Friendship requests

I find myself getting a lot of friendship requests from people I have never spoken to. I decline them all,but am I being rude? Is it normal to put someone you don't know on your friends list,just for the sake of adding them? Why don't they IM me first?

I Choose my friends carefully, so i Never accept friendship requests from people i have never even Met. No, I don't think you are being Rude. I think it rather Presumptuous for people to Spam friendship requests. I'm not sure why they do it, Perhaps it's in the Mistaken belief that it somehow grants them a Game Advantage.

Angel.

This happens to me once in a while in clubs... I'll usually accept just to be polite, but if a few days go by and that person STILL hasn't said a word to me, I remove them. Same goes for newbies that I meet or casual acquaintainces, but I give them a little more time if they spoke to me initially. But if someone is rude to start out and then offers friendship, I'll deny it with no qualms.

--Here's what I do--

I automaticly turn down a friend request from anyone I am not standing with "in person"

-Unless I know them already through the forums or extended IMs


In Person I automatically turn down any friend request by someone I barely know, or who I just met, unless its been a good or a long conversation

I assume if you start a conversation that its up to the other person to decide on if there should be a freinds request. I guess I kind of expect the courtesy returned.

Of people I do friend, if they are annoying I put myself on hide to them and put them in the "Unfriend que" after a week or two i quietly unfriend them.

Can the other person tell that you unfriended them?


I'm glad it's not just me. I don't understand the point of having people on your friends list,that are not even your "friends".

I usually accept all friend invitations so I won't hurt anyone's feelings. Later if we have never spoken I remove them. Other times I will IM them and ask them who they are, if I don't get a descent reply from them I decline their friendship and tell them why. *maybe later when we know each other better* that one never seems to happen.

I always ask in IM first if they would like to be friends before I offer it.

Certainly in Sims Online having more friends opened up more "interactions" and other benefits, so it may be that other games I haven't played have similar benefits so they think it'll do something here.

They don't get a message saying that you unfriended them, but if they check their list and see you are no longer there, then they might suspect... but then if they never spoke to you they probably don't remember who you are anyway.

Also, when adding a friend, a calling card goes into the calling card folder and does not get removed when you unfriend someone, as far as I know unless you manually remove it.

I usually decline friendship requests unless I have an interest to follow up. If I find myself in a situation in which I'd like to keep in touch with someone, yet I'm not ready to establish a friendship, then I offer them my card. You can do this by right-click on the other's AV, choose MORE and then GIVE CARD. That way they'll have a way to contact you and it won't crowd their friends list. You may request their card as well.

I generally don't accept from people I just meet unless we have spent some time interacting and find some common interest. I'll either politely decline for the time being leaving the possibility open, or offer a calling card for the time being. T

It's too bad more people don't use the calling card option. I love that thing.

Just accept then delete. Saves on a lot of drama.

Stupid bloody idea anyway.

SL needs a Miss Manners.

Gentle Avatar,

One should never press Friendship on an acquaintance too soon, or uninvited. After you have met someone, and you would like to continue the relationship, you may ASK them politely if you might add them to your Friends list. Or you may offer them your card.

One should never feel slighted if a Friendship offer is declined. Friendship gives a person considerable knowledge of their Friends' online status. Many very sociable avatars are reluctant to give a casual acquaintance this much knowledge of their online status.

If you wish to decline an offer of Friendship, but not give offense, you may decline, then offer your card as an alternative, should you and the other person wish to contact each other in the future.

Friendship incurs an obligation on both parties, both to stay in touch with an occasional IM, and also to not impose too greatly on the other person's time. There is a great deal to see and do in Second Life, and your Friends may not have time for you today, even if they still hold you in high regard.

Yeah I remember now, you and your freind left ME to deal with that Mosquito insta friend offerer guy.

It is too bad, indeed. But then, if people choose to hide their online status to people not on the friends list, it is no wonder people go straight to the friend offer.

I think that some of it may be related to the business(es) that a person runs. They may have a pressing question to ask and will want to know when you are online. IMO, there is nothing really so pressing that can't wait, but I imagine that that is one of the reasons for the friendship offer.

Mister?
-Bone?
Rex?

Typo. I have no idea how that got there.

I am sure this is not the case in every instance, but I love reading profiles. Every now and then, especially when I was very new to SL, I would open someone's pie menu to open their profile and find I had offered them friendship instead. (I generally IMed with an apology and an explanation as soon as I realized what I've done, and most people were quite gracious about it. The dude who firebombed me before I could get the apology out... not so much.)

I refuse random requests from people who've never talked to me, generally either with no comment or a lighthearted "But I hardly know you..."

That's OK, the first time I met my best SL friend, she had active Xcite parts on and I unknowingly clicked somewhere...interesting. I was mortified and TP'd away. lol

The first time I met my best SL friend, she was designing new lingerie for Valentine's Day and asked me to zoom in on her crotch to make sure the panties were lined up correctly. Needless to say, I was a little weirded out, but now we go out and take the lingerie competitions by storm hehe.

OMG! Did you touch her in the Welcome Area? <nudge nudge wink wink>

I decline the friendship requests that I get from people that I have never met and don't know. Simply because I'm in a room with you and 20 other people doesns't mean that I automatically want to be or should be your friend.

Same thing w/group invites. Get those too from people that I've never heard of. GOt one the other day when I logged on from someone for a fantasy combat group. I declione those also.

lol, we knew each other vaguely from another forum and I went looking for her on a sim she'd mentioned in a post. Little did I know that it was sex-themed...

But, yes, it was HER Welcome Area.

Hee! Well done. You ought start a blog!

I seem to get a fair number of "out of the blue" friendship requests. I mean to say, I will go somewhere with group of friends and people I haven't even been introduced to will offer friendship. Have no idea why, it hardly can be what passes for my sparkling wit.

But in any event, a simple "I'm sorry, I try to keep my friendslist short" seems to suffice for most. And anyone so rude as to press for friendship after that is hardly someone you would want on that list.

If it's just a request without uttering a single word - sorry, no-go because I consider that kinda rude. I actually had people who offered friendship again and even a third time and not talking to me once, which pops up the question - why do they want to be my friend anyway?

Also, I'm nice and easygoing, but I've come to detest the IMs that just start out with "hello" and then minutes of nothing. I've started to answer that with a cautious "yeeessss?", and often enough, I get the friendship request directly after that.

I don't think it's rude to decline this sort of request. It's rather about personal space. It's like some guy meeting you on a train and in his very first sentence asking you where you live.

I'd like to at least wait if I have anything to say to the people I meet.