Using Friends List IM to Advertise Business?

I have been receiving advertising for her business from someone on my Friends List, the type of advertising that would usually be done through the business group and/or various related business groups.

I met this person in a class I took that lasted 10 weeks. We chatted on and off during those 10 weeks, mostly about homework, but since then, we both have gone back to our SL/ives. We have not had any contact for many months. Prior to the Friends List advertising, I also received a friends group IM asking for us to vote for her in some contest. That I didn't mind as much as I suppose one would ask friends to vote for them.

On a related topic, how do you feel about getting unsolicited offers to join someone's business group? The recent experience I had with this I didn't mind at all because the person who invited me is someone I knew casually on IRC for about 8 years and we recently discovered we were both on SL. Since I have known this person a long time, had been chatting and reminiscing, her offer had some background to it.

Personally I would never use my Friends List to advertise my business. I would personally never offer unsolicited invitations to my group. I don't like the blue windows when I walk into a business either. I prefer a visible location where customers can voluntarily join a group or the green text that says something like "Welcome" and tells how to join the group if they would like.

Still being VERY inexperienced in SL business...how do you all feel about:

1. Using the Friends List to advertise a business
2. Unsolicited requests to join a group

ETA: I tend to be on the "less bold" side on both of these. I don't want to feel like I am putting someone on the spot, but maybe I should be a bit bolder where business is concerned.

Interested to hear your opinions and thank you in advance.

I discourage anyone from using a friend list for advertising. There are so many free-to-join ad groups for folks to spam. Also if you have friends that want your spam then set up a subscription Kiosk on your parcel (or your store or venue) and have them click it.

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thats the fastest way off mine..i couldn't tell you how many of my dancer friends i had to pull off because of dancer spam and events..
it's abusing the privilege of friendship is how i look at it..not sure if it is that extreme for everyone else..but when your friends list starts to pop like group notices itgets to be that way..

Hi Czari,

I have a similar dilemma. A friend sends a TP request every day which will take you to their club when some event is going on.

At one time I would have been upset, but today I just click no and move on. It's like spam to me. I don't get spam very often but when I do I just shrug my shoulders and click them away.

You can try and tell her if you'd like. That may resolve your situation.

That's exactly how I view it as well Ceka and this person was defriended and muted as soon as I got the second ad spam. But I know I tend to be a bit black and white about things so I wanted to get more experienced business owners' input.

*If* I had any interest in perhaps pursuing the friendship, I would have IM'd her to tell her to please stop including me in the spam, but the friends I *am* interested in don't do that to begin with.

I think we have the same friend. Like you, I just click decline and forget about it til the next day when I get another one. Thing is I rarely talk to this girl, at all.....I know her only through another friend. Her tp's always say 'Mass TP'.

Thank you for your input, Lias. I can imagine how that might get out of hand in clubs.

Hiya Bradley!

Ack..blind tp offers are the worst; however, as I mentioned in my post above, regarding any of these situations, the type of friendship I have with the person makes a difference on if I approach them about it or not.

I appreciate you posting

Re: the blind tp offers Bradley and Treasure (or anyone) - does the tp say where it's going? I used to get those from someone I just knew as a co-worker at a club and it would just say: "Come join me." This was a female and it was likely sent to her entire Friends List as well since my Partner would get the same tp offer, but I'm *definitely* not going to take a blind tp!!

The one I get, yeah, says the name of what I know to be her club, and that it is from her.

That would drive me insane! LOL

I have had similar situations where a newish friend decided to continue to send me TP's to their new club and it got to a point where I simply took them off my friends list. It was getting seriously out of hand, all the TP pop-ups from this one guy. To me, that's obnoxious.

I certainly would feel the same way about using the friends list to advertize. I have used my friends list to tell people about things......like a yard sale......or that I opened my new gallery......but that's one shot deal.....I sent a quick FYI, in case anyone is interested. And then I let it drop. To me that seems fair and acceptable.......but to send constant notices and ads.......bad joojoo.

I also don't like the group invites that come unannounced. It's one thing if a friend or aquaintance says, hey by the way I started this group, would you be interested.......great, then I can say yes or no. But the blue invites from people I haven't spoken to in eons.....or have just met.......that annoys me. I always decline. I'm not big on joining groups as it is.......and I'll make my own decisions, thank you.

i agree on all of the above...i hate it. i used to pare down my friends list to only those i actually talk to on a regular basis...but then i started having people get majorly offended and im me asking what they did, if i was mad at them etc. the main reason i pared down is tbh after a period of time i can look at my friends list and have not freakin clue who some of these people are....AND because it cut wayyyy down on the spam im's and tp's etc.

its funny you mention this czari because i just was thinking its time to pare down again due to these random spam msgs. people dont realize how mannnnnny ims and notecard and group notices i get when i log in and throughout the time im in sl because of vendor groups im in etc. but it gets reallllly tiresome to get all these extra ones too.

I have been known to send IMs about events at my place to friends - especially newer friends - who aren't in my group and may not know about my events. But I'm careful about this, and do it in a personal and sincere way. I don't spam my entire friends list every time I have an event, and I don't add people to my friends list with the intent of doing so.

My initial reaction to the OP was "ugh! what an awful abuse of a friends list! I'd delete anyone who did that to me." But when I thought it through I realized that my own practice could be construed as advertising to a friends list. So, I think the tone matter a lot. As long as the IM comes across as an invitation to a friend, not as an advertisement, and as long as it doesn't happen every single event and start to feel impersonal, I don't think it would offend me. If the person is really my friend, I'd like to know what they are up to in SL.

in your case madhu, i would not be offended...its the ones where i KNOW they are just spamming that annoy me.

At my old club i was head manager and i had 250 dancers working there not counting hosts and like 12 to 15 dj's and then greeters that were students learning to be dancers ..

first thing is to friend them as they start to work there.. lol

now i used to tell everyone to just use the group notices and don't IM people as they come in the door..chances are they are already in IM's anyways..

i didn't want the club to be a spam monster..so it wasn't so bad when i was working there..
i would get a few..but when i left and the new head manager took over..it was like a pinball machine on tilt..ding sing ding sing dsing ding ding ..

all of them using thier friends lists at the same time when events would start or they would get on stage or a new dj was on his shift...
it was just crazy..

so the second i see it going on nowdays..i just figure this person will be caught up in the club world and pretty much not give a hoot if i am on their list or not..so i drop them ..

i can handle to blue dropdowns for tp's..it's the freaking confrences that were driving me nuts..

I wouldn't mind one such IM from a friend every now and then.

After all, I do want to know what my friends are up to. If one has a new business, sure I want to hear about it.

Getting a lot of it, and getting the unsolicited TP offers, that I don't like. That's an easy way to drive people off a friends list.

When I tell my friends about whatever business or interesting thing I am doing, I prefer to do it with a personalized IM rather than en masse. A personal invitation feels a lot different than mass mailing.

Thank you all for the great input/opinions/experiences.



Same here. (And I love your new sig photo)

Hiya Jojo! I know you're always a busy gal. Oh yes, when I have no idea who someone is on my list, time to prune a bit. It's been too long since I've wandered over to your part of the world to say hi.

Madhu, I agree with Jojo in how you're using your Friends List for your cafe; whole different "feel and approach" to it. And I would prefer a more personalized IM as Amity suggested.

OHHH, Ceka!! That must have been crazy/wild! When I went out dancing more and was in just one or two DJ and/or club groups, just the multiple IM's, event notices and such for *one* event would drive me crazy!! And I know events aren't deliberately being timed this way, but it was uncanny how all those "ding-dings" would occur at the "worst" times.

I do not like either ploy.

There is someone on my friends list, who has from time to time sent an announcement about this or that shop or this or that business or something else I am supposed to come and do - things that might net them some benefit in the end. There is a fine line between friendly support and just being pimped for some person you met's cause or business.

On top of it the notes are accompanied by a plethora of !!!!! and such. I just have been too lazy to knock them off my list, or maybe they kinda skeer me. It skates justthisside of being obvious and therefore addressable.

I may tolerate it depending on the friend, the advertisement, if it repeats and how often, and other personal things.

I know someone from 2003 who sent a mass-IM conference and asked for 60k Linden. Yes my fingered hovered over that delete button in the friends list, but, he's been there in my friends list since the night of the land rush at Olive. If he made a habit of this, then i would conclude that my friendship with him was just a conduit for Linden begging and delete his card.

I have another friend from 2003 who is always sending out IM's requesting to know if you wish to join her on a tour, or at some discussion or a live performance, etc...I like that. I say no more than yes, but when I say yes, I am always happy with the outcome.

But in general, i would not like my friendship used like a business card for someone making cold calls to solicit for investors or initiate a sales pitch. That would be very bad. And besides, that is what the forums are for, public begging!

I don't worry about the group joins. I just decline them and forget about them just as quickly.

QFT


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I very much prefer the "less bold" approach in both cases.

#1 would be a quick way off my friends list. Maybe not the first time, and maybe not in all cases, but I wouldn't care for it much.

I've been trying to think of examples, and I guess what it comes down to is whether the person is soliciting business or asking friends for help. "Hey, our club is having an event in five minutes! Come on down!" would bug me more than, "No one showed up for our event and I'm stuck here for the next half hour - anyone want to keep me company?" especially if the first one was repeated to the entire friends list every time that person hosted an event. "New items for sale at my store!!!" would bug me; "I've just made something and could use an opinion on it if anyone's got a minute" not so much.

#2 doesn't bother me so much at clubs and events, but I prefer the "IM the host for a group invite" approach. I will sometimes even search the group and join it on my own - IF I'm not zapped with an invite while I'm still rezzing at the entrance. I see red when I teleport into an empty store and a group invite pops up the minute my feet touch the doormat. I understand there is one of the no-group group systems that will let the owner add someone without that person opting in and that really gets me riled.

we must go.

As with email, spam is something sent to all on the user's list; it's impersonal. There is no personal note even added in most cases.

A hand-typed note sent to one or a few people is not spam. However, even those could eventually be moved to the spam category if it's always self-serving somehow.

How about being invited to someone's personal group - those groups that are 'friends of' so and so? If the group ends up existing only to promote that person's jobs, shows, stores, live music gigs, etc. in Second Life?

I don't like to join those usually - I tried it and it ended up being nearly constant spam or blind TPs or open chats, and it was one-ended. In those cases it's a business, not a friendship, imo. (Of course it can be both, but not in the above example in my opinion)

Checking back in before I head off to bed...

Thank you all for your responses. I'm seeing a pretty general agreement on especially the Friends List issue, with the unsolicited group offers being a bit more mixed. Before the situations I cited in my first post, I had decided for my business to use an opt-in sign within my store for the group. It would *never* have entered my mind to use the Friends List. (Wow, I didn't know about the subscribe-type group that lets the owner add people )

Hi, Nic! Good to see you and thank you for your input. My opinions on how especially clubs handle these issues was shaped by the first club I ever went to and worked for. They used the "ask for an invitation" in clever ways that fit the theme of the club and when the club closed, it had a large group. Your comments coming from a club viewpoint are greatly appreciated.

(Hopefully I'm not rambling - it's 3:30 am and need to get some sleep, but wanted to thank you all for taking the time to post.)

bad form all around.

friends list != advertising venue
friends list != advertising venue for group joins (once I'd let slide).

anyone breaking this format gets deleted from my friends list.

If the IM or invitation is tailored to *me* specifically I don't mind. Hell, that's what friends are about!

On the other hand, if the same thing is sent to multiple recipients then it's time for the deletion button.

Pep ("What, you still have friends?" Actually, yes.)