Worst Star Trek Plot Device

LOL! I agree, Chosen! In fact, from the ill-fated ST:Enterprise, we learned in "Daedalus" that a long-range teleporter was in the works ("sub-quantum teleportation". Yeah, it caused a death or two, but so did regular transporter technology. They seemingly abandoned it too easily.

BUT, then again, ST:Enterprise was a train wreck, so... there ya go.

If they were too good, Scot Bakula would have "Leaped" to a new body.

Okay so this isn't a plot device but it is occurs on almost every show so that certainly makes it a motif, no? It is best exemplified by the hypothetical dialog I once heard:
I'm not really a trekkie, so expect that joke may be older than me.

Are you *sure* that they would fall through the floor? They are in zero gravity!
Besides, who's to say that the Artificial Gravity System wouldn't work on phased bodies? Suppose it roots their feet to the floor and propels them around based on their movements, leaving rest of the body free to bump the walls? (Or not bump, in this case.) Come to think of it, that might be how SL works too, when I dance I pass through nearby objects/people, but I don't fall through the floor. Hmm now I've got to check that episode for little elliptical shadows hovering around their ankles.

No doubt the Bat-Utility Belt also includes some anti-gravity device, how else could Batman and Robin climb buildings so easily on a slender rope? You can see its effects trailing behind them, almost as if their capes were supported by invisible threads. If only they could have reached it one of those times that Penguin had them suspended over some bubbling vat.

Failing that, don't forget the laws of Cartoon Physics as described by Chuck Jones in Chuck Amuck:


Clearly my disbelief hasn't looked down yet.

Cartoon physics!!



I'm gonna test this law. Any furry felines wanna volunteer?

Yeesh. Yeah. I stuck with it, because I loved "Quantum Leap" as a kid, and because I had nothing better to do on Friday nights, but it was really only entertaining if I MST3K'd it, with a friend or just in my head.

I hope there'll be a worthwhile Star Trek series in the future, but for now I'll stick with my Farscape DVDs.

Oh, and on-topic: holodeck. Yech.

OMG!! I remember that show! Far Out Space Nuts or something like that. And they end up with an alien sidekick named "honk" or something like that. I dont think it was Alan Hale Jr. though, I think it was Chuck McCann.

Ok, I'm reeeally dating myself by remembering this stuff.

That sounds to me like Trelane, the tantrum-throwing-playful-child-god Squire of Gothos (TOS). I didn't watch enough TNG episodes to know if they ever linked the two, but it occurs to me that Trelane was a bit too prone to tantrums to ever make "recurring character." Perhaps this was in fact a young Q before he learned he could get his way by simply pouting?

Holodeck, for sure... How hokey is that, the idea that people can create a digital world where they can just write a program or upload an image to find love and live out an alternate existence free from their... um ... first.. .life... n/m.

They linked the two in one of the books... no, he's not Q but he is a Q. Can't recall which book though...

"I, Q" was so good... I loved that one...

No... I can't find the book with Trelane in it

Bonsai Kitty?

Mirror Spock did not grin. Kirk even noted that except for the goatee, there was pretty much no difference between the Spocks.
I thought it was a good look for him, actually.

the 'my alien custom is forcing me to leave' plot line ugggh, sure I graduated starfleet but I have to marry some dweeb and make cookies now, sorry, oh i have to avenge my honor, oh my brother is evil so i have to leave urrrrgh

You've raised a good point, Boss. I'm actually embarrassed now that I didn't think of this before. Chip, this may save Star Trek for you.

Jordi and Roe would NOT have fallen through the floor on any Federation starship or space station for a very simple reason. Gravity on Federation ships and stations is generated artificially by "gravity plating", embedded in the flooring. Each individual plate is independantly adjustable, as was demonstrated when Archer trapped the Gorn on the Defiant by increasing the gravity on one specific section of flooring. Everyone else on the ship experienced normal gravity, presumably even those standing on decks directly above where the Gorn was trapped. This strongly indicates that any given gravity plate not only pulls down on objects above it, but also serves to negate the effects of other gravity plates below.

In other words, on a starship, gravity pulls you onto the floor of whatever deck you happen to be on. The gravity plating on one deck does not affect people above or below that deck.

So, while Jordi and Roe probably would have had a bit of a hard time adjusting to the fact that their feet had no traction against the floor surface, it's reasonable to assume they could have learned to walk without too much difficulty. Walking is largley a matter of falling and catching yourself. Since the gravity plating functions to keep objects above it at the same time as it pulls them down towards it, catching yourself by landing on your foot after taking a step would certainly be possible, even if you were frictionless. Traction is not a necessity, although I'd imagine it would take a lot of work to keep yourself from falling over without it.

Of course, there was that one episode when the floor phased, and a crewman fell halfway through it before it unphased (ouch!), suggesting that gravity plates can affect people on decks above their own, but that's explainable as well. It's reasonable to assume that when that particular deck section phased out of normal space, it lost power since it was no longer connected with the rest of the ship. Without power, the gravity plate on that deck could not operate, meaning it couldn't counteract the gravity from the deck below any more than it could continue to generate gravity for its own deck. With nothing to pull the crewman onto the higher deck, she fell down to the lower one. It all works.

So there's your explanation, Chip. If the supposed functionality of gravity plating or any other magical technology is not to your liking, fine, but hopefully now Jordi & Roe's particular response to gravity won't be enough to turn you off to the whole show. The same thing probably would have happened had they stepped onto the Galactica, by the way, since I'm pretty sure it's supposed to use gravity plating as well, and I know you love BSG.

It's Ro... not fish eggs...

Heh, well, caviar must be on my mind. Never said I was a good speller.

I voted time travel...it's like they ran out of imagination for a new set so resorted to time travel

That one would be "Q squared."

If I might recommend one, go with "Q-in-law"

It's not the gravity that's the problem (er, it is, but it's the minor problem). The major problem is that they're phased or dimensionally shifted or whatever so that they can't interact with the matter of the Enterprise. If you can't make physical contact with a control panel you're not going to be able to make physical contact with the floor or walls either. Even if the gravity worked for them they 'd still go right through the floor.

Hmm - actually I very much like Chosen's "technobabble" explanation for that - and suspension of such disbelief is what enjoying sci-fi is about

However, that ep was ruined for me when I realised that if they couldn't interact with anything becasue they were phased from it... how were they absorbing oxygen? that process requires interaction at the molecular level.

(Still, I loved watching Ro struggle with her religious leanings while annoyed at Geordi for still not beliving.)

You're missing the point, my friend. They don't have to make physical contact with the floor at all. They're still tethered to it by gravity whether they can touch it or not. The artificial gravity is set up on each deck to pull objects to the floor level and no further. If you're standing on Deck 1, there's no way you can fall through to Deck 2 as long as the gravity plating on Deck 1 is functioning.

Isn't fictional technology fun?



Now there you may have a point. I'll have to think on that one. Uh, perhaps some of the air in the ship was phased by the same process that phased the people? Maybe phased air is always there, but those of us in normal space are just naturally unaware of it? Let me think on it some more.

I need them to at least meet me half way. I don't remember the episode that well anymore but was the ship dead in space? If it wasn't and they were "phased" then what force was keeping them moving along with the ship? They'd just float still in space while the ship moved on without them. There's just so many holes in the logic of that episode that suspension of disbelief isn't enough. You need to completely shut down the logic centers of your brain. SciFi should make you think, not require you not to.

That was the point of my second paragraph, and the third was the reason to like it anyhoo

No, not when they have to invent a new one in every episode to get them out of bad writing. Another thing that annoyed me is that every crew member was an expert of every scientific discipline and every system on the ship... and not just an expert. They were able to invent brand new technologies and find new theoretical uses for ship systems outside their own job descriptions and specialites. That's just silly. Don't get me wrong. I was a huge Star Trek fan for a long time and still have fond memories of it. It just doesn't satisfy me anymore.

The ship wasn't dead in space, no. The force that kept them moving along with it is the same force that keeps you from standing still while the earth turns on without you, simple inertia. They were moving along with the ship at the time they were phased, so they just kept on moving along with it.

Now you're probably thinking what if the ship turned, or stopped, or something like that, right? Two words, inertial dampeners, the same things that keep people from getting squished when the ship suddenly accelerates from a dead stand-still to super-light speed. Somehow Trek magic technology is able to control physics in really fun and impossible ways. None of it requires you to actually touch anything to receive the effects.

Okay, admit it, Chosen... you wrote for the show didn't you!