can someone plz help me?

Story goes like this, My friend made a character in TG, She got bored.
So Friend makes a MG character and is now in a huge time relation ship with a 25 year old guy,

I do not want to rat out my friend but i really want her back in TG. What should i do?

Last i checked, 16 year olds going out with 25 year olds irl, Is completely wrong.

You'd be right - why not report either your friend or the guy?

You're not doing either your friend or the 25 year old any good at all by not "ratting them out". It's kind of like not telling someone's parents that their 16 year old daughter is sneaking out the window at midnight to go see some guy in the next town down the road......... Sure it all could be on the up and up............but what if it's not?

Shame on you for not telling the people who really need to know.

*shrugs* My mother was 15 when she married a 24 year old man. Unless you think she's really in danger from him, I'd say let her your friend make her own choices. If being under 18 makes her too immature to make decisions for herself, what gives you the right to make those decisions for her, since you are also under 18?

*shrugs*...........Statistically, your mother was very lucky. Luck is not a reliable indicater of whether or not something is dangerous..........at best, it's a 50-50 shot (key words: "at best). Better to err on the side of caution.

I doubt he knows she`s 16. If so, yuk.

About two weeks ago, I saw news reports about 90% of U.S. teens having had sex before 18 and many of those had partners who were older than 18 (I certainly did). I'd say 50/50 is mistaken and that our culture has a major hypocrisy problem, and I'm curious what "statistics" you're citing when you say "statistically speaking." My mother's experience is the norm even now.....we just don't get married.

Prior to the 20th century, the vast majority of women married before 18 to men older than 18. (Consult any good domestic history.) Only the advent of women in the work force changed that, because early marriage and pregnancy can mess up a career. In non-western cultures, those practices are still the norm. In the US, teen sexuality is the norm...we just don't get married like elsewhere and birth control options let us go to school and work while being sexually active.

In the US, all our entertainment authorizes and glamorizes teen sex (can't think of any TV teen virgins, actually, except in a few sitcoms where a person's virginity is the butt of an ongoing joke), even sex with adults, but we still have to pretend it doesn't happen and that when it does it's always always bad. (Wasn't there some old 80's song that started "She's just 16 years old / Leave her alone, they say....". I think we all are aware of the dangers of genuine pedophilia, but good god we're talking about a 16 year old in an online friendship. I'd had four real-life sexual partners by that age, one who was older than 30. I'm in college right now and it's pretty rare to run into other girls who didn't have experiences similar to mine when they were in high school.

Maybe I'm alone in feeling this way in SL. But that's how I see it: not a lot to get worked up over.

Isn't it against the rules for a 25 year old man to be in the Teen Guild????
Also...As the mom of a 23 year old daughter, if she had been involved with a 25 year old MAN when she was 16, or even 18, I would have done my best to put a stop to it. It dosen't matter if it's just a game, or if it's on the TG...he is too old for her, plain and simple. You know what the right thing is, just do it : )

Let me clarify a little. This 16 year old is on the adult grid because a "friend" of hers got her an account. That is the same as that 16 year old sneaking out the window at midnight.........she's doing it without parental concent. 18 is the magic number in this country........it's wrong and she knows it. Could it be said that she knows enough to take care of herself? I doubt it.........taking care of yourself involves following rules.

The historical facts stated don't neccessarily apply here. Back in the days sited the parents were involved.........not kept in the dark like this situation appears to be. It's not hypocracy.......it's caution and common sense. Now, if the parents are envolved then I might be all wet on this. But my bet is that the parents are clueless.......that makes it potentially very bad.

Wrong is wrong......and ducking the responsibility of righting wrongs when you can is also wrong. Perhaps even more wrong than the orginal. Turning your back on it and shrugging your shoulders perpetuates continued behaviour like this. I don't want teenagers on the adult grid without my knowing that they are teenagers. And I'm sure those teens won't fess up either. So who's watching my back? I'm following the rules. Some are not and what's worse others know it and won't say a word.....won't "rat them out". It would be nice if you could trust..........things like this make it impossible though.

Both should be "ratted out".............for everyone's good. Even mine.

The age of consent in most US states is actually 16 y.o, not 18, and in any case does not cover virtual relationships. Whether or not "wrong is wrong", such is the laws of the country. In Europe it's mostly 16 also. In France it's 15 y.o. and in Canada, as low as 12 y.o in parts of the country.

So TG/MG restriction is a Linden rule rather than a statutory requirement. And the "25 y.o man" on the MG might in any case be a 14 y.o. boy in reality, or a 70 y.o bald fat guy... no one really knows.

-peekay

The TOS clearly states that you must be 18 to be in the MG. End of story.

And that's the main problem

18 years old is the age of consent throughout this country. Yes in some states a 16 year old may marry another who is over the age of 18..........with parental consent. Otherwise is it against the law even in that state. Linden Labs rules concerning teen grid and mature grid are in accordance with rules and laws across the entire United States.........age of consent is 18. If LL did not have such a rule then LL would be irresponsible and wreckless and would deserve to be closed down for such negligence.........in fact,I would be in line demanding it.

Yeah that 25 year old man I might be flirting with in SL very well could be some 12 year old under his bed covers with his laptop..............the very reason I am so cautious with everyone in SL. And no one knows that I'm not some 95 year old 455 pound wrinkled old hag either............you just have to trust me. The rules will be broken (especially when it's so easy to do and get away with it) but that does not, in any way, excuse someone for neglecting to do the right thing and correct the wrong when they become aware of it. We all are at risk (financially, and legally) should one of those 16 year olds get involved with some 25 year old in an inappropriate way (or worse). Every chat, IM, and (probably) transaction between any member of either the teen or the adult community is logged and can be pulled up and provided to a law enforcement agency (with the appropriate legal actions). You (and my) little sexual inuendos or acts with that 25 year old pre adolescent under the covers with his laptop would be exposed...........and you and I would have to answer to it. Think about that when you find a teen on the adult grid.

But that's just me being self preserving.........the bigger potential is that 16 year running into a pedaphile or some other low life pervert and get herself in big trouble or come to harm in some way. Yeah, it may never come to that at all..........but what if it does? If you knew and it did happen, how would you look at yourself in the mirror for the rest of your life?

And what does the laws in Europe or any other place have to do with Linden Labs? They are located in San Francisco, California, United States of America. They must abide by the laws of this country.......there is no choice except for them to pack up and move to Europe or some other country to operate from.

Rat them out..........it's the right and proper thing to do. And yes wrong is wrong........just as right is right. Not ratting them out is wrong. Ratting them out is right. Black and white.........no shades of grey.

It would be the end of the story, if the reported age were actually verified. But it's not, and therefore has no real meaning except as a mild form of legal protection for LL's benefit.

Thus "ratting out" someone has no effect. That person could simply deny being a minor. That person could simply open a new account under a different name. Etc.

-peekay

No, it's not. For females the age of consent is 18 in only eight of the 50 US states! In Iowa and South Carolina it is 14. In places like Colorado or Texas it is 17. In the vast majority of the US, it is 16.

-peekay

Not sure why you really asked the question when you already know the answer:



If you thought there was nothing wrong with the situation, you wouldn't have the doubts and asked what others think.

Broccoli

.. and is being 95 wrong? Forgive me but I'm getting a distinct feeling of deja vu here. Wasn't there a 6 page thread on almost this exact topic just last week. What a soapbox we like to jump on huh?
The protagonists are consenting. Their ages are unprovable in the present situation.
I agree, rat the 16 year old girl out. At the very least, she is breaking the TOS ... but then as Peekay says, she can just create another account ... in the present situation.

Um .. do we know the "25 year old" is US?

Black and white? oh no .. SL has created many shades of grey.

sure, betray your friend , go for it , he/she will be very happy to have a tard as friend

Is there an age of consent for VIRTUAL sex?

... and then feel crap about it when you find out they were abducted and murdered by some wierdo on the internet, knowing FULL WELL that you could have prevented it happening by doing something very simple.

Whatever you - or others - think of the situation, the fact still remains that a 16 year old has no place on the adult grid. Period. That cannot be overcome by any amount of personal interpretation.

The grids are kept separate for very good reasons.

Broccoli

I would personally suggest to her that she move to the teen grid. If she declines, then for her own benefit, you must report this to LL and they will move her over. End of story really. She shouldnt be here.

For all extended purposes it is still 18. The idea being with all the various technologies it is better to hold on to RL values in this case and made it universal to cover all instead of each seperate state, country, county, city, neighborhood, house, insect, single celled organisms. 18 is (I think) the oldest age and/or the average (21 might be in there somewhere). Age to marry is younger but that is like tattoos "with parental concent".

That's why the teen grid was created. To keep the teens out of the adult content. Think of it like 24/7 PG land here in the mature grid (with obvious nudity while switching outfits).

In Britain the age of consent is 16, you can get married then too.

Just wondered if SL comes under the jurisdiction of the country the person is in, or the country the server is in.

Not so true. If they think you are under age, you have to prove that you are 18 or older. If you can't then you are done for. It is true that she can open a new account, but I would think that tracking that account via the hardware profile would prevent them from going to the Main Grid again. I know that when people from the same household are on both grids LL will sometimes ask questions.

And in Canada it's 14, what is the point?

SL is Not Canada, Great Britain Or the US. It's Second Life, and on the Second Life Main Grid Teens are NOT allowed. THAT is the Law that we are ALL sure is being Broken here.

Has anyone Given any thought to the poor 25 year old who probably thinks he is having a relationship with another Adult? How is he going to feel when he finds out he's been deceived, and put in this position? The fact WE have all these questions regarding what Is or is Not proper contact between an adult, and a Minor On, and Off the Net is just a sampling of everything that could go through HIS head and it would be the worse for him because for him it is NOT just an academic exercise. He has to Live it.

I sympathize because you want your friend Back on the Teen grid, But it would bother me if Your need was your ONLY concern. I Hope the fact your friend is engaging in behaviour that is Ill advised and, at best Unethical is More of a reason for you to feel like you should do something.

Lets just take one quick look at worst case scenario. Your friend gets in Too deep with this person, tells the truth about her age, and it doesn't make any difference. They arrange to meet, and He turns out to be some kind of Freak Job, and your friend ends up Raped, Missing, and/or Dead.
Like i said, WORST case scenario, but Not beyond the realm of Possibility.
Now ask yourself. "I had the Power to prevent this from Happening, and i just Sat on it, and Now my friend has suffered because of it. How do i Feel?"

Remember you May have to Carry the consequences of your decision for the rest of your Life, and since you are 16 also, that's a Long time to haul something like that around.

Right now the Choice is yours, Let your Conscience be your guide.

Angel.