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Star Wars ep.3 ......SUCKED!! |
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Zaid Vox
Registered User
Join date: 9 Apr 2005
Posts: 66
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05-22-2005 12:21
bump
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Seth Kanahoe
political fugue artist
Join date: 30 Jan 2005
Posts: 1,220
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05-22-2005 12:40
OK, so the first Star Wars was comic book, but it was fun and in 1977, nobody had ever seen anything like it before.
But The Empire Strikes Back showed real promise. Not a great film, but a number of great scenes - the appearance of the snow walkers, for example, and of course the "Luke, I am your father" scene, which threatened to turn the entire series into something memorable. Alas, nearly everything else since then has been dreck. No art I can see, just exploitation of the original sense of fun. The latest Star Wars film is particularly bad because Lucas and his people promised us a return to the dark, multidimensional approach of The Empire Strikes Back. Bah. What a lie. The best thing about the current film are the cityscapes, architecture, and general look. It's done in 1920s and 1930s art-deco mechanical style, and it looks great. I could almost watch the film again just to see the magnificent city of Coriscant. Almost. btw, I'd read recently that Lucas originally wanted to cast Christopher Walken as Han Solo. And that there's film of a part-reading out there somewhere. Now that would have been interesting. |
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Chip Midnight
ate my baby!
Join date: 1 May 2003
Posts: 10,231
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05-22-2005 12:41
I haven't seen it yet but probably will soon. I'm expecting a visual feast strung together by bad writing, horridly wooden dialogue, and poor direction... exactly like all of the other movies, including the first three. The only major differences between the first three and the current three... I was 12 then. Now I'm not. That, and special effects have come a very long way since the late 70's. 12 year olds still think it's the greatest thing ever.
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Garoad Kuroda
Prophet of Muppetry
Join date: 5 Sep 2003
Posts: 2,989
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05-23-2005 00:27
Bah you're all pessimists, it's fine!
1. No cute n fuzzy/comic relief creatures like Jar-Jar or Ewoks to distract/detract from the overall plot, (unless you count R2-D2, which I thought his scenes were awesome and a lot of fun, not stupid at all) Yep, R2 was cool. C3 was about as useless as ever though. WTF is he supposed to be USEFUL for anyway? I mean, besides whining and crying like a baby and being paranoid? Stupid piece of scrap metal would be more useful recycled as a toaster. But even that would suck, because who would want to listen to a whining wussy toaster? Is he gold plated? If that's the case he should just be melted down into gold ingots. Help the economy some, and stop being so damn useless you stupid bucket of bolts! R2 is 1,000 times more useful than your tin man ass, and he's shaped like a salt and pepper shaker FFS! 2. I think that Anakin's transition to the dark side was handled fairly well, although the first part of the movie dragged on a bt too long for my taste. Hey, waddya know, he made the choice out of LOVE... hmmm interesting paradox!  I do think it was a BIT of a stretch, maybe not 100% believable. Seemed like a little too quick of a change, considering he went from one total extreme in philosophy to the other. But the real kicker for me was--HOW CAN YOU HAVE DEATH STAR TECHNOLOGY AND STILL NOT BE ABLE TO PREVENT DEATHS FROM CHILD BIRTH? Hell, if they can't do it, maybe they should have just went back in time to see a friggin ROMAN age doctor and have him help them out... (ok not really )3. I liked how they pretty much tied everything up. I was really worried before I saw it that I wouldn't be satisfied with how he wrapped things up, but I didn't have that feeling at all when I left the theater. They did tie the trilogies together really well. 4. I really appreciated Lucas' efforts to evolve the architecture and vehicles start to resemble the ones in IV and onward. Did anyone else notice that the colors that the clone warriors wore (faded red, blue, yellow, green) are the same colors that the Rebel forces use in subsequent movies... so the Stormtroopers become all white, kind of representing the purging/reorganization of forces once the Empire is created. The stormtroopers I noticed, that was pretty cool. 5. Yoda kicks major ass once again!  Little bastard is quick, he is. The things about this one I DIDN'T like are: 1. Too long. They could easily have chopped a 1/2 hour out of the movie by elimintaing the ridiculously bad acted love scenes. Don't mind the length but I totally agree those boring parts almost ruined it. Dialogue made me want to stab myself in the eye with a toothpick but I didn't have any at the time. Too bad, because it would have been more fun. 2. Count how many damn times you see a scene where a ship is landing on some platform somewhere. It's EXCESSIVE! On the order of at least a dozen, probably a lot more times, each time they show that it takes up a minute or two more of useless footage. OK, Anakin flew to this location, we get it already! Didn't notice...didn't mind...only remember one. I liked the (old style?) scene transitions though. 3. The large scale battle scenes. They were excessively chaotic. You couldn't follow any of the action at all, it was just a klooge of "stuff" moving on the screen... look back at the original 3 movies... you could actually follow the action much better, even in the big battle scenes. That was about my favorite part of the movie. It's how space battle should be, TOTAL CHAOS!  If they make a game that tries to simulate it I might get it! Even if it has a shitty linear storyline like movie games typically have...bleh.4. General Grevious. OK, Lucas must have decided that the only way to top Darth Maul's double-sided lightsabre was to have a character that uses FOUR. That was just stupid. And they never really explained why the guy coughed all the time! LOL That was ok...would have liked a little more biography myself though. I'm guessing parts of him were "alive" or something. And finally, even though he was 95% replaced by machine parts, the remaining 5% "living parts" that couldn't be replaced were finally failing? What I did find cheesy was some of the names, "Grevious" being one of them. Forget the other one that I thought was bad. 5. The first 1/2 of the movie plodded along rather slowly. Parts of it... 6. If they really wanted to demonstrate that there was still a small part of Darth that was good, they would have had him let the padawan children go instead of slaughtering them. Bad move on Lucas' part I think, but it did certainly make him look much more evil! That was a little of a shock, I think it was a screwup too. But then, when you go from so *ridiculously good* to so *ridiculously bad* in such a short time, I guess you have to take drastic measures? 7. The post-Vader-gets-fitted-into-his-suit scene "NOOOOOO!" was just gay and could have been handled much more dramatically. Can't remember it, either I blocked it out (which is ENTIRELY likely), or it didn't impress upon me. 8. The Jedi were dispatched WAAAAY too easily when they were ambushed. I was pretty disappointed with that. I guess so. But the only way to fix that would be to make your #1 complaint even worse, they'd have to make it longer. More wasn't really needed for the storyline but I agree it'd be pretty kickass to see some more glorious deaths. They especially lost some good opportunities to "trick" the audience alot, too. Oh...oh...maybe he's gonna get away!!! Wait...or...not... 9. Put some damn railings up on those high walkways for chrissake! Actually that part has bothered me in ALL the movies! LOL Didn't notice...I guess "in the future" they can't afford such luxuries... One thing I did find excessively stupid was how they jumped, from 20 meters away or something, onto the tiny "floating" thingies hovering over LAVA and using them essentially as skateboards... _____________________
BTW
WTF is C3PO supposed to be USEFUL for anyway, besides whining? Stupid piece of scrap metal would be more useful recycled as a toaster. But even that would suck, because who would want to listen to a whining wussy toaster? Is he gold plated? If that's the case he should just be melted down into gold ingots. Help the economy some, and stop being so damn useless you stupid bucket of bolts! R2 is 1,000 times more useful than your tin man ass, and he's shaped like a salt and pepper shaker FFS! |
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Chance Abattoir
Future Rockin' Resmod
Join date: 3 Apr 2004
Posts: 3,898
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05-23-2005 00:55
Wildly cynical yes, but if you can enjoy a cloud -- don't go claiming nihilism or anything.  I've never claimed to be a nihilist. Misanthrope, yes. That's not to say I don't love humans too; I just hate them more than I love them. _____________________
"The mob requires regular doses of scandal, paranoia and dilemma to alleviate the boredom of a meaningless existence."
-Insane Ramblings, Anton LaVey |
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Komuso Tokugawa
Registered User
Join date: 3 Mar 2005
Posts: 93
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05-23-2005 01:44
It was interesting to see Yoda quote the essence of Taoism in his little speech to anakin early on, but it annoys me to see that Lucas dilutes it with his simplistic chi/ki ripoff misinterpretation of "light vanquish's dark force" approach.
You would think if he went to all that trouble to make yoda and the jedi direct descendants of Taoism (although some say he based the jedi on samuri), he would at least also be true to one of the central philosophical precepts. Bah, hollowood... Would you like to know more? http://www.exn.ca/starwars/taoism.cfm I like the architecture and ship design, especially the design evolution linkages to ep 4-6 ... nicely done. and the reference at the end as to how to Obi Wan communes from the grave later on...always had me stumped in LOTR how gandalf managed to do that. Greevy's coughing also annoyed me initially, but then when they show his eyes and heart I suppose he's just a sick cyborg, not a full bot, so it makes sense. and would a jedi night really leave a burning limbless cursing torso writhing in pain...I don't think so...a quick jab with the LS would have been more to form I think. or maybe not after he killed all the younglings...but I really thought Obi Wan was above revenge, esp as he just sliced and diced him anyway. Still, one of the better episodes for me. Oh, and the comedic robots in the first scene were funny/silly...some light humour before the darkeness descends. |
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Torley Linden
Enlightenment!
Join date: 15 Sep 2004
Posts: 16,530
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05-23-2005 01:54
But even that would suck, because who would want to listen to a whining wussy toaster? Is he gold plated? If that's the case he should just be melted down into gold ingots. Help the economy some, and stop being so damn useless you stupid bucket of bolts! R2 is 1,000 times more useful than your tin man ass, and he's shaped like a salt and pepper shaker FFS! Best. Droidslam. Evar. _____________________
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Xtopherxaos Ixtab
D- in English
Join date: 7 Oct 2004
Posts: 884
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05-23-2005 09:04
btw, I'd read recently that Lucas originally wanted to cast Christopher Walken as Han Solo. And that there's film of a part-reading out there somewhere. Now that would have been interesting. Also, they were casting the roles for Star Wars alongside the roles for Stephen King's Carrie. Carrie Fisher was unwilling to do a nude scene (the infamous shower scene from Carrie), so the producers picked Sissy Spacek for Carrie, though they at first wanted her to be Leia...and the kinda-more-famous Carrie Fisher (from her mother) in the much more highly anticipated role as Carrie.. |
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Artillo Fredericks
Friendly Orange Demon
Join date: 1 Jun 2004
Posts: 1,327
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05-23-2005 09:15
Yea I was watching some show on cable before I went to see the movie and they were talking about the making of Star Wars and how they took 9 months to cast etc. It was very cool seeing people like Kurt Russell or Perry King reading for Han Solo, or that guy from "The Greatest American Hero" auditioning for Luke, or Cindy Williams auditioning for Princess Leia! Geez could you imagine how different the movies would be? OMG would that mean that Harrison Ford would be destined to be Snake Plisskin instead of Kurt Russell? Wow bizarro world hahaa
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"I, for one, am thouroughly entertained by the mass freakout." - Nephilaine Protagonist
--== www.artillodesign.com ==-- |
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Garoad Kuroda
Prophet of Muppetry
Join date: 5 Sep 2003
Posts: 2,989
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05-24-2005 22:29
Best. Droidslam. Evar. Perhaps it's sig worthy! I'm getting tired of pokemon anyway! _____________________
BTW
WTF is C3PO supposed to be USEFUL for anyway, besides whining? Stupid piece of scrap metal would be more useful recycled as a toaster. But even that would suck, because who would want to listen to a whining wussy toaster? Is he gold plated? If that's the case he should just be melted down into gold ingots. Help the economy some, and stop being so damn useless you stupid bucket of bolts! R2 is 1,000 times more useful than your tin man ass, and he's shaped like a salt and pepper shaker FFS! |
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Lianne Marten
Cheese Baron
Join date: 6 May 2004
Posts: 2,192
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05-24-2005 23:00
One thing I did find excessively stupid was how they jumped, from 20 meters away or something, onto the tiny "floating" thingies hovering over LAVA and using them essentially as skateboards... And then how Vader can't jump 5 feet to the edge of the slope or to the sides of Obi Wan... although I can buy that maybe his anger blinded him to anything but a direct attack. Still... *shrugs* _____________________
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