Navy SEALS

THIS TOPIC HAS.....

Earlier biblical text said, "Thou shalt not murder."

Here in Texas some ACLU members own guns. Few carry them in their belt though. More often firearms are carried in holsters.

A student sat in computer science class. He thought about how much money he had paid to be there, and how hard he'd worked in high school to get good grades.

It didn't surprise him when the professor started off on another off-topic rant. As an agnostic and member of the ACLU, the student shared some beliefs with the professor. Still the student wished he were getting the lecture he had paid for.

This time the professor called on God, if she existed, to knock him off the elevated lecture platform. The student wondered what this theological digression had to do with data structures and linked lists.

The student noticed a beefy man sitting to the side of class. This fellow was red-faced with anger. The angry man rose and walked to the front of the lecture hall. The man declared hope for expansion of the Patriot Act.

Without a word and with barely a glance, the professor and the man started fighting. They hung in mid-air like wire-foo film stars. They kicked, backflipped, and violated the laws of Newton.

The battle lasted long, but finally the professor stood over the man's motionless form. Bored students yawned and began leaving for their next class. One person asked if the details of the fight would be on the next exam.

Paramedics arrived to carry off the man the professor had knocked unconscious. Police showed up, and commented that the professor had beaten up "another one." The police and paramedics exchanged currency to settle their bets.

The student walked to the front of the room, and said, "Professor, I know you're hurt and bleeding and everything, but would you sign my drop form?"

The professor asked, "Why are you dropping? Planning to change majors?"

I'm shocked and offended.

What's a Navy SEAL? Is that like a grommet to keep water out of a bolt hole in a ship or sumptin?

Actually, its more like a cork which we occasionally have to shove in the bunghole of the world to prevent all the freedom from leaking out.

-Ghoti

[eddid cuz I kant spel.]

Deja Vu. Recon or not, my family is full of marines who'd be saying the same, if not something a little more lewd. Gotta love the healthy sibling rivalry going on in the armed forces.

Navy SEALS are always taught

1) Keep your priorities in order and 2) Know when
to act without hesitation.

A Navy SEAL was attending some church
between assignments. He had completed missions

in Iraq and Afghanistan.

One sermons by a fundementalist preacher denigrated
otehr americans who did not subscribe to his world view.


One day he shocked the congregation when he came in, looked
to the ceiling, and flatly stated, "God, if disagree with my preaching,

then I want you to strike me dead before I finish this sermon."

The congregation fell silent. You could hear a pin
drop. Ten minutes went by and the preacher proclaimed,
"Here I am God. I'm still waiting."

It got down to the last couple of minutes when the
SEAL got out of his chair, went up to the preacher,

and shot him dead.
The SEAL went back to
his seat and sat there, silently.


The other church members were shocked and stunned and sat
there looking on in silence. The police eventually

came, looked at the SEAL and
asked, "What the hell is the matter with you? Why
did you do that?"


The SEAL calmly replied, "God was too busy today

protecting America's soldiers who are protecting your

right to say stupid shit and act like an asshole.
So He sent me."

Wow that is so clever.

All these jokes are doing is portraying SEALs as people who don't think 5 minutes ahead.

Whee.


(I know it's an analogy... but most people with strong viewpoints, no matter what view they hold, I think are capable of thinking more than 5 minutes ahead. It's the ones who don't that get all the publicity )

Well one can be a marine, an atheist, and a memeber of the ACLU. And except for the fact that they are in the navy, most seals are all right guys.

True, but those type Marines will always be called "Private"

Mine too.

No some are called Captian, and others Major.
In the Marine Corps it is not necessary to belive in god, it is neccessary to belive in America, the Corps, and Chesty Puller.

And a "Jane Hanoi -- Go Home" bumper sticker.

OOOORAH!! That's Hanoi Jane however.