A Bit of Compassionate Advice Please

Agreed. You just don't know. There are endless scenarios to why this person acted this way and has not returned to SL. The thing to remember is that there are indeed very real people with very real lives behind the avatar.

For instance...

What if the real person behind the avatar got a really bad diagnosis from a doctor. Said person might just be mentally devastated....or of course there are a multitude of other things that could happen to make a person just not care anymore. You can't just automatically think him a jerk, even though he very well could be. Nonetheless, at this point there is nothing you can do about it. No response is all you're getting. It's not a bad thing to send his stuff back. If he comes back, then you'll know. )

OH, yezzz...

I don't think it's a case of "you don't know who the person truly is". More a case of people can change to fit their circumstances, or the circumstances change them, either for better or worse.

I think I am a better person in SL than I am in RL. Certainly a different one, though both of them are still "me". Or aspects of me. If you met me in RL, you'd form one opinion of me. If you meet me in SL, you'll form another. Which is the "real" me?

But this is getting way off topic (big surprise there, Ms. Thread Derailment 2007).

I say ban the avatar, keep the prims, and rent them out to Trout, who is STILL (as far as I know) homeless after over a year in world. CX already has a nice place.

Trout is homeless!
OMG FaTeke Wottitz faints

I still have some extra prims if you don't mind living on a GLBTI sim!

FaTeke

What does the I stand for? That's new to me.

I am truly blessed now they are ganging up on me. "The Trout" and Lindal what did I do??

"CX"

/me looks around, puzzled.

I don't see a gang. I don't even see The Trout. Just me...

I'm not whacking on you, CX...I just think that if there's a home to be had out of this, The Trout ought to get preference, seeing as how you already have that very lovely skybox.

I actually thought about rezzing a cardboard box for him behind the Lebettu shops at one point (he once told me he "lived in a cardboard box at the Morris welcome area", and I thought it would give him a sense of homey familiarity). But it wouldn't provide a place to put his biplane or his motorcycle, so I gave up on that idea.

That, and the merchants vetoed it. They thought having The Trout pop out of his box at random moments might have a negative effect on customer traffic.

I'm not ganging up on anyone! Lindal's merchants are ganging up on me. I'm innocent. And I have a home. I live in a purple plastic lawnchair at the Hanson Infohub. At least for now. They might be evicting me for bringing down the average IQ at the hub.

In all seriousness, I might be going premium and getting a little 1024 to play with, but I don't want any sort of serious home. I'd be happy to give you a rating FaTeke, but I do those for free, so don't worry about the prims.

Yes

No

Yes

No


A month is plent sufficient. Write him off n' go on tith your life.

Yes

No


A month is plent sufficient. Write him off n' go on with your life.

Oy vey... Are the forums as borken as SL now? What's with the triple post?

I wish you the bestest with it, sincerely.

I was in SL though family caregiving, terminal diagnosis, hospice, death, another sudden family death, had friends missing for rl illnesses, had my computer breakdown where I missed a wedding in sl and my own sl birthday party where I could not even communicate with my partner.

Through it all, my SL friends and family supported me, sometimes simply by not doing anything at all...and simply waiting...so I always do the same for them.

Good luck FaTeke, you are a good friend to yours, imho.

G- Gay
L- Lesbian
B- Bisexual
T- Transgender / sexual
I- Intersexed

At least thats my guess.

return all of his stuff and if he asks one day why and you still care then blame it on a system roll back..

Or perhaps a much HIGHER divorce rate.

Perhaps it might help to look at it from some kind of business view... if he had rented a home in first place, then stayed away for so long without checking back (aka paying rent), all his belongings would have been returned to him by now to make room for a new tenant.

I have a feeling I'm going to regret this, but what is intersexed?

Maybe he's an alt ...

In any case (and this is from someone who has been too nice in the past and paid for it), the welfare and happiness of only one person really is your responsibility and that's you. So send it back.

I have the opposite issue, someone who supposedly cared a lot for me (yeah right) whom I let keep hold of some furniture actually left SL. Came back of course - still didn't have the manners to return the furniture I left with her.

Bottom line is that your super nice new friend has probably leeched their way into someone's affections as an alt and popped back on to grab stuff, transfer funds etc. Send it back and if they dare to say anything take it with a pinch of salt.

Better to be thought of as a scumbag and hold your head high than be treated like a scumbag for fear of being thought of badly.

***edit As was said earlier there's some people whom you should wait for. They tend to actually communicate in a way that lets you know there's something amiss rather than like this guy has done to you. I had a friend who would disappear for ages then come back, and I'd always worry I'd never see him again. After the last time I spoke to him, if I had anything of his I'd be keeping it. As it is, he told me that he loved me and then he logged off and I am fairly sure that I will never see the name light up again. I'll keep him on my friends list forever.

Hermaphrodite. Like me.

Come on guys.. lighten up.. Two of my favorite people in all of SL and I am pulling your chains.

I have a spare room at my place, Trout you are welcome to hang your hat there. If you are having a visitor leave a sock on the door knob and I'll go away. LOL

"CX"

Sorry to Hi Jack the Thread...

Unless you need the prims or it's unsightly, just leave it for say 6 months before returning, heck you might even move land between now and then saving a lot of awkwardness.

The notion of CX and Trout as roommates somehow reminds me of "The Odd Couple"...

Maybe you should join us...

Ah nevermind. I am not good at sharing. "CX"

I chime in to say that I see no harm in returning his stuff and taking the box down. If he comes back, you can explain to him that you did not hear from him. It really is not a big deal to take it down. I think that you are better off anyway because then if he does come back, you will have the opportunity to give him your 2 cents.

I agree with this.. I have someone like this and I will never remove them from my list as long as I am in SL. Thankfully they are back full time but there was a RL issue that kept them from being able to log in as they once had...and since then we have discussed the possibility of something like this arising in the future and what to expect.

Our communication has never been strained nor short and sweet as was the case with the OP's friend the last time they spoke..so that does add a little different twist to the original situation here. I just wanted to add that at first I thought the worst.. abandonment of the friendship, sickness, death, etc.. and I guess that's hard not to think when you are close to someone. But there are also other reasons that could keep them away that might be out of their control such as computer problems, IRL problems, etc.

Do whatever feels comfortable for you, if your heart says to keep their things a little longer, then that is what you should do.. if you feel like returning things.. you should do so guilt free because if they were your friend they will totally understand the need to do so when they return. Good luck which ever path you choose.