So I need some ideas and a giggle regarding Spybots.

After finding three spybots on my land from someone known to me but not a friend, I filed the relevant AR's and returned one bot prior to finding out what they actually do.

Appears that they IM the owner only if they are online with who is on sim and what they say if within 10mtrs.

So now of course... returning the remaining two would be easy .. but i think i deserve to have fun with the jerk that planted them. I've already set my home location to between the two of them, double the im's every single time i hop back to my sim and it appears he is already getting frustrated with only 10 minute playtime by me last night.

Of course, my sim is now locked tight and he is unable to come collect them himself.

So now I'm calling on all forum members with a sense of humor, what would you do for your small entertainment with this object ?????

Giggles .. of course not harming any avator or breaking any rules

If he knows where they are, he can stand on a neighboring plot and cam in to pick them up.

Private island sim .. so nope .. cam'ing isn't going to help him at all.

Scripting an objects to whisper things on channel 0 springs to mind.

You could, say, have a storyteller object read out a story to those who are near. Do be aware of copyright issues, so I suggest a classical fairytale or something neutral and available like that.

Does it relay object chat? If so, place an object between the two (for double IMs) and have it say a Confucius quote at random once every hour or so. Name it "Confucius Say". It might be funny at first, but once it gets repetitive... lol

ETA: Maybe better yet is to have a random timer from 15 minutes to 1 hour so he won't know exactly when it's coming. lol

From a quick Google:

Crowded elevator always smell different to midget.

Dumb man climb tree to get cherry, wise man spread limbs.

Don't drink and park - accidents cause people.

State of pregnancy exist when woman takes seriously something poked in fun.

He who buries a man's wife alive, should not expect to sit at that man's dinner table without the subject coming up.

He who plays with self, pulls boner.

Baseball all wrong -- man with four balls cannot walk.

House without toilet is uncanny.

Man trapped in brothel get jerked around.

Man's wife his better half, his mistress his better whole.

Panties not best thing on earth, but next to it.

It is good for girl to meet boy in park, but better for boy to park meat in girl.

Man have more hair on chest than woman, but on whole woman have more.

Man who cut self while shaving, lose face.

Man who eats photo of father, soon spitting-image of father.

Man who lay woman on ground gets piece on earth.

Man who plays with self pulls boner.

Man who take sleeping pill and laxative on the same night will wake up in deep sh*t.

Man who pushes piano down mineshaft get tone of A flat miner.

Man who sneezes without tissue takes matters in his own hands.

Wise man never play leapfrog with unicorn.

Man who suck woman's tit make clean breast of things.

Man who walk in middle of road get run over by bus.

Wife not part of furniture, until screwed on bed.

Woman laid in tomb may soon become mummy.

Man who fall in vat of molten glass make spectacle of self.

Man who jizz in cash register come into money.

Man with tight trousers is pressing his luck.

Man who gets kicked in testicles, left holding bag.

Man who crosses the ocean twice without washing is a dirty double crosser.

Man who drive like hell, bound to get there.

Man trapped in pantry have ass in jam.

Don't sweat the petty stuff ... and don't pet the sweaty stuff.

Woman who wear jockstrap have make believe ballroom.

Woman who slides down banister makes monkey shine.

Man who scratches ass should not bite fingernails.

Man who tell one too many light bulb jokes soon burn out.

Woman who puts detergent on top shelf, jump for Joy.

So basically you have a way to IM him that he can't mute because they are his own objects and he can't retrieve them. Maybe some poetry?

Yes, send him poetry! Preferably very longwinded and awful poetry. I offer for your consideration the works of William McGonagall (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/William_McGonagall).

I would get a copy and paste of that fecken annoying foreign spam I get sent through store group IMs every day and just share the love that way.

OMG Hugsy you have me laughing so hard with some of those!!!!

I'm a wee bit crueler ... I think i'd have to have it set for between 3-8 minutes, cause after all .. going to kill any date or cyber session if you have those whispers popping up on your screen for every moment your logged in.

easiest thing.. get a lucky chair and set the letter to change every 3 minutes... the thing will whisper and comment and blah blah so much.. it will drive him bonkers...

If you *really* want to annoy him/her then you should identify WHY the bots were put there and take the action that would be most specifically annoying, rather than just spew out text that is just boring.

Pep (If he is jealous, then give him a reason to be even more jealous)

Be extremely boring maybe he or she will lose interest.
But isn't spying against the TOS?

I think that this is fantastically wonderful!!
It's magical justice.

It's their own object giving themselves grief.
They'll have to AR themselves to try get the Lindens to zap it. Yowsa!!
They might have a problem identifying the precise location in the AR.

If his bugs do relay object chat, then somethings that snuggle up and whisper to them would minimise the effect on people in the sim.

How about a looped conversation along the lines of?

>>>
What's that thing?
It's a chat-bug.
A chat-bug? What does that do?
(explanation...)
Oh! What kind of a sick sad-ass would plant something like that?

I wonder if you could log in some alts, each a Tolstoy character, and have some fun that way...

Book one, chapter one here.

http://www.online-literature.com/tolstoy/war_and_peace/1/

But like this:

AnnaPavlovna Scherer: "Well, Prince, so Genoa and Lucca are now just family estates of the Buonapartes. But I warn you, if you don't tell me that this means war, if you still try to defend the infamies and horrors perpetrated by that Antichrist- I really believe he is Antichrist- I will have nothing more to do with you and you are no longer my friend, no longer my 'faithful slave,' as you call yourself! But how do you do? I see I have frightened you- sit down and tell me all the news."

(doesn't it sound like SL drama anyway!)

And if that's the case, be sure to make it clear how *very* much better at it the current person is than the last one you had.

Well to get rid of bots the easy way...

If it's your land, you have push rights. And thus you take the biggest gun you have, and launch rather large projectiles at them with smilies on the top of the projectile.

Then smile while you see them fly off like crash dummies, and make them your neighbours problem.

If you've returned one they probably have a fair idea the jig is up anyway.

Right, but the premise is that they can't actually avoid getting spammed by their own device, despite knowing it's no longer relaying G2. (I'm not entirely sure that's true, btw: they can always mute you. But ignoring that is too much fun. )

If it were me, I'd script up something that temp-rezzes something else on a random timer (hoping that it will be more difficult to mute the temporary somethings, and that they won't choose to mute you and thereby everything owned by you)... and have it generate random selections of ASCII art from the N00b Club Collection.

[EDIT: immediately after posting, I realized that manual muting is irrelevant, inasmuch as it's their own device sending the spam. On the other hand, the spy bug could be scripted to be remotely muted somehow, so that's still a consideration. Note to self: Include remote controls for next spy script.]

Passages from the Congressional Record?

Please keep us informed what you end up doing and how it goes. Too funny.

Get a couple of these (they're free) and let them talk to each other - it's free therapy! Or better let, put one next to the Confucius quoter and let it comment on great wisdom.
http://www.xstreetsl.com/modules.php?name=Marketplace&file=item&ItemID=439564

Item description:
Eliza Doolittle Chatbot

Summary
Parody of a Rogerian therapist

Description
ELIZA is a famous 1966 computer program by Joseph Weizenbaum. It was made as a parody of a Rogerian therapist. it rephrases many of the patient's statements as questions and poses them to the patient. Solve all of your avatars emotional problems with this parody of an Rogerian therapist. Open Source Scripts allow customization.

Example

You: hi
Eliza Doolittle: how do you do--please state your problem.
You: i don't have a problem
Eliza Doolittle: does that trouble you?
You: no
Eliza Doolittle: you are being a bit negative.
You: does that trouble you?
Eliza Doolittle: we were discussing you-- not me.
You: you have the problem.
Eliza Doolittle: oh, i have the problem
You: yes
Eliza Doolittle: i see.

Features

* Full permissions with Open Source.
* Listens and responds to nearby residents.
* Great for parties to get conversations going.
* No dependency on third party websites.
* Rephrases what resident said into a logical response.
* Customizable note card to change responses
* Does not repeat the last response it gave.

Ahh fair enough, in that case put an invisible prim over the top of their spyprim too so they can't click it or better yet they get a message when clicking the outer prim that says something like "chatspy45 going rogue, EXTERMINATE!"
Or maybe "This Chatspy does not belong to you"

the owner can allways mute them bots when he/she gets annoyed

What about the "Whos on first" speel?

/me waves his hand!

Oh, I have an idea. Go to SLU and find Trout's Mexican Soap Opera. Have your story teller read that to him over and over again.