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Top 5 Tips for the Newly Born

Looli Vella
( ~^_^)~
Join date: 9 Feb 2007
Posts: 148
03-13-2007 00:14
As a newcomer to SL, I am wondering what long-time residents think should be the newbie Top 5. What is the one object every new resident should have? (Is it a brownish pink 14 inch prim penis?) The one gesture guaranteed to grease the wheels? (Is there a nose picking animation?) Or, what five rules of SL etiquette should every newbie know? What do you wish you had figured out sooner?
Raymond Figtree
Gone, avi, gone
Join date: 17 May 2006
Posts: 6,256
Great topic
03-13-2007 00:27
My top five things I learned the hard way:

1) Don't rush into any decision. Does not matter if it's shoes, a sim, a house or your hair, compare before you commit.

2) Performance counts. There's not much use in having an inventory of kick-ass shit if you are constantly crashing or can't cross a sim border.

3A) Make a friend. Meet someone who has been around the block and have them take you to the best stores and coolest sims.

3b) Make a home for yourself. Find a nice sim and settle down. There's no point in having stuff if you can't rez it anywhere. Plus, a little privacy and a landmark to call home are priceless.

4) Don't give up. If you think there is no point, or nothing to do in SL, it's not SL, it's you.

5) This is the most important one: There are real people with real feelings behind those avatars. Be as kind and as honest as you can.
Read or listen to some Eckhart Tolle. You won't regret it.
Coyote Momiji
Pintsized Plutonium
Join date: 13 Aug 2006
Posts: 715
03-13-2007 00:28

1) Do not forget that there is a person on the other end of your interaction. There are very very few NPCs in SL, unlike WoW, and the vast majority of them don't interact like a person. They might not speak English, and they might not respond as immediately as you like - but they are people, and thus, your peers. They also do not drop phat lewtz - do not shoot them.

2) Your mere presence in the world is not carte blanche to receive anything. There are a number of freebies in the world, some of which are of very high quality. Don't ask a vendor to give you a freebie "because you want it".

3) Orientation Island, Ivory Tower and Jopsy's Particle Lab are your friends. Learn what you can from established sources, and if you ask someone who isn't involved in an educational venture for lessons, don't throw a fit because they say no.

4) You may be here to cyber everything that moves, but everything that moves isn't here to cyber you. Just because a man or woman or small fuzzy object looks "hawt" does not mean they are on the pull. Likewise, there is no burden on you to do anything you don't consent to. (Also neatly summed up as "for the love of (whatever), put that prim dick away!";)

5) There is no easy way to get money in SL. Attempting to go the easy route will get you mocked, banned, spoken down to, or thrown off the grid entirely. Learn a skill. Learn several skills. Do NOT tell someone that they should give you a full-permissions version of their best-selling product because you want to sell it. Also don't threaten to prim-mirror or texture-intercept their products. That makes people unfriendly.

Argus Collingwood
Totally Tintable
Join date: 5 Dec 2005
Posts: 600
Top Tips
03-13-2007 00:38
Welcome and here's a couple of lists developed to help;-)

Robin Lobo's List:

NanoGunk TOP TEN TIPS ...

1. Buttgrab
To look and move around in tight places: Left click & hold your own butt - move your mouse around - wow! you can look up & down and steer yourself when using the movement keys (arrows or W A D S)

2. Mouselook
Do you have a scroll wheel on your mouse? if so; scroll toward yourself and the camera will zoom in all the way to mouselook - do this when flying and you can hold the forward button (up key or W) and then just point where you want to go with the mouse.

3. Profile Breadcrumbs
Right click on other people and read their profile (right click on the person >> choose profile), - look in their "Picks" tab. By clicking on their picks you can choose "teleport" to that location. Check those places out - when you get there, look at others peoples picks and check those out too - you can bounce all over the world this way.

4. Profile Notes
When you meet someone interesting you can type notes into their profile "My Notes" tab, now the next time you meet them you can see the notes you made earlier. I usually make notes like: Met on <date> at <place> is into <blah>, is from <place> <timezone> .. and other facts ... etc etc. You will meet a LOT of people and this is an easy way to keep organized :)

5. My Profile Notes
Bring up your own profile (right click yourself), then use the "My Notes" tab like sticky notes. Only you can see these notes so you can enter things to do, things to remember and so on. This is incredibly handy. Don't forget you can also edit your own profile ... :)

6. Inventory
Did you know you can have more than one inventory window open? Inventory: File >> New Window. Why? because you can drag & drop between the two - this is the smart way to organize your inventory! Drag & Drop whole folders. You did make "Cool stuff", "Free stuff" and "Crap" folders already, didn't you? lol
After doing shopping try to organize the new items/folders right away, your inventory will grow and grow and grow!!!

7. Inventory: Recent Items tab
This tab shows new items since log-in - but click Filters and change the "Days Ago" - presto you can see that item you got 4 days ago!!! combine this with tip 6 - drag & drop from a filtered window to another inventory window. Sweet!

8. Mini-Map
This is something that should always be on your screen - drag it to the top right corner, size it pretty small.
Why? Shows people around you as green dots - or - a green T means the person is above you, an inverted T means they are below you! Right click to select zoom. Left click it to open the big map!

9. Big Map
See the world! use zoom slider here - also left click - hold and drag the map around. Where is everybody? look for clusters of green dots :) Pausing the pointer over places will give you a tiny pop up with the sim name and how many people are there. Double click a spot and you'll teleport there! (to make the map less busy, uncheck things you're not interested in like Infohub, Telehub etc). You can type in a height too (the 3rd box) before clicking teleport, if you want to pop in high -quietly.

10. Friends
Don't offer friendship just to be friendly!
A "friend" is notified when you log-in, log-off and they can see where you are using the map, snoop, teleport to you (or close by!) - anywhere, anytime! - Friends should be real friends.
The proper etiquette is to offer your Calling Card - right click the Person >> More >> Give Card ..

Happy SL'ing
Robin Lobo

Argus List:

Argus Tips

1: Always push the chat button [lower left second] and then expand it by pressing the history button to see what people around you are saying.

2: Always move the IM chat screen up to the top of your screen [I use upper right] by grabbing it with a left mouse and dragging it to where you want it. This is a private chat window that only you and the person you are speaking with can see.

3: When playing games with a host, it is customary to tip them. Ask them where their tip jar is located. Also check for the Rules, they will list if putting money back into the next game is customary for the winner. Don't be afraid to ask the host or other players questions.

4: The friends buttom [third from left bottom buttons] can tell you who is online and offers options for contacting them. If you give your friend the ability to "see" you one the map, it helps you both keep in touch. Do this by checking the second box on the menu [can see me on the map].

5: Use the big map button. It helps you get an idea of where you are and where your friends might be.

6: If you run into trouble, sit down. Don't panic. Or you can tp "home" where it is safe by using the Ctrl-Shift-H command or under World [top menu] taking the Teleport home option.

7: Have fun!! Explore, buy, dance

8: If you are not seeing Music or Movie control buttons go to Edit [top menu] and choose preferences [bottom option] and then when the pop-up appears in the middle of your screen, take the tab marked Audio & Video and make sure that boxes for streaming are both checked. If they are checked and you don't hear or see the video [activate by pressing the arrow key] then you might need to upgrade or download the newest version of Quicktime . Here's the link: the free one should work fine.


Pick the non-iTunes version.

9: There are some money making schemes in SL that are not very legit. Be aware that if it sounds too good to be true, it mostly is..hehe

10: Read Read Read... the F1 key brings up a quick cheat-sheet. In addition please read and heed:

Cya in-game soon!!
Suzi Sohmers
Registered User
Join date: 4 Oct 2006
Posts: 292
03-13-2007 02:40
Great set of responses. Just one more. When chatting to someone, use their name. If you just say "Hi, how are you today?" no one will know who you are talking to. Oh, and never, NEVER start a conversation with "Hi babe, wanna f.....".
Beebo Brink
Uppity Alt
Join date: 12 Jan 2007
Posts: 574
03-13-2007 04:18
1) Wear clothes.

This last Sunday I walked into a animations store and saw a naked noob with a hard-on who had put clothes lower on his shopping list than skin and anims.

2) Don't abuse older residents who try to clue you in on local norms

See above. When I commented that Mature areas didn't necessarily mean public nudity, he called me a "homophobe." (Say huh?)

Annabelle Vandeverre
Heading back to Real Life
Join date: 30 Nov 2006
Posts: 609
03-13-2007 04:36
The one thing that every new resident should get - a flight feather! SL is more fun when you can fly really high and don't have to worry about crashing into banlines.
I am returning to my real life for personal reasons this summer. My store, $50 or less @ Annabelle's Garden and Home Decor, is now closed. Thank you to my customers for making my store successful in the short time I've been here. Get this before the bots do: http://slurl.com/secondlife/Nefrax/153/156/40
Lostmedia Ares
Drinking tea
Join date: 6 Sep 2006
Posts: 290
03-13-2007 05:13
I would like to give a load of tip's here but to be honest im realy pushed for time atm :( so i will give the first few tip's i recived wene i first started my SL life

1 , You can change the whole look and mood of the sim you are in by changing the light setting .... yes .. you can control the day and night herE ... You are GOD Mhuahaha :)

Cilck on World on the top of your screen ... Scroll down to " Force Sun " and set it to Midnight ... BOOM it's dark :) .. repeat steps and also choose from sunrise , sunset and noon .
That will fix the Day/ night feeling and mood on a sim .

2 , Not all Girl avatar's are realy girl's in RL :) ..... and not all Boy avatar's are realy boy's .

This tip may save you some very embaressing moment's at a later date .. be warned eheh .

3 , Have fun ... this is a simulated world .. try and be yourself ... but allso try things that you have allways wanted to do in RL but was afraid to take the first step... Like Sky diving maybe WHAAAHAHHHHEEEEEEE !

4 , Be nice to others , You will make a lot of friends ... you well be helped more and quicker ... You will learn faster .... you will enjoy SL far more if you be a nice person .

5, Try and learn a skill ... comming to SL for a nice little chat and dancing with friends is awesome and can be all that some people ever need to do ... But by learning a skill .. ie building ... you may go on to be able to cover any cost's of a full membership ( If you have one ) or better still earn a few L$ to buy some new clothing or little bit's and bob's that you see knocking around in the stores .. Who knows ... you could go on to make a pile of reallife cash and all you did was learn how to build :)

6 , Avoid Drama ... hard ... but can be done

OMG I HAVE TO GO I'M LATE ahah .. have fun
Desmond Shang
Guvnah of Caledon
Join date: 14 Mar 2005
Posts: 5,250
03-13-2007 06:05
1) Meet some people. Otherwise the grid is pointless and you feel like a homeless person. Best way to do this is kinda hang out other new people while you learn to use things. NCI, The Shelter, and *cough* even some themed areas I know of are very welcoming to new people. :)

2) Post on the forumz. Omg, I know that name! Suddenly you know fifty people and without really too much sorting you get a sense of who you could likely say hi to if you needed a quick tip.

3) Get the free stuff. Yadni's junkyard, or search 'freebie'. Tons out there, and you'll be able to get by well enough.

4) Don't spend any money your first month. If you get hooked you will be spending tons soon enough. Most who stay fall in love with the grid, spend tons, then 'crash' and withdraw before they stabilise. Save yourself the rollercoaster ride.

5) Find the most obscure sandbox possible (search or ask around) and learn to rez a few prims, upload a texture if you have $L 10 on you, and play like a kid with a new toy for a while.

Steampunk Victorian, Well-Mannered Caledon!
Egil Milner
Registered User
Join date: 5 Jan 2007
Posts: 103
03-13-2007 06:08
1. Just because someone hands you something doesn't mean you have to take it.

2. Begging for money is shameful.

3. Search is your best friend.

4. Not everyone thinks so, but I think that running a simple AO and different stand/walk animations goes just as far in removing the newbie "sheen" as new shapes, skins, clothes, and hair.

5. Build as soon as you can. Take a free class, find a good sandbox (I'm partial to Skybeam), and experiment. Get plenty of textures.
Zaphod Kotobide
Join date: 19 Oct 2006
Posts: 2,087
03-13-2007 06:19
This thread could evolve into something that can be included in the Orientation Islands. Hopefully a Linden keeps an eye on it..
bilbo99 Emu
Garrett's No.1 fan
Join date: 27 Oct 2006
Posts: 3,468
03-13-2007 06:34
From: Zaphod Kotobide
This thread could evolve into something that can be included in the Orientation Islands. Hopefully a Linden keeps an eye on it..

Quite a few threads do this Zaphod (another Doug Adams fan yeayy!)
Shame so many valuable insights disappear into the archives. Yes, I know within weeks someone starts it all off again but sadly some really valuable opinions of posters who drift away are lost :(
Paulo Dielli
Symfurny Furniture
Join date: 19 Jan 2007
Posts: 780
03-13-2007 06:46
Prims prims prims....

When you start making stuff (in a sandbox or whereever) get yourself used to using as few prims as possible, but concentrate on textures. Starting out like this will give you a healthy view on making and buying things.
Fenix Eldritch
Mostly harmless
Join date: 30 Jan 2005
Posts: 201
03-13-2007 06:46
I’ve been here two years and never knew about the “Butt grab” move. Ya learn something new every day.

All good points listed so far. A few additions here, mine focus on etiquette. Though I think we’ll wind up having a top 50 instead of 5. :)

1) Realize that Second Life is not a sprawling combat zone. Don’t go around attacking, pushing or caging everyone in sight. There are designated places for that.

2) It is YOUR responsibility to keep yourself entertained, not SL’s. If you can’t find any activities that interest you, go out and make them! Share it with the rest of SL and enrich the grid further!

3) Treat others as you would want to be treated. This coincides with #1, don’t enter this world to be a disruptive jerk.

4) Second Life is not all about making money and having cyber sex. While those aspects are present in SL and seem to receive more media attention, know that there is much much more to this world.

And finally, my personal peeve:

5) CLEAN UP AFTER YOURSELF! Any land with building enabled is NOT your dumping ground - even if there is an auto-return in effect. This goes doubly for sandboxes! Don’t spam the area with useless crap or massive abandoned builds. It robs the ability for others to use the building area. Be considerate!
Quantum Hax
Registered User
Join date: 8 Feb 2007
Posts: 39
03-13-2007 06:51
From: Argus Collingwood

10. Friends
Don't offer friendship just to be friendly!
A "friend" is notified when you log-in, log-off and they can see where you are using the map, snoop, teleport to you (or close by!) - anywhere, anytime! - Friends should be real friends.

You can offer and accept friendship safely; by default, a new friend only can see if you online/offline, but not your location.

My 2 cents security precautions:
1. Do not accept unknown objects into your inventory.
Somebody can give you a huge prim or maliciously scripted object, so they will be activated after rezz.
2. When you click on unknown object, it can ask you for debit permissions and you can accidentally accept it. This is really ugly, as the scripted object can take all your money.
Fortunately, I did not come across, but it is possible.

Finally, if you are played 1st person shooters before, don't try the same in SL and waste money on guns - they are overpriced and useless.
Watermelon Tokyo
Join date: 20 Nov 2006
Posts: 93
03-13-2007 08:01
Lots of good advice here. Let me add 5 more...

1) Always try the demo first. (Try before you buy!)

2) $L1 is not worth 5 mins of sitting with zombies. (Camping sucks)

3) Throw things out. There are a million freebies out there, and 90% of them suck. Keep what you like, and toss the rest or your inventory will be a disaster.

4) Fill out your profile with SOMETHING, even if it's "my RL is not your business."

5) Learn to adjust your hair! Nobody looks good with bald patches.
Free eyes and prim sunglasses at the new Second Eyes main store in Plush Theta!
Marine Kelley
Your cutest PITA
Join date: 19 Nov 2006
Posts: 111
03-13-2007 08:15
A few random don'ts, not in any order of importance, just personal pet peeves :

- Don't friend anybody on sight before even starting conversation. Friends are people who wave at you when you log on, help you when you're in the need, have fun with you and make you grow. And who expect the same thing from you. Give Calling Cards to acquaintances and business partners.

- Don't IM someone you see because you like his/her look, unless either requested or at least needed. IMs are like phone calls, and are treated like that by residents. Someone called on phone by a stranger while talking with friends will expect the call not to be a complete waste of time.

- Don't enter private houses uninvited. Especially when the owner is in. Privacy is precious in SL, and is hard to achieve (I sooo wish camera could not pan through the walls)

- Don't plant yourself in front of a house, watching people inside it without saying a word. This is very irritating. We're not here for your entertainment as you're not here for ours.

- When you log off SL from a friends private place, be sure to not log back on at the "Last Location" the next time you log on, you could disturb your friend.

- Don't wear too much "bling" attachments, killer hundred-prim flexi hair or 1337 transformer armors just because they look nice. Think of others who are lagging like hell just because they are looking at you. Or in the end people won't look at you at all.

- There are entertainment areas for every taste, but not every area will allow all tastes. Learn to make the difference between PG sims, Mature sims and Mature sims allowing open sex behaviours.

- Be extremely careful about people who insist on knowing personal details about you. It always looks innocent at first but in the end it can really shake yourself. A lot of these people are predators. Avoid them.

- Never EVER trust what is written on top of other avatars names, namely "group tags". Anybody can start his own group and give himself a "Owner", "Manager", "Staff" etc tag and act like one. Never buy an item from someone who claims to work for the local shop owner. You will likely never get your money back nor any item in return.

I can think of plenty of others but that's all for now
Ceera Murakami
Texture Artist / Builder
Join date: 9 Sep 2005
Posts: 7,750
Ceera's tips for new SL Residents
03-13-2007 08:37
1: People are real people. Unlike most computer games, virtually every creature that looks even vaguely like a person and talks when spoken to is another Player - a real, live person somewhere else in the world. Even if they look like they are part animal, or are a robot, or are something else strange, if they have a name hovering over their head like you do, they are, in almost all cases a real person. They are not a simulation run by a machine for your enjoyment, target practice, or entertainment. If combat and violence interests you, please confine it to an area which has already been set up as a combat sim or a combat-approved venue. But please bear in mind that combat is NOT the main focus of Second Life for the majority of its residents. They are people, and may not even speak the same languages that you do. Treat all others with respect and consideration, as you would wish to be treated.

2: It all belongs to someone else! Unlike most computer games, virtually every bit of land, every building, every item that you see is already owned by someone else. If you want something, and it isn't clearly labeled as a 'Freebie', then it is something you must purchase from the owner, who is, in most cases, another Player. Virtually NOTHING in the game is a 'game asset' that is just there for you to take and use. People pay real money, in some cases thousands of real US Dollars, to purchase land and other assets for their own use. They most likely continue to pay real money every month to maintain that land. They usually do not appreciate strangers using their land or entering their homes as if they were public spaces, any more than you would appreciate a stranger in real life walking into your home or onto your property and using it as if it was their own, without any regard for your ownership of that home or property. If a building isn't very clearly labeled as a retail location, with items placed out for sale, then it is probably a home or some other private property. Respect it as such. Many people are quite proud of their homes, and will be glad to give an interested and polite guest a tour if you ask them. But don't walk in like it was a public bawdy house and interrupt whatever they are doing inside! You can stand outside and ask permission to enter, if you see one or more green dots on the map inside. Or you can determine the owner by reading the "about land" information for the place you are standing, and IM them for permission to look around.

3: Find the public spaces. There are some public spaces, where a person who is landless can practice building. They are called "sandboxes", and they are virtually always clearly marked as being for that use. Search for 'Sandbox' with the search function, and go to those places to learn to build, to unwrap purchased items, or to do other things that require rezzing prims on the ground. But bear in mind that anything placed in a sandbox is temporary. It will get wiped and returned on a regular basis, and can't be left there. If you want to build something permanent, you must purchase or lease land of your own, and build on your own land. Please, do NOT assume that just because you can rez a prim somewhere, it's OK to build there. If you don't have a sturdy fence, I can walk onto your lawn in real life and start digging a hole with a shovel, but that doesn't mean you approve of me doing so! It's no different in Second Life. Respect other's property rights, and practice building in marked sandboxes, or in places where you have asked for and received permission from the land owner to do so.

4: No easy money here. Regardless of what you may have heard or read, Second Life is NOT a place to make easy money. Less than one percent of the people who are active in Second Life have a positive cash flow in any given month. That means only that tiny fraction earns more money inside SL than thay pay in real money to enjoy SL. And only 200 or so out of over 4 million subscribed accounts make anything resembling a full-time living wage from what they earn in SL. Work inside SL pays less than a minimum wage job in most civilized nations, and just like anywhere else, you need skill and effort to be successful. There are no "get rich quick schemes" in SL that will remain profitable. If you want money to do things in SL, just get out a credit card and BUY IT.

5: It's a world, not a game. Treat Second Life like a foreign country that you can visit using your computer. It is a world full of amazing things, interesting people, and potential new friends. It's also a world that has its share of criminals and lowlifes who are willing and ready to rip you off or cause you grief for their own amusement and profit. But if you talk to people and make friends, you'll find that the majority of the people in SL are pretty decent folk, well worth getting to know. If you exercise the same caution and behaviors that you would when visiting a foreign land, you can have a very good time in SL. It's a wonderful world, in spite of all its faults. Welcome, and enjoy your stay.
Sorry, LL won't let me tell you where I sell my textures and where I offer my services as a sim builder. Ask me in-world.
Conifer Dada
Hiya m'dooks!
Join date: 6 Oct 2006
Posts: 3,716
03-13-2007 08:37
My own tips:

1) Look for freebies and cheapies - you can kit yourself out in decent clothes and there are a few good free skins, such as CS Passport Malibu.

2) Learn about building and texturing - this is the field in which you can exercise greatest creativity.

3) Live SL to the full - your avatar is the one who exists in SL. We, the avatars, are the in-world reality - our RL-ers merely facilitate our existence!!

4) Get to know lots about the places, workings and developments of SL.
Knowledge = status in SL, I think!

5) Stick with SL through the bad times that do occur (those 'what am I here for? moments) and after a while, get a Premium account if you haven't already, and buy a piece of land you can call home.
Gillian Waldman
Join date: 1 Oct 2006
Posts: 697
03-13-2007 08:58
From: Marine Kelley

- Never EVER trust what is written on top of other avatars names, namely "group tags". Anybody can start his own group and give himself a "Owner", "Manager", "Staff" etc tag and act like one. Never buy an item from someone who claims to work for the local shop owner. You will likely never get your money back nor any item in return.

I just want to point out that there are perfectly legitimate reasons for wearing a group tag with "owner" "member" etc. I have to have my group land tag on to build on my own land. If I then leave and don't change my group again, you will see "owner" above my head. I am not trying to scam anyone...
Marine Kelley
Your cutest PITA
Join date: 19 Nov 2006
Posts: 111
03-13-2007 09:05
Sorry Gillian I didn't mean to offend you. I didn't say everybody wearing an "Owner" tag (which is a group owner's default tag) was trying to steal money from people by pretending being in the shop's staff, I said it's easier to pretend belonging to a staff when wearing a "Owner" or "Staff" tag. That's different.
Colette Meiji
Registered User
Join date: 25 Mar 2005
Posts: 15,556
03-13-2007 09:36
5 things I think are good ideas -

1- Be nice to people. If they are rude go somewhere else. Makes for a brighter SL experience. (fighting people just leads to negative feelings )

2- If you havent done any online dating before and intend to in Second Life - take baby steps and be very careful. (Too many people rush in where angels fear to tread)

3- Be frugal, comparison shop, dont buy things from designers you dont know or arent recomended by people who's opinions on such things matter. (a lot of people spend far too much of their RL money and get bitter about it)

4- Dont overstay your welcome - keep your conversations reasonble in length. (a lot of people newer to online chatting will never stop chatting this is what leads to the dreaded death by IMS syndrom - Instead pretend its liek a phone call and politely wrap it up when someones busy.)

5- Go to places that arent on the popular places list. (theres a lot more out there than you see in those laggy sims)
Gillian Waldman
Join date: 1 Oct 2006
Posts: 697
03-13-2007 10:15
Colette - such good ones there :)
Meade Paravane
Join date: 21 Nov 2006
Posts: 4,845
03-13-2007 10:32
From: Egil Milner
3. Search is your best friend.

Yumi Murakami
Join date: 27 Sep 2005
Posts: 6,860
03-13-2007 10:37
There's some great advice here, but there's just one I do have to respond to:

From: Raymond Figtree
4) Don't give up. If you think there is no point, or nothing to do in SL, it's not SL, it's you.

I've seen several posts in other contexts saying this sort of thing, but the truth is, not being the kind of person who enjoys SL isn't a crippling character flaw any more than not being the kind of person who enjoys World of Warcraft is. Second Life is a lot more flexible but it can't really allow you to do absolutely anything you want; it is a society with a capitalist market, and as such does have mores, restrictions, scarcity etc.. To some extent you have to take it for what it is, and if it isn't what you like, there's no shame in quitting or just stopping for a bit. Forcing yourself to spend time in SL at times when you don't feel like it, on the grounds that "you ought to be able to have fun if only you were a good enough person", will just make you sad and mean that things are worse at times when you are in the right mood for SL.
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