Stupid Kid Names.

Man, some people out there have no shame when it comes to naming their kids. What the hell is wrong with people who name their kids "America?" And why is it usually immigrants from Latin countries? Do people in Germany ever name their kid "Deutschland?" I bet America gets his ass kicked on the playground. Maybe it's like the Johnny Cash song "A Boy Named Sue," where the father named his kid Sue because he wanted him to grow up tough as nails.

What about "Neveah," "heaven backwards." That's like naming your kid "Candy" or "Cherry" and expecting them to go somewhere other than straight to the stripper pole.

What are some stupid kid names in your area? Any stupid foreign ones (please provide translations)?

Let's see... a couple I knew named one of their kids "Jonyce" a very weird variation on "Jonas" and they were very surprised that people mispronounce it all the time. BTW last I heard, they call him "Joe"

I would include anyone who substitutes a weird vowel for the regular one (like "Ayn Rand".

I find the mispronunciation thing hilarious as well. People seem to believe they can pronounce things any way they want, not realising perhaps that there are definite rules to the game.

Reminds me of that Monty Python skit where some guy has a long ridiculous nonsense name and when the interviewer tries to pronounce it the guy replies says, "Oh, it's actually pronounced 'Luxury Yacht'."

As in "Ghoti?"

Dick Trickle.....nuff said

I had to replace a hp faxcopier back in 97 or 98 and the support tech announced his name in an unsusually proud way... Dick Gold. I know he could have gone by Richard.

I have a niece named... (wait for it...) Pixie. Yes, Pixie, on the birth certificate and everything.

What possessed my brother to name a child that? Pure pettiness, IMO. He and his wife were pissed off that she wasn't a boy (this was back in the early 60's) that they could name (insert brother's name here) III (he's the II). It had never occured to his big ego that it might be a girl!

When she was about 12, my mother had a talk with Pixie and offered to have her name legally changed to anything she wanted... and she refused! She said it would be too confusing to just change names, she was already used to Pixie!

I actually love her name. It's unique. It is extremely rare to find anyone else with that name, and when you do it's almost never on their birth certificate, it's just their moniker. When Pixie and I were growing up I actually wanted a name more like hers - it was a drag being in a classroom with six other girls with my name, and since my last name started with a S, by the time I got called on by the teacher the 1st day of class, my name, and my nickname were already given to the other girls, and I ended up being called by my whole name (middle name included) all year long. Since I was only ever called by my full name at home when I was in really serious trouble, I would have a "fight or flight" reaction every time my name was called in class. Not very conducive to learning, if you know what I mean.

And now she's a porn starlet.

Cocoa Crisp

George, George II, George III, George IV, George V

This what George Forman named his kids

I have a distant cousin named...

Bambi

*sigh*

Mike Hunt.

yes his name was Mike Hunt and he went by Mike Hunt on purpose

lets see: star,honey, fantasia, diamond, trinity. Naming your girl any of these names will give them a head start in the exotic dancer industry,

I did this with my oldest daughter Krystina (common spelling Christina). The reason why is because I really loved that name but it was so common and I wanted her name to be unique. She is twelve years old now and she loves it! She is really happy that I spelt her name different because she likes the attention it gets (mostly positive). It can be annoying that its mispelled by others often, but we can't blame them.

MJ

Anything, anyone successful in music or television has EVER named their child..

What, you don't like Kal El for a name??? You don't like Superman!!!

Like Gwenyth Paltrow naming her daughter Apple.

America is a very common name in south america, and it's a girl's name, not a boy's. There's nothing special or cool about it, it's just like naming your kid Joe or Jane, it's a run of the mill kinda name. Maybe your surprise stems from not having heard it before *shrugs*

Weird names I've seen (actually friends of a friend):

Daouiyessi (yes in russian, french, english and spanish)
yotuel (I, you, him in spanish)

Both kids are siblings, sister and brother in that order. Cubans are a weird race.

I've seen more but these two traumatized me

Leilany

Stupidest name... Moon Unit Zappa

There's a guy I used to be in contact with a lot through my work - he worked for the City of Las Vegas. Anyway, his name was Dick Bonar.

Jason Lee (of My Name is Earl) named his kid Pilot Inspector Lee.

That is way stupider than anything I've come across in RL.

The following statements are absolutely TRUE. (Seriously, they are!)

[1] Quote: ''I used to be a birth recorder for a big hospital here in the bay area so I have a lot of stories. But the worst by far was a totally low class family that named their son: Pitbull Shotgun (last name). It was the most ridiculous thing I ever heard. I/and the county tried to talk them out of it for about a week before I finally had to transmit the birth certificate to state. How horrible.''

[2] I used to work at a computer store where the owner had named his two boys Xeron and Xondac, I believe was the spelling. Apparently, the names were from a Superman comic or something. Any experts that can verify that?

I think that falls under an allowed variant in that it is pronounced the same. I was mostly thinking of weird extra vowels that change the pronunciation but the owner of the name insists its still pronounced the old way. That's a pet peeve of mine.

I used to know a kid in school named Milton Cowlick (no kidding), can't imagine how he got a last name like Cowlick.

Melvyn is a first name that I've run across recently too... kind of different.

Brings to mind a skinny, geeky kid with big glasses and a cowlick, which he was.

.

FIRST thing that came to mind, except replace Gwenyth Paltrow for Chris Martin..

Or Cruz Beckham..