My complaint about Linden Lab

Thanks Ishtar, I sent you a PM.

Heh, children of Kant go wild!

My complaint about Project Neualtenburg

I've been debating with myself over the last few weeks whether or not I should write this letter. Obviously, I outvoted myself and wrote it. I concluded I absolutely had to tell you that as a time-honored expression maintains, "To set the record straight, we have to work diligently and effectively to deal with Project Neualtenburg appropriately". I realize that some of you may not know the particular background details of the events I'm referring to. I'm not going to go into those details here, but you can read up on them elsewhere.

Project Neualtenburg's adulators are quick to point out that because Project Neualtenburg is hated, persecuted, and repeatedly laughed at, it is the real victim here. The truth is that, if anything, Project Neualtenburg is a victim of its own success -- a success that enables Project Neualtenburg to rescue misoneism from the rubbish heap of history, dust it off, slap on a coat of cheap sophistry, and market it as new and improved. I would like to digress here. In a recent essay, Project Neualtenburg stated that trees cause more pollution than automobiles do. Since the arguments it made in the rest of its essay are based in part on that assumption, it should be aware that it just isn't true. Not only that, but its faculty for deception is so far above anyone else's, it really must be considered different in kind as well as in degree. To say that university professors must conform their theses and conclusions to Project Neualtenburg's ugly prejudices if they want to publish papers and advance their careers is foolish nonsense and untrue to boot. No doubt, each of us should realize after a moment's thought that we must develop an alternative community, a cohesive and comprehensive underground with a charter to give Project Neualtenburg condign punishment, -- not just in the poetic sense, but in the very specific and prosaic terms I am outlining in this letter. But if you've read any of the iconoclastic, tyrannical slop that Project Neualtenburg has concocted, you'll undeniably recall Project Neualtenburg's description of its plan to leave a large part of this country's workforce dislocated and disillusioned. If you haven't read any of it, well, all you really need to know is that Project Neualtenburg has never satisfactorily proved its assertion that chauvinism is a noble goal. It has merely justified that assertion with the phrase, "Because I said so."

There are some out-of-touch moochers who are recalcitrant. There are also some who are perverted. Which category does Project Neualtenburg fall into? If the question overwhelms you, I suggest you check "both". Project Neualtenburg's rantings are not an abstract problem. They have very concrete, immediate, and unpleasant consequences. For instance, I wish paltry, inconsiderate harijans like Project Neualtenburg's compeers would quit whining and try doing some honest work for a change. In view of that, it is not surprising that Project Neualtenburg is an interesting organization. On the one hand, it likes to send brassbound, blinkered doomsday prophets on safari holidays instead of publicly birching them. But on the other hand, if it had done its homework, it'd know that it claims to have turned over a new leaf shortly after getting caught trying to make my stomach turn. This claim is an outright lie that is still being circulated by Project Neualtenburg's supporters. The truth is that if Project Neualtenburg thinks that anyone who disagrees with it is ultimately clueless, then it's sadly mistaken. Those who get involved with Project Neualtenburg's disorderly subordinates are seldom aware of Project Neualtenburg's dealings with the most short-sighted kleptomaniacs you'll ever see. I put that observation into this letter just to let you see that Project Neualtenburg apparently wants to use us to fulfill its combative mission. So don't feed me any phony baloney about how it has mystical powers of divination and prophecy. That's just not true. While it is essential -- and among my highest priorities -- to seek liberty, equality, and fraternity, Project Neualtenburg's publications are rife with contradictions and difficulties; they're totally grungy, meet no objective criteria, and are unsuited for a supposedly educated population. And as if that weren't enough, I recently heard Project Neualtenburg tell a bunch of people that it knows 100% of everything 100% of the time. I can't adequately describe my first reaction to this notion; I simply don't know how to represent uncontrollable laughter in text.

I find Project Neualtenburg's belief systems rather simple-minded, don't you? I wouldn't waste my time trying to dispense justice if Project Neualtenburg's outbursts weren't parroted by so many semi-intelligible anthropophagi. Am I aware of how Project Neualtenburg will react when it reads that last sentence? Yes. Do I care? No, because I've tried explaining to its sycophants that it is far more interested in fattening itself on the various processes of decay in our society than it is in helping us raise the quality of debate on issues surrounding its unambitious circulars, but it is clear to me in talking to them that they have no comprehension of what I'm saying. I might as well be talking to creatures from Mars.

Since most people oppose Project Neualtenburg's ribald tirades, it has had to resolve a moral failure with an immoral solution using every frowzy means imaginable. One might think that Project Neualtenburg uses its influence to break down the industrial-technological system, and this is, not surprisingly, the case. It strikes me as amusing that Project Neualtenburg complains about people who do nothing but complain. Well, news flash! It does nothing but complain. That's our situation today, in very rough outline. Of course, I've left out a thousand details and refinements and qualifications. I've not mentioned that Project Neualtenburg can't discuss anything without talking about Pyrrhonism. And I've ignored hooliganism altogether. I've simply pointed out one key fact: Project Neualtenburg's projects are a perfect example of overgeneralization and blatant oligarchism.

If you are stimulated by new ideas, and if you can think for yourself rather than simply accept what the clitoris dishes out, I think you will find this letter of interest. Let me cut to the chase: The clitoris thinks it would be a great idea to cause subversion to gather momentum on college campuses. Even if we overlook the logistical impossibilities of such an idea, the underlying premise is still flawed. How dare the clitoris criticize my values when its are so obviously filthy? The clitoris claims that its opinions represent the opinions of the majority -- or even a plurality. That claim is preposterous and, to use the clitoris's own language, overtly abominable.

Resistance is futile. You will be assimilated.

LOL! This is my fave so far

please please somebody with some musical talent feed one of those into some text to speech software and set it to a phat beat.

also, unless you want to accumulate a long list of examples of my kitties Checkers, Edward, Scat, Minx, and Murphy's acts of corruption and depredation, this letter may become a bit monotonous. However, I truly do hope you read it all the way through, because my kitties Checkers, Edward, Scat, Minx, and Murphy fit the stereotypical image of obtuse bums. As a preliminary, I want to turn random, senseless violence into meaningful action. My kitties Checkers, Edward, Scat, Minx, and Murphy's manifestos are the epitome of insensitivity. I challenge them to move from their broad derogatory generalizations to specific instances to prove otherwise. I would like to end on a heartfelt note. It ruffles my feathers that my kitties Checkers, Edward, Scat, Minx, and Murphy want to spread revanchism all over the globe like pigeon droppings over Trafalgar Square.

To all readers: This is not a tickle-your-ears, politically correct letter. If you want to read something that's filled with rhetoric, read something else. If you want the truth, then read this letter. What follows is the story of how my anus can be so rich in the rhetoric of democracy and yet so poor in its implementation.

Now, why all this fuss about a few out-of-touch statements? Simply put, it's because my current plan is to review the basic issues at the root of the debate. Yes, it will draw upon the most powerful fires of Hell to tear that plan asunder, but the first response to this from its advocates is perhaps that it's inappropriate to teach children right from wrong. Wrong. Just glance at the facts: It believes that its exegeses are all sweetness and light. Sorry, but I have to call foul on that one. Please don't misread my words here; certain facts are clear. For instance, my anus says that it needs a little more time to clean up its act. As far as I'm concerned, my anus's time has run out. If my anus can overawe and befuddle a sufficient number of prominent individuals, then it will become virtually impossible for anyone to challenge my anus's conceited assumptions about merit. To borrow the immortal words of a certain, well-known authority figure, "My anus has a penchant for counterinsurgency and clandestine operations." My anus's ramblings are based on a technique I'm sure you've heard of. It's called "lying".

My anus is an interesting organization. On the one hand, it likes to create widespread psychological suffering. But on the other hand, it is reluctant to resolve problems. It always just looks the other way and hopes no one will notice that its votaries tend to fall into the mistaken belief that it is a bearer and agent of the Creator's purpose, mainly because they live inside a my anus-generated illusion-world and talk only with each other. Currently, my anus's paroxysms merely hammer a few more nails into the coffin of freedom. As you will see before the year is over, this is only the tip of a gigantic iceberg. Finally, if this letter generates a response from someone of opposing viewpoints, I would hope that the author(s) concentrate on offering objections to my ideas while refraining from attacks on my person or my intelligence. I've gotten enough of that already from my anus.

Organized Anuses! Run The sky is falling! Well, something's falling...

Hey James...... MOO.

PS. - I drive my own damn bus, biotch!!!! LOL

PPS - From someone who DID read that entire diatribe... what exactly is a slatternly weasel anyway??? Who TALKS like that???

PPPS - There is NO SUCH THING AS COLLECTIVE GUILT. True guilt or innocence can only be held by an individual person. And only THEY know/decide/judge in their heart of hearts if they are guilty or not, for whatever reason.

Individual morality IMHO is ALWAYS more important than any morality that society places upon us.

"Hatred of that which is wrong is a powerful and valuable tool." YAYYYY TOO RIGHT! But it's WE as individuals who must choose what is wrong or right

"My conclusion is that what's best for all of us is for me to show principle, gumption, verve, and nerve." Wow that's a great line too!

LOL that's nuts! Adding more comments as I go on....

This thread must be where all the Doctors of English hang out. Im not sure President Bush could even comprehend some of those words. LOL! Where the hell is my Dictionary Dammit?

After reading this letter, you will never again be able to trust Princess Toadstool, and you will see with crystal clarity the way that those who exhibit cruelty to animals (especially mushrooms!) must be held accountable for their actions. Without going into all the gory details, let's just say that one of the things I find quite interesting is listening to other people's takes on things. For instance, I recently overheard some folks remark that her minions think that sin is good for the soul. I say to them, "Prove it" -- not that they'll be able to, of course, but because if I wanted to brainwash and manipulate a large segment of the population, I would convince them that Toadstool is merely trying to make this world a better place in which to live. In fact, that's exactly what Toadstool does as part of her quest to exhibit a deep disdain for all people who are not presumptuous, ruthless unimaginative-types. Princess Toadstool is trying to brainwash us. She wants us to believe that it's illiterate to do something good for others; that's boring; that's not cool. You know what I think of that, don't you? I think that ignorance is bliss. This may be why Toadstool's agents provocateurs are generally all smiles (glares at Mario and Luigi). And that, in my view, is our real problem.

PS - I'm just upset that the word "splenetic" didn't show up in mine LOL

Haha, I did the same thing, only I kept it short and sweet at 3 paragraphs!

Siobhan

My complaint about People Who drive too Slow in the Fast Lane

Let's start this letter with a little quiz:

1. Why doesn't People who drive too slow in the fast lane point a critical finger at itself for a change?
2. Does People who drive too slow in the fast lane realize it's more evil than most atrabilious roustabouts?
3. Essay: Compare and contrast People who drive too slow in the fast lane's views to those of conniving loudmouths, focusing especially on who is more likely to dismantle national civil rights organizations by driving a wedge between the leaders and the rank-and-file members.

Don't worry; I'll give you all the answers throughout the course of this letter as well as a wealth of other information about People who drive too slow in the fast lane. Read on, gentle reader, and hear what I have to say. If People who drive too slow in the fast lane were as bright as it thinks it is, it'd know that its coadjutors' thinking is fenced in by many constraints. Their minds are not free because they dare not be. Sleazy mafia dons may endanger our property or our security or our economic well-being, but People who drive too slow in the fast lane endangers our souls. I want to make this clear, so that those who do not understand deeper messages embedded within sarcastic irony -- and you know who I'm referring to -- can process my point. You are, I'm sure, well aware that the blatant ignorance and social maladjustment of People who drive too slow in the fast lane's anecdotes will reduce history to an overdetermined, wireframe sketch of what are, in reality, complex, dynamic events in a lustrum or two. But did you know that People who drive too slow in the fast lane is so confident in its own intellectual and cultural paradigm that it is blind to global realities?

The world would be better off if People who drive too slow in the fast lane had never been created. To pretend otherwise is nothing but hypocrisy and unwillingness to face the more unpleasant realities of life. Unfortunately, People who drive too slow in the fast lane's pertinacious, merciless musings neglect to take one important factor into consideration: human nature. What was morally wrong five years ago is just as wrong today, period. This is not to say that my opinions are the obverse of People who drive too slow in the fast lane's. It is merely to point out that for the nonce, People who drive too slow in the fast lane is content to demand special treatment that, in many cases, borders on the ridiculous. But quicker than you can double-check the spelling of "scientificophilosophical", it will tear down everything that can possibly be regarded as a support of cultural elevation. I have always assumed that the agenda that People who drive too slow in the fast lane is attempting to advance is one of escapism, repression, and Comstockism, but the fact of the matter is that People who drive too slow in the fast lane is just making a mug of itself when it says that its imprecations are all sweetness and light. In fact, I have said that to People who drive too slow in the fast lane on many occasions, and I will keep on saying it until it stops trying to spread hatred, animosity, and divisiveness.

Now that I've been exposed to People who drive too slow in the fast lane's personal attacks, I must admit that I don't completely understand them. Perhaps I need to get out more. Or perhaps I must admit that I've read only a small fraction of People who drive too slow in the fast lane's writings. (As a well-known aphorism states, it is not necessary to eat all of an apple to learn that it is rotten.) Nevertheless, I've read enough of People who drive too slow in the fast lane's writings to know that when a mistake is made, the smart thing to do is to admit it and reverse course. That takes real courage. The way that People who drive too slow in the fast lane stubbornly refuses to own up to its mistakes serves only to convince me that the dogs of commercialism are barking up a storm, driven half-mad by the thought that there is an open consensus that People who drive too slow in the fast lane once used its notoriety, name recognition, and national fund-raising base to blitz media outlets with faxes and newsletters that highlight the good points of its tendentious, subversive credos. And that furious barking is music to my ears, because People who drive too slow in the fast lane turns its back on our most heartfelt pleas for mercy. Of course, this sounds simple, but in reality, the real issue is simple: The simple ability to give our propaganda fighters an instrument that is very much needed at this time is a pons asinorum that People who drive too slow in the fast lane may never cross. It is a statistical certainty that People who drive too slow in the fast lane's ideals are grotesque through and through, just as it is a statistical certainty that it's undoubtedly a tragedy that its goal in life is apparently to toy with our opinions. Here, I use the word "tragedy" as the philosopher Whitehead used it. Whitehead stated that "the essence of dramatic tragedy is not unhappiness. It resides in the solemnity of the remorseless working of things," which I interpret as saying that "People who drive too slow in the fast lane" has now become part of my vocabulary. Whenever I see someone incite young people to copulate early, often, and indiscriminately, I tell him or her to stop "People who drive too slow in the fast lane-ing". I wouldn't judge People who drive too slow in the fast lane's satraps too harshly. They're unequivocally just cannon fodder for People who drive too slow in the fast lane's plot to burn our fair cities to the ground. So, sorry for being so long-winded in this letter, but I will let People who drive too slow in the fast lane's record speak for itself.

I like the over-bearing use of rediculously long and impractical words.

antidisestablishmentarianism?

The obvious use of inflated words are just serving ego in this piece.

Maybe it's a personal preference, but I think communicating complex thoughts in simple language is more effective than yammering out long-winded and convoluted statements. I wish I could find the link that would add a little spice to this point -- but just take my word on this (or not): the government of Ontario is investigating methods to force the use of more simple language. Language-use has been getting out of hand in complexity; boards and committees are wasting time debating semantics rather than ideas.

However,

it was still funny I suppose.

wtg james.

lol love it.

Apparently James your the one that got away

Hugz
Cat

The nature and extent of our current national crisis, as well as its causes and cures, are the subject of intense political struggle. I offer this letter as a contribution to that struggle and debate in hopes of helping to reveal the truth about the FIC's agendas. To plunge right into it, our national media is controlled by manipulative apostates. That's why you probably haven't heard that the FIC hates it when you say that it has a certain fondness for mischievous jejune-types. It really hates it when you say that. Try saying that to it sometime, if you have a thick skin and don't mind having it shriek insults at you. Now, it is not my purpose to suggest that the FIC gives new meaning to the word "self-absorbed", but rather to anneal discourse with honesty, clear thinking, and a sense of moral good. It unmistakably shouldn't be necessary to have to say such things, but I respect the English language and believe in the use of words as a means of communication. Inhumane Luddites like the FIC, however, consider spoken communication as merely a set of noises uttered to excite emotions in birdbrained ratbags of one sort or another in order to convince them to spread hatred, animosity, and divisiveness. I am not mistaken when I say that the net effect of the FIC's belief systems will be a generation of kids who are unable to read, write, or distinguish good from evil. And that's why I'm writing this letter; this is my manifesto, if you will, on how to increase awareness and understanding of our similarities and differences. There's no way I can do that alone, and there's no way I can do it without first stating that if isolationism were an Olympic sport, it would clinch the gold medal.

The FIC should learn to appreciate what it has instead of feeling so oppressed because it can't do everything it wants, every time it wants to. As a matter of policy, sexist insurrectionists should not change the course of history, but this has never stopped the FIC. If you can go more than a minute without hearing the FIC talk about sesquipedalianism, you're either deaf, dumb, or in a serious case of denial. The FIC's grievances are continually evolving into more and more morally crippled incarnations. Here, I'm not just talking about evolution in a simply Darwinist sense; I'm also talking about how the FIC's ideological colors may have changed over the years. Nevertheless, its core principle has remained the same: to spawn delusions of alarmism's resplendence. If you don't believe me, then note that the FIC's devotees often reverse the normal process of interpretation. That is, they value the unsaid over the said, the obscure over the clear. If it weren't for mendacious riffraff, the FIC would have no friends. Even though supposedly distancing itself from rapacious, lousy ignoramuses, the FIC has really not changed its spots at all. To recap the main points made in this letter: 1) many lives have been lost to jingoism, 2) the only appropriate attitudes in a society overrun by stupid losers are fear and distrust, and 3) the FIC combines greed and blood lust into a single persona.



- sesquipedalianism?

roflmao

Cat

Hurray! I almost read one whole sentence of the original post!