The Mating Habits of the Gridbound Human

I'm posting this with a widely unknown Alt account, as to avoid being accused of advertising my shop this way

My main account runs a shop specialized in sex articles, mostly BDSM toys and machinery, where I installed demo versions of every article. I often bought toys advertised by a nice display only, without being able to give them a "test ride", and sometimes I turned out to be quite disappointed. I wanted to spare my customers this experience and also prove that my wares really had all of the described features, not just 2 sound effects and a texture animation.
It worked well while the store was still small and widely unkown. Perhaps it also worked well because SL had less than a million accounts and required some proof of adult age and identity. Sure, many people gathered at my place just to play with the wares, but they behaved and didn't annoy other customers; they rather made themselves useful as living display dummies.

Today, with a larger store, a larger range of products and effective advertising, it's quite a mess. The usual customer base (BDSM lifestylers looking for sophisticated humiliation toys) seems to stay away, and I can imagine why. The shop has turned into one large ongoing orgy, with naked males lingering in every corner to wait for female prey. I sometimes use this female alt account as a test customer, usually followed by several bans. Some of the sex tourists are of the textured & dressed sort, capable of basic speech (i.e. capable of using a keyboard to bluntly hit on everyone wearing a skirt), but most of the hormone-driven creatures are best described as standard newbie avatars without leg garment to show off crudely designed freebie genitals.

Yes, it is a sex shop and a mature area. And yes, the customers are encouraged to test the demo toys and poseballs. But that doesn't mean that a customer should have to deal with the mating rituals of the former WoW player, who seems to indicate his readiness by repeatedly bumping into females without ever uttering a single word. It also doesn't mean that females should be subject to a barrage of IMs in the lines of "hey u wanna plya???", or that escorts are free to offer and advertise their services. And it surely doesn't mean that a dark skinned resident is prepared for pickup lines like "U wanna be my negro sex slave?" (as reported this morning).
Even at a club or public dungeon such behaviour would be uncalled for. I'd expect at least one line of chat before someone jumps at me, and be it only a simple "Hi, may I hump your leg Ma'am", with the option to say No. In a shop environment it's even less acceptable. I can't see any of this happening in an RL adult shop. People seem to ignore all common codes of behaviour and basic courtesy in a virtual world, at least in an adult environment.

Banning unverified accounts is not an option (sorry to bring this up at all, it's just one of the solutions that comes to mind). I could just as well restrict the access to females only, it would be a similar unfairness. When I check the transaction history (of my main account) and the profiles behind the purchases, I can see that more than 20% of my revenue is created by unverified accounts. And 50% of the griefers / cagers on my ban list are verified residents.
How do other shops in SL try guarantee an undisturbed shopping experience for their customers? Removal of all adult demo material, just plain displays? Large signs with behavioral rules? Shop security, hired to be around 24/7? Any other ideas?

I'm a not-quite-so-newbie but not a shop owner either.

I've spotted a few places where a shop has integrated with a dance floor. Something like this might give some attraction for regulars to 'police' the area rather than pay security staff as such. It may even tempt customers to linger longer with possible commercial rewards.

Have you got a limited entrance space that an unavoidable sign can be placed stating rules of conduct mebbe?

Some sites I have visited have pop-ups explaining the terms of the owner for behaviour/dress etc.

Of course, none of this is guaranteed to stop the dedicated miscreant but how many of these do it cos they see it happening and think it's ok?

If I put myself to a role of a customer (unlikely, but not completely impossible ), I should think a good shop security 24/7 with morons banned quickly could work very well as an advertisement point to your intended customer basis.

Bianca - Either I know exactly who you are, or I know another similar shop with exactly the same problem.

Have a public shop but also a private shop for preferred customers (say, anyone who actually has bought things).

Hmm, group restriction, VIP access?

You could try finding someone that you know and trust who is willing to keep an eye on the store (sales assistant, not trigger-happy security), and hopefully the mere presence of someone with a store group-title would be enough to deter anyone from rude behaviour.

As a plus, when they get familiar with your products, they can handle questions from potential buyers as well .

Would adding an "unsit timer" to the poseballs help any as well? 30 Seconds should be enough to try-before-you-buy, but it would be a real annoyance for anyone trying to actually use them for "play".

ROFL Sorry but that just stirred up an image of a queue .. with the likes of 'oi! hurry up! I want a go!'

Seen several places with this problem, in varying degrees. One place uses a variation on the camping technique to put models on or in the machines, with single-person poses so they can't be "joined" by any goon passing by - most of those guys don't know how to bring up a poseball menu. Another (Mistress Knows best) has just shopper-displays in the shop (ie, flat graphics) with a charming "display space" next door.

Speaking as a RL fetish club operator (once again, after a gap of a few years!), the most effective anti-aphrodisiac for the horny single desocialised male, is an openly gay shop assistant, greeter, or piece of equipment (the "felching chair" or "spleen wobbler's stool" should do the trick). Mind you, in some places, charming little brats like to drop cages or leave ply boxes over the poseballs in items whose use they dislike...

"When the wind blows a wise Avatar builds a windmill and sells the electricity generated back to the Grid."

So I think I know who you are too, I would suggest having a small part of your Island/shop the place where people teleport into, and charge access to the main area, say 10 Lindens for an hour or so.

Refund that entry fee on purchase of your goods and services, and in addition offer your more regular clients free access.

Hi Bianca,
Though I haven't really explored the world of sex in SL (spend most of my time making things and hanging with friends), this may do it. Try vnedors for your wares with a dress code posting in shop. Then create a sort of an "enclosed demo dungeon" or "undressing room" so to speak. I know it wouldn't prevent idiots from being rude, but may help to contain the problem. That way anyone heading into the dark corner in the back knows what they're in for. lol

Well, I'm an evil kitty so this is what I would do. Make a female alt, and then head off to the furry sims and find the biggest wiener I could find. Then start patrolling my store. When one of these guys comes over to you and says, "hey u wanna plya???", just whip out "Big Bubba" and say "Yes! Lets get it on!". Then chase them around the store with "Big Bubba" till they leave.

I like putting on a male shape while keeping my female skin

rotflmao

Thank you

You've given me an interesting idea for how to handle the griefers who routinely pester us at bi group meetings *evilgrin*

Maybe they're lonely LOL LOL LOL

My spouse suggests private dressing rooms with rezzable temp 'toys'. That way customers can try in private.

As someone who has shopped in places like this, I'll agree this kind of behavior is very annoying... and has also cost the shop owner some guaranteed sales. I've had losers chase me from aisle to aisle and never DID get what I went there for in the first place. As a result, I hesitate to go back... I dont want the hassle.

Ok chere, question asked, and answered all in One. Most of the people Outside the D/s community tend to think of our Gathering places as one huge non-stop Orgy, but in actual Fact most of our more Intimate Practices Are done in Private. Sceneing takes Place, but it's an event, Not the Norm.
Your shop used to be Small, and in a word, Intimate. a Dom/me and thier slave(s) could Browse, and try out the equipment in relative peace, and privacy, but when you got Big, and began attracting the socially challenged you lost this Customer Base. No slave owner will long tolerate some obnoxious stranger leaping onto a Sex toy and being rude or pushy with thier Favorite slave. They will stop coming because they find the atmosphere coarse, crude, and tasteless (As odd as it sounds coming from people who use whips and melted wax for Intimate moments), but then, it has been my experience that most in our lifestyle seek a certain Class or Refinement.
If you want your Business to Improve, Close it as it is now (If it has a Bad rep, customers won't come back no matter what changes you make under the original name) and Reopen in a series of Smaller shops Each offering a Baseline of Goods, but adding variations for each location. The smaller locations will discourage the Larger crowds and Party Atmosphere, and as anyone knows, griefers seek out Crowds for the Maximum "Hey everybody, Look at me!!" Effect.
Add the thirty second Dismount scripts to your test models, and consider setting them in Cubicles (Closed on three sides, Open on One) to Improve that Intimacy.

The Mood and Atmosphere you are Looking for is Tiffany's, NOT Walmart.

Angel.

P.S.: If you decide to take this route, and wish a consultant to assist with the correct Flavor, Call me.

A.

I went into the changing rooms at one of the larger stores recently to try on some clothes and was accosted by a naked male - I pointed out to him that this was the women's changerooms and that he should be next door, his reponse:

"I know but this is a great place to pick up chicks"

Yeah, the one and only time I visited shop with "try out" models of sex toys there was an idiot humping everyone in sight. It could have been your store, who knows?

Maybe hiring security would be a good idea, if it's within your budget. Or the temp rez or "unsit" thing, that could work. But, it's true what Angelica said, your store has a rep now, perhaps a move and reopen would be a good idea as well. I know after my experience, I wouldn't go back, it's certainly worse now that it was back then.

This brings up a disturbing mental image of there being a kind of "zit-busters" forum somewhere out there where hormonally disadvantaged types swap SLURLs of "great places to hump chicks, dude"...

I loves your store to pieces if it 'da one I think it is, but I gotta tell you i think some of thoze big penis crowd types they go and do a finger-walk through search 'an if your place is what I thinks, its got some words in there that are real easy for non-clueful wanker types to find when they want to go an do the cheap thrills (your brain must be *this* small to ridez the ride) bit.

How 'bout changing your store's name on search to somethin' people in da scene would know to search for, like bdsm or collar or leather or somethin? It won't be a cure-all but hey it'd cut down some of it. Or just takes your store off search an' count on word-o-mouth?

Or maybez you 'kin make some tacky scripted "big parts" and scatter them in goodie freeby boxes all over, 'an when anyone wearin one comez in on your property the script auto-teleport them home?

Also, I see in that there official-types blog unner' customer service something somethings they're planning big changes in allowin' people to have more control over settling disputes themselves 'an stuff so there's hope out there (maybez).

I 'spose you could's also make a new group, "Friends of the store" or something 'an they gets eject rights, make it self-policing some more but gah I don't know how THAT woulds play out...although the image of me wanderin' arounds with bunny ears and an' itchy trigger finger makes me smile some

'an I likes the 30 second tryouts but bein' geekygirl I dunno how that can be done easy without havin' everyone sellin' stuff there having to rewrite their code *bites lip* maybe a 2nd script can run 'long side that does that since you can force a stand action.

I'd hate 'ta see it forced to being parted out to smallish vendor spots 'cause that takes away some of the fun of always bumping into interesting people but sometimes a place gets too fun I guess.

Since it's your place of business and you're there alot whether with your alt or your main then you know who these indiviuals are for the most part. Therefore, why should you consider this to be a big problem?

Solution: Kick out these idiots and keep them out. They might return with alts of their own so you do the same to them. Sooner or later you'll of gotten rid of them or at least the majority and problems solved.

I can't understand why you can't ban them? These people which you see in most of these shops just hanging around, don't spend any money so banning them won't cost you any lost revenues. I mean, just look at them, they don't even buy clothes or anything to make themselves look better and you think they'll spend money on sex toys and you'll lose out?

You don't have to hire security or anyone to watch the place or anything else. This shouldn't even be considered a problem if you kick them out and keep them out.

Ban them and your problems solved, thats it!

A little observation might also reveal exactly how many troublemakers there are. Many reports of a "u wanna be my slave" harrasser might resolve down to a very few individuals.

What you need is a no-penis rule. Don't ban all men, just the ones without any clothing on and sporting a cock. Write your rules something like:

1. No guns
   
2. Clothed is required, display of private parts is prohibited
   1. No cocks
      
   2. No clits
      

Moving the shop is probably a good idea. There is a networked security system for groups (forget the name), you may want to join up with other adult entertainment sells to link your security systems. Chances are these folks move from shop to shop.

@Tygarys: what do you do about the guys who like "Big Bubba"?

I think you should let the newbies get it out of their system, they'll eventually grow bored and move on to other things. We've all done juvenile stuff when we were new because we didn't know any better. Or hand them a landmark to an escort service.