muting friends

Sorry if this is a silly question, but I cannot find the answer in either the knowledge base or using search.

If a friend were to mute me, would I be aware, other than not getting any response? ie, could I still engage an IM even if it didnt display any dialogue from my friend's end? Or should I be able to detect that from MY mute list ...

If I cannot see it, and it has happened by accident (ie wrong person), is there any way I can contact my friend to ask them to clear the mute, other than via a third party ...

I see them online, but they are not responding to my IM's ...

Yep, that's what muting looks like

As I understand it you do not know if someone has muted you.

No


Yes


No


Not really, unless you see them in-world and put a sign on a prim or something. Or, if you have an alt, IM them from it.

Correct.

Although I included the accidental issue in my OP, I do not believe this is the case. The replies so far indicate something disturbing, and may lead to removal of a friend, something which understandably can be upsetting. When I get inworld (currently at work) I will try and send an IM to a common friend, using the offline system, to ask for clarification before I act.

Thank you for your speedy replies !


SL drama, who needs it hee hee.

i'm not sure why you'd be muted, but kept on the friends list. does your "friend" show up on your friends list?

*sings the muted song*
iii don't liiike you, but iii luuuve you, I don't wannnt you, but iiii neeed youu

*Mute*

I presume my friend didnt want to listen to me at the time, but I interpret muting as rather forceful behaviour, certainly not something I would expect of friends. I can only guess that they didnt want to remove me from their list, as that is essentially a final action. whereas the mute is controllable, and not visible except by deduction ... ? It is not possible to give details, as they involve the specifics of the dynamics between us. I can see my friend, and also when they come online ... unless they have subsequently editted that feature too ...

lol @ Foehn ...

I've occassionally muted friends intentionally, when their scripted stuff is making too much noise, or whatever. I ususally switch on "see muted text" and make sure to unmute when they're done.

If they use the current version of the client (1.19.1.4) or any variant on that (Cool SL, Restrained Life, Nicholaz) then there's an item in my shop that will allow you to communicate with them, through the mute, face to face.

However.. the current "Release Candidate" (Beta Client) will show you as a grey shadow-person, with no attachments. In which case you'd have to rez the tool on the ground, rather than wear it.

But let's talk about muting for a minute. There *IS* a way to tell if you're muted. When your friend is online, send them something. A notecard perhaps. If they "instantly refuse" then yes, it's a mute. Instant refusal is REALLY obvious, it's like the second you "let go", you'll see it.

If you're really really muted, then you might want to use a messenger. Ask another friend to talk to them, and ask them what the mute is about. Maybe it was an accident. (those "mute" buttons on inventory offers are way too easy to press, and new users ttreat them like they're "ignore future offers of this item" which is not what that button does).

But it could also be an action of "Restrained Life".. if your friend is into bondage games.. if they're wearing a "gag" or something, they may not be ABLE to IM you, or to send you a notecard.. and they may not be able to read your IMs.

Anyways, here's a link to the mute tool in my shop.
http://uncensored.slexchange.com/modules.php?name=Marketplace&file=item&ItemID=595078

But personally, I'd go with asking a friend to help you, first.

I believe the muting was intentional. It is possible that my friend was engaged in activities which made communication awkward but I also sent a message later, stating they hadnt replied, and they still didnt reply. I have already messaged another friend to assist, if they desist, then I will have all the answers I need !

Update for those interested ...

Last night, this issue occupied a significant portion of my time inworld ...

I dropped a notecard using the friend's profile - no immediate alert messages came up, so I guess that mute is not currently activated ... although it could have been disabled. However, I did not receive any accept or decline messages either. I used the persons own notecard, perhaps this does not work?

I also contacted a common friend, who I would have expected to be aware of the issue and throw light up on it - they knew nothing of what has happened.

I may try writing a notecard asking my friend bluntly why still no response ... although they will be well aware of my position now, from the common friend.

Or I could just 'delete friend' ...

Your notecards won't get to the friend either if they've muted you. I don't know if you get an inventory rejected notice or not, but your friend wouldn't even know you tried to give them something.

Yes. I was trying the notecard to see if the rejected notice would flag up ... since this was the focus of the OP.

This does not sound remotely like a real friend.Perhaps try a 4 legged friend,a 4 four legged friend,they never let you down.

This is the concensus amongst my inworld real friends ... I am just summoning the strength to press that DELETE button ...

I had a friend mute me once by accident.

I was thinking all sorts of horrid awful thoughts about her until I got a friend to pass the information to her. She really hadn't intended to do it, and was very contrite.

So...give it a chance before you delete your friend.

you know hon, it might be all less sinister than you are thinking.

if they logged off, and their avatar is ghosted, it will appear to be online by all accounts. can you actually TP to this person's location and see them?

Did you try to give them a 'notecard' or their own 'calling card'? I do not know if you can give calling cards. If you did try passing them a calling card, try an actual notecard.

You know, the friend just might be busy with something particular that's taking up their time, or feeling down in rl about some problem and not wanting to talk, or the SL friends list is playing up... There could be lots of answers without it meaning they've blanked you deliberately.

If you've still not had a reply, why not let things go a few days and then try again and see what happens? If they haven't deleted you off their list it must mean they still consider you someone they want to stay in contact with.

--
Aes

LOLLLLLL Hey I know that song!

I have decided to leave well alone for four weeks, and then review. As another friend commented to me, leaving them in my friends register is doing no harm ... they are aware of my concern so any action is down to them.

The best bet is to ask a mutual friend to intercede and find out, if you have one. It does happen by accident.

Hon, if you didn't receive an accept or decline message that means your friend was not at the keyboard. I know someone who would go off to work and leave her avatar on SL by mistake. I've used an anti-idler and forgot to go into busy mode while AFK and had people IM me. It's probably very innocent and you're spending way too much energy on worrying about it.

I'm at the point of muting my entire "friends" list...no better still....just defriend 'em all

Is it correct that if you mute an object, you also mute the owner of that object?

If so, is this something that may have happened in this case?