Harrassment/stalking/ARs?

Not worth it.

Sorry to hear you are going through this. You simply *must* keep ARing every single incident :/

Linden cannot work without proof. Harassment is harassment, whatever form it takes.

Hoping for a reply or resolution from an Abuse Report is pretty ...erm hopeless. I haven't had a 'resolved' reply to an AR for six months, and I don't AR lightly.
You might want to try Live Help.
Do you have records of what this person has been saying to you or your family members, as that might help. It be worth un-muting and logging your IMs for a while to get evidence. You can set this in preferences.

Good luck

You have used the tools at your disposal; the best thing to do would be to ignore it.

If I read you correctly, his best efforts now consist of sending you unwanted, declinable goods, and previously was sending money. I don't mean to make light of how you feel, but at this point, it seems as if you are granting him the power to make you miserable. You give that power everytime you get an unwanted delivery and get irritated. You do have the choice to not get so irked.

The Lindens move in mysterious ways, and it is a problem that they don't give feedback. I can imagine them looking at the complaint and find it lacks merit - but not telling you that. I can also imagine the AR queue being very long. I'm not saying this is how it should be, but it is.

It is a little bit late now, but people who harrass typically find it boring when they get no response. If the person sending you gifts is reading this, you've likely given him more satisfaction than you intended.

Good luck, but you've pretty much done what you can.

Omg that's terrible. I hope for you it stops fast. Had my self an experience like that, and like you, it really toke the fun out of SL. For what the AR, don't know exactly how long it's gonna take Linden for taking some action but when I start griefing back the b***h there was an AR in my mailbox a few hours later.
Good luck with it.

I agree that as long as he thinks/knows he's upsetting you, the longer this will go on. It's best to just ignore, decline anything that's sent to you, and as hard as it might be...do not respond to anything. When he realizes he's not going to get what he wants...which is to make your SL life miserable....he'll go away. Best advice is to decline and ignore. Don't let this guy ruin your SL. Good luck

There are options outside of sl.
Google Cyber Stalking.
Many groups are getting on the ball and working towards holding people just as accountable in the internet as they would be out in the real world.
Good luck

Make an alt, make her more beautiful than you, strike up some interesting conversation with this guy, make friends, with him, have lots of cyber-sex, partner up with him, have him give your alt gifts and money and profess in his profile all his unending love for your alt, find out his friends in SL, sleep with them, take pics, then send them to him and break up.

See why didn't I do that instead of just being too nice and then losing my temper one day?

Wow, the 1L thing Ive seen before. Is this guy a creepy looking 20 something wanna be rocker looking white brittish guy IRL and a Wanna be pretty Emo guy in SL?

That writes a lot of emo sounding "poetry" in his Picks?

I think I'm going to make and alt to start stalking Bree... my friends will be very thankful.

/me grins

Just a few random thoughts.

AR's are enforced more quickly if they are submitted by multiple avatars at the same time. So have everybody you know AR the guy at the time he offences, with as much evidence as possible. This tends to work for the typical griefer stuff better than a single AR (too many of those probably get submitted).

If its the same avatar doing it, hold him accountable. Speak with his friends, groups, landlords and give them all transcripts of what is going on. He'll eventually jump to alts if he hasn't already, but if he is too deeply connected with his current avatar this may be enough. This worked for a female friend of mine who got into a situation with a guy she dated on SL.

If you were friends with him long enough to have an RL email, warn him, then send notices to his ISP or email provider with accounts of the abuses. Having his email account or ISP priviledges threatened or revoked is a real hassle.

You can hire griefers in world to track him and shut him down, modded clients are so full of holes they can cause him some real issues (crashing his client, abusing his avatar, possibly even breaching his privacy). There are many asshats in SL, might as well point them at somebody who deserves it. (plus log everything they say they did, and submit it to LL afer ).

Hmmm why am I seeing locked thread? Seriously, Shadow, that shouldn't have been posted up here.

QFT, and Mal's right, the Lindens get 2000-3000 AR complaints a DAY (at least that's what Chip Midnight says, and he's smarter than me) so if you've only sent 3 on this guy and it's been going on for weeks or months, the Lindens might assume that your problem resolved itself.

I've generally gotten pretty good responses on my AR's (all 2 of them) but they were just littering problems, as opposed to actual harrassment. Took about a week to get back an email that the AR was resolved.

I agree, the fight fire with fire approach often leads to ecalation.

The best approach is sit down and try to have an adult conversation with the unrealisitc would be suitor. Tell him your opinion of him declines with every stunt he pulls and hes long since destroyed any chance that youd try dating him again.

You're thinking in terms of rational behaviour Colette. If he was rational he'd not act like this ...

Ive seen stuff like this before. It basically stops when the persons been ignored long enough, or realizes they have no chance in hell of a relationship.

If the adult conversation hasnt been attempted yet - And most often online it never is tried - than its possible he will actually "get it."

We already see how he responds to being ignored. Tries to talk louder.

My guess is he thinks he can sweet talk her into dating him.

"So you're saying there's a chance..."

Ignore the loser. It'll take a while but it works.

Well I agree .. but .. Just going by all the relationships online Ive seen the "breakup" is usually almsot a footnote.

The long drag out fight from RL doesnt really happen. Neither does the rational agreement to move on. Nor the "Im sorry but its over" in SL person take place.

Basically often times the person just stops talking to the person they were dating. If lucky theres a very short "Dear John" offline message.

Makes someone feel pretty marginal. And many respond by over reacting to being ignored/slighted in a way to "force" the person to listen.

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Of course if the Relationaship was formally ended and the person is still like this .. Or if there never was a relationship .. Thats different


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Ignoring them works in all cases eventually. But if you dont bother to respect them enough to break up with them first, its partly your fault if the response is a bit deranged.

I just read the OP again, and Katie's profile here says "SL Kid" and she makes mention of her family.

Is this person harassing because he hates child avatars?

Or, more creepily, since he is sending her gifts, and money, is he more interested in something far worse? If THIS is the case, I would call LL on the phone and not hang up until they understand that this guy is a potential pedophile and needs to be checked out IMMEDIATELY.

Just one girl's opinion.

I'm sorry yer still havin' to deal with dat, Katie. He really needs to get himself a life, no pun intended.

Yes, keep ARing the guy. You may also wish to stop in at Linden office hours, too. It *might* help, though no guarantees, of course. I'd also push at the support phone line.



It is a third option from the above, but I tink it'd be up to Katie to discuss it if she wishes to.

Mari

Of course! Katie's privacy is her own. I was just saying that IF this guy is truly creepy, then LL should be notified immediately. That's all.

Go to Linden Village during somebody's office hours.

Schedule: http://tinyurl.com/2x683b

Make sure ARs are as short as possible and get to the point quickly.

Any activity which occurs through an external website (ie. through SL Exchange) will not be investigated so I'd probably only mention that after you've got a Linden's attention; if only to keep the AR short.

If other people are being treated similarly, make sure they also file an AR against them under the same category. Don't get uninvolved parties ARing this individual (in the hope of faster resolution) because that could backfire on you.

Good luck!

It's just an interpersonal control thing, not anything that is being brought up. Yes, I'm a child avie, but that doesn't come into it. Other than it probably bothers me more because my whole point in SL is to experience innocence and simplicity and avoid the adult world.

I just want it to end and checking my email, I've AR'd four times since 9/11 and was wondering whether my ARs were going into the void, am I being too impatient, or is this type of stalking discounted as harmless by the libertarian oriented Lindens.

A big start would be if you ever get any acknowledgement that the issue has been investigated other than the automated message that it was received? If they decide this is spiffy behavior and I'm being ignored, would I get any message back? If I'm wasting my time I'd just as soon quit now rather than continue to waste my time.

Even after they investigate it, you will probably never know what they did. You will get a spiffy email saying " We looked into this. We may or may not have taken action. "

And they do take forever and a day to respond. I had one AR in which a resident was attempting to extort money from me, making threats to disrupt my club if I didn't pay. I received a reply 4 months later.

If you enjoy it here it may be time to consider a alt, if the jerk doesn't leave you alone.