-shaped body
Weighing three to five tons
Short pillar legs
He gallops when he runs
His mouth is enormous
With a bulging thick lip
Large flat head, raised eyes
And nostrils that slit
His teeth keep growing
Cuz' they wear down when he eats
Armed with large canine tusks
That reach two to five feet

When its time for breeding
The hippo shows his teeth
Yawning is his challenge stance
He fights to defeat
Once the mating season is over
The true leaders emerge
For in the hippo world
The female rules the herd

Hip hip hip hip
Look at that hippo go
Hip hip hip hippo
Wallowing to and fro

Their babies are born together
All females join as one
They become instant baby sitters
Tending to all of the young
A hippo is able to walk run and swim
Within five months of birth
He rides his mother's back
He's rambunctious and alert
Mommy is quite strict
Expecting him to behave
There are certain things
That he must know to live the hippo way
Boys and girls are separated
In the games their parents teach
Boys learn to fight
While girls play hide and seek

Hip hip hip hip
Look at that hippo go
Hip hip hip hippo
Wallowing to and fro

I want a hippopotamus for Christmas
Only a hippopotamus will do
I don't want a doll, no dinkey tinker toys
I want a hippopotamus to play with and enjoy


I want a hippopotamus for Christmas
I don't think Santa Claus will mind, do you?
He won't have to use a dirty chimney flue
Just bring him through the front door
That's the easy thing to do


I can see me now on Christmas morning
Creeping down the stairs
Oh what joy, what surprise
When I open up my eyes
To see a hippo hero standing there


I want a hippopotamus for Christmas
Only a hippopotamus will do
No crocodiles, no rhinosaurus
I only likes hippopotamuses
And hippopotamuses like me, too


Mom says a hippo would eat me up, but then
Teacher says a hippo is a vegetarian
There's lots of room for him in our two-car garage
I'd feed him there and wash him there and give him his massage.

YAY TANLINDRA!!!


KEEP EM COMMING!!

errrrr sorry Talindra....hehehe <dont ya hate it when people misssssspell your name>

did you know HIPPO spelled backwards is OPPIH...?

<i know i know..im really reaching now> <sigh>

And, if you mix it all up, it spells, "Hi, Pop!"

Maybe Hippos are a giant father's day gift...

THIS HORSE WALKS INTO A BAR....AND THE BARTENDER SAYS.....oppppppsie...wrong thread.....well anyways here is

The Hippo "Top Ten" List
Top Ten Reasons Hippos are Cool

No. 10: No protruding appendages such as those you find on, say, an elephant.
No. 9: Low center of gravity makes them remarkably stable.
No. 8: Come on, admit it: it's fun to say the word "hippopotamus" out loud.
No. 7: Easy to draw (especially from the rear).
No. 6: Streamlined shape makes them extremely aerodynamic.
No. 5: Undeniable proof that big, fat, smelly creatures can be cute and loveable, too.<hehehe you know who you are >.
No. 4: Make very efficient--and environmentally friendly--garbage disposals.
No. 3: Not offended by "fat" jokes.
No. 2: Unlike certain small feline pets I could mention, they're not finicky eaters.
No. 1: After a long, hard day at the office, there's nothing like having your faithful hippo meet you at the front door--wagging his tail furiously, grunting joyfully, and leaping into your arms--to make everything right with the world.


......everyone should hug a hippo.............come on lets all go find a hippo and share the love people!!!!!!!!!

...wheres my popsicle?...........

OK i was gonna start this on my last post..but ummm i ran outta room.....lets see what kind of adventures we can find for our hero..........

The Adventures of BOBO


Once there was a young, funloving Hippo named Bobo, he was named after his grandfather, Boborantalupamus, a very famous hippo in his time.One day Bobo and his pal derkwin were playing in thier favorite mud hole,when suddenly, out of the forest , ran a large,white.....<lets see what happens next guys!!!!!...post a few sentences >

...female hippo. For Bobo, it was love at first sight! He ran up to her and started to talk, when Derkwin said, "Meet my new girlfriend, Chartruse." Bobo was heartbroken, and knew that Derkwin wasn't going to be faithful to her. So, he knew he had to scheme a plan to break them up. He...

... appropriated government funds and started a secretive cabal of like-minded oversized mammals, who set out to control the world banks through underhanded dealings and drug-controlled lobbyists. A hippo of means and of serious intent, Bobo knew that the world is a sphere of clay waiting to be moulded by those with strength and vision.

After receiving the daily reports and analyzing the situation, Bobo leaned back in his chair and rubbed his chin with his stubby fore-toes. Pushing a button on his intercom, he barked commands at his llama secretary. "Ms. Brevitts... take a memo. I demand that ...

<bump> and now for the DAILY HIPPO Muse





I had a hippopotamus; I kept him in a shed
And fed him upon vitamins and vegetable bread;
I made him my companion on many cheery walks
And had his portrait done by a celebrity in chalks.
His charming eccentricities were known on every side,
The creature's popularity was wonderfully wide;
He frolicked with the Rector in a dozen friendly tussles,
Who could not but remark upon his hippopotamuscles.

If he should be afflicted by depression or the dumps,
By hippopotameasles or the hippopotamumps,
I never knew a particle of peace till it was plain
He was hippopotamasticating properly again.

I had a hippopotamus; I loved him as a friend;
But beautiful relationships are bound to have an end.
Time takes, alas! our joys from us and robs us of our blisses;
My hippopotamus turned out a hippopotamissis.

My housekeeper regarded him with jaundice in her eye;
She did not want a colony of hippopotami;
She borrowed a machine-gun from her soldier-nephew, Percy,
And showed my hippopotamus no hippopotamercy.

My house now lacks the glamour that the charming creature gave,
The garage where I kept him is as silent as the grave;
No longer he displays among the motor-tires and spanners
His hippopotamastery of hippopotamanners.

No longer now he gambols in the orchard in the Spring;
No longer do I lead him through the village on a string;
No longer in the mornings does the neighborhood rejoice
To his hippopotamusically-modulated voice.

I had a hippopotamus; but nothing upon earth
Is constant in its happiness or lasting in its mirth.
No joy that life can give me can be strong enough to smother
My sorrow for that might-have-been-a-hippopotamother.


we now return you to your regularly schedule thread.
SO what happens with Bobo next?????????????????

I'd rather have a hippo in front of me than a frontal hippotomy.

How much fuss could a hippopotamus spawn at us if a hippopotamus could spawn fuss at us?

O hippopotamus amphibius,
For aqua, you're proclivitus.
Your mouth, when open four feet wide
Shows us mangled plants inside.
Be aware, my mammoth friend
I don't enjoy your other end.
So stay! And wallow in your ponds,
Munch on the lowest hanging fronds,
And do not deign to sit on me -
You'd find that there's a hefty fee
To call on a proctologus,
My dearest hippopotamus.

-- Coyote Murphy, channelling Ogden Nash

hippopotamus

H is for the hair you dont have much of

I is for the interesting way you eat

P is for the ......man its way to early to use my brain in this capacity...illl finish this later <yawn>

What happened to BoBo and CHartuse?

I think Chartruse was liquidated :^/

Are Hippos squishy?

I don't think that they would be...