Taking things from the forum to world?

No names. I mean this thread as a way to discussion whether or not you let issues spill from the forum to in-world. Those of you who know the story, please refrain from stating the name or I will report your post for abuse myself.

I leave my issues on the forum. I can argue with someone here, and then log in and not give it another thought. This is a forum meant for debate.

When a person takes a negative experience from the forum and drags it in world, I try and respond simply with that I'd prefer to keep it to the forum. I dont' mind debating stuff in SL in world, but when things are heated, the forum is where they stay.

When someone ignores this request, I ignore them. If someone harasses me, I report them and ignore them.

But.

When someone goes and harasses many of my friends on their land at their event, I draw the line. I recently (finally) muted and banned someone for this. Frustrating.

I will refrain from mentioning names but a few months ago I posted a somewhat abrasive string of posts condeming LL's seeming lack of sense in that they forged ahead blindly with new gizmos without stablizing their base product first. I Im'ed one of the people I was arguing with in the forums stating that this was nothing personal and boy was I blasted!

It seems that some people do take this forum stuff to In-World and I am sorry now that all I wanted to do was say that what's said in the forums should stay in the forums.

People who really give me a smile on the forums often find themselves gifted with some free product in-world. I've informally dubbed it the Golden siegeBot award, and its something I do once or twice at month at most. Occasionally I'll follow up on something interesting I heard someone say via in-world IM, just because I like the instant gratification.

As for hostilities, I avoid using the grid to handle anything nasty that originates in the forum. On the rare occasions individuals have tried to drop their forum hostilities on me in-world, I've tried not to bite.

I've had more than one occaision where someone on the forum harrassed me in-world because of something I stated on the forums.

I've alsy had someone post pictures of my home in-world in order to make fun of me in the forums.

To me the forums are tightly integrated to the game. Trying to separate the two is like trying to uninstall a program on Windows, too many files and registries and dll's are interconnected.

From: Seth Kanahoe

Thank you for spewing sense into this thread.

I honestly don't see the difference between the forums, in-word, on the phone, through skype, written letter, morse code, or smoke signals. What people convey they convey. Short of multiple personality disorders, I don't know how I could form a freindship in the forums and pretend that person is a stranger in world.

I think people will avoid the "always" option in this poll because the implication is a bit more diabolical. What is hinted (not necessarily by Hiro) is the scenario where we have a heated (but legitimate) debate in the forum and then take petty revenge in world. This is not an issue about joining the forums with in-world...this is an issue of pettiness.

If I have a legitimate heated debate IN-WORLD it's just as wrong to take petty revenge against them in-world as it would be had the debate occured in the forum. Also, I will not treat someone differently if they shout a stream of slander and profanity against me in-world versus doing it on the forums.

It is the behavior that matters, not the medium through which the behavior is expressed.

nice post aimee. I would have to agree -- how someone chooses to communicate and present themselves affects how I view them across all mediums.


I don't believe in branding and judging people too quickly -- as a general rule. Some people have a short forum temper and a flambe writing style, but are quite cool in world (maybe because we don't discuss lightning-rod topics all the time in-world?). But regardless of the mix, all behavior goes into the ongoing understanding of who that person is.

Forum behavior has affected my first impressions in-world, both positively and negatively, but when it's negative I usually try to give people a second chance, especially when its temper, not outright stupidity, they are guilty of.

Totally agree. I see no reason why the forums are somehow 'over there' and different, its just another method of communication. The problem is the harassment; the fact that the dialogue started in the forums is irrelavant. The things we say, and the way we act here are *going* to have an affect on the way we interact with those same people in world.

Yeah it's all One...

What i am and do on the forums is what i am and do inWorld - it's all the illusion within the dream of exiestance - it don't exist 'cept in your mind.

So dream it as beautifully as you're able to!

I voted other because I talk about forum issues inworld. Sometimes it's further discussion with people that are posting, but only if we can get along well enough to discuss or debate the topic. Sometimes it's information for people who don't read the forum but might be affected by the issue or the posters.

That's not always a bad thing. I'm telling nonlurkers about the log-a-thon, the convention, Linden replies to questions and arguments et cetera. They're not much interested in the dhrama or the jokes or our mindless ramblings. That's why they don't lurk.

I will qualify the point that I don't retaliate inworld; but then I don't get involved in a lot of scraps either. HWSBN was the first and, to date, only person I've ever muted but that was as much world related as forum. Then I felt childish and silly about it. Using the negative rating system would probably have the same effect.

I don't seperate the forums from the world. If someone claims to be a seperate person on the forums, well... they can roleplay all they like, but I'm under no obligation to play along and seperate one persona from another. It's all the same to me, and you will be seen how you represent yourself here and in world, together. If I gain a dislike for someone in the forums, it will taint how I view them inworld. But I tend to ignore people I dislike, rather than harass them. (At least until I get a 3 Stooges Slap and can line them up.)

Harassing someone in world is harassing, regardless of where their beef with you began.

Generally, for me, what happens in the forums stays in the forums. There are only a couple of exceptions. First, if the topic is an instructional question that I have answered, sometimes I follow up inworld with the person who asked in order to make sure they got it. There are some things that are really best taught by showing, not just by explaining. But whenever possible, I try to keep the answers strictly on the forum so that more people can benefit from the information. It kind of urks me when someone askes a question, and the first person to anser says, "I'll meet you inworld at 6 p.m. and show you," and then the thread dies without benefiting anyone except the one person. To me, that's just not what forums are for.

Second, there was one time when someone got a little pissy on the forums over what I knew had to be a simple misunderstanding, and she said she was going to mute me over it. Since it was clear at that point that the matter could not be resolved on the forums, I tracked her down inworld and straightened everything out, or so I thought. I was evidently wrong though, since the very next time she and I crossed paths on the forums she made a point of demanding a public apology from me for a whole host of imaginary crimes, calling my inworld apology wimpy, and accusing me of somehow having tried to play nice behind the scenes so I could somehow be a more effective meanie on the forums, or some such nonsense. I guess what I learned from that experience is that if someone freaks out on the forums, just let them be. It's natural to want to resolve the situation through conversation, but the effects may not last, and ultimately it just gets worse. If they freaked out once, they'll freak out again, so you might as well just leave it alone inworld, and not take the risk that it could affect your inworld experience.

I've been thinking about this. The only way to have the two completely separate would be if we had different names on the message boards than we had in-world. Also that we didn't reference anything specific that happened in-world. We would say this avatar or an avatar, but never reveal any "real" in-world names. And there wouldn't be no advertising of stuff in world, all advertising would be done in world but not on the forums.

Otherwise there is a connection.

From: Seth Kanahoe

Thank you for spewing sense into this thread.

Well I certainly used. After being called one two many ugly/foul names. I took it in world and voiced my opinion with an appropriate rating.

I presume people are unpleasant here as it is a reflection of their real life personality. I therefore act accordingly.

Oh, I always take forum issues in world with near total consistency.
Someone wants a script snippet, I drop it on thier profile. They want a freebie I have a copy of, I send it to 'em. They don't understand something SL's doing and I have the answer, I'll show up and try to help. They post about something really neat they're selling, I'll go to thier shop to buy.

I mean: duh.

Yeah, duh.

I do see the forums as a different environment than SL (or talking to someone one on one in IM or on the phone/voice chat), simply because it is an environment where we can address an entire group of people at once. Most communications in world are on a much more personal level.

We do have group situations at events, but there is nothing in world that comes close to the scope of reach we have in the forums. It is also not a completely real time medium, unlike the others mentioned, since we have the ability to write out and edit our posts fully before sending. This completlely changes the flow of conversations. As such, it has a different purpose, feel, and set of rules, and to lump it all together does not fully take into account what is unique about the forums, or what causes some of the behaviors seen here that you do not see with in world communications.

The only time I take something from the forums in world generally is to IM someone personally to try to clarify or diffuse a situation, since I find people are reasonable if you talk directly to them even if it is a flame fest in the forums (with some notable exceptions). Sometimes I have seen things, like a player who received some really harsh anti-Semitic remarks and an outraged friend posted for her. I imed them to offer my sympathies, as I know how random and unexpected that sort of thing is to encounter in SL.

I will also often do the same thing that Enabran does - if someone particularly amuses me, I will just randomly send them stuff. I find it a lot more fun to buy stuff for other people since my inventory is overflowing. You would be surprised sometimes who the recipients are (like Cocoanut receiving a tiny koala avatar). Aimee Weber is also good in the quid pro quo department - she has given me enough stuff to start my own PREEN outlet store.

Certainly, someone's behavior in the forums makes me wary of (or interested in) them in world, but for the most part, I have never met 95% of the people I see in these forums. I think it is a mistake to take arguments from the forums in world, except to try to resolve them. I have been harassed before in world by someone from the forums, and it was not pleasant. Thank god for the mute button.

I've been tripple neg rated 3 times by the same person and their alts because heated discussions in the forums. This was a very special person though.

Oh yeah, I forgot about the triple neg rates - me too I consider them a badge of honor. They were also met with the funniest offline IM I have ever received - I will PM it to you Ingrid

With the exception of the harassment (sorry, Christiano), this has been my experience. I will discuss what is going on in the forums in-world. In fact, some of the more interesting conversations I have had involved forum issues, and some of the most fascinating people I have met are regular forum posters. Seems win-win to me.

I have never been harassed in-world, but, then again, I have never really expressed an opinion in the forums.

I am truly sorry to hear that this kind of thing goes on. Harassing someone in-world seems like a tremendous waste of time and energy.

I tend very much to leave forum discussions in the forums. By and large I don't know or associate with many people from the forums in world, although I must say that I genuinely like everyone from the forums I have had in world action. To my mind, the issues in the forums are very much drawn on narrow issues. I find that many disagreements in the forums are born of an irrational passion for a particular position, and, if you know the person outside of that context, they are very different.

I can think of at least one poster here for who I have the utmost regard as a person in both the forums and in world, and I greatly value most of her wisdom and humor. However on the Subject of Prokofy I passioantely disagree with her conduct towards him. I truly feel under the TOS, if strict enforcement wwere in place, she would be at risk of dsicpline, including banning. But her offensive remarks are confined to only one subject. I think it would be a loss and a mistake to ban this person, and deprive SL of a valuable community member.

I think in setting rules that could result in someone losing the privilege of accessing SL, we should always err on the side of lieniency. I think most flames on the forums, evne those by the famous gadfly, were more akin to crimes of passion, and thus the whole deterrent argument rings hollow. I mean look how effectively the death penalty detterent has prevented murder.

My thought is that if someone truly is a "Jackass" in both the forums and the world, then their behovior will ineveitably surface and they will be banned for both. If building a bit of compassion inot the rules that govern our society means that I need to put up with someone's idiocy a bit more, then so be it, I will abide.

The forums are an argument, the world is an environment.

Besides, ultimately, if someone offends you, you can always avoid or ignore them, on the forums or in world. And if they harass you, abuse report them. You truly don't have to interact with someone you hate, whether or not they are banned.

You should link some of the posts that highlight her offensive remarks and conduct, in particular the ones where she has placed herself at risk of dicipline and banning.

I also don't see the forums as somehow seperate from SL. I have a short mental list of people that, based on their forum behaviour and opinions, I basically consider radioactive in SL. I don't wish them any harm, but I'd go out of my way to avoid them.

My point was to be more obscure than less obscure. I do like this person.

This thread is getting melancholy. Please try to be more amusing when you post. Remind me to tripple neg rate all of you when i see you next time for dissapointing me like this.